* Posts by ratfox

3442 posts • joined 3 Sep 2007

Apple rejects crazy canuck's seal bludgeon game

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Pint

This is inconsistent indeed, but...

The whole society is inconsistent in this precise manner. Nothing to do with Apple, really.

In fact, Apple is rather consistent in the sense that they are inconsistent at all times.

IT consultant gets 5 years for plundering $2m

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Pint

Good that he got caught

But actually, I wonder why crooks like these do not escape before getting caught.

Or maybe we only get to hear about those that did not escape...

New drug spray 'makes men as soppy as girls'

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Thumb Down

Sexist

Show me Cute Overload any day, and I will coo and blubber too!

SCO: jurors too busy Facebooking to rule on Unix claim

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WTF?

Incredible

- No

- We want a bench trial!

- No

- We want a jury!

- No

- We want another jury... or a bench trial again... anything!

- What *** part of NO don't you understand??

SCO should get a soap opera award.

Microsoft's Linux patent bingo hits Google's Android

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Flame

Revolting

Basically, Microsoft can lean on about any company in the world, and say:

"We think that maybe you owe us money. Now there's the easy way, and that is very easy. You pay a license fee, and that's the end of it.

Of course, you can also try the hard way. We have plenty of lawyers. We have plenty of money and we think nothing of a ten-years long legal battle, which would take 50% of your resources, and 0.1% of ours. Now which will it be?"

Schoolyard bully... On the other hand, Vetinari would be proud.

California's 'Zero Energy House' is actually massive fossil hog

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Boffin

Not quite

124 miles/Gallon would be about 1.897 litres per 100km.

The proper Yank unit for 3 litres per 100km is 78.4 miles/Gallon

Even if you mean the ol' Imperial Gallon instead of the Yank one,

it would still mean 2.278 litres per 100km, not 3.

Cops raid Gizmodo editor in pursuit of iPhone 4G 'felony'

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Pint

Well, Gizmodo wins too

Gizmodo is getting advertisement like never before, and I am sure that Jason Chen himself is not regretting for a minute whatever it was that he did. As an aspirant journalist, he will likely consider it as a badge of honor. I doubt very much he will end up in jail, especially since he did eventually give back the iPhone.

Scammers plunder gullible iPad owners' backdoors

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Paris Hilton

lot of disposable income and not much sense...

I suppose PH bought one?

Kent police bring obscenity charge over online chat

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FAIL

What about mangas?

Many mangas talk of killing children. Say, Naruto. It contains multiple occurrences of attempts on the lives of underage teenagers.

Microsoft wins big in Chinese piracy lawsuit

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Irrational? Not so much...

After all, since they can find people who actually buy it... Why not?

I am willing to bet that somebody at Microsoft made estimations, for each pricing, of how many people would buy versus would pirate it. And they put the price where they thought they would earn the most MONEY. Actually quite reasonable.

Adobe gives up on the iPhone

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The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

All right, I think I get it. Apple does not want apps based on Flash, because it would flood the iTunes stores with apps of "lower quality of experience" that would bring down the level of apps as a whole.

Fair enough, I guess. There may be 100'000 apps already, but there are millions of Flash games. And it would certainly be a let-down if people start saying that apps are just like flash games on the web, except you need to pay for them.

...Of course, that might be ignoring the fart apps, but I do get that if you have a very rosy-colored view of what an app should be, you might turn up your nose at flash games.

ratfox Silver badge
WTF?

Why not do a code translator?

Is it that hard to make a pre-compiler that would read a flash app and output the equivalent in Objective-C code? Is Apple going to study every code and try to guess whether it was translated or not? Silly me, of course Apple would. But would they really be able to tell the difference? There is no end to the obfuscation you could go to in order to make it look like a human being typed the code from scratch.

I can imagine Apple starting to randomly refuse apps because they look like they might have been translated...

Space Station lightsabre-sparring hoverdroids to be upgraded

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Paris Hilton

power transfer through resonant inductive coupling

Oh, is that how you youngsters are calling it these days? *snigger*

PH of course

Microsoft stealth launches 'historic' programming language

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Conciseness

Maybe it's me, but conciseness does not mean readability, or even fast development. E.g. Perl can be very concise too

School secretly snapped 1000s of students at home

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FAIL

Heads are gonna roll...

