* Posts by Korev

1826 posts • joined 26 Aug 2016

MIT boffins build rubber robot, invade privacy of unsuspecting sealife

Korev
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Management

Do they manage the robot using a conSole?

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IBM claims its machine learning library is 46x faster than TensorFlow

Korev
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Boffin

Optimised hardware vs commodity cloud

It's not surprising that tuned HPC-type hardware running on bare metal will beat some virtualised systems in the cloud. It would have been more interesting to have compared Xeon/GPU Vs Power9/GPU Vs Xeon/Phi etc.

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You must be yolking: English pub to launch eggstravagent Yorkshire pudding

Korev
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What are you rabbiting on about?

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Korev
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Re: Calories?

"I'm expecting close to 5 figures."

You're already making excuses to chicken out of eating one

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Korev
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Re: Interesting....

Is that the bucket with the wings

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Korev
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Re: Cost?

Thinking about it, they may just give them away for free(range)

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Korev
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Joke

Cost?

All those puns and you don't say how much we'll have to shell out for one...

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British Level 4 driverless pods are whizzing along ... er, a London path

Korev
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Facepalm

Cyclists

In reality, as everyone knows, people and cyclists alike go wherever they please.

You're implying that cyclists aren't people!

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What's going great for Oracle? Cloud. What's not great? Just about everything else

Korev
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Re: Can't see past the cloud

The funny thing about Sun and the cloud is that they had a cloud-like product which was arguably ahead of its time.

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Breaking up is hard to do: Airbus, new bae Google and clinging on to Microsoft's 'solutions'

Korev
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Black Helicopters

Data leaks

I wonder how long it'll be until someone send/saves something confidential through the Google suite instead of the on-prem MS Office. I suspect a low number of days...

Seems appropriate for Airbus -->

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Nest reveals the first truly connected home

Korev
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Re: Nonsense detected

"Yeah, because yelling "HEY ALEXA, PLEASE ADJUST THE ROOM TEMPERATURE TO 72 DEGREES""

But 72c will cause burns

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Nip/Tug: Plastic surgeon accused of mid-surgery 'hardcore' smut binge

Korev
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Procedure?

Was he performing a facial at the time?

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Neural networks whip fleshbag butt at identifying craters

Korev
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Yep, some people are lunar-tics

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Hello, Spotify? Are you on? Perils and pratfalls of own-brand hardware

Korev
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Re: How many

Yep. And they have their own streaming services too.

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Office junior had one job: Tearing perforated bits off tractor-feed dot matrix printer paper

Korev
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Pint

Re: "Has a foreign body caused you grief?"

"Oh you're so funny."

I said "Yeah?

Well I can't see anyone else smiling in here.

cos there's no rum ad coca-cola icon -->

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Taxpayers chuck burnt-out Bongs* millions of pounds to 'decelerate'

Korev
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Mushroom

Certainly Mr Barley...

That's well weapon -->

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OK, deep breath, relax... Let's have a sober look at these 'ere annoying AMD chip security flaws

Korev
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Re: Odiferous Rodent

Don't forget the significant funding from the NSA, Mossad and all the other usual suspects who just love, really love backdoors.

If this is the case then why would they publicise the flaws?

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Samba settings SNAFU lets any user change admin passwords

Korev
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"My coffee is cold" - "it's because of linux"

Well Java on Linux isn't that great...

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It's Pi day: Care to stuff a brand new Raspberry one in your wallet?

Korev
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Yep. Their blog claims 315Mb/s which is still thrice the speed of the previous model.

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Korev
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Dates

"assuming you live in a country that insists on writing dates in the frankly barking mad MM/DD format"

A pint for the author -->

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Uni IT man stole £22k of Macs to pay for smack

Korev
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Sounds like he was a hardCore addict

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Finland government buys a slice of Nokia

Korev
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We'd all sing "Hard Rock Hallelujah!" with happiness

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IBM thinks Notes and Domino can rise again

Korev
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Language

Modern languages/tools like Node.js? Pah, surely C# is the only thing you should programme Notes in

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Elon Musk invents bus stop, waits for applause, internet LOLs

Korev
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Re: Coming soon...

"Can you ride tandem?"

Yes, NonStop

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Korev
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Re: What goes down...

