* Posts by allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

5422 posts • joined 20 Oct 2015

Kaspersky Lab US staff grilled by Feds in nighttime swoop

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"Who, in a right state of mind, would buy McAfee, given their founders apparent mental state?"

1. "The company was founded in 1987 as McAfee Associates, named for its founder John McAfee, who resigned from the company in 1994." Source: Bernabeo, Paul (2008). Inventors and Inventions, Volume 4. Marshall Cavendish. p. 1033. ISBN 0761477675.

2. "Paranoid bastard" is actually not a bad mindset for working in computer security.

I haven't used McAfee software in maybe 15 years because IMO it's a POS.

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The 'DUP' joins El Reg’s illustrious online standards converter

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Sofa?

"So, it will cost one DUP for 5 years of coalition [...] "

Assuming the coalition will last the full five years. Which remains to be seen.

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Blighty's first aircraft carrier in six years is set to take to the seas

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Russian?? Surely you mean Chinese

They might share the data in exchange for something interesting, but they will want it for their collection, just in case.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Well, its good to see the QE going out to sea.

"So, why China is building and deploying its own carriers?"

1. There are lots of countries in the region who don't have the assets to take on a carrier group.

2. To keep the admirals happy. No, really. The PLA is a key factor in both military and economic matters, and therefore a key factor in politics.

3. Because they can. Yes, it's a bit of a pissing contest. But it's also a statement of political will and economical power.

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AES-256 keys sniffed in seconds using €200 of kit a few inches away

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Meanwhile...

False flag, probably - my sources tell me that the guys you're thinking of are mostly using a P.O. box in Weehawken, NJ for that sort of thing.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: I'm not even surprised.

"Seriously? That sounds like the something out of Mission Impossible."

Yes, I was wondering about that, too.

However, I must confess that I really like the term "protective detonation".

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US engineer in the clink for wrecking ex-bosses' smart meter radio masts with Pink Floyd lyrics

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Question: in theory, would it be possible to design a programming language that uses song lyrics as code? (After all, there is something like Ook! already.)

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Ex-NASA bod on Gwyneth Paltrow site's 'healing' stickers: 'Wow. What a load of BS'

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: You missed out the French...

... and the Austrians.

Some very promising developments in Tyrol over the last couple of years, I'll be investigating further on-site in October.

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PC rebooted every time user flushed the toilet

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: cleaning staff at computer centres

... always remind me of Hot Millions (trailer), writeup on Jimbopedia.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Solution (was: You want toast!)

If you

1. really need to remove that screw

2. will be able to replace it with another (less exotic)

3. can spare a bit or have other suitable pieces of metal

4. have a bit of time

you can use epoxy.

Bit of a one-way solution, but effective.

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Facebook gives itself mission to 'bring the world closer' by getting people off Facebook

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"More surprising is that Zuckerberg thinks his platform can make a difference."

How is that a surprise?

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NASA? More like NASAI: Brainy robots 'crucial' to space exploration

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Autonomous exploration of Alpha Centauri

"I wonder how they'll solve that little problem."

With several really big antennas, preferable positioned somewhere in space where they have a good 'line of sight" towards Alpha Centauri?

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Lordy! Trump admits there are no tapes of his chats with Comey

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Sellotape

Over here it's Tesa.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: It only gets worse

"By which we mean, anyone with some cash that the government is able to grab. Which includes pretty much everyone other than the utterly destitute."

It does, however, exclude the really rich.

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US Air Force resumes F-35A flights despite not knowing why pilot oxygen systems failed

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Hmm...

As long as your banter is up to scratch, Bob's your uncle.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Comrades?

"Gant, can you really fly this plane?"

Saw that as it came out in 1982 in London while visiting my sister.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: This might account...

... possibly also for contracting scientology?

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Two words

I initially assumed this had something to do with bits of Toblerone getting stuck in pipes; turns out it's something else entirely.

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BOFH: Putting the commitment into committee

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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The real question here

is whether I can get that icon in cornflower blue.

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Smart burglars will ride the surf of inter-connected hackability

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: WiFi? No problem.

No, first step is to look whether the WiFi is off; indicating that the occupants have left for at least a couple of days.

(Really, it's amazing how many of my neighbours do that when the go on vacations.)

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Genoans flout terror ban with bumper basil hand baggage policy

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Why would anyone bother?

