* Posts by Astarte

156 publicly visible posts • joined 25 Aug 2007

Page:

Eurofighter Typhoon: It's EVEN WORSE than we thought

Astarte

Grand Unified Theory of Multinational Procurement

Once upon a time some clever chaps in MoD (PE) decided to test a theory. It had the right feel to it and went something like this:

If one nation can design, develop, produce and maintain a weapon system for £X then the total cost for 'n' nations would increase by the root of the number of nations. For example, for two nations to the total project would be 1.7 time more expensive. And there's a nice 'but' here – they would share the bill which meant they would actually get the weapon system for half of the total. In other words they'd get it for %70 of the original solo-nation procurement (cost 1.4X). Tempting. Increase that to three nations and the total cost would be 3^0.5 or 1.7 times the cost shared which equals %58 of the single-nation cost. Even more tempting.

Extend the theory to four nations and they'd each share the total cost of twice the original or %50 each. The more the merrier because no single nation was responsible for the overall project costs and they'd all get part of a very expensive result at a good discount.

What they didn't expect was that government and industrial management and bureaucracy costs for each nation would increase steeply because of the complex multi-national relationships most and differing work practises. Each company would use its own standards methods, standards and work practises but English would be 'the Language' for everything; they'd need more committees and more complex management to deal with the three other nations. Why care – they'd still be paid and, with no single nation in charge, they couldn’t be told how to do things. With hundreds of companies involved came many hundreds of methods. Remember, there was no leading design authority. At the time it was not thought important – like buying a Sony TV for use with a Panasonic PVR.

The technical requirements were far from ideal – vague and poorly often worded but perfectly well understood by each company in their own context and so there was no end of confusion. It was clear the requirements had needed a re-write at a more 'atomic' (non reducible) standard. Fair enough but it didn't happen until after contracts had been let and of course everyone wanted more money to adopt the re-written requirements.

A central authority was necessary to make sure the bits came together correctly but the companies were often reluctant to divulge their rationale for the way they did things. This resulted in countless disagreements and a fair amount of bullying.

How on earth did the ISS turn into a successful project with more than 20 nations and world-wide input get off the ground? Answers on the back of a postcard please.

Eurofighter is still a very good weapon system, it's a pity it's been smothered and strangled – a bit like the rest of the UK I suppose.

Portsmouth redefines the Olympic-sized swimming pool

Astarte

Spot-on Sarah

Didn't Einstein say that?

US robot ornithopter spy-hummingbird in flight test triumph

Astarte

Does it 'Tweet'?

Interesting demo - I expect there'll be a big following on the birdseed, sorry - birdbrain, site.

Congrats to the developers, it must have been fun developing it.

What sealed Nokia's fate?

Astarte

N8 UI

>Mark Jan,

Tell us the name of the 'app' you're referring to for N8 UI?

Techies floored by 'virus' after Playboy mansion party

Astarte

Headache, stomach ache

One day when one of my daughters was two or three years old she looked glum. 'What's wrong dear?' my wife asked. 'My tummy's got a headache' she said.

Joy Division get the Playmobil treatment

Astarte

Missed point

Interesting how so many experts can jump on the content for criticism and so few applaud or even acknowledge the effort put in to making this work of art for our delectation. It must have taken ages - good camera work, choreography, editing and direction. How many rehearsals there must have been.

Congratulations to all involved - Encore, encore.

Malawi poised to outlaw farting

Astarte

Before DNA analysis was common - with Derek and Clive

Here's a certain story http://www.phespirit.info/derekandclive/live_05.htm

Astarte

Toot Tone

Stewart,

I think you may be referring to this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LvwYUnSoQo

Next smartphone tech? Predator style thermal cameras

Astarte

Add a VR Headset

I don't see why this idea shouldn't be commonplace in the not too distant future. If the purpose is simply to locate hotspots a relatively low pixel count will suffice. I can imaging a phone clipped to a shoulder strap with the video fed to a Head-Up-Display as used in so many applications today - attached to a pair of glasses or a hat. Add to that the phone's video recorder with GPS data and sound plus the ability to use visual and/or IR or even mixed imagery and you'd have quite a nice little self-contained low profile surveillance system. I'd have thought that mass production would make the cost of small quartz, ZnSe or other IR-transparent material lenses low enough for general use. An application for remote control would fairly trivial to produce.

