* Posts by ThatOne

295 posts • joined 9 Oct 2017

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Why does that website take forever to load? Clues: Three syllables, starts with a J, rhymes with crock of sh...

ThatOne Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: "By making this information available, Hulce hopes to help encourage efficient coding."

And to make things worse, those scripts are usually hosted on inadequately slow/cheap servers.

A few days ago I made a test on a website: With NoScript, page loaded in 2-3 seconds. With Noscript disabled, page loaded in 20 seconds, with lots of messages like "waiting for x script host, waiting for y script host, etc.". That has nothing to do with execution, and no faster JavaScript engine can fix it.

(After all, my original reason to use an ad blocker back then was to escape the 5-10 seconds delays on each page load because of "waiting for Google Analytics"...)

.

As about shaming the ad industry towards better practices - Sure, like they even know what the term "shame" might mean... They're greedy bloodthirsty parasites, and we're the unwilling hosts.

White House and FCC announce big, broken solutions to America's pitiful broadband

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

What is all this fuss about, Internet coverage reaches 100% according to a recent email poll...

Skype goes blurry, Office gets a kick in the privacy, and Microsoft takes us back to 1990

ThatOne Silver badge

> So, Microsoft, will the telemetry tweaks apply to consumers who are [...] based outside of the EU

I'm pretty sure they will check the computers locale setting and its IP address, and if both point to Europe, they will not slurp (too much). If any one points outside (visiting foreigner or traveling european) they will.

It's OK, everyone – Congress's smart-cookie Republicans have the answer to America's net neutrality quandary

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: Small time chicanery

That's a "Talisman Name": Nobody would dare oppose a bill called the "Protecting Children from Internet Predators Act", would he...

Big trouble Down Under as Australian MPs told to reset their passwords amid hack attack fears

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

How is that even possible?

I thought the required backdoors would henceforth prevent any wrongdoings?

US lawmakers furious (again) as mobile networks caught (again) selling your emergency location data to bounty hunters (again)

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: So, I need fellow Regenistas help in getting some cell phone numbers....

If you breach his privacy the FBI will drop on you like a ton of bricks. He's a VIP after all...

ThatOne Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: The free market will fix this

> People will naturally gravitate toward providers who respect their privacy

You assume there are any. This is a monopoly, not some ideal free market.

WeWork restructuring bites El Reg hacks where it hurts as afternoon brew delayed

ThatOne Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Bloody Vegans

Why brass?

(Genuine question)

Chrome devs attempt to slip muzzle on resource-guzzling browser beast with 'Never-Slow Mode'

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Easy solution!

Block ads, and there is absolutely no problem with speed, browser freezing and resources anymore.

I never experienced slowdowns since I did: No long minutes "Waiting for Google Analytics" freezing everything, no slowdown as the CPU tries to run concurrently two dozen enormous scripts fighting for my attention and my data. The web is fast and fluid.

It's 2019, and a PNG file can pwn your Android smartphone or tablet: Patch me if you can

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

> if the message you get when you click on System Updates was 'Your device is no longer supported'

Yes, and call centers didn't pretend your call is very important to them. Unfortunately the convention is to not trouble the victim, it deteriorates the meat...

ThatOne Silver badge
Unhappy

Oh well

Well, add those to the long list of patches and fixes any device older than 6 months will probably never get...

London's Met police confess: We made just one successful collar in latest facial recog trial

ThatOne Silver badge
Coat

Re: London

> Middlesex (no such place [...])

Yes, there was even a whole Register article about that: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/06/22/garlic_survey/

Pixaaaarrrrrrghh! Mars-snapping CubeSats Wall-E and Eve declared dead (for now) by NASA bods

ThatOne Silver badge
Joke

Re: Or: 3.2Gigametres

How much is that in ångström?...

Boffin suggests Trappist monk approach for Spectre-Meltdown-grade processor flaws, other security holes: Don't say anything public – zip it

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: You don't say

> The professor addresses your point in his original post

No, he just gives a potential excuse why they might not fix something. An excuse all too easy to wield if bugs are not disclosed as there is always something more pressing/important to do (management bonus, golf meeting, etc.).

(i didn't downvote you BTW)

ThatOne Silver badge
Facepalm

You don't say

> allowing the flaws to be secretly fixed by vendors

That's where he lost me. It's well established that vendors love wasting money when they aren't forced to. And what forces them to do it is the public naming & shaming, followed by the customer pressure of "fix it or else". If nobody knows about it there is no pressure, ergo no reason to fix anything.

(All right, some might, but the majority definitely won't. A cent not spent is a cent earned.)

