* Posts by Ochib

80 posts • joined 22 Mar 2016

Page:

Azure certifications are awful, Microsoft admits, so it has made new ones

Ochib

The issue is that the HR Droids use the lack of Certs to remove CVs from the pile before passing the list on to IT

6
0

Ticketmaster breach 'part of massive bank card slurping campaign'

Ochib

Just waiting for the punters who have been hit by this to be past back on forth between the bank and Ticketmaster each saying that you need to get your money back from the other party as they are not to blame

5
1

I see a satellite of a man ... Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, that's now 4 sats fit to go

Ochib

Re: Receiving the signal

Navstar s the name of the American system, not GPS. GLONASS, Navstar and Galileo are all types of GPS.

4
3

Blood spilled from another US high school shooting has yet to dry – and video games are already being blamed

Ochib

Re: Early information

"assault rifles " are banned. However there is no such weapon

0
1
Ochib

"I thought all firearms (except licensed shotguns for farmers, hunters and gamekeepers) were banned in the UK? Didn't the Hungerford shooter use an AK47?"

Rifles are also permitted. Not military or semi auto though."

You can shoot an AR-15 in the UK, however it needs to be converted to bolt-action. The University of Texas tower shooting ( 16 people (including one unborn child) dead and 31 injured) was with a bolt action riffle.

2
0
Ochib

Re: Early information

"Regulate ammunition supplies.

For personal protection,. you don't need more than one reload. If it takes more than that you've lost."

If I go to the gun range to shoot, I will be shooting more than one reload, On average you would use 100-200 rounds for practice 1-2 times a week. Where would I store the rounds?

1
6

Tech support made the news after bomb squad and police showed up to 'defuse' leaky UPS

Ochib

Relevent XKCD

https://www.xkcd.com/651/

5
0

Blighty's super-duper F-35B fighter jets are due to arrive in a few weeks

Ochib

Re: why didnt they..

Because you would have needed a 22,000 lb,bomb rather than a 9,250 pound bomb as water has a much higher density than air, which makes water harder to move (higher inertia). It is also relatively hard to compress (increase density) when under pressure. These two together make water an excellent conductor of shock waves from an explosion.

13
0

Bloodhound Super-Sonic Car aims to wake up Newquay: Rocket work restart in August

Ochib

Aussie Invader sounds like something Anne Summers would sell.

6
0

Defra to MPs: There's no way Brexit IT can be as crap as rural payments

Ochib

Re: quite the contrary

" handful of (locally extracted) cold gravel for breakfast"

That's luxury, when I was young we were given rocks to crush down to gravel

0
0

German IKEA trip fracas assembles over trolley right of way

Ochib

http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-3008

3
0

Fixing a printer ended with a dozen fire engines in the car park

Ochib

Re: Re:Victorian railways had a few exploding boiler incidents

http://www.watlingtonnorfolk.co.uk/boiler-explosion-1867.html

"

On Tuesday morning, an agricultural engine, employed in thrashing wheat at Watlington, in a field adjoining the Magdalen road, and about 200 yards from the railway station, exploded with a terrific report, killing five men and boys on the spot, and so severely injuring seven more that two of them died a few hours afterwards and others were not expected to survive. The cause of the explosion is clearly ascertained to have been the monstrous, but, it is to be feared, very prevalent practice of tying down the safety valve, in order to get more work out of the engine than it was other wise capable of performing. The poor man who, no doubt was responsible for the act has paid with his life the penalty of his folly, and is therefore beyond the reach of blame; but it may be hoped the moral of his fate and that of his unfortunate companions will not be lost upon the members of that large class of men who have such engines, or steam engines of any kind under their charge."

3
0
Ochib

The good old lp0 on fire error

34
0

Australian foreplay: Bum-biting in an underground hole

Ochib

Re: The wombat is the only animal

http://www.ibtimes.com/wombat-poop-why-it-cubed-reason-australian-marsupials-square-droppings-1438518

1
0

Grab your lamp, you've pulled: Brits punt life-saving gravity-powered light

Ochib

Re: Dry sand flows better than water ...

