* Posts by Ochib

139 posts • joined 22 Mar 2016


Well Holby damned! We've caught a virus: Brit medical soap operas team up for 'cyber' episode


Re: Red shirt guy goes first

I know what you mean. It's such a shame they never got repeated.

Happy Satellite Collision Day! It is 10 years since Russia and Iridium got too close for comfort


Re: At least China is trying to do something about it*

"So, a sort of "Make Coal Dirty Again" campaign promise? Funny, I can't remember Trump promising that, but If you think that's what he did then I guess I must have missed it somehow."

He may not of promised that, but let us look at what he has done

1) Trump rolls back climate change rule that restricted new coal plants (https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2018/dec/06/trump-rolls-back-climate-change-rule-that-restricted-new-coal-plants)

2) Trump administration to cut air pollution from heavy-duty trucks (https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2018/nov/13/epa-new-heavy-duty-truck-pollution-rule-nitrogen-oxide)

3) Trump administration rolls back methane pollution rule despite harmful health impacts (https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2018/sep/18/epa-methane-pollution-rule-rolled-back-health-warning)

Original WWII German message decrypts to go on display at National Museum of Computing


Re: Obligatory

Calling Night Hawk...'allo, allo Come in Night Hawk... Listen very carefully I shall say this only once.....

OK, it's early 2019. Has Leeds Hospital finally managed to 'axe the fax'? Um, yes and no


Re: What about scan to email?

why do they need a paper record for their files!" ?????????

Well most of them don't have IT systems and still use paper system.

Paper systems work, you don't need to train the staff to read a piece of paper and you can keep the paper file in the patients room.

Straight outta Blighty: Readers, if you were a tech billionaire, what would you do?


Re: Where is the poll option for

And if your biscuits are to big for your cup, there is a solution



Re: Opertunity

Will you also change the nation anthem to:

When dragons belch and hippos flee

My thoughts, England, are of thee

Let others boast of martial dash

For we have boldly fought with cash

We own all your helmets, we own all your shoes

We own all your generals - touch us and you'll lose.

England! England!

England owns the day!

We can rule you wholesale

Touch us and you'll pay.

We bankrupt all invaders, we sell them souvenirs

We ner ner ner ner ner, hner ner hner by the ears

Er hner we ner ner ner ner ner

Ner ner her ner ner ner hner the ner

Er ner ner hner ner, nher hner ner ner (etc.)

Ner hner ner, your gleaming swords

We mortgaged to the hilt

England! England!

Hner ner ner ner ner ner

We can rule you wholesale

Credit where it's due."

Users fail to squeak through basic computer skills test. Well, it was the '90s


Re: Shameless repost of an allegedly genuine IBM memo from the 80's...

Snopes says "Maybe"


Fake broadband ISP support scammers accidentally cough up IP address to Deadpool in card phish gone wrong


Re: Deadpool

Chaotic neutral is someone who pledges to neither the good or evil spectrum, but enjoys ******* things up. Deadpool is a mercenary who enjoys his job. He is 'chaotic' because his means and motives are simply to have fun. This is usually attributed to psychopathic characters, which Deadpool is.

Build the wall... around your DNS settings, US govt IT staff urged by Homeland Security amid domain hijackings


Re: This is a joke right?

"Start counting when business gets back to what passes as normal"

"Five to one against and falling..." she said, "four to one against and falling...three to one...two...one...probability factor of one to one...we have normality, I repeat we have normality." She turned her microphone off—then turned it back on, with a slight smile and continued: "Anything you still can’t cope with is therefore your own problem."


Re: This is a joke right?



Under the Antideficiency Act, It is illegal for staff employed by the US government to check their email during a shutdown. So it is unlikely that the IT staff will officially know about this until they go back to work

Friday fun fact: If Stegosauruses had space telescopes, they wouldn't have seen any rings around Saturn


Re: Distant Origin

It was called Distant Origin

On the planet where Voyager's crew had previously been marooned, Professor Gegen and his assistant Veer, two paleontologists of a space-faring saurian species known as the Voth, discover the skeletal remains of a human, most likely Lt. Hogan. They are fascinated by the similarity of its genome to their own species, and Gegen suggests that this supports the highly controversial Distant Origin theory, that the Voth had originated on a far-distant planet instead of the current area of space from which they rule their empire. Proof of the theory has been sought by other Voth scientists, but the heretical theory has often led to their exile.

