* Posts by Sleep deprived

143 posts • joined 29 May 2015

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Prez Trump orders Uncle Sam to step up AI efforts – we all know the White House knows a lot about artificial intelligence

Sleep deprived
Thumb Up

When you're out of the real stuff...

It's time to go with the artificial flavor.

It's 2019, and a PNG file can pwn your Android smartphone or tablet: Patch me if you can

Sleep deprived

Re: My Samsung Tab 8 is at 7.1.1

Apply patches I meant to write.

Sleep deprived
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My Samsung Tab 8 is at 7.1.1

...but with last security fix in August 2017. Why bother look for bugs if devices don't get patched by manufacturers and users cannot apply pressure themselves?

Tell NASA to grab the margarita mix – a sextillion-kg salty ring found floating in space

Sleep deprived
Coat

Any trace of pepper or paprika?

(that's all the spices we had at home at the time this cloud formed).

Japanese astronomers find tiniest Kuiper Belt object yet – using cheap 'scopes and off-the-shelf CMOS cameras

Sleep deprived

the still undiscovered Oort Cloud?

"We also have our sights set on the still undiscovered Oort Cloud out beyond that," said Arimatsu.

Does he mean we never observed an object in the Oort Cloud, yet we know it exists?

Do you feel 'lucky', well, do you, punk? Google faces down magic button patent claim

Sleep deprived
Go

"Obvious"

This is a word I'd like to hear more often in judges' mouth over ridiculous patent claims, round corners and others.

RIP 2019-2019: The first plant to grow on the Moon? Yeah, it's dead already, Chinese admit

Sleep deprived
Facepalm

"we could not simulate the lunar environment"

Well, just sprout a cotton seed, drop it in liquid air and that's pretty much what you get on the Moon. Don't worry about microgravity and cosmic radiation.

China's really cotton'd on to this whole Moon exploration thing: First seed sprouts in lunar lander biosphere

Sleep deprived
Alert

A chicken and egg problem settled on the Moon

Ever wondered what came first, fruit flies or fruits? The Chinese settled it for you on the Moon. Those flies are now awaiting the first lunar kitchen to be built.

Sleep deprived
Happy

Re: Why cotton ?

They couldn't find polyester seeds.

World's first robot hotel massacres half of its robot staff

Sleep deprived
WTF?

The room doll was removed

They went back to the dumb inflatable rubber model?

Boffins build blazing battery bonfire

Sleep deprived
Happy

Re: actually never

Rest assured that when the Sun engulfes Earth, beach sand will melt.

Brit bomb hoax teen who fantasised about being a notorious hacker cops 3 years in jail

Sleep deprived
Happy

"...and your motivation of seeking notoriety"

He's now had his pic in El Reg. Check.

It's 'nyet' again, yet again, for Kaspersky: Appeal against US govt ban snubbed by Washington DC court

Sleep deprived
Thumb Down

Re: I wonder how much this is helping their sales...

Well, this year they lost my money after I got fed up with their popups for a third-party proxy and their invasion of every web form with their unsolicited keyboard. But as they don't ask why you leave, they'll probably put the blame on that US campaign.

NASA's Mars probe InSight really has Mars in sight: It beams back first pic after touchdown

Sleep deprived
Happy

Why not drop a selfie-camera?

Instead of a ground-facing first pic, Insight should have used its robotic arm to drop a camera and take a selfie...

Microsoft menaced with GDPR mega-fines in Europe for 'large scale and covert' gathering of people's info via Office

Sleep deprived
Stop

"The Dutch authorities are working with the company to fix the situation"

Instead of trying to fix the unfixable, maybe it's time they work with LibreOffice instead...

Guilty: The Romanian ransomware mastermind who infected Trump inauguration CCTV cams

Sleep deprived
Happy

"ensured that the surveillance camera system was operational prior to the Inauguration"

Had they been successful, we would not have witnessed the "biggest crowd ever for a presidential inauguration" was the first alternate fact of this new era...

Google Chrome: HTTPS or bust. Insecure HTTP D-Day is tomorrow, folks

Sleep deprived
Unhappy

Not so simple

I have a small static HTML page from which users can download my freeware. No forms, no e-commerce. My ISP gave me an early warning of the upcoming Google's handling of http traffic, so following their help page, I got a LetsEncrypt certificate, added an .htaccess file to redirect traffic to https, and then my webpage went blank due to "mixed content" where my webpage has http references to outside articles, etc. Not much I could do about that, so I just reverted to http.

Foot lose: Idiot perv's shoe-mounted upskirt vid camera explodes

Sleep deprived
Happy

"Attempt to shoot covert "upskirt" clips of women's underwear"

I would suspect he was hoping for some commando outfit...

Another staffer at mega-hacked Equifax slapped with insider trading rap

Sleep deprived
FAIL

"... charged with insider trading – and has promised to pay back his alleged ill-gotten gains."

By the same token, can I rob a bank, and if I get caught by the cops upon exiting, just give the money back and walk free?

Google says Pixel 2's narcoleptic display is being fixed in June update

Sleep deprived
Mushroom

"we can't ship overseas"

These megacorps that advertise globally and take your money everywhere on the planet but only provide service to US customers really piss me off. Why trade and service borders don't match is beyond me!

Astroboffins trace mysterious noise from hard rock in space

Sleep deprived
Holmes

"nanodiamonds that are so tiny, they cannot be seen by most microscopes."

When was the last time a microscope was used on these protostellar disks?

Which? calls for compensation for users hit by Windows 10 woes

Sleep deprived
Happy

"to be fair, Windows 10 has excellent security defences"

Good enough to kill Windows 10 telemetry?

