* Posts by Korev

1912 posts • joined 26 Aug 2016

'I crashed AOL for 19 hours and messed up global email for a week'

Korev Silver badge
Korev Silver badge
Pint

I hope all the Amazonians were grateful and you were properly rewarded -->

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Devil

The guys with round wheels were unbearably smug too....

the work of the devil them -->

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Pirate

In the late 90s there were a couple of cars in Truro, Cornwall which had email addresses printed in a very large font on. I guess they must have thought they were the coolest guys on the planet :)

As Penzance isn't far away -->

Apple leak: If you leak from Apple, we'll have you arrested, says Apple

Korev Silver badge

Re: Another View

In the UK it'd be a "Civil" matter so the Cops wouldn't get involved*, but you'd get your behind sued off in count.

*I assume that this would be different for someone working for BAE Systems etc. working on Defence contracts

UK pub chain Wetherspoons' last call: ♫ Just a spoonful of Twitter – let's pull social media down ♫

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Coat

Re: Ever-shrinking menu options

Maybe they need to curry someone's favour

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In what could in no way be perceived as a publicity stunt, he said: "It’s becoming increasingly obvious that people spend too much time on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook, and struggle to control the compulsion.

You mean they're spending time doing things that don't involve going to "not as cheap as they used to be" pubs?

If they were really concerned they could put up a Faraday cage around each branch to stop people posting to social media from their pubs...

Small UK firms laying fibre put BT's Openreach to shame – report

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Coat

Re: Rome wasn't built in a day

I wonder if more fibre would cure this blockage

The first rule of maths class: Don't start a fight club

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Joke

There has to be a limit though...

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Joke

Trigonometry

Did they "Tan his hide"?

UK defines Cyber DEFCON 1, 2 and 3, though of course doesn't call it that

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Joke

Re: shortform/acronyms

What happens if the bikini code is yellow & polkadot? I guess it'd only be teeny weeny so would be easy to miss...

Was April 10th 'Add storage features to enterprise OSes day'?

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Joke

I'd expect you'd make to make a Mayday call if you did this

It's April 2018, and we've had to sit on this Windows 10 Spring Creators Update headline for days

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FAIL

Antipodean edition?

It's on the spring for the Northern hemisphere; why do they insist on misnaming it for the other half of the planet... And don't get me started on calling the previous update "fall" instead of autumn!

El Reg needs you – to help build an automated beer-transporting robot

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Pint

Robot name

Any chance the robot could be called Lester in honour of the Great Hack who'd have loved this project?

Facebook admits: Apps were given users' permission to go into their inboxes

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Joke

I don't think he'll be Turing human any time soon...

Penis pothole protester: Cambridge's 'Wanksy' art shows feted

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Childcatcher

Re: Obscene? Nah.

I hope they never take their kids anywhere near here

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Coat

Yep, we should erect something to stop it happening

Airbus plans beds in passenger plane cargo holds

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Virgin do in Upper Class too.

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Stop

Re: "They ship livestock in..." [the cargo hold of aircraft]

More the abrupt stop at the end of said descent

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Virgin used to have inflight massages and beauty "treatments" in Upper Class

Fear the Reaper: Man hospitalised after eating red hot chilli pepper

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Pint

Re: Not the worst of it

" anything with chunks of real chilli can get a bit "Chuck Berry""

Johnny Cash Shirley?

Yes, you're correct

A virtual pint for you -->

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Coat

Re: Nominative Determinism?

Naga suppositories will be a legal requirement for the over 50s.

Well, old people do like to overheat their homes; I guess this will stop them getting chilli

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Mushroom

Re: Not the worst of it

I find it's the other way round. If the heat is from sauces or powder then it's no problem on the way out; anything with chunks of real chilli can get a bit "Chuck Berry"

Imagine you're having a CT scan and malware alters the radiation levels – it's doable

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Terminator

Re: WannaCry was a wake-up call for healthcare

I don't think the OS matters in this scenario. It seems obvious to me that all these medical instrument controllers should be isolated from the rest of the network (with some proxy to get information like patient name in and the data out).

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Facepalm

Last autumn I stay in a hotel in Athens and decided that reading by the pool would be a nice way to spend an afternoon. I put my room key card on top of my Kindle which has a magnetic case; I ended up have to go to the reception in rather wet swimming gear to get back into my room...