I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere

3
0
Ochib

It's not the squirrels, it's the drop bears

10
0

Recycling tech biz bosses get years for VAT fraud, money laundering

Ochib

Re: banned from holding a directorship

The drink driving laws have been amended to allow the Judge to make the ban consecutive rather than concurrent.

5
0

Sysadmin unplugged wrong server, ran away, hoped nobody noticed

Ochib

Re: For magical threats..

You mean 7a or the one in between seven and nine. You know, two cubed. Four plus four. Twenty-four divided by three .The one you can't say out loud or else you'll get ate. What do you mean, the ichor god Bel-Shamharoth can't tell the difference between two homonyms like the past tense of the verb "to eat", and the number eight... OK, so they sound identical but have different meanings, that's what a homonym means. Fine, but is this really the time for a grammar lesson?

14
0

UK consumer help bloke Martin Lewis is suing Facebook over fake ads

Ochib

At least he will be giving any money left over from legal costs to "Scam Charities" (As per the London Evening Standard)

*Surely that should be Anti-Scam Charities (Ed)

5
0

Super Cali health inspectors: Tesla blood awoke us

Ochib

unionists, were they the fellows who keep saying "NO NO NO NO"

0
1

US, UK cyber cops warn Russians are rooting around in your routers

Ochib

Problem is that most home routers are supplied by the ISP and updated by the ISP.

When I was a Sky customer, i attempted to replace the rebadged netgear router with something a bit more secure. I asked for my ADSL usename/password and was told that they did give that information to the customers as their service would only work with their routers. A few days later there was a report about all the security issues with sky routers.

16
0

France wants you to put lights and beacons on your drone

Ochib

Is there any rule for the maximum power output for the drones, since broadcasting at over 20 watts may screw up IEEE 802.11n communications.

4
0

How do you get drones talking to air traffic controllers? Pretty easily, says Brit startup

Ochib

Re: Bugger!

I thought I had a rich uncle. But he has only got a glider

2
0

UK smut overlord declares age checks should protect users' privates

Ochib

"This includes offering clear information for end-users on data protection; that tools don't ask for more data that necessary to confirm someone's age "

Are your over 18 Y/N (Lying is a criminal offence)

There you go a perfect tool that will confirm the user ages, and give a clear warning that if the lie then they could be arrested

2
0

Slap visibility beacons on bikes so they can chat to auto autos, says trade body

Ochib

Fun and Ganes

Let's get loads of the beacons and stick them to random street furniture and even stick them to the cats eyes.

0
0

Facebook suspends account of Cambridge Analytica whistleblower

Ochib

'If you are not paying for it, you're not the customer; you're the product being sold

25
1

Dolby sues Adobe for dodging license fees

Ochib

Gordons ALIVE !

7
0

Screw everything! French swingers campsite up for sale, owners 'tired'

Ochib

Re: Nude Petanque

Just don't play Petanque with the BOFH

http://bofharchive.com/1998/bastard98-13.html

1
0

Did somebody say Brexit? Cambridge Analytica grilled: Brit MPs' Fake News probe

Ochib

Re: This the same guy who moonlights as the one rogue software engineer at other organisations?

Chuck Finley is the alias of Sam Axe

2
0

Game of Thrones showrunners to make Star Wars flicks

Ochib

Never tell me the odds

3
1

TalkTalk to splash £1.5bn laying full fibre on 3 million doorsteps

Ochib

Good news you will be able to get upto 1gb

Bad news It will be throttled and subject to a fair use policy

Worse news you will need to use TalkTalk

29
1

Ignore that FBI. We're the real FBI, says the FBI that's totally the FBI

Ochib

How long before your get the scammers sending an email warning that the warning email sent by the FBI, warning about the scammers, is a scam

5
0

UK.gov pushes ahead with legal right to 10Mbps

Ochib

The conversation may go like this

“Can I legally demand faster internet”

“Yes, you can legally demand it"

"OK then I demand of you, faster internet. Now"

"Noted."