Gatwick Airport security swoops on 3-inch rifle

Astarte

Dangerous Things

I agree with you about 'Come Fly With Me' - a wonderful satire. Mind you plastic bullets can be effective (e.g. the ones used by riot police). But I'd feel really intimidated if someone threatened me with said statuette, I mean, really, he might throw it at me and make me spill my drink.

Remember that even pictures of weapons are banned - even fictional weapons. See http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/06/03/transformers_bust/ (nice one Lester)

Perhaps the baddies could smuggle a pencil and a piece of paper on board and then, at the appropriate juncture, 'draw' their gun and make their demands...

Mac daddy predicts all-knowing, all-seeing UI

Astarte

Déjà vu

Dave: Shut yourself down, Hal.

HAL: I'm sorry Dave, I can't do that.

Arthur C Clarke's forward-thinking was iconic but I don't like the thought of anything which will increase the amount of moronic jabbering into mobile phones on the trains, on the busses or in the street.

Ace Reg reporter in career suicide shock

Astarte

Bon Voyage

Dear Chris,

I'll be sorry to see you go as I've always respected and enjoyed your views, opinions and reporting style. I wish you all the best for your future with the Telegraph and I'm sure you'll be a tremendous asset to that mighty organisation.

Make it work and don't let the standards slip.

You've been a stalwart member of El Reg – thank you for being here.

Astarte

Primary school miss flashes porn vid at kiddies

Astarte

The Archers

I think it was the BBC Archers radio program where, in one episode, a baby-sitter made the same mistake with a group of young children in her house. She went to make tea and saw the mistake when she returned. The kids described it as 'People playing games with no clothes on'.

Sex abuse fax leak costs council £100k

Astarte

Procedures

Having been involved in transmission of sensitive information the recognised correct method is to telephone the intended recipient, confirm their identity or authority to receive such information and confirm their fax number then ask them to wait at the fax machine. The fax is then sent and the recipient has to confirm receipt. If the confirmation is not received an investigation can be initiated immediately and appropriate action taken. The first step in this case is to send a statutory notice to the same number regarding how to deal with the fax.

It is the sender's responsibility to confirm correct receipt of the fax. The sender's fax machine should not have automatic re-send activated.

This is a simple procedure which should be in the sender's job description along with a notice regarding action to be taken if the procedure is not carried out.

Unarmed Royal Navy T45 destroyer breaks down mid-Atlantic

Astarte

Already Prototyped

Didn't they have a early version of your container ship in Waterworld?

MoD battles copycat hackers

Astarte

SQL in URL

Any sensitive data open to queries from the public internet should not be subject to user-crafted SQL strings. If that's the way it's got to be then the data tables for public access should exist on an isolated server as a quarantined image of the actual data. Any corruption caused by malicious attempts at data modification or deletion will affect only the ‘public’ version. Changes to the public areas can easily be detected and dealt with. This approach also allows for data sanitisation before publication.

The site might as well carry a caveat with something like ‘Please don’t change our data because if you do and we find out well feel a bit miffed.’

Moms stand firm against antenna madness

Astarte

Think about the children.

I assume there will be a similar law prohibiting children entering any area within 1500 ft of the antennæ.

Microsoft Windows glider crashes

Astarte

Beta Version?

I'm sure MS would have done some research and field testing on this product before 'The Day'.

I mean, I can't imagine a prestigious company like MS releasing a faulty untested product to the world with such a glitzy and loud fanfare, only to watch it fail at its first public showing.

Says a lot for the "team of smart guys and girls" employed by MS (Sorry, I know that's unfair on the "team of smart guys and girls").

Perhaps they should have named it Icarus, then they could have blamed the failure on (the) Sun.

Turkish groom accidentally sprays wedding guests with bullets

Astarte

Recoil

Not an AK47 but interesting. At least was in a training booth.

http://davestopher.com/images/Videos/irak2.asf

Nokia C3

Astarte

Exclamation Mark and Apostrophe

Mr Oliver,

Er, I know I'm not always quite sane but aren't those two 'missing keys' perching like parrots on the shoulders of the 'Question Mark' and 'L' keys, eh? Come on, tell me they're not.

