* Posts by Will Godfrey

3389 posts • joined 8 Sep 2007

The Reg parts ways with imagineer and thought pathfinder Steve Bong

Will Godfrey
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Happy

So

Did Bong take a Bung?

Hungry minds need to know.

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Amazon Key door-entry flaw: No easy fix to stop rogue couriers burgling your place unseen

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

Duh!

So not only was it a crap idea to start with, it was crap implementation as well.

So, Amazon. Get stuffed.

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DJI bug bounty NDA is 'not signable', say irate infosec researchers

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

Fools

It's almost as if DJI want researchers to go dark.

Perhaps they also want to go out of business when the bad guys get to work using all the bugs that nobody would now be telling them about.

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Automatic for the people: Telcos forced to pay for giving you crap services

Will Godfrey
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Meh

Well, it's a start I suppose

But what about all the random disconnects, when they claim there is no fault and it must be my hardware?

Odd that it happens with two modems of different manufacture and different vintage.

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BOFH: But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?

Will Godfrey
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Wow!

The lions sleeping with a lamb.

I'm shocked! Truly shocked!!

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Boffins: We can identify you by your typing, and we're gonna sell the tech to biz, govt – yay!

Will Godfrey
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One way out

If I'm being at all verbose I've got into the habit of typing it out in a text editor, proofing it then just copy/pasting it into the website's input field.

I wonder what their thingy makes of that!

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Intel's super-secret Management Engine firmware now glimpsed, fingered via USB

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

Doh!

Put that into any spy story and everyone would have said you were being totally unrealistic...

but that was yesterday.

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Jupiter flashes pulsating southern pole, boffins understandably baffled

Will Godfrey
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Alien

The Answer

Jupiter is obviously a relay station for intergalactic communications.

A.C. Clarke was almost right. {Actually he knew the whole story, but signed an NDA}

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You're designing an internet fridge. Should you go for fat HTML or a Qt-pie for your UI?

Will Godfrey
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Mushroom

If you're designing an Internet fridge...

keep well away from me.

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UK.gov joins Microsoft in fingering North Korea for WannaCry

Will Godfrey
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WTF?

Wait!

I thot it was s'posed to be the Ruskies wot dun it.

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Interstellar space rock screams through Solar System

Will Godfrey
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Alien

Re: Rendevous with Rama

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

The Ramans always do things in threes.

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The UK's super duper 1,000mph car is being tested in Cornwall

Will Godfrey
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Re: Love them

Car:

Originally a contraction of 'Motorised Carriage'.

It's a carriage of a sort.

It's motorised in a way.

Its a car.

It's also rather a lot of FUN

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Apple vs. Samsung to climb back into rounded rectangle of justice

Will Godfrey
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Re: Having the damages severely reduced on appeal could benefit Apple

At this rate our grandchildren will still be buying the popcorn.

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Knock, knock? Oh, no one there? No problem, Amazon will let itself in via your IoT smart lock

Will Godfrey
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Facepalm

Upset now

So many commentards already covered what I wanted to say!

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Forget One Windows, Microsoft says it's time to modernize your apps

Will Godfrey
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WTF?

Time to dig out an old joke

The Standard Brush

Clearly there is only the need to purchase one general-purpose brush. This can be manufactured to the lowest common denominator design so that it can adequately perform all of the following functions:

Clean floors

Remove cobwebs

Brush teeth

Groom dog/cat

Unblock drains

Brush suit

Dust kitchen surfaces

Clean toilet

Clear leaves from gutters

Brush hair

I just can't understand why people don't seem to accept such an obviously practical suggestion. Although I agree the 'standard profile brush' may not actually be ideal for any of these tasks, I can't seem to convince people of the convenience factor and ease-of-use benefits.

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Happy New Year! Love, Microsoft: Price rises? Aw, you shouldn't have

Will Godfrey
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Unhappy

Wow! What a surprise

... not.

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AMD sales soar, actually makes a profit, beats expectations, share price... decimated

Will Godfrey
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Alien

Tinfoil Hat Time

It's almost as if someone in high places doesn't want AMD to succeed so tries to destabilise their financial position.

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Phone crypto shut FBI out of 7,000 devices, complains chief g-man

Will Godfrey
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7000?

So they had no problems snooping the other gazillion.

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Windows 10 Fall Creators Update tackles IT's true menace: Cheating gamers

Will Godfrey
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Thumb Up

Re: Windows 10 Fall

@ Phill

Exactly my thought!

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Survey: Tech workers are terrified they will be sacked for being too old

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Re: Our generation

really?

You look good for a 75yo

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ARM chip OG Steve Furber: Turing missed the mark on human intelligence

Will Godfrey
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Pint

Re: Marvellous

... and a crate for Steve Furber's team.

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You're doing open source wrong, Microsoft tsk-tsk-tsks at Google: Chrome security fixes made public too early

Will Godfrey
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Meh

Sometimes it's impossible

I do some work on a relatively small project. If I post a bugfix to github/sourceforge I have no way of compelling the distros to update as well.

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Brit intel fingers Iran for brute-force attacks on UK.gov email accounts

Will Godfrey
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Unhappy

The scary bit

Not the claim, but that 90% of the population will believe it.

P.S. I made up that 90% figure.

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Way-NO, Waymo! Judge snubs demand for Uber's robo-taxi code

Will Godfrey
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Meh

Guess I picked the wrong month...

... to give up popcorn.

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Sounds painful: Audio code bug lets users, apps get root on Linux

Will Godfrey
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Meh

Really?

I see there's that magic word 'local'.