German sauna drags punters to court over naked truth

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Coat

Did the solicitors remove their briefs?

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Joke

Re: What happens in Sinsheim ..

Bavarian Frau? What's she München on?

Police chief wants citizens to bring 'net oligarchs to heel

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Re: Actually

The Internet has a better record of uncovering Crime and Wrongdoing than PC Plod's

You mean like misidentifying the Boston Bomber?

There's security – then there's barbed wire-laced pains in the arse

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Thumb Up

HR Issue

I'm pleased to see that IT Security is seen in this article as an HR issue. Opening a door and letting a stranger with malicious intent would result in he/she being faced with disciplinary issues; I don't see how handing over your login to a webpage is any different...

Cisco mess from 2017 becomes tool for state-sponsored infrastructure attacks and defacements

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WTF?

Question

Why do people have switches facing the Internet, shouldn't they be firewalled off?

Ass-troplastic! Printing parts from p.. er... human waste

Korev Silver badge
Childcatcher

"Poop" is an even more annoying word

Birds can feel Earth's magnetic fields? Yeah, that might fly. Bioboffins find vital sense proteins

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Coat

Re: Magnetic Puns?

It's a steel!

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Coat

Wren they use this to help Robin houses, I think we should Thrush in to stop it...

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Joke

Strange, I thought they just winged it

My PC makes ‘negative energy waves’, said user, then demanded fix

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Thumb Up

Re: Real waves

Sort of glad I dont work there any more.

Helping out someone with a disability is surely a good thing though.

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Coat

Re: Reverse the polarity!

It's probably best not to mention alternating current at that point; it would probably Hertz their poor little brains...

Korev Silver badge

I know one person who trained themselves to use a mouse with their left hand (it took them a week, they tell me) so they could swap every hour.

I had some tendonitis in my fingers a few years ago from [computer] mice and also the automated pipettes in cell culture. I started switching hands quite often for both tasks which appeared to sort it.

Korev Silver badge
Joke

Re: bluetooth with Win10 is an iffy affair

USB? What is this trickery? PS/2* has much nicer round plugs...

*Seriously, my home keyboard has a PS/2 port, it was made in the days when keyboards didn't fall apart in a couple of seconds...

Facebook can’t count, says Cambridge Analytica

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Terminator

Some of the bots were granted permission by the "suckers" to have full access to their account which enabled the bots to go through their friends' profiles too.

*Thunk* No worries, the UPS should spin up. Oh cool, it's in bypass mode

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Coat

Re: All your eggs in one voip

Reminds me of the time when a satellite office network failed.

Well, it's very hard to string fibre up into orbit.

Mine's the spacesuit -->

Shhh! Don’t tell KillBots the UN’s about to debate which ones to ban

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Terminator

find . -name "Sarah Connor"

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Joke

Re: "uncivilised way to kill people"

With F-F-Fava beans and Chianti

Danish Navy expert finds no trace of exhaust gas in private submarine

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Re: Has he ever come up with a story ...

For those who don't know what we're on about... (SFW).

And yes that's "Mr Bean"

And yes that's "Dr House"

Korev Silver badge

Re: Has he ever come up with a story ...

Wibble

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Realistically, who would want to buy a murder scene?

As Zuck apologizes again... Facebook admits 'most' of its 2bn+ users may have had public profiles slurped by bots

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Pint

Re: Zuckerberg

"tossmuppet"

Love it!

'Every little helps'... unless you want email: Tesco to kill free service

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Gimp

Re: Damn

Dibs on anonymous.coward@vulturecentral.com!

I'd go for moderatrix@vulturecentral.com, but I suspect she'd come for me and my time on this planet would be short....

iOS 11.3 update throws Jamf-managed iStuffs into a loop.. into a loop.. into a loop... into a...

Korev Silver badge
Terminator

Was this done for the beta versions? I'd assume that companies like Jamf, Mobileiron etc would test the betas with their software; especially because IOS devices nag the users to update.

Korev Silver badge

Admittedly n=1 but my work phone hasn't had any issues.

I haven't heard of any colleagues having problems either.

UK regulator bans slasher-flick parody ad for OnePlus 5 mobe

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: Have you ever seen Thomas the Tank Engine?

You're a very bad man... But I'm not going to pretend I didn't find it funny...

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