* Posts by Chris Young

48 posts • joined 31 Jul 2007

MH370 airliner MYSTERY: The El Reg Pub/Dinner-party Guide

Chris Young

I'll go for a fire in the electronics bay that caused the blackout, and the plane is now lying at the bottom of the sea ... http://www.wired.com/autopia/2014/03/mh370-electrical-fire/

The 'experts' who never see BBM will never understand RIM

Chris Young

I switched ...

... from a BB Storm to an Android Galaxy about a year ago, and I still miss BBM. It just 'works',* I can put it no better than that.

* occasional outage excepted, of course - before some smartarse feels compelled to point this out.

Vodafone loses access to punters' records in IT cock-up

Chris Young

Their customer website ...

... truly is a pile of pants. Sorry, I can think of no better description for it.

It is so bad, in my experience, as to be virtually unusable.

Do you work in IT at RBS? Or at the next place to get hit ...?

Chris Young
Thumb Up


Cracking article, well done. I'd love to see the face of a senior RBS manager while reading this. Horrified, annoyed, furious ... all thw while knowing there is more than an element of truth to it.

This is possibly the one and only time that I'll say I'm glad I bank with HSBC ...

Firm at heart of biggest oil spill spews toxic web attack

Chris Young

Rather sad ...

... that you choose to mention how much oil was spilt, but no mention of the number of men that died on that horrendous night.

A rather typical fate for those that die in the maritime or offshore industry, unfortunately.

NotW accused of hacking Milly Dowler's voicemail

Chris Young

The only bit that surprises me ...

... is that anyone still buys the News of The World.

Lots of people will claim to be shocked, outraged even. But they'll keep buying the rag.

I personally wouldn't even use a copy as a substitute for toilet paper, no matter how desperate I was ...

Sega’s saggy security

Chris Young

I probably shouldn't ...

... rise to the bait, but ...

These Lulz kids really are a bunch of F*cking Retards. What the f*ck do they teach in schools these days? Anything?

( ... and yes, I know that once you use the 'F' word you lose the argument, but what the hell. It made me feel better, momentarily)

Death threats against 'worst song ever' YouTube teen

Chris Young

What the ...

Good God, I'll admit I've listened to some shite n my time, but that is truly f**king awful. I'd heard of it, but never actually listened to it.

I won't be making that mistake again ...

Spanish cops rush to cuff 'webcam killer'

Chris Young

nothing suitable comes to mind ...

Kind of puts your own problems into perspective, doesn't it?

Google whacks link farms

Chris Young

technical searches

Am I right in saying that there are 'other' search engines for the more technical type of searches, depending on your industry?

Sadly I can be no more helpful, thanks to my crap memery of such things ...

Park the Mario Kart, and throw your keys in the bowl

Chris Young

Finally ...

... the reason I've been looking for to persuade SWMBO of the need for a console.

I shall end the week a happy man ...

Europe opens full probe into Google

Chris Young

Can't think of one

Sounds like a basket of sour grapefruits to me ...

WikiLeaked US cables link China to Google hack

Chris Young
Black Helicopters


I'm with those that think Wikileaks have crossed a line over recent months, and especially now. From all the 'downvoting' this clearly isn't a popular position, but I suspect there are a lot of Daily Mail readers in here today.

While we may not like everything our governments do, at least in this part of the World we have the opportunity to say so, publicly. That is democracy, and we should all be thankful for it.

What Wikileaks is doing nowadays is not helping this process at all, it's merely self-serving publicity for a site that used to do good work, but is now short of cash.

If I was Assange, I'd be avoiding dark alleyways, and rightly so. He is playing dangerous games with the very same democratic process that he will no doubt hope will protect him from harm.


Ryanair wins ihateryanair.co.uk because of £322 ad revenue

Chris Young

@ James Hughes 1

Just because you haven't got much money doesn't mean you need to behave (and look) like a retard, so he has a valid point.

I've seen the same kind of thing as Andrew, and it's not pleasant. The EasyJet queue is often much the same ( I know, because I'm frequently standing in it), but not quite like the RyanAir rabble.

Personally, I subscribe to the "if you don't like 'em, don't use 'em" school of thought. I will NEVER fly Ryan Air, a bit like I never buy fuel in a supermarket. Principles.

It's why I haven't seen my brother who lives in Sweden for years - I can't afford to pay what BA charge, and I won't use RyanAir. SqueezyJet are about to start flying the route though :-)

Mozilla Thunderturkey and its malcontents

Chris Young

"Most people have only ever used webmail..."


Are plasma TVs killing radio?

Chris Young

@ Dave 52

I would. Most of what's on the Magic Box (whatever flavour it is) is shite anyway.

London hospital hosted grumble flick shoot

Chris Young

I propose ...

... A prize to the commentard that can come up with the title of the film in question. I intend to 'research', but not from my office PC.

Mine's the one with the sticky tissues in the pocket.

Microsoft slams coffin lid on Vista

Chris Young

@ Joe Welcome

If you genuinely can't work out whether your SP2 Vista will still be supported, despite reading the article and the comments above, I suggest you sell your PC and spend the money on something simpler.

