* Posts by TrumpSlurp the Troll

400 posts • joined 4 Mar 2017


Dead LAN's hand: IT staff 'locked out' of data center's core switch after the only bloke who could log into it dies

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Not fired just died

For all those commentards who have said that he was fired, the article says they were thinking of firing him when he died unexpectedly.

Boeing big cheese repeats pledge of 737 Max software updates following fatal crashes

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Software release process

As noted before, it is not good practice to install an undocumented software feature which does not display an alert when activated.

Especially as the undocumented feature has obviously no documentation on how to to turn it off. Which you won't need because you don't know about it, let alone know that it has been activated.

Noting that an alert would be displayed should an optional extra have been installed.

Noting further that the supplier should have been well aware what percentage of the target install had in fact had the optional extra installed.

Still, the Alpha testing by end users does seem to have highlighted the problem and a fix is being rushed out.

I haven't seen anywhere so far that the software fix will be accompanied by the additional (so far optional) instrumentation to warn when the software is active.

Airlines in Asia, Africa ground Boeing 737 Max 8s after second death crash in four-ish months

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From reading the informed comments it looks as though there is one airline, SWA, which is effectively the Varsity for 737 pilots. They have a large body of experienced pilots who no doubt talk to each other about the job. Who also could cause major problems if they decline to fly a variant they consider unsafe. Not least politically.

If the airline decides all craft should have the additional instrumentation then this should be a very strong hint to all other operators that this is a required feature.

It seems realistic also to assume that the word has gone round all the pilots warning them of the issue and to make sure they understand how to cope with it.

From that it seems reasonable for SWA to continue flying the Max8 because they have effective mitigation for the issue.

However it seems that most airlines don't have the same level of expertise and experience flying the Max8 and should suspend flights until further training and instrumentation brings them up to the level of SWA.

The main thing to take away is that Boeing seem to have introduced an undocumented feature which does not warn the pilot when it is deployed. Not a good idea in any software system.

Naive question: do all modern planes still take off and climb on manual? Seems that once the plane is lined up and ready to roll an autopilot could handle the take off and climb.

USB4: Based on Thunderbolt 3. Two times the data rate, at 40Gbps. One fewer space. Zero confusing versions

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Otherwise known as faster than a very fast fast thing.

After last year's sexism shambles, 2019's RSA infosec bash has upped its inclusivity game

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Lot of mansplaining here

About how they never get molested so it can't happen to women, obviously.

Thought this was supposed to be a technical/logical forum.

You have a conference floor with 100 men to each woman.

What do you think the chances are of one man encountering 100 women, as opposed to one woman encountering 100 men?

And what are the odds of at least one of those men being a sexist obnoxious shit?

Unless you have never ever met someone like that in your whole working life.

Hey, sugar tits, take me to your boss?

Ah, this military GPS system looks shoddy but expensive. Shall we try to break it?

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Re: Sorry, but...

I still twitch a bit when I see BOWMAN.

The pills are helping, though.

Danger mouse! Potent rodents 'see' infrared after eyeballs injected with nanoparticles

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Counter measure.

If the enemy troops are IR adapted then in daylight they are vulnerable to powerful IR sources which won't affect non-standard troops in the same way.

I say, that sucks! Crooks are harnessing hoovers to clean out parking meters in Chelsea

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Cool Hand Luke

Came here to post just that.

However, consider the goose and the golden eggs.

You really need to cut a hole then plug it so it isn't obvious so you can repeat the cash grab with minimal effort every few days.

Which in turn raises the questions. Do the councils repair or replace? Do people keep feeding the meter when there is a hole in the side? How long before the theft is detected?

Demand for HP printer supplies in free-fall – and Intel CPU shortages aren't helping either

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Re: WTF!

Hardware revenue was boosted in the past because people realised it was cheaper to buy another printer than replace the ink.

3rd party ink is now cutting into this significantly.

Another HP Colour LaserJet user with 3rd party toner. :-)

Don't mean to alarm you, but Boeing has built an unmanned fighter jet called 'Loyal Wingman'

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Re: Loyal?

With you there.

The Loyal Retainer is the one who poisons you and/or stabs you in the back when a better option comes along.

Amazon Prime Air flight crashes in Texas after 6,000ft nosedive

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Re: We all thought the same!

I think some here are protesting too much and/or virtue signalling.

This is (allegedly) a technically literate audience trained to look beyond the immediate to the long term.

So I would expect roughly

(1) Shit. Poor bastards.

(2) Thank $Deity it was a cargo plane. A passenger plane would have been far worse.

(3) Probably a lot of goods in one basket. Wonder how long the supply chain will take to recover? Also known as *Dude, where's my parcel?".