Hard to believe they thought they could do this

Italian toads predicted L'Aquila earthquake

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FAIL

Revoke their biology license

It's astonishing that somebody could publish such a load of bull (toad) crap.

Repeat after me: Correlation is not causation.

Taiwanese chip co asks ITC to ban iPad imports

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TItle

Insert standard rant against patents.

Steve Jobs spotted not hating Eric Schmidt

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Thumb Up

I can only admire these people

I wonder how it feels to know that world+dog is following your steps, and to calculate each of your appearances to that level. Steve Jobs could probably give lessons to the most media-savvy movie star.

I think it was their wives. Must be.

Steve Jobs and governator tout transplant reform

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Anyway, good for him

I don't begrudge him his good luck, no matter how much his money may have played a role.

Honestly, I can't even bring myself to claim it is unfair.

ratfox Silver badge

So how come he was chosen?

Not that I claim he should have gracefully let somebody go in front of him. I certainly would spend quite a bit of money in order to survive. Not very moral, but certainly normal...

'The LHC will implode the Moon or PUT OUT THE SUN'

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Joke

Good, good!

This should allow us to put an end to global warming!

Computer glitch prompts 50 raids on elderly couple's home

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Coat

Sounds good to me

Where do they live? Do they have money in their home?

Mine's the one with the Saturday night special in the pocket

Twitter bomb hoax man changes plea

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Black Helicopters

Pushing our luck, aren't we?

Better call your lawyer now, the choppers are closing in...

Battle lines drawn in Apple-Google warfare

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Coffee/keyboard

Merger?

You owe me a new keyboard!

'Crazy' man cuffed for plotting cyber extortion scheme

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Paris Hilton

Moron

Title says it all really. How could he think that he would get away with it?

Even Paris would not.

Microsoft's dual-screen booklet shows 'face' on web

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Jobs Halo

Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery

It is a measure of the respect Apple commands, that there are me-too copies of its products being drafted even before the original is on sale. Even the Reg is writing about iPad killers before the iPad is actually successful...

Halo Steve, because whatever you think of Apple, it is impressive

Man of God backs Beverley porncoder

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Flame

Trying to knock down the competition

Obviously, the rag is worried that people might read his website rather than their stories...

Forget SETI, this is how you find aliens: Hefty prof speaks

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Thumb Up

Title is "Victory Unintentional"

By Isaac Asimov

How FBI, police busted massive botnet

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Actually, it is a fair comment

Sure, there are over 200 countries in the world, but I would have guessed that a third of them did not have much computer infrastructure...

So more than 190 countries really means that the botnet infiltrated computers almost everywhere.

Authorities dismantle botnet with 13 million infected PCs

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Thumb Up

I think the bigger point is

They got caught. Unless botnet creators operate from countries where law enforcement is lax, or where they have ties to the government, they still have a high chance of getting caught.

I count that as good news.

Apple kicks out quack app, keeps boobs/farts

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Coffee/keyboard

ROFL

Apple owes me a new keyboard, for allowing the pic on the left, but not that on the right

Parallels fondles Steve Jobs' bare metal

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Paris Hilton

Is this still a virtual machine??

How is it virtual? When it runs on a machine without OS, shouldn't it be called an OS?

What is next, a cloud storage service that you run on your local computer?

PH, because she is not virtual either.

Microsoft: Oracle will take us back to 1970s hell

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Thumb Up

Ahhh, the 60s

When computers were real computers...

Seriously, Microsoft might be right about part of this. Probably, Oracle are hoping to get something like the vice-like grip Apple has on its customer base.

And say what you want about Microsoft, but PCs do offer more choice than Apple. (Mac user, don't flame)

Large Hadron Collider in multi-magnet quench hiccup

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Paris Hilton

Rube Goldberg was a beginner

When you think of the complexities involved just in quenching the system...

PH, because she is much simpler to figure out

Apple prepping 'Explicit' App Store?

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Thumb Down

I can understand the developers

It is already hard when your business is scrapped in a day, but this really feels like Apple is just yanking their chain.