They are not missing, they just need the shift key. And claiming that "Handy punctuation like @ and the full stop have their own keys" is not true because they are also shared.

Nexus One phone rockets to 28,000ft

Astarte

Image Clarity

An interesting experiment. It could have been a good test of a camera's image stabilisation system.

Futurologist defends 'malevolent dust' warning

Astarte

Smart Dust

1996 Arthur C Clarke and Mike McQuay: Richter 10

Smart dust played a significant part in the espionage activities employed during earthquake research. Good read, weak ending but still a good read. Earthquakes, Tsunamis et al.

EU boffins aim to reinvent the hard disk

Astarte

Good use of technology

I see it as a scaled-down version of the equipment use to place eggs in their cartons. Kidding apart the idea of self-assembly is attractive and highly cost-effective. With a predicted six-fold increase in areal density, the larger problem will be with the mechanics - how to produce a read-write system capable of coping with not only the positional but also the magnetic accuracy plus dealing with I/O bandwidths.

Good development, and one that sounds highly promising.

Piles for Windows - a pain in the arse?

Astarte

What's in a name?

'Piles' is the cut-down version of another program; it was going to be called ‘HaemorrhoidsLite'.

Woman sues Google after highway knockdown

Astarte

Blind Stupidity Rules OK

People

will

only

think

for themselves

if

you

Tell Them To!

Business intelligence – still an oxymoron?

Astarte

Buzzword Business

The general subject has been a joke for years. Take a look at this very old Dilbert cartoon:

http://christophercotton.com/monkeyboys/images/dilbert-buzzword.jpeg

A few of us tried it during a series of meetings; it certainly encouraged us to pay attention for fear of missing something.

'Beauty with antimatter bottom' created out of pure energy

Astarte

Around the Circle

Wonderful stuff and good reporting. We Need More.

As an aside, reading the article, having just returned from Slims Throat Emporium, the mention of muons and anti-muons seemed to settle in my brain. Could this be a covert reference to cats? Mewing and anti-mewing or simply mews and anti-mews. Schoedinger knew all about cats and by association mewing or muon(ing). The chaps at LHC might need to stand back from their discoveries just to apply Schroedinger's and Heisenberg's theories. I'm sure they do, but do they really/

I'd suggest that bottoms and tops exist simultaneously until one attempts to investigate one of them.

Ok, Back to the pub.

PGP co-founder takes OS security job with Apple

Astarte
Alert

Now what will happen to PGP?

Will this mean that Apple will claim IPR on PGP and prohibit Jon Callas from ever updating it?

Chinese go beyond binary with ternary molecule

Astarte

No enough states

Keep increasing the number of values that can be carried on a single conductor and you'll end up with a new computing concept - maybe call it Analogue (or Analog for those that can't spell). For specific applications they are still much faster than any digital solutions yet invented.

Mine's the one with the patch cords haning out of the pocket.

Newspaper e-reader launched

Astarte

How flexible?

I mean, can you hang it on a nail in the outside lavvy?

Parking spot flies to International Space Station

Astarte

@ Julian 4. Re.: The Standard Pint?

Don't bet on it Julian 4 - US pints are about 473 cubic centimetres (16 fl. oz.); UK Pints are 568 cubic centimetres or 20 fl. oz.

That's also why one US gallon is only 0.8 of a British gallon.

I do agree that it’s about time the press stopped pandering to the US parochialism of pretending that everyone else in the world uses ‘their’ standards

Incidentally, my beer comes in half-litres, very nearly a pint.

Getting back to the ISS I’d have expected a general standardisation of docking and ingress/egress points for emergency access, as they have on submarines. Unilateralism in these things does not bode well for future cooperation in space exploration missions

'Something may come through' dimensional 'doors' at LHC

Astarte

Progress

Keep banging the rocks together chaps - look what happened when that was tried a long long time ago. We'll end up with either income tax and rice pudding or expose a portal through which unstoppable hoards of Auditors come marching through. However I'm sure Gordon and (Her Ladyship) Alyx can deal with it - until the next time.

Electro/photonic 'Excitonic' cryo-computing breakthrough

Astarte

What's in a number?