To confirm their proof, Gegen and Veer track down the origin of the skeleton, learning of Voyager's presence in the Delta Quadrant. They locate the ship and transport aboard while cloaked, observing the mostly human crew in the setting. Voyager's sensors detect their presence, and the crew reveals the two Voth. Veer responds instinctively by releasing sedative-tipped needles that strike Chakotay; Gegen grabs the human and transports him aboard his ship, fleeing from Voyager. The Doctor examines Veer and identifies the similar genetic structure; he and Captain Janeway use simulations to determine that the Voths descended from a species of dinosaur known as the hadrosaurs, probably of genus Parasaurolophus.

Gegen wakes Chakotay, and explains the situation, requesting Chakotay accompany him when he presents his evidence to the Voth elders; meanwhile, Voyager is captured by the Voth. Gegen is put on trial for heresy, and it soon becomes clear that he has been pre-judged guilty and the "trial" is only an opportunity for him to recant and reduce his punishment. Veer, recovered from Voyager, is coerced to act as a witness against Gegen by Minister Odala. Chakotay attempts to argue for Gegen, noting that the Voth theory of origins has changed so much to fit what the Voth wish to believe and not reality. Odala rejects this, sentencing Gegen to a prison colony unless he recants. When he still refuses, she then orders Voyager destroyed and its entire crew, the evidence for his theory, also sent to the prison colony. Gegen, unwilling to see them destroyed, realizes he has no choice but to recant.

Odala assigns Gegen a new job, and orders Voyager to leave Voth space forever. Before departing, Chakotay gives Gegen a globe of the Earth, which Gegen acknowledges that someday, the Voth will accept as their home world

Microsoft sends a raft of Windows 10 patches out into the Windows Update ocean


Re: MDBs? Really?

Move them to a Excel spreadsheet What could go wrong

Drone goal! Quadcopter menace alert freezes flights from London Heathrow Airport


Re: Time to get real

Where are the drones with mounted lasers?

A few reasons why cops haven't immediately shot down London Gatwick airport drone menace


Re: A crossbow and some 50lb line would do it

Probably a home built drone as the Geofencing doesn’t seem to be working and thus unlikely to have serial numbers.

On the first day of Christmas, Microsoft gave to me... an emergency out-of-band security patch for IE


The First day of Christmas

Is December 25, we are still in Advent

LG's beer-making bot singlehandedly sucks all fun, boffinry from home brewing


Re: Breakfast ale

"Just because you can do something, that doesn't mean that you should." Why not, it has worked so well for Brexit

Bloodhound SSC reaches the end of the road for want of £25m


Re: A national disgrace? No other nation wants to do it. Nobody cares.

"aussieinvader" Sounds like something from the Oz version of Anne Summers

College PRIMOS prankster wreaks havoc with sysadmin manuals


Boot Floppys

When I was at College there were a number of Amstrad 1640s in the computer lab for general use. They stated that the HDD were locked down so you couldn't copy any information to the HDD.

However a quick boot from a FDD proved that the software was run in the config.sys file.

A quick FDSIK later and there is no C: drive

Pencil manufacturers rejoice: Oz government doesn't like e-voting


Very hard to hack a pencil

The post is required, and must contain letters.

After all that! Ofcom proposes BT as only broadband universal services provider for whole of UK (except Hull)


The phone call to BT will go like this

Customer: Can I have 10Mbps internet

Bt: No

Customer: I have a legal right to demand a minimum broadband download speed of 10Mbps

Bt: Yes you have a legal right to demand a minimum broadband download speed of 10Mbps

Customer: Can I have 10Mbps internet

BT: No

Customer: But you said that I have a legal right to demand a minimum broadband download speed of 10Mbps

Bt: That's correct, you have legal a right to demand a minimum broadband download speed of 10Mbps, but we don't have an legal obligation to supply a minimum broadband download speed of 10Mbps

Microsoft: New icons, new drivers, AI! Everything is awesome!


