* Posts by Rafael #872397

59 posts • joined 10 Feb 2017

Page:

My hoard of obsolete hardware might be useful… one day

Rafael #872397
Windows

Computer Archaeology

I work in the CS department of a university in a large, coffee-and-samba oriented country that shall remain unnamed.

Some of the grad students used to have a large metal cabinet as a divisor in their shared office. Besides being festooned with stickers and year-old notes nobody had they keys for it -- they just assumed it was a convenient piece of metal used to hid their screens from others' views.

When we changed offices we had to move it, and nobody claimed ownership. Being curious and irresponsible, I decided to apply the adequate amount of force to open the doors. Inside there were a bunch of SCSI cables and terminators, 8mm tape drives for a backup driver, a huge box of SIMMs (total amount of memory: < 2gb), random pieces of SUN gear, lots of ZIP disks and drives and a box of 8-inch floppy disks.

Shame on me, I kept it all. The 8-inch floppy disks are a funny conversation starter (hey, babe, want to see my 8-incher) and also a embarrassing conversation stopper (either "huh...." or "how old are you again?")

17
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Chinese biz baron wants to shove his artificial moon where the sun doesn't shine – literally

Rafael #872397

Re: The silver lining

And in at least two Simpsons' episodes?

3
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Finally. The palm-sized Palm phone is back. And it will, er, save you from your real smartphone

Rafael #872397
Thumb Up

Re: Nothing like trashing a product

Ah. El Reg Commentards. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

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On the first day of Christmas my true love gave me tea... pigs-in-blankets-flavoured tea

Rafael #872397

Re: Worship the Holy Potato! Give thanks for it's Mighty Deliciousity!

ALL HAIL THE HOLY POTATO.

Not a big fan of the vegetable, but a sucker for pseudo-religious fake frenzy.

2
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Android Phones are 10: For once, Google won fair and square

Rafael #872397
Pint

Re: You're making the common mistake of thinking others think like you do.

Upbeered.

2
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Data apocalypse is coming unless you buy AI, declares AI biz

Rafael #872397
Trollface

Re: Can someone explain exactly what is "Intelligent" about these A.I. Systems?

They're organic, and gluten-free. Lot's of fiber on those AI, yessir. And DevOps!

1
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Microsoft bids adieu to inky fingers with whiteboard app

Rafael #872397
Trollface

Re:But how will Office 365 facilitate this beveration?

You'ved misspelered 'bomination.

9
1

Facebook, Google, Microsoft scolded for tricking people into spilling their private info

Rafael #872397
Mushroom

Re: They missed the real bad-guys

The real bad guys are those who design complex forms with the buttons "Submit" and "Cancel" very close to each other. Click "Cancel" by mistake and then you have to enter everything again.

Won't somebody think about the children and the fat-fingered users such as myself?

5
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Buttonless and port-free: Expect the next iPhone to be as smooth as a baby's bum

Rafael #872397
Trollface

..charging without ever removing the phone from your pocket...

Comin' up next on The Violence Channel: An all-new "Ow, My Balls!"

18
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Oracle's new Java SE subs: Code and support for $25/processor/month

Rafael #872397
Devil

Re: Thank god we migrated...

Yeah, what could possibly go wrong?

12
1

Shatner's solar-powered Bitcoin gambit wouldn't power a deflector shield

Rafael #872397
Trollface

...has graciously put aside his well-documented disdain of cryptocurrencies...

So, either "promote us or we cut your salary" or "we will pay more to do that"?

Picard would never do this!

(run for cover)

2
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Machine learning for dummies: You needn't go back to uni to use it

Rafael #872397
Stop

This is no doubt a noble calling, but is it what industry actually needs?

I guess most of the professors and researchers ("the noble calling") are not really concerned about what the industry actually needs.

Weird, huh?

There are plenty of blogs, videos, tutorials, relentlessly advertised conferences that seems to happen all the time (cough cough) that will teach "just what the industry needs", with different levels of abstraction/details/dumbing down/uselessness caused by choosing a single language or platform which API already changed in two months. Pick one, or several. And let academia do what academia ought to be doing: expanding the frontiers.

5
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Agile development exposed as techie superstition

Rafael #872397
Coat

Re: Agile is b*llocks. Any non-idiot knows this.

Utter brilliant; I'll definitely be ripping off your comment and will randomly throwing it into polite conversation.

Great idea!

Nice sermon, Reverend, but 'using the cloud' is nothing more than putting your balls in someone else's vice and hoping they know which way to twist the handle.

Sorry.

9
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Microsoft reckons devs would like an AI Clippy to help them write code

Rafael #872397
Go

Re: #Nostalgia

This is more than 10 years old and it still deserves a chuckle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUvcYP859fg

9
3

Furious gunwoman opens fire at YouTube HQ, three people shot

Rafael #872397
Pint

@The Oncoming Scorn

You have at this moment 42 upvotes. I cannot dare to add another, so here's something else:

0
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One solution to wreck privacy-hating websites: Flood them with bogus info using browser tools

Rafael #872397
Trollface

effectively flooding their databases with garbage

From what I see in FaceBook and Twitter, it is working already!