Peugeot makes very good pepper mills.

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'No decision' on Raytheon GPS landing system aboard Brit aircraft carriers

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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BTW, I still maintain that they should have named the second carrier the "Duke of Edinburgh".

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"She is delayed by several months, with both the MoD and the ship’s builders keeping extremely tight-lipped as to why."

My sources tell me that somebody had ordered 'Military Grey' paint instead of 'Battleship Grey" paint.

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Canadian sniper makes kill shot at distance of 3.5 KILOMETRES

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"Let's assume that there were several sighting shots, and that they got closer to the target. Wouldn't the target therefore know that he was under fire, and consequently be unlikely to hold still in an exposed location for nearly 10 seconds?"

Not neccessarily. I dimly remember bits from basic training about stuff like this (but it's been 30 years now), and off the top of my head:

1. You might not even notice a couple of incoming shots around you, depending on what they hit and how buisy you are. Especially if they come from far away and the sound, even if you actually hear it, doesn't match the timing of noise/impact you are familiar with.

2. Let's say you notice and recognize the sighting shots for what they are - but you can't tell where they are coming from. All you know is that there is a sniper somewhere who's really far away. So for all you know, shifting your position might make it easier for the sniper to hit you. At the sime time you know that you are relatively hard to hit where you are right now due to the distance. I guess I'd toss a coin.

3. Let's say you notice the shots - and conclude that someone wants to drive you away from your position. Maybe to lure you into the range of, say a mortar or something like that.

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Uber wants your top tips to mend its rotten image

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Tips

Don't follow leaders.

Watch the parking meters!

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Ego stroking, effusive praise and promise of billions: White House tech meeting in full

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Sorry, citizens are not customers

Exactly. I know I keep repeating myself, but the citizens are the government. Which should not be confused with the administration that is voted in (or out) by the citizens. At least if ee take democracy seriously.

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The Internet of Flying Thing: Reg man returns with explicit shots

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: around 800kg

"I'm perfectly happy buying a paper in the airport if I need news, or reading a book if not."

Unless the airline deceides to charge you for not using their on-board wi-fi, entertainment system, or whatever... because this means you are not producing any sellable data. Wouldn't put it past the likes of RyanAir.

Besides, only terrorists read books on a plane these days!

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Fancy buying our aircraft carrier satnav, Raytheon asks UK

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Does this mean

I actually quite like the idea of a land-based aircraft carrier.

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Oops! Facebook outed its antiterror cops whilst they banned admins

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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No surprise there, really.

Facebook's position basically is that all you need (and therefore all you should have) is your FB account, and just the one.

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Yeah, if you could just stop writing those Y2K compliance reports, that would be great

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Time for Y2.1K

"Besides, many Y2K fixes were really hacks that assumed 20xx after some cut-off year. They run into trouble even before 2100!"

Yes, I vaguely remember that there were fixes on some systems that were more like somewhat questionable workarounds that pushed the problem from 1999 to 2019; the thinking being "that will give us enough time to either fix the problem or replace the systems completely". Well, time's nearly up - does anybody know whether this is still an issue?

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Yahoo! cleanup! will! cost! Verizon! half! a! billion! bucks!

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Mayer for Prez

Well, it's a thought. I'll mention it to Vladimir Vladimirovich at the next briefing.

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Fighter pilot shot down laptops with a flick of his copper-plated wrist

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: You want placebos? Talk to a hi-fi nut

Duh, everybody knows that a CD player sounds better when you put a brick on top of it. Mind you, the brick has to be burnt at the proper temperature at new moon, and from the right sort of clay out of a quarry touching a layline, and has to be angled just so.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"I wonder how many times our bodies totally regenerate during our life-time?"

Depends on how you look at it. There is no such thing as a total body regeneration, but a lot of stuff gets constantly replaced. A lot of your parts are younger than yourself. Your skin has a regeneration cycle of about two weeks, while your small intestine's is about 16 years. Liver, two years. Skeleton, 10 years. And so on. And some stuff doesn't get replaced at all or at at rate that is so slow that it usually amounts to the same, like most of the brain and nervous system.

And it's all done automatically, from a dataset that was created at your conception, using building blocks that were once made in distant stars.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: We need a new word meaning "Something unpleasant and eagerly avoided, but gratefully embraced when necessary."

