* Posts by Clive Galway

384 posts • joined 15 Feb 2007

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Google to cough up $20m after Chrome rips off anti-malware patents

Clive Galway

Litigation from beyond the grave?

The patents [...] were awarded to former Lucent engineer Allen Rozman, who died aged 52 in 2012, and Alfonso J. Cioffi, both of Texas*, who filed suit [PDF] against Google in 2013.

Allen Rozman came back from the dead to patent troll Google?

I thought the patent situation in Texas was bad, but not that bad.

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Northumbria Uni fined £400K after boffin's bad math gives students a near-killer caffeine high

Clive Galway
FAIL

Tasteless statement

"Luckily for them and for everyone they were in the sort of physical shape that was able to deal safely with this large amount of caffeine"

No, their body was NOT able to "deal safely with this large amount of caffeine". They had to be taken to hospital.

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Congratulations – you're looking better than ever this morning!

Clive Galway

"much-embiggened" version

"and you can see a much-embiggened version here."

985x975? Hardly.

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Chevy Bolt electric car came alive, reversed into my workbench, says stunned bloke

Clive Galway
FAIL

I smell bullshit

"Besides, he noted, if he had failed to put it into park, the car would have rolled forward – not gone into reverse."

Look at the pictures. The front of the car MUST be pointing out of the garage, otherwise how else would he have gotten in? Therefore, the last gear he used was reverse, not forwards, so his statement is patently false.

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The top doc, the FBI, the Geek Squad informant – and the child porn pic that technically wasn't

Clive Galway
Stop

I call bullshit

"To be clear, our agents unintentionally find child pornography as they try to make the repairs the customer is paying for. They are not looking for it. Our policies prohibit agents from doing anything other than what is necessary to solve the customer’s problem"

"the image was pulled from unallocated space on Rettenmaier's hard drive"

Unless the customer is paying for file recovery, these two statements are fundamentally incompatible.

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Cache flush: AI poker bot to compete against top players in tourney

Clive Galway

Starcraft?

Surely an AI could gain a significant advantage over a human in terms of speed of play.

No human could issue orders as fast as an AI (Top SC players are blazingly fast, but not *that* fast), so I do not see this as a fair match - the decision making probably would not need to be that good, as the AI could micromanage every unit everywhere on the map simultaneously.

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Twas the week before Xmas ... not a creature was stirring – except Microsoft admitting its Windows 10 upgrade pop-up went 'too far'

Clive Galway

Re: Microsoft has been getting it wrong with user interfaces

You turn it off, you turn it on, fix the start menu, reboot a couple of times...

TFTFY

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Hackers electrocute selves in quest to turn secure doors inside out

Clive Galway

Re: Push The Button To Exit

"Which is one of the reasons good security doors require you to authenticate every time you open the door no matter which way you are transiting."

Aren't there laws against that? Doesn't sound very safe to me.

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TfL to track Tube users in stations by their MAC addresses

Clive Galway

Anyone care to explain how a MAC can be "de-personalised"?

Yeah, right, hash the MACs and call it "de-personalised", that's not gonna help you if the spooks already know your MAC and the algo it was hash with.

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Tesla to charge for road trip 'leccy, promises it will cost less than petrol

Clive Galway

So your typos now extend to using L33+5P33k ?

The company will now offer new buyers credits for 400 kWh of electricity, which translat3s to about 1,600km (1,000 miles) of driving each year.

Seriously, do you even USE a spellchecker?

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Tesco Bank limits online transactions after fraud hits thousands

Clive Galway

Fail

"In the meantime it has suspended online transactions from current accounts, including contactless transactions"

Translation: "We fucked up, but we are putting the hurt on our customers to minimize our losses".

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It's ALIVE: Juno back online after reboot

Clive Galway

Figures sound wrong

3.6 kg of fuel to change velocity by 5.8 mph? That sounds horrifically inefficient!

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Vodafone rapped with RECORD £4.6m fine for failing customers

Clive Galway
FAIL

The Regsitter proofreader strikes again

What is it with El Reg these days and mangled opening sentences in articles?