Woman finds Romanian living in shed

Chris Young

Tilly Newman

Am I the only one to have spotted that Tilly Newman is really quite cute - apart from the fact that she reads The Mail, thus rendering her out-of-bounds for me?

I'll get my coat ...

Britain expels diplomat over faked passports in Hamas hit row

Chris Young

Serves them right

Any British person that goes to live in Israel deserves all they get - having their identity stolen should be the least of the troubles visited upon them. Especially if they then choose to adopt dual-nationality in a country that shouldn't even exist.

They are probably lucky that Mossad didn't just bump them off to stop them whingeing.

UK.gov blames Israel for cloning passports in Dubai hit

Chris Young

Friends ...

"The fact that it was done by a friend ..."

Perhaps this might show the UK government that they should perhaps pick their "friends" a little more carefully.

To think that the country of which I am a tax-paying citizen regards Israel as a "friend" is more than a little galling.

German dentists develop 'painless' plasma tooth-blaster

Chris Young

@ Adam Trickett

Thanks mate - I've got to have a root canal done in a couple of weeks time, and I was already dreading it!

Just reading this article made my toes curl and my bum suck in - I HATE going to the dentist. I had a tooth extracted on Monday morning - a very bad start to the week - it took two dentists almost an hour to get it out (the first had to stop because her arm was hurting - imagine how my face felt!).

Oh, and a dentist explained to me once that if having the injection is sore or uncomfortable, it's likely the dentists fault - if they squeeze too hard on the syringe, it builds up pressure in your gum. She was brilliant - she rarely made me wince, was dead patient with my pansy-like behaviour and almost made me stop worrying about the idea of a visit - then she retired!

I should have listened when my Mum told me to brush my teeth properly all those years ago :-)

Privacy furore forces partial climb-down from Facebook

Chris Young

Surely ...

If you're that worried about it becoming public, don't put it on Facebook. I really don't understand the issue here.

Blackberry Storm 2 9520 touchscreen smartphone

Chris Young


Let's hope it's an improvement on the CrapBerry MKI. I've been lumbered with one of these for nearly a year now, and only in the last month or so have the software updates made the thing anymore use than a paperweight - albeit a paperweight with a battery that goes flat alarmingly quickly.

I'm not tempted, and my MKI effort will be going in the bin when my contract is up ...

P.S. On Vodafones contract, you can't even watch any educational Internet smut without paying Vodafone another £1, "to prove you're 18". Bloody cheek. Or so I've read ...

Microsoft smothers Sage and Intuit challenger

Chris Young

@ "the superior product"

WHAT? I used (or tried to use) Sage for my self-employed accounts, and it was a complete pig for a non bean-counter type like myself ... then I read an article on El Reg about Microsoft Accounting, installed it, and very soon uninstalled Sage and never looked back.

Microsoft ACcounting had a definite place for some people, and was/is much more reliable and easier to maintain. I shall miss it.

The one thing about all this that I think is a little unfair is the short notice that Microsoft have given to users of the product.

Foxconn pays suicidal iPhone engineer family for life

Chris Young

@ Andy Morrell

Smartarse ....

The guys name is (sorry, was) Sun.

You owe El Reg an apology :-)

Microsoft hosts Feynman lecture series

Chris Young

@ David W

I couldn't have put it better myself

Charges against London tube tourist snapper thrown out

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

other peoples children ...

speaking as someone who earns some of my living from selling photographs, if he took pictures of someone elses child, without seeking at the very least a nod of consent, it's hardly surprising that he got into trouble.

He's either impossibly naive, or stupid.

Chris Young

@ AC

"Morden day devolving Britain. What a sad sad place she is becomming."

The standard of English in her schools isn't doing too well either, by the looks


Carphone Warehouse buys Tiscali UK

Chris Young

... award-winning customer service

"It's good news for our customers who will increasingly benefit from a group that has consistently championed best value and award-winning customer service."

Has Mary Turner been drinking?

I think we should be told.

Screeching rails close London Tube station

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

Lucky b**tards ..

at least they bother to lube the rails in London. On the trains around the MiseryRail network up here, they can't be arsed, so we all get to go deaf as we trundle through the tunnel loop, stuck to our chewing-gum covered seats.

Mind you, they frequently can't be arsed running the trains either, especially on the Wirral Line, so that tends to keep the noise down a bit.

Her Ladyship, because even she could run a rail service better than MerseyRail, and she certainly wouldn't be tight with the lube ...

Silverlight 3 and 4 to 'open up new areas' - Microsoft

Chris Young
Dead Vulture

anti mS

Will there ever come a day when the anti-MS fucktards will shut up? Fuck me, you lot are boring. Tha same drivel in the comments to any article that dares use the word Microsoft.

Dogs and arson feature in top 10 data recovery disasters

Chris Young

news or advert ...

how much did DiskLabs pay for this "article" then?

I work for Headland Media, maybe I coukd think up something interesting about our maritime news services that could qualify as a "news story".