So I suspect a lot of people wondered about all the lost packages without disregarding the tragic loss of life. Then paused to villify someone who stated what they were all thinking.

Airbus will shutter its A380 production line from 2021

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Wipes a tear

A few years back I flew to Australia and discovered that Malaysia Airlines business class was cheaper than Economy Plus on other airlines. For some reason there was a reluctance to use them; can't think why.

Pro tip - don't assume your tour operator is looking at Business Class when doing the comparisons. Sometimes that is a different team. Looking at you, Trailfinders!

Anyway, flew to KL on an A380 then on to Sydney in an A320. No real comparison because the A380 seats reclined fully to make a bed and the A320 seats reclined partially to make a slide. Difference between good and awesome. $Deity knows what it was like in Economy.

Hub and spoke is good for that length of travel. Even if you could fly, say, Auckland to Heathrow non stop that would be the equivalent of an assault course organised by a sadist. Suitable for the young and fit (and possibly stupid) but not for the mature and reflective individual.

The A380 is IMHO the ultimate in long haul passenger comfort. A shame that sardine cans look to be the future.

Fun fact: GPS uses 10 bits to store the week. That means it runs out... oh heck – April 6, 2019

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Weird and scary

After reading this I saw my TomTom suddenly lose location after doing the first part of the journey without issue.

Scary or what?

Fired up a spare Garmin which knew exactly where it is.

My (ancient) eTrex goes everywhere with me but doesn't get fired up. Just tried it and the copyright statement said 1999 to 2001 so April might be interesting.

I remember using this with Autoroute (2003 I think) and a serial/USB cable to navigate using a laptop. Happy days. When you didn't reboot with it still connected when Windows thought it was a serial mouse and much hilarity ensued (not).

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Re: Yay landfill! speciality trucker GPS

I paid real money (only time so far) for an Android mapping app called CoPilot. Around 50 notes to give routing based on length, height, width, weight of your vehicle.

I bought this for use with a caravan. A dedicated SatNav with the same features costs around £350. They do a trucker version as well IIRC.

Free map updates as well which means I won't be paying for any more map updates for my venerable TomTom.

Intelligent routing is a must have when you have a large outfit. Being stuck down a narrow lane which isn't wide enough to turn in is a fate usually reported for articulated lorries with dodgy (cheap car?) SatNavs but can't be fun with a caravan either.

I'm not sure a road atlas or paper map gives you road width, bridge height, or turning radius for tight bends either.

I have checked (briefly) and you do get different routes depending on setup.

TL;DR they do trucker SatNav for phones.

Leaky child-tracking smartwatch maker hits back at bad PR

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Ratners Defence

Well, it's a piece of crap anyway.

Is this supposed to reassure parents and dissuade them from suing?

How I got horizontal with a gimp and untangled his cables

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Re: Pictures or it didn't.......


Mine also have the padding.

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Pictures or it didn't.......

Perhaps noting that proper lycra cycling shorts usually include enough padding to conceal or at least disguise gender. To certain levels of endowment, anyway.

Evans can also be a tad expensive. The cost conscious keep an eye on Aldi (or occasionally Lidl) for their cycling clothing.

Tell NASA to grab the margarita mix – a sextillion-kg salty ring found floating in space

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Simple explanation?

Salts found in old star. New star hit something. Something was old star.

Thank you. Nobel prize in old notes, please. No consecutive numbers.

UK transport's 'ludicrous' robocar code may 'put lives at risk'

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Remote control operator?

Not much has been said so far of a remote control operator who can intervene in an emergency.

Is there any legislation, technology, training, test, insurance etc. for a driver who uses remote control?

Should they not have to demonstrate that they can drive safely in all circumstances via remote control before they are given the responsibility of overseeing an AV and intervening swiftly safely and appropriately should the AV encounter a problem?

Really, ffs why?

There are enough problems having a meat sack in the car as a safety override without trying to replicate the immersive experience of sight, sound and feeling that the driver in a car gets, using remote control technology.

You still need one on one mapping between supervisor and the AV and this is just adding another layer of technology and expense.

Unless, of course, some bright spark thinks you can have one remote human to every 20 cars, and the car will be trusted to ask for help then wait for the call centre to have an operative come free.

Highly trained local drivers from Mumbai will be able to add value and simultaneously drive costs down, of course.

NASA pops titanium tea cosy over Martian InSight probe instrument

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That just about

Puts the tin hat on it.

Techies tinker with toilet-topper to turn it into ticker-tracker

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I'm significantly impressed

That the testers (bare arsed for good contact, presumably) managed to assume the position without producing anything.

I would have expected ingrained instinct to have taken over.

UK.gov plans £2,500 fines for kids flying toy drones within 3 MILES of airports

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Drone use?

The obvious (to me) use would be to inspect the condition of roof and guttering of my house without having to use ladders.

