* Posts by Dazed and Confused

2145 posts • joined 12 Sep 2007

France stalls plan to make Google and pals foot broadband rollout

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Next step

Carrefour forced to buy all French citizens a new car.

Look out, fanbois: One in two nicked mobes is an iPhone - cops

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Joke

Stop and search

So, been seen using an iPhone in public and the BiB will be feeling your collar.

Scientists spin carbon nanotube threads on industrial scale

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And for the next trick

They just need to work out an energy efficient method to spin it directly out of CO2 and they'll be able to tackle two problems at once.

Can't wait to see where this trick takes us.

Apple 'slashes iPhone 5 screen orders', tight-fisted fanbois blamed

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Re: Problems

Yes eventually they fitted an optical correction HW, I thought they'd used a SW based solution to tidy up many of the images before then.

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Re: Problems

> 2. The crystals used to protect the camera lens give photos a purple haze under certain circumstances. Since this is a hardware problem, Apple cannot fix this without releasing the next version of the iPhone. Will Apple admit their faulty design and give us a camera worthy of 2013?

Why wouldn't Apple be able to fix a colour cast problem in SW. All the image you see has been heavily processed before it end up in a file. You could put a bright yellow filter in front of the lens and they could fix it in SW (ok in extreme cases you'd loose a little quality, but a slight tint no problems). Take a look at the history of the Hubble telescope, the lens (mirror) is out of wack but they corrected it in SW.

Facebook testing $100 fee to mail Mark Zuckerberg

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Re: Cheaper way

> Unlike the other biz model, this way will get cheaper and cheaper too, the way FB shares are going.

wait another couple of months and for $100 you'll be the majority share holder then Zuck will have to listen to you.

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How about the reverse?

Can I charge FB $100 for each crappy message they send me?

I could afford to retire on that.

Blighty's schools shake on new 3-year deal with Microsoft

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An alternative proposal

Since MS are so keen to hook the school kids on today as potential customers of the future, surely it would make more sense for them to be paying for the privilege?

The negotiations should go along the lines of:

Government procurement officer: If you want any children in this country to grow up using any of your SW you'll need to pay £100 per student per year.

Salesman: No, you miss understand this relationship, I'm a salesman, you are supposed to give me money.

GPO: There's a door over there, have they taught you how to use one yet? Come back when your advertising department have explained to you just how much this deal is worth... to you

Twitter won't unmask racist Frenchie unless US judge says so

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I wouldn't suggest that anyone from Twitter try visiting France

They might well end up sleeping a hotel with better locks on the door than they were expecting. The French judge might well decide that when they are in the US they're allowed to follow US law, but when they are in France they're his.

Panasonic pitches Ultra HD 4K x 2K monster tablet

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Re: Dump the Windoze

Anything that can't run vi doesn't count as a computer.

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Dump the Windoze

Install Linux and this looks like the ideal toy.

BT in ad slapdown after 'misleading' punters on fibre deployment dates

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Same here

Originally BT was saying October 2011. Then in October the site switched to saying December 2012. Later 2012 it says 31st of December 2012. Then mid December, they own up to the fact that the cabinet won't be done till 31st of March.

They also seem to have doubled the distance to my house in recent years. Back when you could first get ADSL there was an engineering test number that you were not allowed to call, which would tell you the line length. This gave the distance from my house to the exchange by following BT's policy of "Use longest route possible" to wire up the phone system. Now they are quoting a much greater distance, Maybe they've found some even longer cables they can use.

'Physical pressure' from Iran’s cyber cops killed blogger

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report calls for

the detention centres to have CCTV so the committee can watch while the cyber police torture people.

Nice.

Ten affordable mid-sized Full HD monitors

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Re: 1920x1080 is so 2010...

1920x1200 is just so 2003, or even so 1990ish.

Please Please Please El'Reg can we have an editorial policy of referring to desktop display with less than 1200 lines as

Super low res.

or Maybe an El'Reg competition to find the best acronym for FullHD

Flaming Useless Low ??? Half Display

'SHUT THE F**K UP!' The moment Linus Torvalds ruined a dev's year

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Re: #1 Rule of Management

> So much for criticizing in private.