I see that you are writing a TODO list

It's the return of Clippy :) :) :)

Mystery sign-poster pities the fool who would litter the UK's West Midlands


Even Dr Who used this in the episodes "The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances"

Are you my mummy?

Great Scott! Is nothing sacred? US movie-goers vote Back To The Future as most-wanted reboot


About time for a Matrix Sequel

There is only Matrix film at the moment

Well that's just spliffing: UK Amazon merchants peddling Mary Jane


Colonel Sandurz: Sir?

Dark Helmet: [about to use the bullhorn to the workers but uses it on Sandurz instead] What?

Colonel Sandurz: Are we being too literal?

Dark Helmet: [through the bullhorn] No, you fool, we're following orders. We were told to comb the desert, so we're combing it. [puts down bullhorn] Found anything yet?!

Soldier: Nothing yet, sir!

Dark Helmet: How about you?!

Soldier: Not a thing, sir!

[camera pans to two soldiers using an Afro Pick.]

Dark Helmet: What about you guys?!

Black soldier: We ain't found shit!

Sorry, but NASA says Mars signal wasn't Opportunity knocking


Non Relevent XKCD


Douglas Adams was right, ish... Super-Earth world clocked orbiting 'nearby' Barnard's Star


Re: As for ion drive, where do you propose to get the energy from?

"Periapsis burns are standard practice for capture. Cassini and Galileo both depended on planetary gravity to help their captures."

Shhhhh don't tell NASA, the last time they tried this on MARS they got their Freedom Units mixed up and hit the planet hard

BT: We're stocking warehouses with kit ahead of Brexit to avoid shortages


Re: A timely reminder...

"You do realise Scotland is part of the UK? For now at least."

But Ireland isn't

Budget 2018: UK goes it alone on digital sales tax for tech giants


Re: A tiny step in the right direction

A contract must be awarded on the basis of either:

Lowest price: The lowest priced tender wins. No other element of the tender may be taken into account; or

The most economically advantageous tender (MEAT): Factors other than or in addition to price, like quality, technical merit and running costs can be taken into account.

If MEAT is used:

the contract award criteria (e.g. "price, quality of services, risk to contracting authority etc.") and any sub-criteria must be set out either in the OJEU notice or the tender documents; and

the weighting of each criterion (and sub-criterion, if weighted) must also normally be given, either as an exact number or as a meaningful range (e.g. 'price: 30%-40%'.).

Public procurement law: the basics (https://www.out-law.com/page-5964)

It's big, it's blue, and it'll be raining down on you – it's 3200 Phaethon


The closest passage will be in December 14, 2093, when it will pass 0.01981 AU (2,964,000 km; 1,841,000 mi) from Earth. On December 16, 2017, at 23:00 UT, Phaethon passed 0.06893173 AU (10,312,040 km; 6,407,605 mi) from Earth,

Morrisons supermarket: We're taking payroll leak liability fight to UK Supreme Court


"MGM suing the victims of the mass shooting in Las Vegas."

MGM is not suing for money, but the company wants a federal court to rule that it cannot be held liable for the shooting by more than 1,000 victims and others it named in the suits. The company said it named only people that have already sued or given notice that they intend to do so.

It is based on a federal law passed after the Sept. 11 terror attacks, which is known as the Support Antiterrorism by Fostering Effective Technologies, or Safety, Act.

The law is intended to shield federally certified manufacturers of security equipment and providers of security services from liability should they fail to prevent a terrorist attack, which the law defines as an unlawful act that causes mass destruction to citizens or institutions of the United States.

MGM contends that under the law, which Congress passed in 2002, it is immunized from liability because it met two conditions: A security company that was hired for the concert had a certification from the Department of Homeland Security, and the shooting qualified, in the company’s view, as an “act of terrorism.”

SQLite creator crucified after code of conduct warns devs to love God, and not kill, commit adultery, steal, curse...


Re: Beer!

Not Beer or Brandy but Wreck the Hoose Juice/Commotion Lotion/Buckie is the best thing to come from the Benedictine monks.

UK space comes to an 'understanding' with Australia as Brexit looms



What has the Averting Sandards Agency got to with this?