For a rag whose stock in trade is poking fun at companies who fail at the most basic of tasks, you sure do seem to have a serious problem with this most basic of tasks.

"Vodafone has been fined £4.6m for failing customers for mis-selling to customers"

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Uber's robo-truck makes first delivery of ... Budweiser in Colorado

Clive Galway

Otto was also the name of the autopilot in Airplane!

Which, as any fule kno, is the funniest film ever made, bar none. RIP Leslie Nielsen

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New Brit Hubble analysis finds 2,000 billion galaxies, 10x previous count

Clive Galway

Heard of this new thing called Proof-reading?

I have heard it is rather good.

10x previous count.Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly hugely mindbogglingly big it is Douglas Adams was right. Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly hugely mindbogglingly big it is

Plus messed up HTML at the end.

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BT Yahoo! customers: Why! can't! we! grrr! delete! our! webmail! accounts!?

Clive Galway

Yeah, cos forwarding is gonna help you

"The customer said BT/Yahoo! had also made it impossible for BT customers to configure the forwarding of emails to a third party address from their BT Yahoo addresses."

If you think all the emails are being read, then exactly how do you think configuring a forwarder is gonna help you?

The mind truly boggles.

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Lenovo denies claims it plotted with Microsoft to block Linux installs

Clive Galway

Re: "To improve system performance, Lenovo is ... adopting RAID on the SSDs..."

From the product page:

Storage: Up to 1 TB SSD

And yeah, it may have eSATA ports, but it's an ULTRABOOK.

Who buys an ultrabook and then lugs around an external RAID enclosure?

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Clive Galway
FAIL

"To improve system performance, Lenovo is ... adopting RAID on the SSDs..."

From the Reddit thread:

"I got a reply from Lenovo on my Best Buy review about why the BIOS on my Yoga 900 ISK2 UltraBook has been set to stop people from using Linux."

Specs for the Yoga 900 ISK2:

http://shop.lenovo.com/us/en/laptops/yoga/900-series/yoga-900-13/#tab-tech_specs

It's a laptop with ONE DRIVE BAY.

So what possible benefit would putting SSD RAID on a laptop with one drive bay bring?

Pull the other one, it's got bells on.

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EU ends anonymity and rules open Wi-Fi hotspots need passwords

Clive Galway
FAIL

Utterly unworkable

If you require a passport or whatever for user #1 to use the WiFi, what is stopping user #2 from getting the WiFi password from user #1? One-time passwords etc? Well that is unfair on the smaller shops that cannot afford to pay for the kit that would support such a solution.

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Is there paper in the printer? Yes and it's so neatly wrapped!

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's... er, Graphene bubbles – 200 times stronger than Superman

Clive Galway
Stop

Ekaterina Khestanova, a PhD student who performed the experiments, believes the pressurised bubbles could be used to prevent liquids from freezing.

"Such pressures are enough to modify the properties of a material trapped inside the bubbles and, for example, can force crystallization of a liquid well above its normal freezing temperature," she said

Eh? Isn't she saying the exact opposite? Sounds to me like she is saying you can get it to freeze at a higher temperature.

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The Internet of Cows is moo-ving fast … no bull!

Clive Galway

Mating Control

Simples.

RFID controlled "chastity belts" for the females, activated by RFID chips mounted on the bellies of the males.

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Five-storey Blue Screen Of Death spotted in Thailand

Clive Galway

Re: It sucks when it's your bank's ATM...

And how are you in any different a situation to keeping your money buried?

At least if you keep it buried, you can withdraw 100% of it (Assuming nobody else found it that is). If the economy is that screwed that there is hyperinflation, chances are you wouldn't be able to get all your money out of the bank quickly enough (Too many queues, banks don't actually have everyone's deposits).

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League of lawsuits: Game developer sues cheat-toting website

Clive Galway

You simply cannot do all checks on all users at all times.

It is generally totally feasible to do SOME checks on all users all the time, and if those checks turn up something fishy, then increase the logging level for that account. Hell, you could even have human-initiated logging (Reporting of users).

Hell, you do not even need software to do this - a player gets reported via email, then an admin watches that player in a game, maybe even sends them messages ("Please respond to confirm you are actually at the keyboard")

So saying "We cannot solve this problem because it would impact performance for everyone" is a cheap cop-out.

