* Posts by Rhuadh

10 posts • joined 17 May 2018

Are you who you say you are, sir? You are? That's all fine then


Working in a call centre, for my sins, forgive me!

Over a period of some years working from being a startup operation, where no one had any real idea of organisation and we expected to take messages and spend a couple of hours unpaid after the phones had closed, to try and remember what was supposed to be done and mostly failing.

Then came the first scripts which had to be stuck to or face "a meeting with management", after a couple of months management realised that most callers had needs which weren't mentioned in the scripts, so they were quietly abandoned and the systems refined allowing a free flowing system to evolve. Then a new manager, and new scripts, followed by the dawning realisation that customers were not happy with the "new" experience and as we were in a high £ value environment, we went back to free flow. Government legislation next, and new scripts, which when somebody realised that most of the callers were on about totally different reasons and we went back to free flow. Then it dawned on senior management of the money making opportunities in pushing unnecessary products, which needed of course, a script, until the legal team advised it was not just immoral but severely, illegal.

Happily, I have now another job, before the robot system really got going, (bought from an Aussie pizza company and upgraded).

I couldn't possibly tell you the computer's ID over the phone, I've been on A Course™


Re: He should be proud that of that guy

Er! In 1939 the USA wasn't. You only joined in the fun on the 7th December 1941 - Late as usual...

Storied veteran Spitfire slapped with chrome paint job takes off on round-the-world jaunt



Don't know if anyone is interested, but the sponsor with the name in front of the cockpit is IWC Schaffhausen, (it's in Switzerland before anyone goes on about it). But surprisingly there is a WW2 connection. There were two great pre-war watch brands, IWC and Zenith. Zenith supplied the axis powers with watches and time pieces, while IWC supplied the allies. After the war, Zenith tried to get back into the UK watch market, but it took them many years as memories died hard. IWC on the other hand went upmarket - both companies are still in existence. And I still have my fathers, IWC chronograph watch from when he was a navigator in the RAF in WW2.

BOFH: Oh, go on, let's flush all that legacy tech down the toilet


Re: Outsourced?

Surely not to Crapita?

Giga-hurts radio: Terrorists build Wi-Fi bombs to dodge cops' cellphone jammers


Re: WiFi? Timers!

Aniseed Balls! No really, the original style made by repeatedly dipping forming multiple layers around a seed, rather than the more modern type. Used on magnetic mines, either to release from sea bed after the mine layer has departed the scene, or attached by divers to ships.

Put a stop to these damn robocalls! Dozens of US state attorneys general fire rocket up FCC's ass


Been here too long. Elderly parents getting over 40 scam calls a day, now since I got a Truecall unit, down to maybe 4 a week and those are set not to ring but given a chance to leave a message.

So how do these ba******ds get away with it. There is an international treaty where phone calls are guaranteed to get through from caller to callee, which dates from several decades ago. Back in those days, quite simply, nobody would have been able to believe how technology has "improved". To make it possible, the telephone companies each receive a micro payment for every call that passes through its system and into the next company. Many micropayments make major bucks.

While the technology does exist to block the spammers and scammers, obviously by some of the telephone companies selling boxes which do the work, until the governments around the world sit down and renogiate the treaties, nothing will happen. The government's are quite happy to allow the companies to take the blame as they don't want to be involved, but as too many people block the calls, they question is how long will it be till people question the requirement to have and pay for a telephone line when other alternatives exist. The telephone companies are major tax cows for government Exchequers so expect to see some movement reasonably soon.

Aussies, Yanks may think they're big drinkers – but Brits easily booze them under the table


Re: Have you tasted American and Aussi beer?

Back in the day, S&N built a very expensive and technological advanced brewery in Newcastle with the idea that the computers would analyse any beer and be able to program the machines to reproduce exactly and mass produce it.

Ah! Now the catch, the Edinburgh Fountainbridge brewery produced 80/- heavy which was very popular in Scotland, but didn't travel well but was sold in England as Scottish Bitter, where it was also popular. Most Scots were aware of the name change, and travelling through England tried the Bitter which nearly always didn't meet with approval.

You should by now be getting an idea of the disaster that was evolving. Yep, S&N took some 80/- beer from Fountainbridge brewery, passed it through the system and so confident were they, the barrels, cans, kegs and whatever were filled with 80/- to go to Scotland and Bitter to England. Remember when I mentioned that the beer didn't travel... The professional beer drinkers in Scotland and England discovered that their favourite beverage now tasted unusual and to their tastes, unpleasant. Bitter no matter how it was branded as 80/- did not sell, and 80/- branded as Bitter was similar.

Within a short time, Fountainbridge was saved, for a few years at least.

*For those born in the 80's and 90's and since, 80/-, pronounced eighty shilling, referred to the tax paid on a barrel of beer and was imposed on the strength of the brew rather than the style, but since brewers (and at one time there were 30 different breweries in Edinburgh alone) were well aware of what was selling, the styles became very similar. Amalgamation of the brewers went ahead and we ended up with S&N, cutting costs as the accountants tried to maintain profits, and dividends to shareholders. That history has a bad reputation for repeating itself, I shall not comment on.

Northern UK smart meter rollout is too slow, snarls MPs' committee


Worked in British Gas some years ago before smart meters were even a glint in a politicians eye, and one of the fun things was when any one told me that their meter Gas or Electric was recording too much power being used (funny it was never, ever the other way round) and that their bill was too high.

The meters had evolved over 100 years, and quite simply, they worked, every bug and problem had been solved. Nearly every trick and criminal action that human ingenuity had used to get power cheaply or free had been recorded and easily recognised. Yes they had to be replaced after 20 years, because it was always worth while running a check (especially with dangerous things like gas (goes boom) or electricity can kill, shocking I know) before being cleaned up and fitted back into someone else's house as a 20 yo replacement.

Yes, there was a charge for changing a meter and testing (£50 repaid if a fault was found), but the failure rate was something like 1 in a hundred thousand after testing. And Yes, there were occasions when high usage was real, because someone eg: had wired up a block of flats to a single house hold meter, or had a new swimming pool fitted to a house (why anyone had thought heating the pool was free....), or any number of interesting cases but it was nearly always human cock up rather than the meters to blame. (Or the time someone phoned up to request BG supply gas to the house she was just about to move into, and it was discovered that of all 1000 houses in the estate, built 5 years previously, none had ever received a gas bill as Transco had forgotten to register the meters as in use after fitting them. Ooops!)

'This is insane!' FCC commissioner tears into colleagues over failure to stop robocalls


Re: Poor FCC Commisioner Rosenworcel. She will now be inundated and the carriers will laugh.

How do the telecoms make money? As per national treaties going back many years, every call must be connected. To encourage the companies to do this, every company through which the call travels, receives a micropayment from the originator of the call. Many micropayments is a hell of a lot of dosh. It's like asking a heroin addict to receive payment for injecting themselves billions of times a day....

Bowel down: Laxative brownies brought to colleague's leaving bash


Re: Dumb move

Having accidentally been caught out by the little jelly bears of satan, all I can add is that they should be banned under the Geneva Convention. After eating a handful, your stomach will start rumbling about an hour later - you will only have a few seconds before the explosion. Hopefully, you will be sitting down, unencumbered around your nether regions of any clothing, on the toilet, in the bushes, behind trees, very hopefully, in privacy, hanging on to something heavy enough to prevent going into orbit - otherwise, things get very messy........On the other hand, probably the most effective laxative known to man!


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