* Posts by simonlb

105 posts • joined 13 Nov 2015

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We asked for your Fitbit horror stories and, oh wow, did you deliver: Readers sync their teeth into 'junk' gizmos

simonlb

Re: Lots of dodgy crap out there

Shitbit!

Vulns out of the box: 12 in 13 small biz network devices terribly insecure by default – research

simonlb
Unhappy

No response from Drobo?

Doesn't surprise me as they are owned by a 'private equity' group, which normally follows the standard script of reducing the level of investment and support whilst quietly asset stripping the company until it's in terminal decline. Give it a couple of years.

Wi-Fi woes and broken browser target both young and old in Microsoft patch land

simonlb

Re: The price is right.

It's now called "Windows as a steaming pile of shit"

UK Home Office primes Brexit spam cannon for a million texts reminding folk to check passports

simonlb

Re: Everything under control

You mean they've lied to us again?

I have no mouth and I must scream: You can add audio to wobbles in latest Windows 10 patch

simonlb

Windows 10 will never work properly

FTFY

Snoops can bypass iOS 13 lock screen to eyeball your address book. Apple hasn't fix it yet. Valid flaw? You decide

simonlb

Are the lawyers costs bundled in with the phone on the 24-month contract?

simonlb
Meh

"allow access when locked"

Whether it's a good or bad UI design decision isn't really the issue here. My concern is if it's enabled by default, as most users probably wouldn't know it's there and would prefer to decide for themselves whether to turn it on or not.

There and back again: NASA's mobile launcher returns to testing after ducking out for Dorian

simonlb

Re: The bigger they are

Stand Chuck Norris on the roof!

Breaking, literally: Microsoft's fix for CPU-hogging Windows bug wrecks desktop search

simonlb
Joke

Microsoft did not immediately respond to a request for comment

Because all their PCs have hung with the fans running at full speed

Not so easy to make a quick getaway when it takes 3 hours to juice up your motor, eh Brits?

simonlb

This is why your utility bills have risen so much over the past fifteen years or so - we've all been paying for the building of all the wind farms which have sprung up all over the place during that period. That and the subsidies paid out to the owners of each turbine to compensate them when there isn't any wind. Great eh?

simonlb

The only realistic option is nuclear, just not using PWR's but using thorium cycle reactors instead as they are inherently safer (as in cannot have a meltdown) and do not need to have their fuel specially made, using existing nuclear waste with minimal processing. Current estimates indicate that the existing global stockpile of nuclear waste could power thorium cycle reactors for well over 20,000 years.

As for your solar stuff, after 20-years your solar cells will be well knackered and producing absolutely sod all power so good luck getting those to outlast a nuclear reactor.

I agree with your point on quick-change batteries though, as it is realistically the only logical option for electric vehicles if we want to get away from using fossil fuels. At the moment anyway.

HP Inc waves bye to EMEA president with 'immediate effect'

simonlb
FAIL

Sadly, it's far too late for HP now and anyone who could have made a difference left well over 15 years ago.

The last 'innovative' product they brought out was the Touchpad but they completely fucked that up by trying to compete directly against the iPad which was already established and very much sought after. If they'd pitched it at a third of the price as a loss leader it would have sold well and IMHO been a success. But scrapping it after less than six weeks on sale, instead of rethinking their strategy and significantly lowering the price to see if sales picked up and market share and the ecosystem for it established itself, that was just insane.

simonlb

Printers are commodity now, so people are more likely to go for a cheaper option when they need to refill an empty ink cartridge - less than £15 for three or more full sets of compatible cartridges from Amazon, or £60-odd for one full set of genuine inks. And if printer costs less than £50 to replace where's the incentive to buy genuine ink?

OK, let's try that again: Vulture rakes a talon on Samsung's fresh attempt at the Galaxy Fold 5G

simonlb
Thumb Down

Why?

An obscenely expensive and overly complex solution to a problem that doesn't even exist.

10 months of Jeremy Kyle later*, ex-BT boss Gavin Patterson shacks up with Salesforce

simonlb

But being brutally honest, in the UK at least, daytime TV is so mind numbingly crap it's the best reason to go out and get a job!

Full of beans? Sadly not as fellow cracks open tin at dinner to find just one

simonlb

Re: Rations

No rations, just a weekly food allowance of various Victory branded produce available from your local Victory food bank.

Newb admits he ran Satori botnet that turned thousands of hacked devices into a 100Gbps+ DDoS-for-hire cannon

simonlb
FAIL

Re: The future's bright...

Yeah, remind when our lives became so problematic that we had to connect all our home lighting to the Internet to resolve an issue that never existed.