For anyone with an interest in units of temperature I recommend the following article:

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2191/why-do-we-have-so-many-temperature-scales

The question of a prefix is a little unclear - the use of the ‘degree’ symbol (º) is preferred to the written form ‘degrees’ or 'Deg' but is usually omitted if the context is clear. Incidentally the Germans generally use the term ‘Grad’ meaning degrees (not to be confused with the Gradian which is 1/400th of a circle), e.g. the temperature today is 20 Grad.

Disgruntled parrot lays into copper

Astarte

Pieces of Seven

It’s an old one, but still very good:

Question

What goes ‘Pieces of seven, pieces of seven’?

Answer

A parity error.

Sorry about that – back to my perch.

Sim-free Palm Pré pre-orders tip up in UK

Astarte

Is it Genuine?

I have been a keen supporter of the Palm product range since the days of the Palm Pilot. Always impressed by it, in particular the enthusiastic support provided by enthusiasts and companies in the creation and supply of free or cheap third-party apps.

I was very disappointed to hear that Palm had chosen to release the Pré only to a limited number of network suppliers because it goes strictly 'against the grain' of flexibility and freedom of choice. I am happy with my existing service provider as many other people are with them. Like me they do not wish to be forced to switch contracts or to be limited when travelling to other countries. When I travel I usually buy a pre-paid card for the duration.

So, are the subject offers genuine from Palm or will they be 'unlocked' by the distributor potentially exposing buyers to later hassles when Palm decides to re-lock the phone at a later date?

Custard Creams can kill: Official

Astarte

Outrageous

Absolutely outrageous, that really takes the biscuit.

How on earth can responsible manufacturers be allowed to marked such products without being forced to include a healthwarning covering at least a third of the packaging.?

Boozy chess grandmaster passes out mid-game

Astarte

That's one way of winning

I trust his opponent was granted the game and went on to play again? Or was he responsible for spiking a drink or two?

Beer drinking model to get caned in Malaysia

Astarte

One Crime

China Miéville, in his fascinating book 'Perdido Street Station', refers to a group of people/creatures who really have only one punishable crime - 'Choice Theft'. Quite a novel (no pun) concept.. For example stealing something from someone also steals that person's choice to have and use the item. Killing someone is effectively stealing that person's choice to live. The concept can be applied to almost any situation: Mugging steals the victim's choice about keeping their money; Noisy neighbours steal their neighbours' rights to peace and quiet. Penalties for infringement were related to the significance of the crime but were generally severe.

Try it on any crime or act you wish - it certainly provokes thought.

MoD Minister: This is the last generation of manned fighters

Astarte

re Mr Mark V Thomas

Your mention of TSR2 inspired me to post this, particularly in the context of the headline. I remember a national newspaper showing a cut-away drawing of TSR2 (I was on the project then). The drawing showed the significant points of interest and included an arrow pointing to the cockpit labelled 'Two nearly redundant RAF pilots'. The idea of unmanned weapons platforms was around even then.

Lads from Lagos cut off

Astarte

@Ben Schofield, 30.07.2009, 1402GMT

"This is terrible news. I was so close to receiving the £38,000,000 ... ."

Dear Mr Schofield,

Please read your information; I think you'll find they meant ZWD 38,000,000 (Zimbabwean Dolloars) which amounts to about £0.61 (really - check it out)..

Naturally this is subject to change and to surcharges and all other reasonable costs we can think up.

Sincerely yous,

. . .

Mission control reacquires UK space cheddar

Astarte

Poor mouse

The article didn't mention the story in 'Bad Mice Weekly' which explained that a starving mouse was killed by a piece of heavenly Cheddar which fell from ‘out of nowhere’. Apparently the victim's last words were 'Cheese, cheese, I must have cheese."

Cops and ISP in paedophile data mix up

Astarte

The World's a Magic Roundabout

There is only one true international time standard, 'Z'-time.

Those in the know will no doubt know that wherever you are on the planet, Zebedee will always say it's 'time for bed'.

It's a bit like quoting temperatures without specifying units be it Kelvin, Celsius, Fahrenheit, Rankine or Réaumur (that's just a rumour) and there are more, time should always be qualified by a reference e.g. UTC, or GMT etc. For those people who can't see over their fences using locally defined units is not enough. HAST (Hawaii-Aleutian Standard Time) for example ought to be qualified as UTC - 10 (if that's really what it is).