The problem with this is that Linux's development happens out in the open.

What we don't know from here is the background to the comment and since this quote is completely without context we don't know whether the "Shut the F**K UP!" was a friendly one or a rage mode one. Its not at all uncommon for friends to swear at each other without being totally pissed off with each other. I remember working on a development project years ago with a team of programmers from all over the world and an American manager, the poor guy never could get his head around the way we spoke to each other, or the fact that if we'd started to be nice the other members of the team would have worried what was wrong.

I've sat in code review meetings in professional development environments and believe me, that comment is mild if someone is trying to shift the blame from their ugly code onto the code that supposed to be calling it. Been on both sides of comments. You learn to tidy up your approach. I was just lucky enough for it to be a private meeting inside a private company.

Microsoft says Google trying to undermine Windows Phone

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Re: Ironic!

> That is what happens when it meets the "do no evil" pot.

So what is evil about trying to put M$ out of our misery?

Major new science: Women more nude, more often online

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More researchers with a breast fixation

> They measured the physical attractiveness of the Second Life avatars by measuring the waist-chest ratios for females

Not all blokes measure attractiveness by choosing the bird with the biggest Bulgarian AirBags.

I think these guys should get out more.

Crushing $1.17bn Marvell patent judgment could set record

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Re: RE: AC 00:51

> (Where would we be today if Microsoft had patented and was enforcing every one of the common controls and the basic web fonts.)

Fortunately M$ weren't responsible for any of these.

Most of the basic controls were in existence back before MicroSoft got into the "windows" game.

The basic look at feel and the 3D effects came from HP (there was an agreement to ensure that Motif and Windows 3.1 looked and acted the same for users), a lot of the controls were being used at DEC too way back when.

Of course Xerox who invented Windows, had the things like dialog boxes, the various styles of buttons, the different forms of menus etc...

And all that dates back before the Apple Lisa.

M$ are the new boys on the block.

Brazilian-made 'iphone' runs Android 2.3 Gingerbread

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How long

Till Cupertino does what it always does when it goofs and forgets to acquire the rights to some name or other after launching a product. It buys the name.

If these guys registered the name in 2000 then they own the name in Brazil.

The problem won't be the iphone, it will be when these guys get the sales of iPhones stopped. Now this isn't going to make them many friends. But Apple are going to need to come to the table and sort out a deal. Lets face it, Apple ain't going to choose to rename their product are they.

PGP, TrueCrypt-encrypted files CRACKED by £300 tool

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Needs Firewire

So another way to protect yourself would be a piece of SW which automatically detected when something was plugged into the FW (or other interface dumb enough to allow direct memory access) and wiped the key from memory.

ICANN'T believe it's not Apple: Vatican wins domain-handout lottery

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.moron

Are the people who dreamt this lot up being forcibly moved onto the new .moron TLD?

Bankrupt Kodak misses $2bn target, flogs imaging patents for $525m

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Re: No, this isn't price fixing.

Well I'd argue that it is price fixing. Its just that customers ganging up on a supplier doesn't appear to be illegal whereas suppliers ganging up on customers is.

The losers are all the pension funds owning Kodak shares. But then these days, anyone with a pension pot is being screwed every which way till loose...

You can bet your bottom dollar that those behind the bid don't want to see the value of patent portfolios go down. They think that their own portfolios should be worth UltraBucks or perhaps more. No here they just see the chance of getting a bargain. Protecting themselves against being the target of trolls, but even more importantly using this little pile as a weapon to stop any upstart^H^H^H^H^H^H startups from coming along and having the temerity to try getting into their cosy little business niche.

Samsung grabs 'World's biggest handset-maker' title off Nokia

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Re: That much!

> I am surprised they got 16% - who buys a Nokia phone these days?

Anyone who wants a phone for less than £10 for the kids to put in the bottom of their school bag for when they miss the bus and you don't want the Mrs worrying about what the little monsters are up to now.