"So when am I getting my faster internet?"

"You're not."

"I'm not?"

"No sir."

"But you said I can legally demand it?"

“And you can"

"So I did?"

"Right you are sir"

"So where is it?"

"Well you see sir, we don't have to legally provide it."

"Well that's not a lot of use is it?"

"Absolutely not sir. Good day."

2
0

Oh, the weather outside is frightful, but the data centre temp's delightful

Ochib

It would have been higher than 11"

17
1

Archive of 1.4 billion credentials in clear text found in dark web archive

Ochib

Ubiquitous XKCD

https://www.xkcd.com/936/

4
1

Royal Bank of Scotland culls 1 in 4 branches, blames the interwebz

Ochib

Decimate is one in ten, not one in four as the word decimation is derived from Latin meaning "removal of a tenth"

36
1

Chainmail tires re-invent the wheel to get future NASA rovers rolling

Ochib

Need get an account with The Astro-Afro-Antarctico-Amer-Asian Auto Association, or Septuple-A

7
0

Car tax evasion has soared since paper discs scrapped

Ochib

Proper Tea is theft, that why Labour party staff drink P-Tips

2
0
Ochib

"Erm... They don't pay road tax anyway!"

No one pays Road Tax, it's call VED

6
10

How about that time Russian military used a video game pic as proof of US aiding ISIS?

Ochib

Re: Yeah, what about them?

Rule 29. The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy. No more. No less.

11
0

80-year-old cyclist killed in prang with Tesla Model S

Ochib

Re: RE: JetSetGim

Nope,

Cyclist made a sudden movement, either foot slipped of the peddle or moved to avoid a pothole, got run over by a bus that was behind the cyclist and the courts ruled that it was an unfortunate accident.

1
3
Ochib

Re: RE: unwanted infantilism

As recorded by the ONS on the number of pedestrian deaths caused by bicycles are between 2-3 a year, however the number of pedestrian deaths caused by cars are around 400 a year

51
3

Teensy weensy space shuttle flies and lands

Ochib

Re: The lifting body spaceplane lives on

Austin 3:16 says "I just rebuilt your body"

2
0

Lord of the Rings TV show shopped around Hollywood

Ochib

Re: Scouring of the Shire

As someone who lives near to Sarehole Mill, and just down the road from Tolkien's family house, live no were near the "Black Country" I live in Birmingham and am not a Yam-Yam

3
0
Ochib

Re: "when Sauron was mortal "

Collectively, the “Lord of the Rings” and “Hobbit” films have grossed close to $6 billion at the worldwide box office, however the deal with the Tolkien estate was for points on the net and the famous "Hollywood accounting" meant that the film has not made a profit. The Estate had to sue the production company for damages.

8
0

Boss visited the night shift and found a car in the data centre

Ochib
Paris Hilton

The post is required, and must contain letters.

Having had to look a the CCTV footage (more than one). It appears that a spinning IBM 3380 disk unit has the same effect on a woman's anatomy as washing machine on a spin cycle.

29
0

After seven-hour operation, the ISS has a new 'hand'

Ochib

Re: previous experience

And your name is Randy, so why did the old one wear out?

5
0

FedEx: TNT NotPetya infection blew a $300m hole in our numbers

Ochib

Re: $300M!!

Sounds like a job for Barney Stinson as his last job title was P.L.E.A.S.E. (Provide Legal Exculpation and Sign Everything)

1
0

Inept bloke who tried to sell military sat secrets to Russia gets 5 years

Ochib

Re Pled

Pled

[plɛd]

DEFINITION

North American, Scottish, or dialect past participle of plead.

7
0

Page:

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018