I shall proceed to not panic.

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Has Git ever driven you so mad you wanted to bomb it? Well, now you can with this tiny repo

Will Godfrey
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Linux

Storm? Teacup?

Well, as a relatively casual user I've not had any problems so far.

SVN however...

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US Congress mulls first 'hack back' revenge law. And yup, you can guess what it'll let people do

Will Godfrey
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Pah!

Against man's politicians' stupidity the gods themselves, contend in vain.

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Night out in London tonight: Beer, Reg and platform wars

Will Godfrey
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WTF?

Are you me?

That is almost word-for-word what I might have written.

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BOFH: Oh dear. Did someone get lost on the Audit Trail?

Will Godfrey
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Happy

A thing of beauty

See title.

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Twitter: Why we silenced Rose McGowan after she slammed alleged sex pest Harvey Weinstein

Will Godfrey
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Angel

Erm...

Wherefore art this twit-err of which thou speakest?

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North Korean hackers allegedly probing US utilities for weaknesses

Will Godfrey
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Angel

But of course...

None of the 'free world'(tm) countries are doing such things. That would be terribly anti-democratic wouldn't it?

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Top of the radio charts: Jodrell Bank goes for UNESCO World Heritage status

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Re: Quasers?

I fink yer rite

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Rejecting Sonos' private data slurp basically bricks bloke's boombox

Will Godfrey
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Meh

Not for me.

Portable battery radio in the kitchen - late 1960s.

Home built tunar-amp + mid-fi speakers in the office - mid 1970s.

Serious quality tuner-amp + dual capstan cassette recorded + full size ported speakers in the lounge - mid 1980s

Additional DVD/CD player for lounge - early 1990s.

All in fine condition and in daily use... and nobody gets any information at all about our use.

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Give us cash and think about the kids, UK tells Facebook and Twitter

Will Godfrey
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Quite Transparent

They've linked 'Think of the children.' to 'We want more money.'

Presumably they've given up on boat houses in duck ponds and renting out second homes while getting paid for them by us.

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Sole Equifax security worker at fault for failed patch, says former CEO

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

A sort of inverted honesty

He has just proved beyond all possible doubt that he is a lying weasel.

I doubt even a 5 year old would try to pull something like that and expect to be believed.

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Home Sec Amber Rudd: Yeah, I don't understand encryption. So what?

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

Little Miss Amber

... and if I don't get my way I'll thqueam an' thqueam until I'm thick.

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Forget the 'simulated universe', say boffins, no simulator could hit the required scale

Will Godfrey
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FAIL

Can't be done?

Insufferable arrogance.

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Ouch: Brit council still staggering weeks after ransomware bit its PCs

Will Godfrey
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Big Brother

Hmmm

I wonder if there is a particularly contentions planning application in progress. Not that I'm suggesting anyone would use this to slow things down a wee bit while they consolidate their position.

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Vibrating walls shafted servers at a time the SUN couldn't shine

Will Godfrey
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Been there done that

New industrial control unit sited within inches of the main three phase bus-bars for the entire factory (hidden behind a thin partition). Our first clue was when we heard people's phones didn't work in that area and an engineers laptop kept freezing, but was fine everywhere else.

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Microsoft downplays alarm over Windows Defender 'flaw'

Will Godfrey
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Re: *Boatload*

Doh. There is no trailing 'ne' in fuckton - that's a bit of French affectation reserved for Metric measures.

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Patch alert! Easy-to-exploit flaw in Linux kernel rated 'high risk'

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Patched

Now, next question?

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Behold iOS 11, an entirely new computer platform from Apple

Will Godfrey
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Angel

Well it took the rest of the world long enough to (nearly) catch up with proper font scaffolding and sub pixel hinting, so something as incredibly arcane as app->app, app->file, file->app d&d was bound to take longer.

P.S. bet they still got it wrong.

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Equifax fooled again! Blundering credit biz directs hack attack victims to parody site

Will Godfrey
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Unhappy

Re: Both domains went dark ?

Been in that position too. It's hopeless. the only thing you can do is wait years for the erroneous entry to become stale.

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Quebec takes mature approach to 'grilled cheese' ban

Will Godfrey
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Oh c'mon now

You lot are really milking this.

Could even say you're churning it up.

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AI slurps, learns millions of passwords to work out which ones you may use next

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Well...

kopundic

magporwistic

zottenburg

libnocrup

Try your AI on those for starters.

P.S. I don't use any of them.

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RIP Stanislav Petrov: Russian colonel who saved world from all-out nuclear war

Will Godfrey
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Still they pontificate

With all the knowledge and experience of systems that are supposed to be faultless yet do go wrong the politicians and generals think this can be winnable.

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Just how are HMRC’s IT systems going to cope with Brexit?

Will Godfrey
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Unhappy

I have total confidence in our illustrative HMRC

No, that's not a typo. I'm sure they will illustrate exactly what happens when you combine (at least) two major, rapidly changing unknowns into a single project, that nobody has a clue how to implement within the required, unspecified but shortening timeframe.

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'All-screen display'? But surely every display is all-screen... or is a screen not a display?

Will Godfrey
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Unhappy

Re: Playing with fire, Dabbsy?

Wireless charging, the most inefficient, and unreliable way of achieving the desired result.

Sorry, forgot. It's apple we're talking about.

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BOFH: We're only here because they said there would be biscuits

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Re: This...!

keep away! That Avada is a real bitch!

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Python explosion blamed on pandas

Will Godfrey
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Happy

Hmm

So, pandering to the audience.

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