Rude web trolls should NOT be jailed, warns prosecution chief

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Trollface

Don't jaill web trolls

We don't have enough prisons

ITU to treaty haters: Enjoy your pricey roaming, boatloads of spam... suckers

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Re:Why exactly do people trust Google more than the ITU?

Who ever said I was trusting Google?

My point was that the ITU claiming they can do anything about SPAM is just total B*&^%cks. They have a track record in setting up treaties for the worlds phone systems and those treaties have no history what so ever of successfully stopping the barrage of unsolicited and frequently fraudulent nuisance phone calls that disturb our lives.

Given this track record why should we believe they are in any position to do anything about email SPAM?

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SPAM

As far as I know the ITU is involved in running the worlds phone systems. When they can stamp out the phone SPAM then they can start on the Internet stuff.

UK.gov backs away from ISP level filtering plan to protect kids

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Re: Or, to put it another way

The "we're totally clueless" argument might highlight the truth, but has never stop the gubberment taking aim at both of its feet in the past.

I think the more likely explanation is that someone has pointed out that all the false positives are going to cost them lots of real money. Even if they don't get sued they'll spend their lives having to chase around verifying objections. But of course they would get sued. There would be a constant stream of companies pursuing their arses all the way to the European courts of daft decisions.

All very expensive

But the lawyers would love it.

If they mandate it, then they own the problem.

Apple loses iPhone patent lawsuit

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Joke

Re: Bet Apple appeals

> (Bet Apple appeals - tainted jury, etc., etc,)

What you mean flagrantly copy Samsung

Review: Samsung Series 9 super slim notebook

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Re: 1600x900

To be honest I don't give a s*&t about aspect ratio, I care about having a reasonable number of lines of dots on the screen.

1080 might be fine for people who only want to watch movies, but I want to get some work done on this screen.

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Mushroom

Re: 1920x1200

My 10 year old Dull Inspiron 8500 had 1920x1200 on an 15" laptop. OK it was a brick to lug around but the screen was great.

Anything less than 1920x1200 should be classified as LoRes.

1280x1024 became the standard screen res in about 1987/88 didn't it. Please can we have some progress somewhere.

Perhaps manufactures should be forced to quote a MegaPixel rating so that Joe public understands just how shit most modern screens are.

Linux kernel dumps 386 chip support

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Re: 386, what about the 4040?

You mean you don't have the Haynes manual for the Saturn 5?

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Re: MS (and presumably Apple) long ago learnt the true value of drivers, API stability, etc.

Argh, that might explain why no one ever had any problems moving from XP to Vista then.

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Re: At that speed Windows 3.1 did not disgrace itself.

Well not with typists of the one fingered variety perhaps. But the screen couldn't keep up with even my own random 10 fingered crawl across the keys let alone any moderately competent typist. I remember having to talk to quite a number of secretaries who were being driven up the wall by how much time it would take to catch up with them.

Deputy PM: Rip up Snoop Charter, 'go back to the drawing board'

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@Tom38

So you feel that it is proportionate to have every website site you've ever visited, including the millions that you've never heard of but your PC has probably wondered off too, recorded in a form which can easily be searched by large numbers of people.

Perhaps you'd like to post the logs yourself?

This bill is like arguing that fitting CCTV cameras in every child in the countries bedroom would help reduce the cases of child abuse.

Apple's iOS 6 maps STILL muddle Mildura

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Joke

Maybe Cupertino man didn't realise

That down under the Sun's in the wrong place.

Really buggers up all sense of direction for us Northern Hemisphere types.

'Facebook is completely undreamt of even by the worst spying nation'

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Facepalm

Upside down

I sat through a presentation on Monte Carlo simulations of the charges within the gate of a transistor once. The scientist giving the presentation talked about 1 slide of apparently random dots for over twenty minutes before apologising that he'd got the slide upside down.

Brilliant but scatty

GPU-stuffed monster cracks Windows passwords in minutes

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Leaks ?

Can't the hashes be pulled off the network?