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Brit network O2 hands out free Windows virus with USB pens

Clive Galway

Did they actually mention WHICH virus was on the pen in the email?

If not, woefully irresponsible.

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Clive Galway

Re: It's just PENetration testing

Surely looking in the mouth is the one thing you DO want to do with a gift trojan?

You might see the soldiers hiding inside if you did.

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SentinelOne's $1m ransomware guarantee dismissed as PR stunt

Clive Galway

Not a good marketing technique.

It encourages ransomware authors to infect any customer of SentinelOne, because they know the likelihood of getting paid is significantly higher, and they know exactly how much they can extract out of you.

It paints a huge "GET YOUR MILLION BUCKS HERE" shaped target on the back of all your customers.

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What's ordered in Vegas, doesn't stay in Vegas? $6.7m of printer ink 'stolen by office worker'

Clive Galway

Re: accounting 101 anyone

If a utility company is using inkjets to print all the bills, then that is the crime, right there.

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Governments Googling Google about you more than ever says Google

Clive Galway

Nation per 100,000 population

UK 10.2027338350

So 1 in 10,000 ? That's insane.

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Chatbot lawyer shreds $2.5m in parking tickets

Clive Galway

Re: A small omission?

So, by your definition, anything that is legal by the letter of the law is automatically morally and ethically right as well?

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Pastejack attack turns your clipboard into a threat

Clive Galway

Re: I think I'm safe, buuuut...

It is done in the browser. The exploit is javascript.

https://github.com/dxa4481/Pastejacking/blob/master/index.html

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Did Spotify hire Alan Partridge to run its Netflix-style video push?

Clive Galway

Queen for a day

Moustachio'd rocker Freddie Mercury and HRH The Queen swap places for a day.

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Apple assumes you'll toss the Watch after three years

Clive Galway
FAIL

"[iDevices] are typically used for four years before being Shut Down for the last time"

What part of "Years of use, which are based on first owners" do you not understand?

Three years is the figure they expect the original purchaser to own it, before selling it.

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Would you let cops give your phone a textalyzer scan after a road crash?

Clive Galway

Surely not possible to get accurate information without seizing the phone

How can they distinguish between you sending a message and an auto-responder sending a message?

The only way would be to have the device and check which apps / rules are running.

Hell, you could have even dictated a message, so fundamentally there would be no difference to holding a conversation.

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George Bush naked selfie hacker Guccifer gets his day in US court

Clive Galway
Coat

"Guccifer is accused of is broadcasting a painted self-portrait by former President George W Bush while naked in a shower and bath"

Naked hacking eh? He wants to watch out he doesn't drop the laptop into the water.

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Hands on with Xiaomi's Mi 5: Great smartphone, but when do we get it?

Clive Galway

Thin bezels - no thanks!

Apart from the mentioned usability issue, they are just too flimsy.

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Pilot posts detailed MS Flight Sim video of how to land Boeing 737

Clive Galway

"Use your feet to steer by pushing on the left or right pedal"

Pedantic much?

Foot pedals control yaw, and do basically the same thing as a steering wheel in a car or the handlebars on a bike.

So saying "Use your feet to steer by pushing on the left or right pedal" is putting it in simple terms that anyone familiar with cars or bikes (ie everyone) can understand.

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That's cute, Germany – China shows the world how fusion is done

Clive Galway

50 Million C?

The photo says 50, 000, 000 K

Is that not Kelvin?

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Firing a water rocket to 1km? Piece of cake

Clive Galway

Draw a graph of atmospheric pressure over altitude. Is the line straight or curved?

http://www.engineeringtoolbox.com/air-altitude-pressure-d_462.html

It's curved. Ergo, expending all your thrust at launch is not the most efficient way to gain altitude.

According to that graph, at 1km up (Which is how high the vehicle got), there is ~2.3% less pressure than at sea level.

"Using a lower acceleration means that you're wasting impulse lifting the remaining mass of your fuel for a longer time, hence you'll get a lower altitude. Blasting it out all at once means that more of that potential energy stored as pressure is used to push the vehicle alone, getting you to a higher altitude."