52
1

There's more to blockchain than dodgy cryptocurrencies

Rafael #872397

There's more to blockchain than dodgy cryptocurrencies

There are CryptoKitties.

7
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Google powers up latest app it'll cancel in two years: Hangouts Chat

Rafael #872397
Coffee/keyboard

Re: "Hangouts chat"

diversity-providing people -- thanks!

1
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Look out, Wiki-geeks. Now Google trains AI to write Wikipedia articles

Rafael #872397

It’s impossible to read and keep up with everything.

Why would we want to keep up with everything? I used to read at least the headers of several online news sites, then noticed that except for op-eds most are copied from each other. Same with cats' memes.

2
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You dopes! US state's pot dealer database pwned after security goes up in smoke

Rafael #872397
Trollface

Re: Serves them right

Dude. Mellow out, like. Duuuuuuuuude!

6
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It's been 50 years since those damn dirty apes took the planet by storm

Rafael #872397
Happy

Spoof

Aw, come ON!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOeUXEpxzcc

5
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South Wales cops crow about facial recognition arrests on social media

Rafael #872397
Joke

Suspect was armed and dangerous

Watch out, he has a Nokia on his pocket!

12
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Boffins foresee most software written by machines in 2040

Rafael #872397
Holmes

Re: In 20 years' time it'll be 20 years in the future too.

I predict that in 20 years' time whoever is making money out of predictions will still be making money out of predictions.

9
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AI taught to beat Sudoku puzzles. Now how about a time machine to 2005?

Rafael #872397
Pint

Re: Product of the AI hype

@Cowboy Bob: awesome! Have an upvote.

0
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Rafael #872397

Re: Been there done that

Same here -- used Sudoku to learn how to use a constraint programming library. Also used neural networks to classify images and time series. Can't see the advantage in using neural networks to solve Sudokus unless the purpose is to brag about "using neural networks to solve Sudokus".

I also seem to recall that either a Sudoku is solvable with 100% "accuracy" or it has more than one solution. It is possible to devise Sudokus that have only one solution and as few clues as possible (17: https://www.technologyreview.com/s/426554/mathematicians-solve-minimum-sudoku-problem/)

9
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Fake news ‘as a service’ booming among cybercrooks

Rafael #872397

"news"

Doesn't this also show the current trend regarding 'news' as nothing more than rehashing gossip and hear-say?

And posting tweets of random users as source of news? At least El Reg stopped doing that (right?). CNN, on the other hand...

0
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Amazon to make multiple Lord of the Rings prequel TV series

Rafael #872397

Re: second highest-selling fantasy series

Harry Potter? Just buy it and create a mix fantasy+magic+fake reality TV show. Just retcon the hell out of it to make the characters more relatable to certain audiences.

Next week:

Ron: Snape is such a bastard!

Hermione: I totally saw him spitting in your potions.

(camera shows Harry scratching his back with his wand)

4
1

US judge orders Sci-Hub be excised from the internet

Rafael #872397

Re: I am wondering just how much it costs to publish a scientific journal

So you need a web server with some backup strategy, a couple of high level editors, and someone to liaise with the peer reviewers.

You don't really need all this. Publish or perish allowed all this to happen, and I don't see a fix.

7
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Another day, another cryptocurrency miner lurking in a Google Chrome extension

Rafael #872397

Re: As long as I am asked

AND I agree to the terms.

Let's not think that, as the article says, ...There's nothing intrinsically malicious with software harvesting spare CPU cycles for stuff... -- it is my CPU.

9
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Star Wars: Big Euro cinema group can't handle demand for tickets to new flick

Rafael #872397
Go

Re: spoilerific

There's a new character that appears to be pasted from the Raving Rabbids games.

8
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Video games used to be an escape. Now not even they are safe from ads

Rafael #872397

Re: "watched" hundreds of video ads

You're lucky. For some reason I've "watched" hundred times the same two ads.

I wonder if the criminals that does this kind of "watch this video to get to the next level" ad had ever watched them. Even if the ad worked on the first time and I rushed to buy the "product", seeing the same damn video afterwards for forty times in a row is sort of annoying.

3
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Twitter to upgrade from micro-blogging to milli-blogging with 280 chars

Rafael #872397
Facepalm

...Japanese, Korean, and Chinese you can convey about double the amount of information in one character...

I don't think you understand how languages (or different alphabets/character sets) work.

あほ。

5
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Bill Gates says he'd do CTRL-ALT-DEL with one key if given the chance to go back through time

Rafael #872397
Go

Re: rotating key switch and flip up cover?

Feh! Use punch cards. Insert them in several openings of the computer until they disconnect a wire or catch fire.

I *demand* a "get off my lawn" icon, and a nap.

13
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Would you get in a one-man quadcopter air taxi?

