* Posts by Ian Emery

1661 posts • joined 9 Aug 2007

Prank 'Give me a raise!' email nearly lands sysadmin with dismissal

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Gimp

Lower tech than email spoofing, but.....

Many years ago, working at a large warehouse/office complex, some of us got very irritated with our useless boss call diverting all his calls to our phone.

Several plans of revenge were put into motion, but the one with the biggest impact occurred one night; while dodging the security doing rounds, we managed to access about 70-80% of all the phones in the complex and diverted them to our bosses phone. (The system wouldnt allow a diverted call to be diverted a second time).

I understand he is still trying to stop Readers Digest, Everest, CO-OP Funeral Services and a few other companies from sending him sale reps though.

(Spent another night filling in packs of Rep request cards from a trade show)

2
0

Devon County Council techies: WE KNOW IT WASN'T YOU!

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: 3rd party

In the last 5-6 years I have twice dealt with government websites (one local, one national), where the ONLY way to get them to work correctly was with obsolete versions of Internet Explorer.

The local government one wouldnt work with anything beyond IE6, the National one was slightly more advanced and could cope with IE 7,8, or 9.

However the latter was the biggest PITA, because it didnt fail until the VERY LAST entry in the form I was submitting, and then failed silently with no error message beyond a technical fault had occurred.

7
0

Bank on it: It's either legal to port-scan someone without consent or it's not, fumes researcher

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: @Ian Emery

VbV was an early example; and to this day doesnt add any security to your purchase - despite what they say.

No, as I said, I have encountered a number of scripts, some for 3rd party payment systems, some for cosmetic effects, and more than one script that doesnt appear until the transaction has supposedly finished and you are supposed to be sent to the order summery page with an order reference number.

The VERY worst was encountered in the payment system for "The Book People"; it has since been fixed, but was so bad I wouldnt use them for a whole year until it was fixed - and I highlighted the issue on several consumer forums after they failed to reply to my complaints about how insecure it was.

1
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: intent to cause harm or recklessness

What? You mean like a bank with a horse setting business's up to fail, then profiting from the seizure and selling of its assets??

Hasnt that just been through the courts??

6
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: "the scanning is done with Javascript running locally"

"Take it half a step further: the login page may not work without JS, but it is probably irrelevant for non-customers."

But that is the point with NS, you run what scripts YOU want. My bank allows various tracker scripts to run on the log in page - very bad practice, but since I auto block those trackers, Google* knows very little about me.

The single active script needed to log in is still allowed, so log in works.

I get VERY grumpy at etailers that try to introduce 3rd party scripts at the final stage of a payment process; the result is nearly always the payment failing, and my order being screwed up for hours (or days), before they clear the issue.

Sometimes it is for something eminently STUPID, like using a special font from an external source; bugger off, do it in Times or Arial, I'm not letting some unknown 3rd party into my secure session just to make the page look pretty!!!

*(Ooops)

23
0

Microsoft's cheapo Surface: Like a netbook you can't upgrade

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Nothing wrong with a netbook

Another Asus owner here, in this case a 901 with upgraded SSD.

Yeah, it is a bit slow, but it does things using Windows 7 that are VERY difficult to replicate in Android - and a PITA in Linux; which is why I keep it around, and take it with me when I travel abroad.

That, and the fact I have a HUGE laptop bag I can stuff with goodies and avoid the weigh-in drama of having 17KG of hand luggage.

2
1

Build your own NASA space rover: Here are the DIY JPL blueprints

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Space rover

I look forwards to seeing someone riding a suitably upscaled version to work one morning.

2
0

BT boosted by punters and sport – as it preps to squeeze subs harder

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Pirate

BT results boosted by consumer unit as it preps to squeeze it harder

Switching from a 9 month to an 8 month year for the "annual" price rise??

3
0

ReactOS 0.4.9 release metes out stability and self-hosting, still looks like a '90s fever dream

Ian Emery
Silver badge

I still have the 50+ disk FLOPPY install for Win95.

Doubt if they still work, but I do still have a floppy drive in my spares box - just no mobo with a suitable port.

4
2

All that dust on Mars is coming from one weird giant alien structure

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Did we all have the same thought??

Waits to see how may other Dyson posts get shown..