Good news! Only half of Internet of Crap apps fumble encryption

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: Even worse than it sounds

Cryptography is only there to check a marketing requirement, allow to print "Encrypted Communications: Military Grade Safety!" on the product's box.

The fact is, nobody can say (in court) there is no encryption, and the marketing blurb never said anything about efficient encryption, so there is no actual problem for them to solve.

(Besides it won't bother the kind of innocents who buy this stuff: "Uh, encryption, isn't that what spies use? Why would I need it?")

Jammy dodgers: Boffin warns of auto autos congesting cities to avoid parking fees

ThatOne Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: So bill them per mile for driving in the city

> show up at 8am to pick you up

Anybody who has driven to pick up kids from school knows there is no worse cause for congestion than "picking people up": "Oh no, (s)he isn't out yet, I will stop somewhere near the entrance for a minute or twenty" or alternatively "I'll drive around the block, again and again, with other parents joining in in an ever-growing stampede of cars orbiting the school entrance".

I definitely do not want to get anywhere near a bigger office building on closing time while hundreds of artificial idiot driven cars try to pick up their respective owners.

Oh cool, the Bluetooth 5.1 specification is out. Nice. *control-F* master-slave... 2,000 results

ThatOne Silver badge

A question please?

Sorry to ask, but I guess this new standard only works with new, specific hardware?

OK, smarty pants AI. You can beat us humans at video games. But how about real-world puzzles like Jenga? Oh, oh no

ThatOne Silver badge
Coat

Something has gone terribly wrong

In the ads about the post year-2000 future I remember robots were to do the hard and boring work and leave us to have fun.

How comes robots are built to have fun while we do the hard and boring work?...

Are you a Windows 1 in 10 (1809)? Or a mighty 80 percenter (1803)?

ThatOne Silver badge
Joke

Re: Killed my printers

By buying a new computer - With Windows 10 on it...

Facebook cuts off independent political ad reviewers, claims security concerns

ThatOne Silver badge
Big Brother

Not surprised

Well, they won't let people mess with their money maker. Where else can you buy privileged access to millions of voters' heads?

Q. What do you call an IT admin for 20-plus young children? A. A teacher

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: "Young students, for example, cannot be expected to remember and enter a password. "

I agree. Schools have been taken unawares by that new tool, and the teachers, usually from the generation before computers were commonplace, usually barely know enough to get it working; You can't expect them to become knowledgeable IT specialists all on their own, at least not at this level of salary. And it's not like schools are rolling in dough and can afford to train their staff, so they left to hope nothing too bad will happen...

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: "Young students, for example, cannot be expected to remember and enter a password. "

> Well then, just empty out their accounts

Bad idea, because I'm the one they call when something is amiss, and I'm supposed to unravel the mess because "they don't know how to".

I definitely prefer them to use good passwords, the days I spend brainwashing them are weeks I won't have to waste trying to repair real damage.

ThatOne Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: "Young students, for example, cannot be expected to remember and enter a password. "

This is mostly an issue of mental attitude.

I have (adult) relatives who just refuse to use passwords, even for important things like for instance their banking site. Even when I make them a little paper notebook with all the websites and passwords clearly written. Our conversations are always a variation of this:

"I can't use a password! Just leave the door open!"

"But anyone could access your bank account and empty it!"

"I can not, and will not use a password! I already forgot it!"

"But look, everything is written here, in the passwords notebook..."

"I can't use a password! Just leave the door open!" (re-read from top)

.

Long story short, there is nothing wrong with passwords. The problem is user resistance and the belief they can complain themselves out of using them. There are solutions, but they just don't want to use them, throwing hissy fits and requesting some miracle solution instead. (To the delight of all snake oil vendors...)

Trying to log into Office 365 right now? It's a coin flip, says Microsoft: Service goes TITSUP as Azure portal wobbles

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

New Register category - "Microsoft Problems"

Who else thinks that Microsoft blunders have gotten so common they deserve their own "The Register" category? It seems to me like there hasn't been a day without something breaking in the last months, be it their cloud or some "upgrade" killing MS Windows...

Sad relics of UK launch capability returned to Blighty while NASA fiddles with Boeing crew

ThatOne Silver badge
Coat

Re: Galileo

> Britain will proudly face in the opposite direction to all other countries!

You already do this on every highway... :-p

Apple: You can't sue us for slowing down your iPhones because you, er, invited us into, uh, your home... we can explain

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: Attitude

I'm currently using a Samsung Note 2 bought in 2012, original battery, still going strong. Well, instead of a day (and a half), the battery now only lasts half a day on normal use, but that's nothing a new battery wouldn't fix (the battery is removable), after which it should be good to go for another 6-7 years.