A security manager I was training once showed me a script kiddies tool which he plugged into our training network, arp spoofed to receive the traffic on the switched network and then slurped the fileshare traffic. The screen quickly showed the user name info of lots of people on the network then running something akin to "John" would slowly show all the guessable passwords (ie 95%)

Nearly as much fun as nfsshell

Apple shares take biggest one-day hammering in 4 years

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Bugger, make that double bugger

Didn't buy Apple shares on the way up

Didn't short them from the peak.

Frenchmen's sperm plunges by a third in quality and quantity since '89

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Re: Internet usage up, tadpoles down.

> Wrong, masturbation makes sperm fresher.

Might make that fresher, but it means there are less of the little buggers around when the lady with the rubber gloves comes to take a sample.

Einstein almost tagged dark energy in the early 1920s

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Re: But what about the cat?

Ah, but can one cat simultaneously exit two bags in two different rooms?

And does this experiment scale beyond 9?

Children increasingly named after Apple products

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Re: In the UK ...

Changing names at school (where the kids are most likely to want to lose the dump handle their parents have dumped them with) teachers will insist on using the name on the register and that will be the official name needed to register the little darling in the first place.

I know a couple who had to deed poll their 5 year old because he hated the name his parents gave him on his birth certificate (a normal name) and wanted to be called by the name his brothers and sisters had always used for him.

I didn't seem to matter how many times the parents wrote to the teacher and the school they insisted on using his official name, or a normal shortened form. It was only when they officially changed his name would the school take notice.

Chinese buyers falling out of love with iPhones

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Re: Cost

> The average Chinese worker can't afford the iPhone without selling a kidney,

While that is no doubt true, there is a bigger reason highlighted in the article.

> the fact its handsets won’t work with dominant local carriers.

Might also be a deciding factor.

There is only so much posing you can do, like the people you used to often see talking on their phone on the Underground in London, back when mobiles were " for the rich elite" here, rather than things you buy to give to the kids to chuck into the bottom of their school bag in case they can't get on the bus.

US software firm hacked for years after suing China

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Joke

Re: Good old green dam!

I tried Googling "youth escort" and could find anything about security

Apple manufacturers: ARRGH, pesky iThings are impossible to make

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The manufactures are loosing money on every unit

Bet Apple aren't though

K'ching

Apple sticks finger in dyke, cuts off Dutch flood of Galaxy S, SII, Ace

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Galaxy SII

Mine's been running Android 4 for yonks, surely they'd just import them with the newer SW installed.

A tweet too far: UK contempt law reform push begins

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Re: One of the reasons I would probably deny any jury duty

You can't deny jury duty

You are summoned by the court and you'd bloody well better be there or they'll treat you more harshly than most of the muggers, violent thugs and burglars that you'd get to hear tried.

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Contempt

The main thing about courts and contempt is that the court system and judges in particular need to stop treating jurors with contempt.

Courts routinely piss around with the lives of those unfortunate enough to be summoned to appear at Her Majesty's pleasure. Sure our legal system relies upon jurors and can not function without them. They should therefore be accorded due respect.

Employees might be legally entitled to be paid while on jury service, but those who work for themselves are entitled to such a miserable pittance in compensation, and then most drudgingly.

But once on jury service the judge and call and dismiss you for the slightest reason. Barrister wants to go home early? sure no problem, the slaves in the box can come back tomorrow, after all barristers are important. Lawyer's not turned up yet. No problem, make the jurors wait.

Courts that fail to treat with Jurors with respect should be fined massively, lets face it, the jury could always find them guilty of something.

Girlfriend 'tried to MURDER ME with her AMPLE BREASTS'

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"Treasure - I wanted your death to be as pleasurable as possible."

Sound like the young man didn't have a sense of humour,

what else was the lady supposed to say,

well apart from sorry.

Venus EXPOSED in predawn threesome with Saturn and Mercury

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Facepalm

Re: And according to....

Hey clouds have horoscopes too.

Apple versus Samsung: everything infringes everything

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Re: "neither vendor appears to hold a patent for the kitchen sink"

My kitchen sink is rectangular with rounded corners.

Does that mean some Apple lawyer should have to come round and wash my dishes?

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