7
0

Fix this faxing hell! NHS told to stop hanging onto archaic tech

Ian Emery
Silver badge

The NHS isnt alone

Our local Education Authority refuses to join the 21st Century as well; until we sold up 2 years ago, we had to keep a fax machine online 24/7 as it was the ONLY way they would send voucher payment details to us for 2, 3, and 4 year old funding..

8
1

East Midlands network-sniffer wails: Openreach, fix my outage-ridden line

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Three Mistakes

Obviously chose a cheap ISP; went cheaper still by paying for a consumer package, and ignored all the evidence telling him OR only talk to the ISP's; makes you wonder how good he is at his job.

8
11

TalkTalk, UK2 sitting in a tree, not T-A-L-K-I-N-G: Hosting biz cut off after ISP broadband upgrade

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Windows

Disbelief

TT still have customers???

I am assuming that by this stage, they are all mouth breathers, as anyone with as much as a single active brain cell jumped ship a long time ago - probably ti an equally shite ISP like Plusnet.

2
1

The Notch contagion is spreading slower than phone experts thought

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: More non-Western models here, please

You have just described my last three Xiaomi phones!!! (the fourth had a removable battery, a spare for which cost me (GASP!!) £2.50).

6
0

So... where's the rest? Xiaomi walks away from IPO with less than hoped

Ian Emery
Silver badge

The hardware is great, but they ignore firmware bugs for far too long, are not listening enough to what their loyal users want, and have been pissing away the brand value on tat.

The loss of wifi mentioned above is a classic example; not a word from Xiaomi, it was left to customers to figure out what they had buggered up with the OTA; ditto the USB MFT issue earlier this year.

Yeah, I own THREE Xiaomi phones.

No, I dont own a Xiaomi unmbrella.

0
0

Automated payment machines do NOT work the same all over the world – as I found out

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: HSBC

It never used to be that way, 10 years ago, HSBC used to be the BEST for using your card overseas, but now; not only do the stiff you with TWO card fees (one of them a "foreign currency" fee), but they also use their own crappy exchange rate, which is worse than the rate you get at the Airport Travelex.

2
0

Git365. Git for Teams. Quatermass and the Git Pit. GitHub simply won't do now Microsoft has it

Ian Emery
Silver badge

MICROGIT

I have been calling it MicroGit since the day the take over was announced.

3
0

UK taxman warned it's running out of time to deliver working customs IT system by Brexit

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Berxit Or Not

I have been trying to get them to take notice of the fact that my HMRC account is corrupted since January; I have now asked if I can send my 2016/17 returns on paper, as they seem unable to even answer me, let alone fix the issue.

8
0

Koh YEAH! Apple, Samsung finally settle iPhone patent crusade

Ian Emery
Silver badge

But, but.....

But how are the lawyers going to keep their babies in Gucci disposable nappies ($12,000 each) now??

4
0

Potato, potato. Toma6to, I'm going to kill you... How a typo can turn an AI translator against us

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Nothing new here

I found that out years and years ago; multiple online translation programs converted English "bread and water" in to Russian "bad food".

Completely flummoxed my then Russian girlfriend.

3
0

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it a giant alien space cigar? Whatever it is, boffins are baffled

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Rama

We have plenty of time; they do everything in three's.

16
0

WPA3 is the magic number? Protocol refresh promises tighter Wi-Fi security

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: ROFL

You have older TPL gear?? My current AC750 has been firmware updated twice - and no reset to default.

1
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge
Coat

Waits for MicroGit to claim WPA3 update is impossible on any Win version other than 10.

17
0

Trainee techie ran away and hid after screwing up a job, literally

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Basic mechanical ability (@ Ian Emery)

I never knew there was a sequel; but then I found it was "Direct to Video".

Sorry, stinkers dont count, the WOPR is still there.

4
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Basic mechanical ability

I found my 2 y/o using my electric screw driver to take live sockets off of the wall; then later that day he started to take my bed frame apart with a ratchet spanner.

He is a qualified tool maker in the aerospace industry now.

My 5 y/o daughter is learning computer programming, I expect her to be hacking into the WOPR at NORAD any day.

19
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: What else is new?

I came into work one Monday morning, and found my parking space full of bricks.

Looking up, I could see the front of a forklift hanging out of the tower housing the lift.

Whoever had done it had just walked away, no one ever found out who he was; ditto the guy who smashed an 8" riser and left the basement 4ft deep in water.