Allowlist, not whitelist. Blocklist, not blacklist. Goodbye, wtf. Microsoft scans Chromium code, lops off offensive words

simonlb

Re: Programming and computers as a casualty

I'm also pretty sure someone would complain if you replaced SOFT with FLACCID.

simonlb

Re: Programming and computers as a casualty

Oooh automotive... I get all light-headed when I think about rubbing a well oiled gudgeon or fondling someones trunnion.

simonlb
Joke

Re: This is stupid

Just wait until they find the two functions named cuntybollocks and twatknackerbollockface!

Microsoft's cloudy Windows Virtual Desktop: It fills a gap, but there are plenty of annoyances

simonlb

Re: Incomplete Software

Because Microsoft is a marketing company which also occasionally dabbles in software, which is currently not a priority.

Teletext Holidays a) exists and b) left 200k customer call recordings exposed in S3 bucket

simonlb
Happy

Re: many companies still leave their S3 buckets unsecured

Yeah but were the text files actually called that when you originally put them there?

For Foxit's sake: PDF editor biz breached, users' passwords among stolen data

simonlb
Facepalm

Re: Deliberate?

'web designer setting an input field length'

How about:

Company rolls out a new internal system.

First time login is with temporary password and you set a new password of between 8 and 20 characters

Subsequently, only some users can then login but most cannot and receive an incorrect password message when trying to login.

After large number of users log fault tickets, it emerges that even though the password field on the login screen can accommodate up to 20 characters, any entered password is being truncated to the first 8 characters entered before being checked against the users account, so only users who set an 8 character password could ever login.

Issue was quickly fixed, but someone got their arse kicked over it.

Can't bear to part with that well-worn copy of Windows 7? Microsoft might let you keep it updated an extra year

simonlb

I think Win10 is the replacement. If you want something functional and user-friendly, you might be waiting a while.

simonlb

Re: Deja Vu

'didn't we go through all this with XP ffs ?'

No, you went to Vista first so I understand your confusion. Once WIn7 came along a year-or-so later things got a bit better.

simonlb

Re: The cost of Win10 is far too high.

Also get rid of the abortion of a UI nailed to the front of it: Give me a Start button that displays a menu with everything - and I do mean everything - neatly displayed in a logical and coherent list. You know, like in Windows 7. I don't want to have to do a fucking search to find basic shit which should just be there!

Uncle Sam is asking Americans if they could refrain from slapping guns on their drones

simonlb

Re: If only the American forefathers knew about drones...

Have you not been keeping up? Washington flew a fighter/bomber and Jefferson piloted a helicopter gunship during the civil war - they both got distinguished flying medals for the number of successful sorties completed.

Now, if only someone would stop that horrible drone emanating from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington DC...

End of an era for ULA as the last Delta IV Medium rocket leaves launch pad

simonlb
Trollface

'The eye-watering potential £5bn price tag'

Well going off what Boris Johnson promised during the referendum, that's less than 15 weeks worth of the weekly £350M NHS money we would have had. Just sayin'.

Electric vehicles won't help UK meet emissions targets: Time to get out and walk, warn MPs

simonlb
Joke

Re: Alternatively,

Fret ye not, Sire, for this will be our glorious land but five years after thy hard Brexit date.

simonlb
Mushroom

Hydrogen? Seriously?

While it may sound good as an alternative bear in mind that in a petrol fire you at least have some change of escaping from the car. However, in a hydrogen explosion you are well and truly toast. See icon.

Don't trust Facebook's Libra cryptocurrency, boffins warn: Zuck & Co know that hash is king

simonlb

Re: "could lead to biased decision-making"

I'm not sure about other Facebook users on here, but most of the adverts Facebook ram into my timeline are almost always completely irrelevant to me. It's biased, but not in any sane or logical way.

Microsoft Notepad: If it ain't broke, shove it in the Store, then break it?

simonlb

Re: You just couldn't help it!

Didn't they already do that when they brought out Wordpad?

World recoils in horror as smartphone maker accused of helping government snoops read encrypted texts, track device whereabouts

simonlb
Happy

Re: Nope I'm lost

I think it's supposed to be Huawei, but as the article was in the WSJ it smells more like fake news to me.

WeWork filed its IPO homework. So we had a look at its small print and... yowser. What has El Reg got itself into?

simonlb
Coffee/keyboard

My bullshit filter just blew up after feeding that line into it. Thanks.

Stuffing your MacBook Pro in a ziplock bag before a flight ain't gonna cut it, say Feds

simonlb
FAIL

And it will only takes two weeks to replace as well. Amazing!

I'm off to browse Amazon now for that £20 replacement battery for my Asus laptop. The one I can change in 15 seconds.

Microsoft's Cortana booted off yet another service while Google and AWS get a bit catty over licensing shakeup

simonlb
Paris Hilton

Re: The burning question has to be...

I thought it was, " Cortana, what are you for?"

Paris, because she doesn't do much work either.