"How about going up instead of down? No messy tunnel boring, no slow lifts to wait for. You could call it ... an Airbus."

Love it -->

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Developer mistakenly deleted data - so thoroughly nobody could pin it on him!

Korev
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Headmaster

Re: That's not how that works

It basically scans the file system and then creates a whole chain of rm commands. If you try to run it on too many files then it bombs out with an error.

You can ask me how I know this, but now how that many small files were written to the filesystem in the first place...

Won't somebody think of the inodes -->

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Korev
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Re: Never edit the fstab table on a production system...

Yep, fstab, a /bin, /etc

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Korev
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Re: Never edit the fstab table on a production system...

Maybe someone would make a fstab at guessing why...

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Millionaire-backed science fiction church to launch Scientology TV network

Korev
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Joke

Adverts for holidays

Does anyone think the station will have adverts for Tom Cruises?

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Good news: Apple designs a notebook keyboard that doesn't suck

Korev
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Holmes

"Apple designs a notebook keyboard that doesn't suck"

You mean they've put the " on the 2 on their UK keyboards at last?

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Server sales dead? No sir, not in Q4

Korev
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"Branded vendors made hay while sun shone"

Sadly not since Oracle bought them...

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DVLA denies driving licence processing site is a security 'car crash'

Korev
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Joke

Would this lead to...

...Drive by attacks to the browser?

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Will the defendant please rise? Utah State Bar hunts for sender of topless email

Korev
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Re: "to the breast of their knowledge"

A cup of tea for them!

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Administrator PwC chops Maplin staff

Korev
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Yep, I'm feeling wired now...

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IBM's homomorphic encryption accelerated to run 75 times faster

Korev
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Re: Am I the only one who read that as

"Strangely, I read it as "homeopathic."

I remember an edition of AbFab where Eddie's mum called them that :)

Mine's the Gucci one, darling -->

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Korev
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Re: Am I the only one who read that as

You've raised the gay bar with that...

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Korev
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Boffin

More please IBM

This is the kind of research that used to make IBM great; please do more of it.

And don't let your salepeople muck it up by trying to force Bluemix / Power on everyone...

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Sci-tech wants skilled worker cap on PhD and shortage jobs scrapped

Korev
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Re: I wonder....

£55k is roughly twice the UK average wage and would put a person in the top 10% of UK earners. I suspect that most people in the UK don't realise how low the salaries actually are especially once the high living costs have been taken into account.

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Korev
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Unhappy

£55k

For instance, MP Stuart McDonald said in parliament last month that in December 2017, people essentially had to have a salary of £55,000 or above to qualify for a certificate.

Which pretty much rules out most science jobs; not to mention other useful people like teachers, junior doctors etc.

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Netflix could pwn 2020s IT security – they need only reach out and take

Korev
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Netflix as a vendor

The idea of Netflix as an IT vendor is weird, but you could say the same about a certain bookseller....

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Ethernet sales growing, but routing's been routed by software

Korev
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Joke

So you're saying that people are making the switch away from hardware because of software, it's good to have that on the routing table...

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VMware's cloud migration play beams down whole data centres

Korev
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Re: Can it migrate it back?

A very good question

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Ocado to stock cannabidiol-infused water

Korev
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Partnership

Is it a joint venture between Ocado and Love Hemp?

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Korev
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I guess it'd be good for their canabusiness

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Suspected drug dealer who refused to poo for 46 DAYS released... on bail

Korev
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Re: Ah well...

It saves on the paperwork, I suppose.

Of the Andrex variety?

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Pasties in SPAAAAACE: Cornwall hopes for slice of £50m spaceport cash

Korev
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Joke

If they keep going a bit longer then the Bloodhound will "launch horizontally" over Watergate Bay

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Korev
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Mushroom

Re: "delicious, meat-filled pasties"

You're being let off lightly... Hell hath no fury like when a Cornishman has his pasties contaminated...

There's a reason why the Americans don't keep any of these in Cornwall any more -->

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Korev
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Childcatcher

Re: Remind me

I think putting the cream on second would jam everything up

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Half the world warned 'Chinese space station will fall on you'

Korev
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Re: WEEEE

Or weee weee weee all the way home

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Korev
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"Clearly it will land in Northern France as predicted by Vitalstatistix."

If it does then they could call it an Obelix.

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