I consider that phone to have definitely been money well spent, and won't change it unless I'm sure I get a similar bargain. One thing is sure, I'll certainly won't shell out a thousand for something built to last a single year. That would be wrong on so many levels (83.33 per month, reckless pollution, etc.)...

ThatOne Silver badge
Coat

Re: "Apple had no duty to disclose the facts regarding software capability and battery capacity."

> So you go on and pretend that you have no "duty" to tell your customers just exactly what it is they're getting for half their monthly salary (or more). On the other hand, stop complaining that you don't understand why your stuff isn't selling so well anymore.

On the other hand, Rolls Royce never sold a single car on its technical specs. People buy the "newest Apple", not a "better phone". The problem arises just when they realize their apple turned into a lemon.

Amazon's titchy robots hit the streets, Waymo starts a self-driving car factory...

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: Self-driving cars getting a bit stale now.

> I don't know what urban area anywhere in the world they think that's going to work .

Silicon Valley suburbs?

(After all that's where everybody (who matters (to them)) lives.)

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: Scout - what could possibly go wrong?

> how Scout will ring doorbells

Or open doors to get into the building, operate lifts (or face the Dalek dilemma), and generally navigate inside an unknown building (with potentially bad/no reception allowing to remote control it).

I tend to think this is just another marketing stunt. Like, you remember, those drones which would revolutionize fast on-premises delivery by crashing through the glass facade of your office building to bring you a sandwich and a cool beverage.

Six Flags fingerprinted my son without consent, says mom. Y'know, this biometric case has teeth, say state supremes...

ThatOne Silver badge
Thumb Down

Re: So I gather

> A photo on the season pass will be far simpler

Indeed. A photo is how all the other places handle similar cases, and they haven't gone out of business. I mean, how many cheating identical twins do you need to feel the financial impact?

But it's always cool to go for the extremes. I'm pretty sure they would use genetic fingerprinting if they had a way to do it fast & quickly at the gates... This nonsense needs to be nipped in the bud.

ThatOne Silver badge
WTF?

Re: Wrong end of telescope

Or Illinois shouldn't base is commercial health solely on trafficking of peoples' data?

In which case there would be no impact?

FCC accused of colluding with Big Cable to game 5G legal challenge

ThatOne Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: I hope they nail Pai and his cohorts

> I'd absolutely love to see Pai wind up in prison!

Except he will most likely just end up in a cushy job at Big Cable. No need to worry about him, he'll do all right (as most opportunists do).

I can hear the light! Boffins beam audio into ears with freakin' lasers

ThatOne Silver badge
Stop

Re: Surely some mistake

Definitely: 16 MHz would be the decameter shortwave radio band. Some laser.

Fortunately the real article's abstract helps: It mentions they used a "1.9 μm thulium laser".

A picture tells a 1,000 words. Pixels pwn up to 5 million nerds: Crims use steganography to stash bad code in ads

ThatOne Silver badge
Joke

Another reason we should block ad blockers

It's obvious, isn't it.

(If you don't get it, ask Google. They'll be happy to explain it to you.)

Tech sector meekly waves arms in another bid to get Oz to amend its crypto-busting laws

ThatOne Silver badge
WTF?

Who watches the voyeurs?

We all know what self-imposed restrictions and controls are worth. Reality has proven it over and over again, all over the world.

So "fighting for more restrictions" is like applying another layer of lipstick to the pig in question. Don't know about you, but I still wouldn't kiss it.

As netizens, devs scream bloody murder over Chrome ad-block block, Googlers insist: It's not set in stone (yet)

ThatOne Silver badge
Terminator

Re: welp....

Sorry, but do you seriously rely on the sufficiently "technically inclined" to "starve the beast"?

Out of the many millions of people using the Internet, how many are capable (and willing!) to build and maintain a DIY filter on their home networks? Not everyone using a browser is a seasoned network admin.

Besides, installing and maintaining a filtering Pi on all their friends' and relatives' homes might become a full time job for the 1% who can actually do it... IMHO some will do it, most won't, at least not for long.

Holy crappuccino. There's a latte trouble brewing... Bio-boffins reckon 60%+ of coffee species may be doomed

ThatOne Silver badge

Re: Great solution to overpopulation!

Are you sure? I'd think they'd slump in a corner and lie there apathetically, until passing pets or wildlife eat them.

That is, if they manage to make it out of bed in the first place - I know I wouldn't.

Amazon shareholders revolt on Rekognition, Nvidia opens robotics lab, and hot AI chips on Google Cloud

ThatOne Silver badge

The point being most likely to separate the name and market value of Amazon from whatever potential bad press this technology might create. If some Amazon subsidiary named "Evil Works Inc." gets to sell Rekognition to oppressive regimes and harvests a bad press, it won't affect Amazon share value.