Donald Trump blinks in his one-man trade war with China: US govt stalls import tariff hike on Chinese phones, laptops, electronics

simonlb

'preventing further unfair transfers of American technology and intellectual property to China'

Unless I'm missing something, if you've already asked China to make your stuff for you, the transfer of the technology and IP has already been done, otherwise they couldn't make it. So how is this unfair?

simonlb
Meh

Re: Toys R Us

Firearms. It is America after all.

I could throttle you right about now: US Navy to ditch touchscreens after kit blamed for collision

simonlb
Happy

Re: Touch screens

Is that crashed as in Autopilot drove into something, or crashed as in the OS is in an infinite loop and can't recover?

simonlb
FAIL

Re: Touch screens

It's another example of this designer-led obsession with ramming every possible control into a touchscreen-based UI, without any sane or coherent thought given as to why.

Just because you can do something doesn't mean that you should.

Green search engine Ecosia thinks Google's Android auction stinks, gives bid a hard pass

simonlb
Trollface

Only 62 million trees?

If they'd' used anything other than Bing it would be in the trillions!

It's heads you win, tails you lose as Microsoft introduces CoinFlip™ for Windows 10

simonlb
Unhappy

Re: Have i got invisible rose-tinted specs on?

All MS realistically need to do is:

1. Remove the abysmal abortion of a UI and reinstate the one from Windows 7.

2. Get rid of all of the telemetry: if the telemetry was genuinely looked at and used, their updates would be seamless and work correctly for the vast majority or users every time. As this is patently not the case, then there must be an ulterior motive for the telemetry which no-one should trust at all.

3. If you must do an update cycle, make it an annual one, not every six months as people don't want to go through the pain and hassle of 'testing' a full OS update twice a year.

Please feel free to add further suggestions as you see fit.

Ohm my God: If you let anyone other than Apple replace your recent iPhone's battery, expect to be nagged by iOS

simonlb

It's the whole principle of it - having to go to an Apple authorised repair centre to remove a nag message after you've replaced a faulty battery with a genuine Apple replacement one.

Louis Rossman's YouTube channel has a number of videos which cover this whole topic in quite some depth.

simonlb
Flame

I've already commented on this before using the car analogy: there would be complete uproar if the car manufacturers mandated that the only thing that you as a car owner had control over was when you refuelled your car, but everything else - and I do mean absolutely everything which covers servicing and all routine maintenance - had to be done via one of their dealerships, otherwise the dashboard would be festooned with warning light and sounds, and the engine would refuse to start until the car was verified as safe to use by one of their dealers.

While Apple probably think this is perfectly acceptable, the two words which spring to mind for me for this restriction are 'onerous' and 'punitive'. If I buy something, I have the right to expect to be able to have it serviced or repaired by whoever the hell I choose, even if using genuine, original spare parts, and irrespective of whether it is still under warranty without being penalised/victimised (delete as appropriate) because I have exercised my rights as a consumer to choose what works best for me. However, I'll caveat this with certain car related things such as replacement key fobs or ECU's are probably justified in having to be 'registered' to the relevant car in question.

The minute a manufacturer starts to tell me I can only do something with one of their products - which I physically bought and paid for with my own money - when they see fit, otherwise it's functionality will be restricted or disabled until I ask then every so nicely to check it for me (and also paying them for the privilege), then I will not buy from them and they can fuck right off!

Top 5 greatest anime crossovers: Samsung deploys Microsoft at Note 10 hootenanny

simonlb
Meh

Re: Just like Apple

I agree they are falling behind, and if they're not careful are in danger of going the same way as HTC.

WTF is Boeing on? Not just customer databases lying around on the web. 787 jetliner code, too, security bugs and all

simonlb
FAIL

"irresponsible and misleading"

Like telling the FAA the 737MAX was exactly the same as all the previous ones and didn't need re-certifying, despite parts of it's flight envelope being significantly different and warranting a completely new augmentation system to assist the pilots with it? You know, the one which doesn't work and which the flight crews weren't necessarily told was there?

Over 300 people are dead because of that.

Brit couch potatoes increasingly switching off telly boxes in favour of YouTube and Netflix

simonlb
Trollface

Re: Brilliant?

I don't think Amazon struggled that much to make Top Gear look woefully pathetic and outdated next to the Grand Tour.

It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's two-dozen government surveillance balloons over America

simonlb
Facepalm

Re: Economics, mate.

Where do you think hospitals and healthcare companies get their medical-grade drugs from? Amazon? eBay!?

Pharmaceutical companies produce these at industrial scale for the existing medical global market.

Y2K, Windows NT4 Server and Notes. It's a 1990s Who, Me? special

simonlb

Re: Even to this day...

And it's even worse when you're connected remotely to an appliance and meant to type in the reboot command rather than shutdown...

New British Army psyops unit fires rebrandogun, smoke clears to reveal... I'm sorry, Dave...

simonlb
Happy

Re: It also looks like....

It looks more like it's got a very low rating on TripAdvisor.

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