Clock blocker: Woman sues bosses over fingerprint clock-in tech

Sleep deprived

Re: '... first obtain permission and a written release from the subject"

If biometrics are used for access or time management and you don't want it, you may be refused for the job. Decades ago, they day I went to sign my work contract, I told HR I wasn't interested in the collective life insurance. I was harshly told it was part of the work conditions, and if I didn't want it, I just had to return home...

Sleep deprived
FAIL

'... first obtain permission and a written release from the subject"

If your job depends on it, this kind of false opt-in condition is pretty phony, and shouldn't be left up to employees.

Stingray phone stalker tech used near White House, SS7 abused to steal US citizens' data – just Friday things

Sleep deprived
Happy

So long as the Orange Clown's tweets get relayed

...nobody will notice the tower is fake.

Crypt-NO-coins: US city bans mining funbux on its electrical power grid

Sleep deprived
Happy

Re: Wrong lake

It's not Niagra, but Niagara (with three a's), or was your mind on something else?

Google assisting the Pentagon in developing AI for its drones

Sleep deprived
Happy

I'm Feeling Lucky

Google your name to see if death is coming from above.

Inviting nearby exoplanet revealed as radiation-baked hell

Sleep deprived

Re: Need I finish the book?

"Published in 2013"

So the foreword should be an in memoriam...

Chilly willies: Swedish nudie nightclub opens in -11°C to disgust of locals

Sleep deprived

Re: IT?

No need to store them, they keep them in their hand all the time. But they need somewhere to hide them when crossing the entrance gate...

Oi! Verizon leaked my fiancée's nude pix to her ex-coworker, says bloke

Sleep deprived
Happy

I got those pics too

but didn't know who she was. I'll now get in touch.

That was fast... unlike old iPhones: Apple sued for slowing down mobes

Sleep deprived

Re: That probably explains..

My girlfriend's J1 from Samsung has a replaceable battery...

Out, damned Spot! Amazon emits Echo ball with screen, inevitable ever-listening mic

Sleep deprived
Happy

Time to start selling my widget on Amazon

It's just called "Ah A Aaaaaa"

Did the Earth move for you, too? Grav waves sensed from black holes' bang 1.8bn LYs away

Sleep deprived

Re: 3 suns just vanished?

How is matter converted into gravitational energy?

El Reg is hiring an intern. Apply now before it closes

Sleep deprived
Trollface

What we offer you in return is: a desk with a seat (TBC) in our London office

I didn't know you had an office. I imagined a laptop and a seat at the food court/pub/loo.

CERN ready to test an even bigger gun

Sleep deprived
Unhappy

Re: "... and its use of hydrogen protons"

Maybe downvoters should check icons...

Sleep deprived
Joke

"... and its use of hydrogen protons"

As opposed to heavier protons? Why start with ligther protons if it's to make them 5% heavier?

Fake ruse: USA Today calls the FBI after half of its 15m Facebook Likes turn out to be bogus

Sleep deprived

"fool legitimate FB users into making (fake) friends with these fake accounts"

Aren't most FB friends kinda fake anyways? Like they'd rather stay home and watch you move flat than actually come and haul boxes?

Fire fighters get grinding on London man’s trapped genitalia

Sleep deprived

England and Ireland top the list

Something with the United Ringdom?

Male escort forgot pregnancy protection, scores data protection instead

Sleep deprived

Entrapment?

Maybe the lady told "Michael" she had some form of contraception while she was actually looking for a genitor. I don't see him having any sort of "parental project", and abortion is freely available in Germany, surgical or not. Case closed.

FTC urged to probe easily penetrated telly-enabled teledildonic toy

Sleep deprived
Happy

Internet of Toys

- Ma'am, telemetry has informed us your... *ahem* toy is about to run out of power and our records indicate you're a heavy user so you might not want to wait the recharge time.

- You're bringing me a fresh power pack to swap in?

- Unfortunately, my service truck is lacking spare parts. But you may want to settle for the real thing... I'm here to help.

A very Canadian approach: How net neutrality rules reflect a country's true nature

Sleep deprived
Happy

McDonald's breakfast

Unless you're broke, there's little point going to the golden arches when there's a better Cracker Barrel nearby.

Man nicked trying to 'save' beer from burning building

Sleep deprived
Facepalm

Bud Ice Premium?

Leaving it to boil in fire could only make it better. Can't get much worse. Poor judgment indeed.

Nuh-uh, Google, you WILL hand over emails stored on foreign servers, says US judge

Sleep deprived
Facepalm

"if Google was able to pull up the data on its own machines in the US"

Last time I checked, I could read my Gmail messages from any country, regardless of where they were stored (only my mom would hesitate to write, assuming her reply would not reach me abroad ;)

UK boffins steal smartmobe PINs with motion sensors

Sleep deprived

Re: And yet, it's so very, very easy to fix..

I've been wondering about this since the first day I use an Android phone: why is the pattern always to be drawn on screen at the same spot? It could probably be found just by the smear

Software dev cuffed for 'nicking proprietary financial trading code'

Sleep deprived
Happy

"concerned about losing his job"

At least he secured a place for sleeping

Goodbye, cruel world! NASA's Cassini preps for kamikaze Saturn dive

Sleep deprived

"before atmospheric compression destroys the probe"

Couldn't this be prevented by leaving a door open?

Londoners will be trialling driverless cars in pedestrianised area

Sleep deprived

What a smart idea

Testing driverless cars on car-free sidewalks and bike paths. Who would've though of that. What next? Testing Goggle's self-driving bicycle on highways?

Astroboffins stunned by biggest brown dwarf ever seen – just a hop and a skip away (750 ly)

Sleep deprived

"Failed star"

Where are those million monoliths when you need them?

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