US school comes out fighting over webcam spy claim

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Paris Hilton

More details

1) it was a macbook, so no jokes about Windows security. The school had admin rights on the laptops, not the students.

2) The family lawyer says he was seen popping candies named Mike-N-Ike. The school evidently believed it was drugs.

3) I can't believe they thought they could get away with it.

Even PH wouldn't be this stupid...

Swiss prostitutes armed with defibrillators

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Paris Hilton

How sad to die on a co... concub...

cucumber sandwich...

SNIFF

(Am I really the first with a PH icon?)

Google typosquat cash pegged at $497m per year

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Is it significant?

Honestly, I wonder. Compared to all the cash that Google earns, how significant these typosquatters are?

This is not unlike accusing a store of not turning away dodgy-looking customers, even though they probably stole the money they are paying with...

Twitter 'airport bomb hoax twit' charged

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Dead Vulture

Why call it a bomb hoax?

Come on, Reg, this is not a hoax! A hoax is meant to be believed.

Do not feed the trollicemen!

Schmidt denies Google wants 'dumb pipe' carriers

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Paris Hilton

I want dumb pipes too!

I understand that Schmidt has to be political, but really, most of us want operators to be dumb pipes. And the operators have been fighting this since Hush-a-phone.

PH... pipes... dumb...

Apple bans iPhone hackers from App Store

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Jobs Horns

How petty can you get?

And if you try to talk to us, we will stick our fingers in our ears, and sing loudly LA-LA-LA CAN'T HEAR YOU...

I like Apple in general, but this is ridiculous.

Can $100m a year keep Google on the iPhone?

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Unhappy

Calculator please

"A two-one-hundredths per cent drop in revenue would hardly be noticed..."

Actually 100 millions is twenty hundredths per cent of 50 billions.

A two-one-hundredths per cent would be 10 millions.

I can only hope that my finances ever get to the point that such a

difference would be unnoticeable...

'Electronic fags' are useless - US prof's startling claim

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Coffee/keyboard

Electronic fags are useless? eButts don't work as advertised?

Took me a while, between the fags and butts...

Who cares? As long as people are happy puffing them.

US judges leave definition of obscenity to Amish, Kansas

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Paris Hilton

What if the web site is in the cloud?

What if I publish something on Google sites? Heck if I know where the server is based... And for all I know, the actual emplacement might change every couple of days!

PH is in the clouds, too...

Street View catches Finn with his pants down

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Cheap

In the US, the guy would ask for millions and millions of dollars...

Microscope-wielding boffins crack cordless phone crypto

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Sweet mother of Bejeesus

Some people actually reverse-engineer microchips... 0_o

For me 20 years seems good enough... Considering it still needs a fair bit of computational power even now, the attack would hardly have been practical until recently.

Google doppelgänger casts riddle over interwebs

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We should do riddles about this

How do you call a blog whose only purpose is to register the self-congratulation of its author (i.e. pretty much all of them)?

Answer: Ego Log

What do you call what is left of somebody amputated by a train?

Answer: Leg goo

What do you say to a witch from the Lancre coven, just after she escaped from a charging bull?

Answer: Olé, Ogg!

What do you call an object from the Microsoft Component Object Model containing an open source codec?

Answer: .ogg OLE

etc. etc. etc.

Sci-fi and fantasy authors wade into Amazon spat

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Stop

Price difference between e-books and real books

Newflash: Books also cost next to nothing to produce. Most of the price pays for the edition job, paying an artist for the cover, typesetting, etc. A $20 book costs 50 cents to print. Even with transportation costs, you barely get $2 of price for the physical object; the rest is for content.

And as Ryan said, e-books are not "free" to distribute either...

US gov's emptying of vast Texan helium-tank dome 'wrong'

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Coat

Cheap shot

That's the problem with Helium... If it was just oil, the US would just burn everything as fast as possible, but since Helium does not burn, they have to get rid of this non-renewable resource SOMEhow...

Mine's with Evil Merkins for dummies in the pocket...

Climategate witchhunt fingers scientist

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Big Brother

My God

21) What is your opinion on thought police?

Surely a Big Brother Icon is needed here if it ever was...

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