The unpopular use would be to accompany the Google Street View vehicles as a robot swarm, updating the aerial views in high resolution.

Win some lose some scenario.

Holy crappuccino. There's a latte trouble brewing... Bio-boffins reckon 60%+ of coffee species may be doomed

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I read somewhere or a man in a pub told me that it was variable rainfall including drought which was likely to do for coffee.

The Iceman cometh, his smartwatch told the cops: Hitman jailed after gizmo links him to Brit gangland slayings

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A high viz vest?

I bet the stupid bastard was wearing a cycling helmet as well.

People, how many times do I have to tell you that all this "safety" gear doesn't make you safer. It just makes you feel invulnerable and encourages you to do stupid things!

Having AI assistants ruling our future lives? That's so sad. Alexa play Despacito

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Paris Hilton

We dream of automating.....

Then again some may dream of telling Alex's to go screw herself when the voice response isn't particularly responsive.

Which leads inevitably (for some) to errant thoughts of soft porn responses.

Alexa go f**k yourself!

I'm sorry, I don't know how to do that.

Hand on, Cortana says she will show me how...wow...oh!

{Cue girl on girl porn sounds}

Siri - what are you......oh!


Would you like me to use (product placement)?

You use it like (instructions).

It sounds like (electronics).

And it feels like..........

Would you like me to oh oh oh order one?

Yeah, just me.

World's first robot hotel massacres half of its robot staff

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Re: The room doll was removed

Not getting frisky with silicon?

As a Troll I resent that.

Dozens of .gov HTTPS certs expire, webpages offline, FBI on ice, IT security slows... Yup, it's day 20 of Trump's govt shutdown

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Re: Comparison

The proposition seems to be that ANYTHING however marginal or trivial that is promised by a Presidential candidate during campaigning should automatically become law if that candidate is elected?

The President was elected on those promises so they should all be enshrined in law regardless, right?


What if the candidate promises to do good things too numerous to mention? Because if I say that they are good then they are GOOD! Trust me on this one.

Logically this doesn't seem to work. Unless you are electing a dictator in which case you don't need the other elected representatives.

xHamster reports spike in UK users getting their five-knuckle shuffle on before pr0n age checks

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Re: I don't think that's how it goes, though

I can't find condoms anywhere.

Have you tried Boots?






Yes, but it all runs out of the lace holes.

Thank you. I'm here all week.

CES flicks the off switch on massager award… and causes a buzz

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No dildo no cry....

The bit so far not referred to was that in previous years there had been male orientated sex toys, including (allegedly) VR porn and sex dolls.

So claims of discrimination seem justified.

Encryption? This time it'll be usable, Thunderbird promises

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Re: @AC - How To Do Encryption IN THE REAL WORLD

Public keys are asymmetric.

Asymmetric encryption and decryption is inefficient, and is generally only used for signing and for encryption/decryption of symmetric keys which are used for bulk encryption.

PKI the clue is in the name. Public Key Infrastructure. Hence asymmetric key distribution.

Heard the one where the boss calls in an Oracle consultant who couldn't fix the database?

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Network tests

Not me but some colleagues were given a very large user test file to send over the demonstration network.

Much confusion when the transmission seemed to take a couple of seconds.

Turned out the file was the same pattern repeated many times and the comms kit had link compression enabled. So what was sent was the pattern and the number of instances.

Oxford startup magics up metamaterials for next-gen charging

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Niche use case

If you have a working USB port then why do you need this wireless charging?

It comes into its own when you drop the device and it lands on the USB plug and buggers the internal connection.

I thoughts I had been robbed when I bought the charging stand for my Sony Xperia tablet and found that it blanked off the USB port when charging through a couple of external contacts. I thought I could connect USB devices and use it like a little PC.

A few years later and an accidental breaking of the USB port and I can still charge it. Saving me from a tech refresh (or a repair which may or may not work). I know you can prise the back off and get at the internals but long experience suggest that when you go down that route you end up with new and different problems.

DXC Technology turns to BT Security to nab its infosec bossman

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Almost Microsoft

Embrace, Contract, Extinguish.

Dixons Carphone smarting from £440m loss as it writes down goodwill on mobile biz

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Paris Hilton

Unexplained attraction

For some weird reason (probably the colour scheme) I feel more comfortable in CFW shops than other more garish stores,

Given that, the sales force are usually seriously thick but that often comes with a box shifting operation with slim margins. Not much sign of the arts graduates who are allegedly selling fries in McDonald's.

My purchases won't keep them afloat, though. From memory it was a MiFi some years back when both phones couldn't get data service, and recently a £15 handset for minimum functionality voice and text.

Currys/PC World is now one of the very few places where you can see/touch/feel white goods and they usually have at least one competitive offer.