GUS; run and staffed mostly by people who make Mr Trump look smart, honest and dedicated

7
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

I am thinking Concorde, are you??

0
1

UK.gov online dating tips: Do get consent, don't make false claims or fake profiles

Ian Emery
Silver badge

I met my wife on a dating site

However it wasnt a UK or US one, the people on there are madder than a box of frogs.

A friend asked me to be wingman for his first meeting with one woman, her bio said "athletic and attractive", she weighed about 400lbs and had more of a beard than he did.

Not that international dating sites are immune; another friend went to China to meet this hottie; the reality was so different to the studio images she had been sending, he walked straight past her at the airport.

(In the photos she was a very hot mid 40's, in reality her face appeared half melted and she looked about 90).

(No, I am not exaggerating).

2
0

Xiaomi the money? OK, here's a one beeeeellion dollar loss ahead of IPO

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Not surprised at the loss.

Click on it and you get a nice page in English, click on THAT, and you get a log in page in Chinese.

And Xiaomi lost focus in 2015, not in 2017.

They do makes some great non-core products, but they also slap their name on an awful lot of crap, low value rubbish, and that devalues the brand.

0
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Not surprised at the loss.

They have been pissing away their time with every sort of Xiaomi branded product you can think of (short of a Princess Diana Memorial colonic irrigation kit, but I bet it is on the way).

Meantime, their core phone business has really been suffering from a lack of technical and software support; which has been REALLY pissing off us long term loyal customers.

Locking down the OS, so we cannot play with custom ROMS, telling us we can ASK nicely to have then unlocked, then finding it only works if you are a fluent reader of FUCKING CHINESE is not helping.

I hope this is a wake-up call that gets them back on track, I REALLY do not want a Xiaomi umbrella or yoyo.

2
0

Actual control of Windows 10 updates (with a catch)... and more from Microsoft

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Alien

I, for one

WELCOME our new MicroGit overlords.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Yeah, right! In your dreams!!!

The name IS catchy though.

2
0

1,300 customers of Brit bank TSB defrauded due to botched IT migration

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: Another false claim...

It isnt even as if their chaotic tech infrastructure issues were new; whilst trying to open an account with them a couple of years ago, what should have been a simple hours task turned into a 3 month trial, where they lost paperwork, destroyed paperwork, sent paperwork to the wrong address (their OWN address, they got THEIR OWN ADDRESS WRONG!!!)

If it hadnt been for the fact they were the only bank willing to open an account for my wife at the time (foreign national), we would have walked after the first lost paperwork incident, but after the third lot went missing, we gave up

0
0

UK military may recruit wheezy, alcoholic keyboard warriors

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Windows

Who cares what they do, where do I sign up; I meet all the headline requirements.

natch!"

10
0

Ex-US pres Bill Clinton has written a cyber-attack pulp thriller. With James Patterson. Really

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Terrible Writer

The one and only time I have had my hands on one of his books, it was a book club bundle; it was so bad I actually sent the bundle back and cancelled.

And when I say bad, the ingredients list on a tin of beans is more enjoyable than that POS.

3
0

MH370 search ends – probably – without finding missing 777

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: The saddest thing

As much as I agree with your sentiments; everyone knows it went off course to pick up Lord Lucan and Shergar, on their way to ET's green Planet.

BTW, there were some very shady people on board that flight, so dont dismiss ALL of the conspiracy theories; some people may well not want the aircraft found.

7
8

ISP TalkTalk's Wi-Fi passwords Walk Walk thanks to Awks Awks router security hole

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Many a word, spoken in jest.........

1
0

Microsoft, Google: We've found a fourth data-leaking Meltdown-Spectre CPU hole

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Anyone wanna buy an abacus??

In stock and ready to dispatch.

12
0

RAF Air Command to take on UK military space ops

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Alien

Based on how many crew it used to take for the RN to keep a plane flying in a warzone, and the number of crew the RAF required to keep exactly the same type of aircraft flying in exactly the same warzone;

Be afraid, be VERY afraid.

600 crew is barely enough to get a pot of RAF tea going.

Hoping they will change the name to "Space Group Command", and have someone called "O'Neil" in command of the lead team.

Alien?? I think this guy rode past me on his bike last week.

7
0

Xiaomi the way: Hyped Chinese giant begins its battle for Britain

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Forgot to add.