DDoS sueball, felonious fonts, leaky Android file manager, blundering building security, etc etc

ThatOne Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: Not acceptable

> a fundamental coding error

Coding a fully functional HTTP server is a "coding error"? Some error! There are people who would want to do it on purpose and yet fail.

This is definitely a voluntary attempt to get into peoples' phones.

Lawyers' secure email network goes down, firm says it'll take 2 weeks to restore

ThatOne Silver badge

Ransomware?

Two weeks to assess which files are clean and which are infected, and then reloading of the last clean backup, which would be the one from two weeks ago, 14 days being the grace period of the ransomware. Or some such.

RIP 2019-2019: The first plant to grow on the Moon? Yeah, it's dead already, Chinese admit

ThatOne Silver badge
WTF?

Puzzled

I don't really see how they hoped anything could survive 14 days of total darkness with temperatures more than twice as cold as anything earth has to offer. Clearly the probe could not provide energy to keep the canister warm and illuminated for those two weeks with no sunlight, apparently it hasn't even enough energy reserves to power itself during the lunar night. So, what was this "mini biosphere" thing all about? When the next lunar day comes, everything in that canister will be (very) deep frozen. Do they hope to thaw and revive those seeds and eggs somehow? I'm intrigued.

It's raining, then? Hallelujah. Big Blue super 'puter sharpens forecasts

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: More detailed is not more accurate

> If this is the case, then can we have our forecasts without ads

You have a refreshing sense of humor...

Huawei and Intel hype up AI hardware, TensorFlow tidbits, and more

ThatOne Silver badge
Big Brother

Brave New World

Fakes (deep or shallow) are a boon to spin doctors and other heads of propaganda: If you just say "XYZ eat little babies", it's your word against theirs (and common sense's), but if you can direct people to YouTube, where they can see (if they squint enough) XYZ eating a baby, it's all good: Your followers will henceforth be able to say they saw it with their own eyes, and any refutation is automatically "Fake News".

Or, in the vernacular: Picture, or it didn't happen.

AT&T, Sprint, Verizon, T-Mobile US pledge, again, to not sell your location to shady geezers. Sorry, we don't believe them

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

Re: Then they shouldn't mind if there is legislation that enforces this

> I'll suspect that not only are the telcos lying, but the congressmen who take money from their lobbyists KNOW they are lying.

You suspect?

Microsoft wins today's buzzword bingo with empowering set of updates to Teams

ThatOne Silver badge
Devil

> without noticeably changing their meaning

I'm not sure about that:

Praise: Minimalistic acknowledgement that somebody has done what he was supposed to do

Badge: Visible (and only tangible) result of "Praise"

Teams: Groups of hamsters sharing a wheel

Those terms definitely need a capital so people don't mistake them for the original words they are derived from. Quotation marks would be too cumbersome to use in everyday HR output.

Jeep hacking lawsuit shifts into gear for trial after US Supremes refuse to hit the brakes

ThatOne Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: History not favourable

> We have managed so far without network connected vehicles

We have also managed so far without Internet connected tea kettles, yet here we are...

Marketing dictates that everything should be "connected" because it sounds "cool", even there is no real use to it (Do you really need your shoes to automatically update your Facebook status to "walking"?).

Cops: German suspect, 20, 'confessed' to mass hack of local politicians

ThatOne Silver badge
Holmes

Damage mitigation...

> It appears strange that a lone 20-year-old should go to such lengths if he was not aware of the extent of his actions.

Sure, but it's the easiest way to say "Nothing to see here, move along already": Just paint the stereotypical image of the irresponsible young hacker (male - check, living off his mother's basement - check) who does stuff out of pure stupidity, and nobody will get to ask any embarrassing questions (like, is there any security about peoples' private information in our age of computers and networks?). This incident should definitely not interfere with the gradual push towards backdoors and mass surveillance...

Sorry, Samsung. Seems nobody is immune to peak smartphone

ThatOne Silver badge
Coat

> Smartphones are experiencing their first ever recession, and Samsung is feeling the pain too.

Obvious solution: Next year's Samsung flagship smartphones will cost upwards of $2000...

Chill, it's not WikiLeaks 2: Pile of EU diplomatic cables nicked by hackers

ThatOne Silver badge
Holmes

> why the hell would they release the data from the breach?

Very true. There must be a reason those (former) NSA guys released those cables.

To put pressure on somebody (who?)? Hint at things (to whom?)? Or (since it's a startup) just to prove they can get stuff done, and thus deserve funding and contracts?

Given the apparent low value of the hoard, IMHO this reason is the only interesting part. It's unlikely they got bored and decided to collect some stolen diplomatic cables to send to the NYT just for the fun, so why?

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