* Posts by Dippywood

37 posts • joined 5 Oct 2015

Detailed: How Russian government's Fancy Bear UEFI rootkit sneaks onto Windows PCs


Re: The real solution

Just a Minix, that's too easy...

Pork pulled: Plug jerked out of beacon of bacon delight


One Purchase Per Customer

Don't be a pig!

Oh Deer! Poacher sentenced to 12 months of regular Bambi screenings in the cooler


...but may also run afoul of US laws forbidding cruel and unusual punishment

This in a country that tells someone that the state will kill them, sometime, eventually, when it finally decides that it can, and then seeks inventive ways to carry out the sentence after a person has spent years on death row.

Hypocritical, to say the least - Frozen should be the least of their worries

Careful with this latest Microsoft release – tug too hard on the threads and it tends to unravel


A special jumper to celebrate the delights of the October build of Windows 10

That would be in BSOD blue, of course...

Shift-work: Keyboards heaped in a field push North Yorks council's fly-tipping buttons


Missed one!

Upon Cursor-y examination...

Robot Operating System gets the Microsoft treatment


Re: Now this is in my head...

Not quite forever...

I think it goes something like this:- "my first instructor was Satya Nadella,...he taught me to sing a song. It goes like this..."

A story of M, a failed retailer: We'll give you a clue – it rhymes with Charlie Chaplin


Re: but there's still Digikey & Mouser

Don't forget the F-word...



Ironic, isn't it?

Maplin started as a mail-order business many, many moons ago - that distance-selling mindset should have helped with the on-line. Ironic that a business that was originally not about retail sites was killed off by the retail side...

UKIP doubled price of condoms for sale at party conference


Re: Not for me

Come again?


First we screwed the country, now let's screw each other.

You're alone in a room with the Windows 10 out-of-the-box apps. What do you do?


If you found yourself in charge of the in-box Windows 10 apps, what would you do with them?

Install Linux

Deliveroo to bike food to hungry fanbois queuing to buy iPhones


Good for the Goose

One imagines that Deliveroo will charge double the going rate for every dish to these queuers in order to get them ready for the Apple technology pricing strategy...

Holy macaroni! After months of number-crunching, behold the strongest material in the universe: Nuclear pasta


Re: making them the densest objects in the known universe.

Trump's head contains vacuum.

So dense that he is not even air-headed - the Trump Dichotomy.

Detroit sh*t shifter's operating costs waste away with Oracle's cloud


The DWSD is now reliant upon...

Oracle Database Excretedata Cloud Service...

Norwegian tourist board says it can't a-fjord the bad publicity from 'Land of Chlamydia' posters


"...so they can make sure they're also forearmed"

Is it the strange practice of "forearming" that spreads it then? No wonder there's confusion regarding the use of the condom...

Microsoft commits: We're buying GitHub for $7.5 beeeeeeellion



... to git while the gittings good

El Reg needs you – to help build an automated beer-transporting robot


To avoid spillage, why not move the beer in some kind of sealed, pressurised container with a tap fitted?

Perhaps one could give such a container a name: keg, perhaps?


HomePod, you say? Sex sex sex, that's all you think about



A comb - to treat the symptoms? Address the problem at source, and make the gift a tongue razor!

Home taping revisited: A mic in each hand, pointing at speakers


Re: C30 C60 C90 Go!

I have this on at least 2 compilation CD's...

Go Wild in the Country and I Want Candy too.

But don't worry, the rest of the compilations contain music

Morrisons launches bizarre Yorkshire Pudding pizza thing


Move it Further North

Freeze the thing in a domestic freezer. When time to cook, cover two Mars-bars in liquid nitrogen and, when down to temperature, remove them from the liquid and shatter them with a hammer.

Place the shattered Mars-bars atop the frozen Yorkshire-pizza thingie, and immerse in a thick beer batter.

Remove coated delicacy from batter and deep-fry.

Server together with Tennant's Super or white cider.

What employs half a million people, just did $44bn in sales, and rhymes with Azerbaijan?


Re: I don't know

Let's not forget the "supercilious, formalistic silly words surround us" form that pops up at every mention of the West Coast.

I prefered the sarky headlines - but someone seems to have taken to heart the old saying "sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." Whether the saying is true or not, I's like to see more of the sarky taglines!

Please activate the anti-ransomware protection in your Windows 10 Fall Creators Update PC. Ta


"The controlled folder access mechanism within Windows Defender prevents suspicious applications from changing the contents of selected protected folders."

Turned this on, went to check email. OUTLOOK.EXE is blocked.


Another well thought out feature, then!

Samsung's Galaxy Note 8 is hot, but not much more than the S8+


Re: "the wrong accents on your text will completely change it's meaning"

I must be a grocer :-)

That is not normally an error I make, but mea culpa


Re: What use the stylus?

They exist - and you are right that the Vietnamese use them well - but you need to remember all the shortcuts to get the diacritics.

Not practical for an occasional user.


What use the stylus?

I have a Note 4, and whilst I like the stylus, in most circumstances it is just a "nice thing to have."

However, there is something for which i have found it essential:- correctly entering Vietnamese text into Google Translate.

For those not in the know, Vietnamese uses the Latin alphabet with diacritics marking the tones, inflexions and guttural stops - having the wrong accents on your text will completely change it's meaning. Since camera input does not work, being able to write the word is very useful, and saves trying to remember the keyboard trickery required to get the right diacritics in the appropriate places.

Since I am married into a Vietnamese family, this is a life-saver!

Niche perhaps, but suits me!

It's paydaygeddon! NatWest account transfers 'disappearing' (not really)


Haven't we been here before? Ah well, BACS to the future

Royal Navy's newest ship formally named in Glasgow yard


HMS Forth, due to enter service with the RPN in 2018...

Too obscure?

Reg man 0: Japanese electronic toilet 1


Warm Seats

I have always thought that the only thing worse than a cold seat is a warm one, since that normally implies that you are a follow-on visitor...

That said, having encountered one of these beasties some years ago in a Japanese-owned hotel in Vietnam, I was left thinking that a small screen on the cubicle door running an animated instructional video might be amusing - just think of the fun one could have with the graphics!

Childcare app bods wipe users' data – then discover backups had been borked for a year


Re: So much for Due Dilligence...

Q. What person smart enough to make backups in the first place fails to check to make sure the backups are useable?

A. An expensive consultant

I am Craig Wright, inventor of Craig Wright


Re: Maybe amanfrommars is Satoshi Nakamoto?

Surely Bob's your uncle.

Don't call him Surely, though.

Learn you Func Prog on five minute quick!


That explaination

My gratitude is infinitesimal...

UK universities unveil £28m hub for Internet of Things


Re: They'll connect the hub to the smart beer fridge...

Perhaps it's a fridge for smart beer...

I would assume that smart beer would contain a "chemical fingerprint" (a la smart water) that would only be apparent once the beer rental period was complete. A quick flash of UV light on the walls and pavements near pubs would show the "audit trails" and allow the problem to be traced back to source.

Now, combining this with the "quick jolt of 230V" mentioned elsewhere and you have a self-correcting and auditable scheme for tackling this particular anti-social habit. But I digress...

WIN a 6TB Western Digital Black hard drive with El Reg


Having joined the "flexible workspace program," Jane now need to prove that she could get into the workspace.


Tech Support? Good. Folded at a right-angle, as requested. No, no, the screen is still not right...

WIN a 6TB Western Digital Black hard drive with El Reg


I can't believe you lugged that all the way into the forest

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