* Posts by Aladdin Sane

597 posts • joined 20 Jun 2015

Page:

BOFH: We're only here because they said there would be biscuits

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Biscuits?

People get biscuits. You don't qualify as "people".

14
0

Boffin wins (Ig) Nobel prize asking if cats can be liquid

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Mobile Phones

There's an XKCD for that.

3
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Cats are neither a solid nor a liquid. @Aladdin Sane

I prefer to raise a JFDI request. Remarkably effective.

1
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Babypod

The first words your unborn child hears -

"Did you know that you can claim back your PPI?"

19
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Cats are neither a solid nor a liquid.

'If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.' - Terry Pratchett

Obligatory request for Pterry icon.

64
1

Defrosted starter for 10: Iceland home delivery site spills customer details

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

I bet it was lonely.

2
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Flame

What the fucking fuck is wrong with these people?

7
0

El Reg is hiring an intern. Here's the lowdown...

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Let me make a prediction...

In true BOFH style.

1
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: I've made a few tweaks to the copy so the intended audience will understand

All I can glean from that is I'm definitely not the intended audience.

7
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

the chance to read BOFH before we publish it

Sign me up now!

7
0

Apple: Our stores are your 'town square' and a $1,000 iPhone is your 'future'

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Apple copying Microsoft?

As any Whovian will tell you, you don't skip 9.

0
0

'Don't Google Google, Googling Google is wrong', says Google

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Where I grew up we called it witchcraft and IT teachers had a lower life expectancy than DatD teachers at Hogwarts.

I miss Somerset.

6
0

Five ways Apple can fix the iPhone, but won't

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Obligatory XKCD

17
2

Totally uncool California bureaucrats shoot down drone weed delivery

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

You don't allow drone delivery?

It'd be a lot cooler if you did.

0
0

Massive iPhone X leak trashes Apple's 10th anniversary circus

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: of course there's a point in turning up...

Depends on the vibrate function/

1
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Wireless charging

Easier to just charge it in a microwave oven.

1
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: The iPhone 101010

The answer to the great question of life, the universe and everything.

9
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: This isn't a leak

I'm aghast to find such a blatant display of cynicism on this site.

34
0

Apache Foundation rebuffs allegation it allowed Equifax attack

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Facepalm

To make the matter even odder, Equifax hasn't said how it was breached. Just that it was breached by something to do with a web app.

How many people actually read to the bottom of the article? Equifax haven't alleged shit.

1
0

HSBC biz banking crypto: The case of the vanishing green padlock and... what domain are we on again?

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Limits on password

Halifax was part of HBOS, now Lloyds Banking Group.

5
0

SpaceX sneaks in X-37B space plane launch ahead of Hurricane Irma

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Moon Lander

Should give KSP a go.

2
0

Stand up who HASN'T been hit in the Equifax mega-hack – whoa, whoa, sit down everyone

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Credit ratings

So you propose a return to lending to whoever asks for money? Were you around in 2008?

1
1
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Award for Equifax staff

Is that the one supplied by Trump University?

1
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Where's GDPR when you need it?

2
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: "offering every US citizen a year's free identity theft monitoring for those who apply"

Maybe OP meant loose as in release?

1
1

User demanded PC be moved to move to a sunny desk – because it needed Windows

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

open a PC ... and then remove the floppy disk ... without setting off the alarm

So remarkably like the game "Operation"?

5
0

Oracle 'systematically denies' its sales reps their commissions, forces them to work to pay off 'debts', court told

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: seeks $150m in damages.

IIRC, in parts of the US they can't award more than the damages claimed, but they can award less. So the $150M is a speculative figure that even if awarded in full will likely be reduced on appeal.

0
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Why do Oracle still have salespeople

People. What a bunch of bastards.

0
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Why do Oracle still have salespeople

Stockholm syndrome

2
0

Scottish pensioners rage at Virgin cabinet blocking their view

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Since this blocks their view

If it's best-laid, surely it's no longer virgin?

3
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Quick! Quote some poetry at him!

Missing a line.

3
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Since this blocks their view

Are they raging against the dying of the light?

11
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Pint

Re: "and we now have no outlook at all."

My colleagues can't figure out why I'm sat here chuckling.

11
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
20
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Smacks of this

There’s no point in acting surprised about it. All the planning charts and demolition orders have been on display at your local planning department in Alpha Centauri for 50 of your Earth years, so you’ve had plenty of time to lodge any formal complaint and it’s far too late to start making a fuss about it now. ... What do you mean you’ve never been to Alpha Centauri? Oh, for heaven’s sake, mankind, it’s only four light years away, you know. I’m sorry, but if you can’t be bothered to take an interest in local affairs, that’s your own lookout. Energize the demolition beams.

39
4
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: install a window

Linux would be better.

62
6
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

It's Scotland

Are they really going to miss the 2 whole days of sunshine they get?

26
13

Dude who claimed he invented email is told by judge: It's safe to say you didn't invent email

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Give peas a chance.

16
0

Smart cities? Tell it like it is, they're surveillance cities

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Welcome

to Mega City One.

6
0

Asteroid Florence buzzes Earth, brings two moons along for the ride

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: only ones saved

Also the source of one of Community's finest ever in-jokes.

0
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Bah!

Would you like to know more?

6
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: only ones saved

Multi pass!

12
0

Sub plot subplot thickens: Madsen claims hatch fumble killed Swede journo Kim Wall

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Hes

You don't say?

4
1

Futuristic driverless car technology to be trialled on... oh, a Ford Mondeo

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Testing in Oxford

Not to mention an over abundance of inebriated students.

4
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Trollface

Testing in Oxford

So nothing above 10mph.

5
0

Well, whad'ya know? 'No evidence' that Obama wiretapped Trump Tower

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

My brain read that as "They have just had their office servers shredded though".

8
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: Twitler lied?

Pretty sure their lips move when they're reading, and that they use their finger to keep track of where they are in a sentence.

20
5

15 'could it be aliens?' fast radio bursts observed in one night

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

Re: What are the chances?

The chances of anything coming from Mars are a million to one.

Which, as we all know, happens 9 times out of ten.

13
0
Aladdin Sane
Silver badge

I suggest you google 'the united federation of "hold my beer, i got this"'

9
1

Linus Torvalds passed a kidney stone and then squeezed out Linux 4.13

Aladdin Sane
Silver badge
Trollface

Re: “Better, smaller, code.”

He's now fitter, happier, more productive.

2
0

Page:

Forums

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2017