Amazon Alexa outage: Voice-activated devices are down in UK and beyond


Re: Just Echo Dots?

"three Echo Dots" … do they work in the same way as the three seashells?

Ooof! Cisco Webex has been down for 7 hours – and counting


This is great

Now we can take a leaf out of the BOFH's handbook and blame some-else for the issue

Brexit campaigner AggregateIQ challenges UK's first GDPR notice


Re: retroactive lawmaking at it's finest.

There is, however the company were given notice that the law was changing and that to compile with the new law they would need to change how they processed data. They didn't change and thus were charged with breaching the new law

It's is bit like the speed limits on a road changing from 30 mph to 20 mph, you would have seen the new signs going up and if you still drive at 30 mph you will be taken to court.

Oh Smeg! Hacked white goods maker resurfaces after system shutdown


the only trouble, is that you need to eat it before the bread dissolves


What, Captain Hollister and what about Todhunter and Selby?

Revealed: The billionaire baron who’ll ride Elon’s thrusting erection to the Moon and back


Re: A better passenger...

However "Mad" Mike Hughes would claim that it was the drugs that made him see that the earth was round. And the SpaceX put these drugs in the air supply

Leeds hospital launches campaign to 'axe the fax'


The Electronic Signatures Directive (99/93/EC)

An electronic signature must be:

•uniquely linked to the signatory;

•capable of identifying the signatory;

•created using means that the signatory can maintain under his sole control;

•linked to the data in such a manner that any subsequent change of the data is detectable.

The most common methods of achieving this are to use cryptography (symmetric or asymmetric) technology .

So you will need a encryption system that all the parties agree to and can use. Or you use a fax


So have the NHS found another way of sending signed documents, with a method of proving that they have been send and received, to any number of third parties

You'll never guess what you can do once you steal a laptop, reflash the BIOS, and reboot it


Re: Again,

"I, personally, always shut down the PC when not in use. Yes it is a bit of a pain having to wait for the PC to boot"

Every morning it runs like this;

1) Power Laptop up

2) Get coffee

3) Drink coffee

4) After stage 2 and 3 the laptop is ready for me to logon

UK.gov finally adds Galileo and Copernicus to the Brexit divorce bill


Who would have thought that Brexit was so complicated

World's oldest URL – fragments 73,000 years old – discovered in cave


It clearly says "Send Nudes"

'World's favorite airline' favorite among hackers: British Airways site, app hacked for two weeks


Re: Missing from the press release -- CVV status

According to the Radio 4 interview, the following information was stolen

1) Credit Card number

2) Expiration date

3) CVV number

4) Name

5) DOB

And he wanted to tell how the information was stolen, but it was very complicated (subtext it was in a report he read, but it wasn’t written in a language he understood)

Defense Distributed starts selling gun CAD files amid court drama


$2 space into an AK

Who needs fancy CNC or a 3D printer when you can turn a spade in to an AK


Muslim American woman sues US border cops: Gimme back my seized iPhone's data!



If I have client information on my phone, and it gets seized at the airport and copied. Whould that mean that I have breach the GDPR and then liable for a fine?

Tax the tech giants and ISPs until the bits squeak – Corbyn


Re: Boo Hoo

During her time as Prime Minister, Margaret Thatcher openly called a terrorist a "true friend", invited a terrorist into her home for tea, and personally lobbied against a terrorist's prosecution for war crimes.

Thatcher's support for Chile's former torturer-in-chief General Pinochet is no secret; it was something she was proud of. Despite her assertion that “The United States and Britain have together been the greatest alliance in defence of liberty and justice,” Thatcher refused to back down in her support of a man who overthrew a democratically elected government. This was a man who initiated the notorious Caravan of Death, the army unit that travelled the country by helicopter, murdering and torturing the General's opponents.

Somerset boozer prepares to declare its inn-dependence from UK


"I trust the national anthem will be "Ale to the Chief"."

And the only rule will be "Pint for the fella... Glass of white wine/ fruit-based drink for the lady!"

'Cos if there were no rules where would we be? France! And if we had too many rules where would we be? Germany!

London's Gatwick Airport flies back to the future as screens fail


So why was there no redundancy in the internet link?


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