Rafael #872397
Paris Hilton

...get into the drone when it arrives,...

Just out of curiosity, will it arrive in the middle of the street? At the sidewalk? At the nearest helipad or airport? Will it let me out where I want to be or at the "nearest convenient location", several kilometers away?

12
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Your boss asks you to run the 'cloud project': Ever-changing wish lists, packs of 'ideas'... and 1 deadline

Rafael #872397
Coffee/keyboard

Re: molest lampposts in their off hours

Damn you!

14
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Western Digital has cloudified the NAS and shoved it in a trendy box

Rafael #872397

Re: Deja Vu

I have one 4T My Cloud. You can disable Internet access to it, and use it as a NAS.

Performance sucks hairy camel balls, though. Once they had a firmware update that required access to it from a local network, at that time I was on the other side of the world and didn't return for weeks.

WD people were "aware of some issues" and "trying to solve them", but I lost interest. Won't buy this one.

3
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Terry Pratchett's unfinished works flattened by steamroller

Rafael #872397
Pint

Re: I'm touched by the weirdness of this request...

OP here -- thanks for all the suggestions! I've checked and there are translations of several Pratchett books to Portuguese (for the young kids), and a good selection of e-books too (for me, eyes are not what they used to be).

Thanks again!

4
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Rafael #872397
Pint

I'm touched by the weirdness of this request...

... but never had the chance to read his work*. Is there a suggested reading order?

*Before any of you scream "Burn the heathen!!!1!": I am not a native speaker, and the selection of translated fiction books available when I was young was meager. Now I can read those in English, and my teen kids already enjoy books from Gaiman, we would like to see what we've missed all those years.

52
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Boffin rediscovers 1960s attempt to write fiction with computers

Rafael #872397

Re: Probably the software was bought by Hollywood....

Come on, Hollywood may resurrect Dog, or explain it was a clone, or it was all a dream, or do any number of prequels on the origin of Dog. Or Cat may want to avenge Dog.

I just hope George Lucas or Michael Bay are not reading this.

12
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Boffins bust AI with corrupted training data

Rafael #872397

Re: Hanlon's razor

I'm not sure I understand all facets of the issue, but if input is not sanitized and the model cannot be evaluated or audited why bother with (complex) AI to create backdoors? A simple "if (Putin) then grant access" could do the same harm.

3
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Nasty firmware update butchers Samsung smart TVs so bad, they have to be repaired

Rafael #872397
Mushroom

This, unsurprisingly, left many set owners fuming.

So, first the phones, then the washing machines, now the owners are going to explode too?

10
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UK.gov is hiring IT bods with skills in ... Windows Vista?!

Rafael #872397
Windows

Excellent!

If this continues, in a few years my mad Turbo Prolog skillz will be worth millions!

And they called me mad! Muhahahahahahahaha.

23
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Are Asimov's laws enough to stop AI stomping humanity?

Rafael #872397

Are Asimov's laws enough to stop AI stomping humanity?

I dunno -- is Betteridge's law of headlines enough to stop speculation about what is and what isn't real AI?

11
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Parents claim Disney gobbled up kids' info through mobile games

Rafael #872397

Re: Is it just me or is Mickey Mouse completely, totally and utterly unfunny?

Annoying as hell too. Donald Duck, on the other hand...

8
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House fire, walk with me: Kodipocalypse now includes conflagration

Rafael #872397
Trollface

Re: Will these boxes also....

- make me go blind

Depends on the type of movie you're watching.

5
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How to avoid getting hoodwinked by a DevOps hustler

Rafael #872397
Trollface

If they’re a 'DevOps Expert', they probably aren’t

"They" could always make some money giving DevOps lectures and seminars for the gullible!

13
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Fear the dentist? Strap on some nerd goggles

Rafael #872397
Megaphone

@Dr. Ellen

Anything my dentist asks is answered with "aghhshsmnghhfh" and sometimes a string of droll. This helps me to keep focused in the sheer panic I feel whenever I had to go to the dentist, even to do payments (as equally painful as the procedures).

Where is my painless laser drill I was promised on the 70s? And my flying car? Can I at least get a "where is my X" icon?

1
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Boeing preps pilotless passenger flights – once it has solved the Sully problem, of course

Rafael #872397

Re: money making opportunity

The days of listening to the captain speaking on a flight may be numbered, according to Boeing.

Hi folks, this is your artificial pilot recording speaking, and, since you can't bring laptops and tablets inside the cabin anymore I will, for the length of this flight, interrupt the feeble excuse for entertainment we provided to let you know about exciting offers our company's affiliates have just for you. Brought To You By Carl's Jr.

3
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Live blog: Fired FBI boss spills the beans to US Senate committee

Rafael #872397
Headmaster

Re: As it traditional

It? First time hear about. Agree though. Think good idea.

0
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So despite all the cash ploughed into big data, no one knows how to make it profitable

Rafael #872397

Re: Big data profits?

I bet hardware sales are blooming! See, there's profit right there.

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