Older Xiaomi phones were easy to root, so custom ROMS were everywhere; the new generations are locked down; you can only get root by contacting Xiaomi and requesting the phone be unlocked.

So far, so good; except the unlock request page seems to turn up in Chinese 99% of the time, and uses active scripting, so Google Translate doesnt help.

1
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Can't wait for their cheap folding bikes!

Trouble is with EU tariffs, those bikes cannot be sold at a competitive price due to the punitive taxes protecting a couple of French eBike makers.

I could walk out of any hotel in China and buy a cheap eBike for £120- £150 right now; but the taxes alone for that bike to enter the EU mean it would cost me ~£650 (shipping is almost nothing if you know the right people).

5
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge
Meh

Phone quality is nothing without the software/Firmware back to back it up

And sadly, Xiaomi has lost the plot on that front.

Updates riddled with flaws and bugs that arent getting fixed - sometime ever; a desktop suite that hasnt been updated since 2015, and hasnt worked since 2016.

Dont get me wrong, the phones are great, I have been buying Xiaomi for years; but the constant messing around with features - some of them core features, and the buggering up of said features has become a big issue; as is the lack of spares for some the newer phones.

(I can get spares for my 2014 phone, but not for my 2016/17 phones).

I blame the diversification into anything and everything, you can get Xiaomi branded umbrellas now FFS!!!

2
0

Open justice FTW! El Reg fought the law – and El Reg won

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: Streisand effect in 3..2...1...

Well Done guys; a few years back I had my own run in with Aria, what a bunch of shits they are.

You couldnt put the boot into a nastier bunch of wankers.

(Pardon my French)

7
0

UK's Royal Navy buys £13m mine-blasting robot boat

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Coat

So this is the best purchase the RN have had since buying all those early Ford Modeos - because the advert said they were fitted with "Anti-Submarine Seats".

(Gets coat).

0
0

SpaceX Bangabandhu-1 launch held up while Dragon splashes down on time

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Gimp

Bangabandhu-1

I thought is was the new Crash Bandicoot TV spin-off.

(Or an Indian porn channel)

2
0

Yes, people see straight through male displays of bling (they're only after a fling)

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: What a pile of old bollocks.

I was thinking Tripe, but Bollocks will do.

1
0

The Sun will blow up into a huge, glowing bubble of gas during its death

Ian Emery
Silver badge
Angel

Re: Disappointed

I was thinking that if you replaced "The Sun" with "The Donald", it would make a lot of people happy.

That's not a divine being; that is someone using Colgate Total Care Toothpaste!!!

1
1

Pentagon in uproar: 'China's lasers' make US pilots shake in Djibouti

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Advanced Tactical Laser - ATL

"Weebles wobble but they don't fall down"

Fake News.

They DO fall down if you push them hard enough.

(Nursery Nurse for 25 years)

7
0
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Binding Protocol?

Malcom REALLY need to read the OP in this sub-thread before posting again.

Ré that post; at least the gunship will be using bullets with a low lead content - to avoid unnecessarily harming people or the environment.

13
2
Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Laser canon and sonic death rays.

Err,

According to a news report I read a month or so ago, the Canadians have also been suffering from the same mystery illness the US blames on Sonic attacks, and have evacuated families from Cuba; the fleapit is classed as a solo deployment now; essential personal only.

Another report suggests it might be an interference pattern caused by various spybugs planted in the buildings interfering with each other, that creates a supersonic whistling noise.

Ré Hellfire.

A laser guided bomb, sans warhead, but tuned to the frequency being used might put the wind up them, but not kill everyone in the vicinity.

Just a thought.

12
6

Take-off crash 'n' burn didn't kill the Concorde, it was just too bloody expensive to maintain

Ian Emery
Silver badge

Re: Minor Point

BARELY long enough runway.

I watched it land (on borrowed engines), from a hillside a few miles away from the runway..

Technically the runway was too short, but somehow they managed it, by using a lot of run-off apron.

Bet the pilot had brown trousers.

Watched the BA ones taking off from Heathrow a few times; fuelling up at the petrol station, you had to stop and put your hands over your ears, even after the "hush kit" upgrades made the engines quieter (supposedly).

Watching it as it left the ground made every other aircraft look like it was flying slo-mo; greased weasel or what!!!

13
1

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018