Also good for working out which laptop size and layout works for you, if this is your first laptop (took a friend in for a once in 10 years purchase).

Phones and PCs are something of a dead area for consumers now anyway as they are "good enough" until something breaks.

LG's beer-making bot singlehandedly sucks all fun, boffinry from home brewing

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Time and Money

Back in the day we seemed to have far more time than money. Made wine and beer in large quantities.

Then came children which did away with much of the spare time.

These days we can afford to buy enough wine and beer so the long term effort and disruption required to produce buckets of alcoholic beverage don't seem worth it anymore.

I thought home brewing had more or less died out with cheap supermarket booze so it is good to see it still going. I just need to find someone who wants to buy a job lot of old brewing kit.

Now you, too, can snoop on mobe users from 3G to 5G with a Raspberry Pi and €1,100 of gizmos

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Paris Hilton

Smartcard reader?

Doesn't that imply that you also need a smartcard?

If so, which one and why?

Apple in another dust-up with its fans: iMacs, MacBooks lack filters, choke on grime – lawsuit

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Long, long ago.I was involved in the support of a new line of Unix machines.

They all came with nice air filters.

Not for long once it was realised we were having more failures from blocked air filters than from internal dust and fluff.

Sorry, we haven't ACLU what happened in sealed 'Facebook decryption' case, but let's find out

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Obviously a rent girl.

Q: If Pesky Pepper had a peek at patient papers, at how many patient papers did Pesky Pepper peek? A: 231

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Obviously didn't include the audit trail.

NHS supplier that holds 40 million UK patient records: AWS is our new cloud-based platform

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Someone else's computer

Is still a computer on the Internet.

I don't see how moving to a cloud makes any difference in ease of communication and integration.

In fact, it shouldn't.

Samsung's graphene batteries promise to charge five times faster – without exploding

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Re: Still not what customers really want

A phone that lasted a day and charged in two minutes would do me. It would be trivial to couple it to a charger for a couple of minutes to keep it topped up.

Only an issue if you spend your life away from electricity.

So not most 1st world customers.

Take my advice: The only safe ID is a fake ID

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A different name for every site?

Sadly, after a while it poses similar problems to having a different password for every site. You end up having to keep complex records to remember who you are for sites which you only visit every month or so.

I assume you would end up being Nidea, Ivor on the vast number of sites, and only maintain discreet aliases for the sites you frequent on a weekly basis.

Next up, a password manager upgrades to a full identity manager.

Anonymous because......then again why bother?

Hunt for Planet X finds yet another planetoid, just not the right one

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Paris Hilton

Doing my head in.

At the furthest distance from Planet X the gravitational pull must be minimal. Inverse square and all that.

Why doesn't it just keep on going?

Want some of that sweet government contract money? Obama's CIO gives tips to land deals with Uncle Sam

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Single malt and steak dinner?

Is that a special thing?

I've got steak in the fridge and a range of single malts in the cupboard so does that make me special? In a nice way, of course.

These days my boat is more likely to be floated by something I wouldn't cook for myself.

I assume doubly so for movers and shakers.

Oh, and if you haven't helped to write the Invitation to Tender then you shouldn't waste your time bidding. You aren't close enough to the customer to understand the requirements.

Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

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Re: Too many apps

Never follow a stream or gully.

It will take the shortest and easiest route down which is often vertical.

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Re: Hahaha...hard to make walking expensive

Walking boots £250.

Waterproof jacket possibly with fleece included £250.

Waterproof trousers with multiple pockets. Say £125.

Shirt. Oh, go on, to you £85.

Need a small rucksack? Hat? Walking poles? GPS?

Not hard to spend a grand or so, especially if you are a badge fairy who loves North Face.

Microsoft: We busted Russian Fancy Bear disinfo websites

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Black Helicopters

Heard this on the radio as well.

As others have said, not sure why Microsoft are policing the Internet in this way.

Unless MS$ is now a TLA.

Scam alert: No, hackers don't have webcam vids of you enjoying p0rno. Don't give them any $$s

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Can I have a Copy please?

Only my partners and the goat have said they would like to watch.

Trump’s new ZTE tweets trump old ZTE tweets

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All this vitriol

Nobody mentions a second term. At the moment I wouldn't bet against it.

Lawyers for Marcus Hutchins: His 'I made malware' jail phone call isn't proper evidence

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Big Brother


"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, do you wish to speak to me?”

What I don't see is anything that says " Oh, and by the way, 'speak to me' includes anything you say to absolutely anybody at any time including over the phone. Oh, we might bug you talking to your lawyer but we can't use this directly as evidence."

A literal minded computer geek without direct experience of USA law could well not have realised that giving a Miranda included the right to tap phone calls to use as evidence.


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