If you expend 100% of your fuel in the first 1% of altitude, it means that you have to travel the remaining 99% (Through the least efficient part of the graph) with no power at all, and that you have way less inertia. So expending all the fuel at the start is not all good - there are up-sides and down-sides.

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Clive Galway
Boffin

"featherweight record-breaking rocket that is 2.68m tall yet weighs less than 1.5kg"

"The rocket produced 550kg of thrust – enough to lift a small car off the ground – and blasted off to 550km/h in under 0.5 seconds"

I am guessing the 1.5kg weight is without fuel - even so, 0 - 550km/h in 0.5s sounds like way too fast too soon. Wouldn't you be better off distributing that thrust over a longer time? Are they not wasting a lot of DV trying to go too quickly through the atmosphere?

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Boffins baffled by record-smashing supernova that shouldn't exist

Clive Galway

"570 billion times brighter than our sun's output" ...Our sun's output over what time? 1 second? 1 year? its lifetime?

Oh my, that really needs explaining? If you omit such information from a comparison, the assumption is that you are comparing like for like.

The amount it outputs in x seconds is 570 million times more than our sun's output in x seconds.

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Live-streaming paper plane drone takes to the skies

Clive Galway

"Hot swap 550 mAh Lipo rechargable battery"

Hot swap??

I fail to see the point in a battery powered aitcraft being able to swap out batteries without turning off.

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Sneaky skimmer scam stings several Safeway supermarkets

Clive Galway

Trash your magstrip

If you are in a region that is in the process of moving from mag-strip to Chip+PIN, then once you are able to conduct your daily life without the magstrip, then trash the magstrip on your card!!

All the skimmers (AFAIK) clone magstrips. Even if you insert your card into a device that uses C+P, if it has a magstrip skimmer installed, then they have magstrip + PIN, which is enough to withdraw.

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Big Brother is born. And we find out 15 years too late to stop him

Clive Galway

Re: I have been radicalised.

While this may have been in jest, this may be a good way to hit back,

If everybody started discussing bomb plots with their mates, browsing Jihadist websites and generally trying to generate as many false positives as possible, they would become overwhelmed and may be forced to dial it back a notch or two.

ALLAHU ACKBAR!

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British woman loses £1.6 million to romance scam love rats

Clive Galway

"Victims of this fraud must understand that they are not foolish"

Getting scammed of a couple of hundred quid, maybe.

If you hand over £1.6m, then frankly you are more of a problem than the scammers. If there weren't twats like this woman around handing out such insane amounts of money, then the incentive wouldn't be as strong for people to become scammers.

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Apple's Watch charging pad proves Cupertino still screwing buyers

Clive Galway

Like they did with the USB charging standard?

And then Apple just stuck two fingers up at them and made it so that iDevices *could* charge from USB, but only with a proprietary adapter that does not ship with the product?

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Hey Cortana, how about you hide my app from the user?

Clive Galway

Dumbest idea ever

Have they even considered how this would work when everyone in the office is doing this at the same time?

It would be way too noisy and you can bet that your PC would occasionally pick up someone else's commands.

If it processes the commands without focusing the app, you may not even know that the sensitive spreadsheet you have on your PC was just emailed to all and sundry because the guy at the desk next to you tried to send an email to all users...

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BlackBerry Priv: Enterprise Android in a snazzy but functional package

Clive Galway
FAIL

Fail review

"The Priv looks conventional, but unfolds to reveal a QWERTY keyboard"

This is THE main differentiating feature, and you felt the need to include a whole page of pictures taken using the device, which is probably not a huge concern for the target audience.

Is there one pic of the keyboard though? No. Fail.

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Tiny Robot Smartphone: Invasion Earth 2016 – prepare to be facially recognised humans

Clive Galway

The question "Where the hell has my phone gotten to?" becomes a little more problematic when the bugger has legs!

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Anonymous UK 'leader' fined for revealing ID of rape complainant

Clive Galway

"Zip ties not long enough to go around wrists" defence

Am I missing something here? As long as you have enough zip ties, no length is too long - you just daisy chain them.

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