I'll get my coat ...

Apple unleashes not-crap iPhone iPod earbuds

Chris Young

F**king iPods

The iPod truly is the audio tool of the devil. If I could ban one item of modern life, it would be the f**king iPod.

As a poor sap that has to travel into work every day on Liverpools MiseryRail network, I can atest that there is very little of the 'personal' about the stereo from one of these devices. Why the fuck can't they design a pair of earplugs that keep the sound in the ear, rather than annoying the crap out of anyone within 20 feet?

I truly, truly hate the iPod.

{Rant over}

Lads from Lagos target Facebook

Chris Young

@ Martin H

I would alter that slightly to ...

"Anyone who uses Facebook deserves to have their PC taken away."

Data Protection the DVLA Way

Chris Young

Moorcroft ..

You don't want to get on the wrong end of them. I had a 'run-in' with BT, who passed the debt to Moorcroft, despite having told me that they had cancelled the debt. Not pleasant.

It makes you wonder who would would want to work in a place like that, and if the rest of the staff are there on sufferance because it's all they can get, no wonder the business is so crap. They reduced an ex of mine to tears once, over a debt that had already been paid.

One of my small pleasures in life is knowing that I once got a debt collector (not from Moorcrofts, sadly) fired, because he phoned my house one afternoon and discussed the full details of my apparent inabilities to pay my bills with our cleaning lady!

B**tards, the lot of 'em.

*Mines the one with the CCJ's tucked in the pocket.

Carpetbomb bug tarnishes Google Chrome

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

Never mind carpetbombing ...

... try visiting a page on MSDN. If it renders many pages as badly as it does the MSDN site, most people will never use it enough to suffer an attack.

Paris, because at least her misrenderings are kinda cute.

Downing Street rejects 'Clarkson for PM' petition

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

@ dervheid

"But the sad git still hates diesel!"

... and he's right.

Diesel sportscars - the bastard offspring of Jeremy Beadle& Noel Edmonds. I'll take my Vrs without the shower of black-soot, thank you :-)

Paris, because she prefers a decent ride.

Yelp 'pay to play' pitch makes shops scream for help

Chris Young

@ GettinSadda

and of course every small business has its own web server these days

Twitter falls silent in the UK

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

Develop a rival ...

Time to develop a rival UK service, I think.

I might call it "Twatter", and have people put a little "Twat Me" button on the bottom of their blog posts.

Paris, for obvious reasons ...

Microsoft Mojave 'outs' secret Vista lovers

Chris Young

Vista SP1 Blue Screen of Death

the chap sat opposite me was fed a breakfast of Vista SP1 first thing on Monday morning ... by elevenses time he was sat looking at a Blue Screen of Death ... first one I've seen in a good while.

His PC is now healthy again, but only because he was able to remove the SP1 update.

Think I'll stay with XP, for now anyway.

Nike pulls Air Stab trainers

Chris Young


reading your comment makes me think that perhaps Nike should call the trainnees (as they apparently call them around here) the "Nike ShitStabbers".

As this probably won't make it past the El Reg censors, I'll just get my coat and leave quietly ...

Ryanair wins German court victory in screen-scraping injunction

Chris Young
Paris Hilton

Thats rich ...

" .... video or software pirates ... "

For Ryanair to accuse anyone else of being a "pirate" is frankly unbelievable.

Paris, because even she couldn't afford a ride with Michael O'Leary

Staff internet policies must be Facebook-ready, warns expert

Chris Young

Oh No ....

... and there I was planning to start a Facebook group for plods that had managed to arrest/harass/embarrass an innocent snapper.

America.com auction fails to hit cash target

Chris Young

Still for sale?

Business.com appears to still be for sale ... or for sale again perhaps.

And to think I was chuffed at getting $900 for a speculatively registered domain name.

(Note to self: Must Try Harder)

Microsoft stuffs Sage with free accounts software

Chris Young

Anything is better ...

Anything, and I mean ANYTHING, that replaces Sage has to be worth a look.

Sage has to be one of the worst software applications that I have had the misfortune to deal with, and as for the cheek of expecting you to pay for support for a product you've bought ... they deserve anything they get IMHO.


Line rental cost a barrier to broadband

Chris Young

I can quite believe it

I work part-time for a small business (Firstmile Community Broadband) supplying wireless broadband in a rural area. People beyond the reach of conventional broadband complain about the lack of service, and say how they'd love to have high-speed Internet Access.

So we tell them we charge £25 pcm - usually with a minimal installation fee - and they bitch about the cost!

There's something about the Internet that seems to make most people think it should be 'Free', and anyone attempting to make eke a living from it is some form of crook. It's the same attitude that drives P2P etc.

But not on our network ;-)

Intelligent Finance upgrade downs web service

Chris Young


Caveat or Cobblers?

Who's to say the test roll out would haev exposed a problem that only became apparent under heavy load?

It needs *Users* to really screw things up :-) Lots of 'em in this case.

Where was BOFH when he was needed, I wonder.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019