There's probably something appropiate in "The Meaning of Liff".

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"You get a tie every time you use their ejector seat in anger?"

So, what do you get if you use one for fun?

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Anamnesis and diagnosis. Some people are better at it then others. No matter which field, if you have the privilege to watch someone who's really good at it you get to relive moments of pure wonder from your chilhood. And learn a bit.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Survivors

"Joking apart, I can't help wishing I'd worked on systems that had saved 6000+ lives."

Consider a career in civil engineering.

"Decent job satisfaction there."

Yes.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"And all the other printers hear it, and swear vengeance upon you!"

It's not just the printers...

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Oh snap! Election's made Brexit uncertainty worse for biz, says BT CEO

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: So you'd have published your negotiating strategy in advance?!

Oh come on. Everbody knows what Theresa's negotiating strategy will be like. She has read Donny's book on the subject.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: The gargoyle’s mouth is a loudspeaker

"It seemed to work OK for the Belgians."

Looks like the Netherlands are ready to give it a try as well.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Even less difficult with my plan:

Not bad at all. Needs a bit of work on the details, though.

1) Ask Trump whether we can be annexed to the US as a semi-autonomous state. I like the sound of Trumpania as a name.

Britain would have to get in the queue behind Puerto Rico.

3) [...] In particular adopt US food standards, and let Monsanto run our farming.

Monsanto has just been bought by Bayer.

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Security co-operation unlikely to change post Brexit, despite threats

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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"Nice Community you have there - It would be a shame if anything were to happen to it."

Quite. It's just that Mrs May's approach rather reminds me of the Vercotti brothers rather than, say Vito Corleone.

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Congressman drafts COVFEFE Act to preserve Trump's Twitter tantrums

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Nice one, Mike! Keep going!

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Raspberry Pi sours thanks to mining malware

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: non binary choice

"How do you classify arms deals with Saudi?"

Depends. On where the kick-backs end up.

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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1. Which cryptocurrency exactly? Bitcoin? The mythical Maycoin?*

2. Are there that many Raspberries out in the wild that, even assuming they are connected and still on their default settings, they could mine coin in a useful timeframe?

Somehow this smells like proof of concept.

* A cryptocurrency I have just made up. It is designed for post-brexit Britain, traceable by the authorities, but totally anonymous for anyone else thanks to the ingenious FlexiCrypt system. The FlexiCrypt system, which I have also just made up, uses deep learning AI algorithms that can recognise who is mining and using any given Maycoin and whether it is a legitimate use of it or not. If it is a legitimate use like a donation to the conservative party, the whole transaction stays completely anonymous. If it is used for something clearly related to terrorism like paying for a VPN service, all availiable data is automatically transferred to the relevant authorities.

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Lockheed, USAF hold breath as F-35 pilots report hypoxia

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: I'm surprised...

No surprise. They don't call them "fighter jocks" for nothing. Including the women.

Besides, at that age you are immortal and indestructable. (Until the day life teaches you otherwise.)

Another example courtesy of Lokheed: Germany bought 916 'Starfighter' (30 F-104F, 586 F-104G*, 163 RF-104G and 137 TF-104G, of which 35 were stationed in the USA for training purposes). Roughly one third, 269 machines, were lost in crashes. Another 31 had to be written off due to accidents, making it a nice round 300. Including the last deadly crash in 1984, a total of 116 pilots were killed. In not a single combag sortie. It was nicknamed the 'widowmaker with wings'. I remember jokes from when I was kid along the lines that the cheapest way to aquire a 'Starfighter' was to buy a plot of land and just wait.

And yet there never was any shortage of pilots wanting to fly it. Grown men had tears in their eyes when the F-104 was finally retired in 1991.

* The troubled multi-role version.

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Sharp claims Hisense reverse-ferreted its US telly licence deal

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Who made your TV ?

Don't forget, kids: the best thing about being a consumer in a free market is having lots and lots of different offers to choose from!

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We're not saying we're living in a simulation but someone's simulated the universe in a computer

allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: Are we a simulation?

World on a Wire (1973)

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allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
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Re: I just feel sorry for...

"Honestly, what would you do differently if you knew the truth - gloat?"

I'd try to hack it in order to get access to a few cheat modes. Nothing over the top; just some little tweaks in health, life expectancy, funds.

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