* Posts by Funkymunky

11 posts • joined 30 Aug 2017

Fire up the FruityLoops! Sir David Attenborough wants someone to remix Balinese field recording


Re: my first thought was

Mine was Miss The Girls by the Creatures


Julian Assange jailed for 50 weeks over Ecuador embassy bail-jumping


Summing Up

I sum it up thus...So Lame, No Shame.

The man is an arse.

Demand for HP printer supplies in free-fall – and Intel CPU shortages aren't helping either


Printing? Whats that?

I use a Kyocera B&W wifi enabled laser I bought from Amazon for under £30 new 2 years ago - not needed a cartridge yet. I'd probably be as well chucking the printer away and buying another cheapo one when it finally runs out (might be in a pine box by then). Wife prints a load more than me as she is a teacher and produces stuff for classes. So her old Brother all-in-1 laser gets 3rd party toner cheap from Amazon, usually 2-3 cartridges a year.

My work decided to move to "Multifunction Devices" aka photocopiers for all printing 5 years ago, to do away with the 600+ printers on site. They spoke of forcibly removing all printers in one day. I managed to get them to agree to leave the printers but ban toner sales, that way we would use up the already purchased small toner mountain. It was just a coincidence, of course, that I had laid in apocalypse level supplies for my desktop HP CP2025. It is still merrily printing away, must be 10 yrs old now. Only 3 full sets of toner left now...yikes...

Destroying the city to save the robocar


F**K the Disabled

So, we cycle in polytunnels and eschew door to door transport. My wife would love it, cycling along waving her white cane in front with her guide dog on the back of the tandem barking left right instuctions...

She already struggles with shit public transport infrastucture - she can't get to her work from home using public transport, and thats town to city, not rural isolation to city. She encounters buses that she can't use as they have very steep steps up to the passenger level and her guide dog just refuses what looks to him as too dangerous an activity. Train firms are lobbying to get rid of conductors, but platforms and trains all have varying heights/reach to the boarding level, so that means no train journeys for her without someone to assist her onto/off of the train.

Electric vehicles are already the stuff of nightmares for her. Imagine you are standing at a road junction with your eyes tight shut, several cars around you are eletric and running totally silent. Now cross the road...

Brit cities overrun with middle-aged dronies, reckons survey



I've only seen one drone in action round our way, the young Chinese neighbour and his very young son fly a small (must be cheap??) one out in the back lane for a few minutes every now and then. It replaced an RC car which the young un wasn't interested in. It appears the fun is to fly it for a wee while, crash, look dejected and go back indoors...

Our 23yr old very geeky software engineer son pronounced them pointless (as he faffed about with his £900 VR setup). Then again, he's just discovered Tinder/Girls/Sex, so he's not home much except to shower (Amazingly, lots more than than once a week), drop off clothing for washing and plan his next date.

SCARY SPICE: Pumpkin air freshener sparks school evacuation


Re: Impossible!

Our domestic is local, as was her predecessor. My wife thought a replacement would be hard to find, but a quick post on Facebook had over 30 applicants.

Should have employed someone decades ago...no way I am going back to doing the housework.

UK third worst in Europe for fibre-to-the-premises – report


Works for me...

Were were direct connected to the exchange (less than 100ft away) and had an average 18.5mb down, 0.5 up for years. Then, for a few months, Openretch vans were seen parked around a hole close to the exchange...voila...FTTC arrived. Upgraded my account (an extra £10 a month) and now get 74.5mb down, 18.8mb up here in rural Scotland. Son overjoyed and continues with his quest to reach 1tb use per month (we currently use around 850gb - slacker!).

Firemen fund sues Uber for dousing shares with gas, tossing in a match


Re: Is anyone thinking..... Firemans Fund

Yup..."Disco Inferno..." except, y'know, its taxis, so it'd have to be "Prius inferno"

You've been baffled by its smart thermostat. Now strap in for Nest's IoT doorbell, alarm gear


Its all gone to the dogs

Hmmmm, high cost of IOT allegedly good stuff vs the dog food for my two 40kg dogs..

Downsides of IOT well known. Downsides of the dogs...well, someone has to pick up the huge amounts of crap & they fart occasionally.

Very reliable, get free 24/7 monitoring, regular outer perimeter patrolling (including under the hedge where those invading cat bastards hang out) & very reliable face/smell yer bum detection.

Smart meters: 'Dog's breakfast' that'll only save you 'a tenner' – report


Dodged the bullet

My wife arranged a smart meter fitment while I was away on business (crafty cow).

Luckily, the engineers turned up, looked at our 240yr old house and its ancient meter. They muttered something about the wire to the meter being too short and left...Hooray.

Kiwi prankster 'oinks' down cops' radio and sings Old MacDonald


Re: Goodbye pork pie

Yup...I sat in the cinema and loved it, then hopped into my mates yellow mini for a typical hoon home...Choice.

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