They don't bother about such trivia in China, it's all the same time there even if geographically it spreads across about four and a bit time zones and ignores daylight saving etc.

At least El Reg does its bit by using GMT timestamps for the postings.

Vulture Central plans Brit-Yank dictionary

Astarte
Go

While you're at it.

This is nothing to do with languages but I'd like to see a simple modification to the comments pages. Add an index number prefix to the subject line of each message published. That would make it a lot easier to refer back to an item to which people have made further comments or to which a comment writer might refer.

At present, with the current topic running to nearly 150 comments the only way I know to read comments referred to by other commenters is to do a text search. Whwreas it would be much more practical to just sroll back to the appropriate index number.

NASA tests rocket-disaster escape rocket

Astarte

Escape from the grave?

Looking at the photo and the foreground building and forgetting the scale it looks as if it is escaping from a tomb.

Mine's the coat with the Hells Angles logo on the back.

Titsup airport express lane biz may pawn flyer data

Astarte

Tits Up - Bottoms up to that.

I first heard this expression in the '60s. It was voiced by a senior RAF officer describing the state of aircraft or aircraft systems. It refers simply to someone or something dead or incapacitated and laying on its back. I suppose 'Breast Up' would be considered stupidly sexist. I’ll raise a glass to its survival.

Compared with the vocabulary often seen on these pages this is a very mild expression and far less offensive than some of the appallingly foul language, grammar and atrocious spelling spouted by would-be experts on every subject under the sun. Some of the worst appear to come from people who post a comment without the courtesy reading earlier comments in the thread.

Keep it up Reg – it’s still a good read and informative, once the wheat has been separated from the chaff.

NASA moon-attack probe beams home first lunar shots

Astarte

Be careful about where it impacts

Dark Side of the Moon. Anybody remember this?

We wouldn't want to desecrate Elvis Presley's resting place or the WW II bomber in which his body was found.

Zaphod Beeblebrox home sun 'shrinking', may have blown up

Astarte

Thumbs Up

I just checked my electronic thumb in case any constructor fleets are in the area but its battery's flat. Has anyone got any spares - just in case?

Dutch cat skinner publishes critics' personal details

Astarte

Horses for courses

Has nobody out there seen any of Gunther van Hagen's work? - do a search and look at his horse for example. His work is quite controversial but the stink seems to have died down. Taxidermy is not an offence unless the victim is still alive. Hmm, now what should we do with the vociferous complainers? Maybe some nice leather suitcases perhaps, or big bags at least.

Doughnut balloon-chute spaceships to reach Mars, Neptune

Astarte

Regenerative Braking?

It's a shame no one has come up with a way of recovering some of the energy wasted during re-entry. Perhaps deployable turbine- or propeller-type blades to caputure the energy for electrical, chemical or mechanical storage. It could provide a useful form of power for use on the surface. It would mean an increased payload but might prove cost effective over several missions particularly if the recovered energy could be stored on the planet for use by later missions..

Ofcom gets puffed out over wind turbines

Astarte

Vertical Sails?

I assume that vertical rotating sails as used on some sea-going vessels have been ruled out for some reason. They could be as tall as necessary and would probably not be so alarming to some people. I know almost nothing about RF propagation characteristics but it appears from the report that it is the indeterminacy of radar cross-section that causes the problems. The Fresnel effect has been known about for a long time and can be allowed for given a stable line-of–site scatter and attenuation. Call me silly but I would suspect that a vertical (cylindrical) sail would be perceived as a more stable interruption or disturbance. The diameter of the current rotor designs relates directly to the attenuation which is further compounded by the incidence angle which varies in direct relation to the prevailing wind direction. The radar cross-section of a vertical sail might not appear to vary so significantly as a result of wind direction. Some variation will result from feathering used to control the speed. One advantage of vertical sail is that the gearbox and electrical power conversion gear does not have to be balanced on top of the tower – it would be at ground level where access for maintenance would be better.

Vertical wind turbines would probably has less effect on the local avian population and aliens in their UFOs would probably think they were just chimneys so life would be better all round.

Page: