* Posts by Jimmy2Cows

459 posts • joined 6 Feb 2015

Page:

ROBOT INVASION has already STARTED in HIPSTERLAND

Jimmy2Cows
Devil

Bot tipping anyone?

Like cow tipping but from the comfort and safety of your own cubicle.

Fell the soulless automatons and take bets on how long the sucker, sorry, operator, on the other end has to plead for rescue.

Extra points awarded for reducing the operator to tears or inducing threats to fire everyone.

Jimmy2Cows

Some jobs you need to be in the office for

Some jobs you don't.

For the jobs requiring physical presence, the bot won't suffice.

For the ones you really can do remotely, the bot is a needless expense that achieves nothing.

Seems to me like another solution looking for a problem.

Won't stop hipster twats using them though, annoying the crap out of everyone who naively thought they'd gotten a respite from the irritating tits when they started working from home.

Swedish city demands £40,000 to repair teenage hacking spree

Jimmy2Cows

£40k to change 600 passwords

Were do I apply? I'll do it for £30K in my lunch break.

Jimmy2Cows

@LucreLout

That should happen, of course, but that means they'd have to admit they screwed up. Which is never gonna happen.

Far better to say "we were hacked" because Joe Public believes hackers are scarey evil monsters. Saying "someone found our unsecured, unencrypted password database and showed us what a bunch of morons we are" doesn't have the same ring.

Heads have rolled. Sadly, as ever, the wrong ones.

Jimmy2Cows

Well said. Sadly this is the way it always goes down. Fail to implement proper security, and when someone does "hack" the system send the "hacker" the bill for daring to point out the incompetence.

Philae's either screening Rosetta's calls or isn't home

Jimmy2Cows

@Uncle Ron: Reading comprehension

My, aren't we tetchy.

Seems like everyone else grasped the distinction. Perhaps try comprehending an article's content before firing off shouty comments?

Russia's Putin IT spend in reverse gear, fast

Jimmy2Cows
Pirate

To paraphrase Red Dwarf:

"Things to remember: Stop milk, pay papers, invade Crimea."

Invasions ain't cheap you know. Something's gotta give, and what power-mad ex-KGB nutjob needs working IT anyway?

Another GDS cockup: Rural Payments Agency cans £154m IT system

Jimmy2Cows
Facepalm

Design by committee and this is what you get

40-plus suppliers designing the front end. How did they expect it would go down?

As ever too much focus on pretty pretty, no focus on the thing actually doing what it's meant to.

Way to chuck away another half billion quid, GDS.

Ark of the Government deal confirmed, joint venture established

Jimmy2Cows
Coat

Re: where to start...

Don't worry. It'll be examined by top men...

NORK internet outage was payback for Sony hack – US politician

Jimmy2Cows
Coffee/keyboard

"I think the French broke the overnight build, can we invade Calais ?"

Damn you now I've gone and spat a (unfathomably) popular brown flavourless sugar-free fizzy drink everywhere.

Watchdog slaps American Apparel's youthful naked arse

Jimmy2Cows
Thumb Up

+1

We can all sleep safe in our beds tonight knowing another company has been chastised for not breaking the law. Thank you, ASA.

Jimmy2Cows

Family Guy

Shades of the PTV episode...

"Gentlemen, we got 20 calls about the David Hyde-Pierce incident. And as you know, one call equals a billion people, which means 20 billion people were offended by this. Needless to say, something must be done."

Jimmy2Cows
WTF?

Not seeing the problem here. Swimsuit adverts show similar views and aren't banned.

Some people have too much time on their hands, clearly. Have to wonder about those who look at an obviously adult model and see underage.

Facebook unveils P2P moola-to-mates payment feature

Jimmy2Cows
Devil

Oh Hell No!

No No No No No

FB payments: See Icon ---->

My self-driving cars may lead to human driver ban, says Tesla's Musk

Jimmy2Cows
Coat

Re: let alone a (what's the collective noun - Johnny Cab?) collection of them.

Wreckage

Internet Explorer LIVES ON, cackle sneaky Microsoft engineers

Jimmy2Cows

Re: IE8. sympathy please

I know where you're coming from. I have some GM workshop manuals which I have to view inside a VM running XP, and I had to install IE8 to read the damn things. Anything newer wouldn't fly, wasn't compatible.

Then I discovered that MS has gone out of their way to make it impossible to download the older IE versions from them, so I had to download from one of those installer archives, file hippo or some such stupidly named thing, and hope it wasn't infested with crapware.

Large private bodies are just as bad for this legacy crap as public ones.

Galileo! Galileo! Galileo good to go after six-week recovery effort

Jimmy2Cows
Coat

Small satellite, or a really big LED bulb?

Body of the satellite looks exactly like my GU10 LED spot lights in that pic

Google Glass DIED from TOO MUCH ATTENTION, Captain Moonshot admits

Jimmy2Cows

Re: He missed the main problem...

Nah, it's not a stupid idea but they clearly either didn't think things through enough, or didn't care about the consequences, prior to such a widespread release. And they didn't do enough to curtail undesirable use after the fact.

Context is key, and there are many use cases for this kind of AR. Just the majority don't involve being sat in a bar, or acting like a selfish thoughtless arrogant twat. Or both.

Samsung puts eight-core processor IN A WATCH

Jimmy2Cows

Really!?!

Eight cores in a watch, just because the chip happens to be low power?

Nothing to do with willy waving about how much grunt their watch has over the competition, then. No sir. All about the low power use.

I mean what the hell could you need to do on a watch that'd need eight different things running absolutely concurrently, instead of task scheduling like a single core device has to?

If Sammy really wanted to increase battery life why not create a new chip on the same 14nm process with, I dunno, say a dual core 1GHz? Seems like plenty for a watch. Nah. Can't slap anyone with your dick with those specs.

Eight cores is trying to win a pissing contest. Nothing more, nothing less. The endurance gains are incidental.

US military CANCELS US$1.6 BEEELLION VMware deal

Jimmy2Cows

Re: The Continuing Fall and Fall of Empires and the PNAC. Sieg Heil

"What the flying f*ck are you wittering on about you cretin!"

New to these parts, huh?

Aged 18-24? Don't care about voting? Got a phone? Oh dear...

Jimmy2Cows

Apathy

Da yoof don't care about voting because whatever shower of shite gets in the outcome for them is the same. So they can't be arsed, don't see the point, or simply don't give a shit. Or they're too cool for all that intelligent crap and would rather be down the pub lining up the Stellas.

Either way, spamming them with a barrage of texts is not going to improve voter turnout. Piss them off? Yeah. Get them to vote? No chance.

Google MURDERS Google Code, orders everyone out to GitHub and co

Jimmy2Cows
WTF?

Immediate...?

Since when does the end of 2016 count as immediate? It's not even becoming read-only for 5 months.

Devs don't care about cloud-specific coding, right? Er, not so

Jimmy2Cows
Meh

Sweeping statements

"Who doesn’t now consider themselves to be a cloud developer and a mobile (served from the cloud) developer?"

Me. And everyone who works with me.

I find all this cloud buzz rather pretentious. Some things have a place in the cloud. Many, many things should be as far from the cloud as possible.

Should online pirates get the same sentences as offline ones?

Jimmy2Cows

"“I’m a musician,” explained one interviewee in the report. “Since 2000 I have seen an estimated 75% drop in sales and income. I have no doubt whatsoever that the well-known practice of downloading from pirate sites is the cause."

This presupposes the drop in sales is not simply due to the artist becoming crap.

And yes I know they went on to talk about take-down notices, but that could easily be for singular uploads that very few people actually torrented, hence the potential loss of income via that channel could be way lower than 75% of year 2000 earnings.

People tend to exaggerate if they think it will benefit their case. Simples.

Rosetta probe to try contact with Philae lander on Thursday

Jimmy2Cows

Bit confused...

Why do they need to send it wake-up commands if "it will turn on, heat up further and attempt to charge its battery" when receiving more than 5.5W and internal temps exceed -45 degrees C?

Sounds like "turn on" in this context means going into a standby mode.

The voters hate Google. Heeeeyyyy... how about a 'Google Tax'?

Jimmy2Cows

Re: Hmmm

Not sure why you got downvoted for this, Tim. Maybe the typos? Have an upvote from me.

Guess some people can't accept the reality of the situation. As things stand, no laws have been broken, therefore no action can be taken against the multinationals.

Perhaps the way around all this is to legislate that all sales in this country must be done by a company registered in this country. That way all sales to UK clients occur in the UK and are therefore taxable at UK corporation rates. However IANAL and expect that runs contrary to some trade treaty, tax agreement or whatever. And all EU countries would likely need to enact a similar law at the same time to be effective. I dunno. Just putting it out there.

UK Gov SciTech advice bureau suggests keeping Tor alive to reduce street crime

Jimmy2Cows

"POSTnotes have no official status, but are intended to “anticipate policy implications for parliamentarians” and “help parliamentarians examine science and technology issues effectively.”

Anyone think parliamentarians actually read any of these?

Have to wonder given the crap that floods forth from Westminster about anything science or technology related.

Perhaps POST should include some pretty pictures or popup models in their report. Or a wad of 50s in each copy.

Jimmy2Cows

Funny (but not the 'ha ha' kind) how the sensible reports are always unofficial and have no power, no weight behind them, whereas the reports that shape policy are written either by incompetent morons with zero grasp of the subject at hand, or by people who stand to gain from the recommendations made in said report.

'Rowhammer' attack flips bits in memory to root Linux

Jimmy2Cows

Re: Re. RowHammer

Surely it'd be easier to replace the power supply than battling manufacturers for an NDA. For a few quid you could continue your glorious endeavour, rather than blaming your inability to proceed on lack of an NDA...

Is there a cure for cancer sitting at the back of the medicine cabinet already?

Jimmy2Cows

Re: @Gordon 10, I sincerely hope

Ok downvoters - prove me wrong. No business purposely puts themselves out of business. And just because it's called a "charity" doesn't mean it is not run to keep the directors of said charity in lucrative employment.

Jimmy2Cows

@Gordon 10, Re: I sincerely hope

Very likely. But stop for a second and think what happens to all these cancer charities if a cure is found... boom they go out of business overnight. It's in their own interests to keep finding new treatments but never find a cure, and if they discover a cure then cover it up before anyone outside hears of it.

Hated smart meters likely to be 'a costly failure' – MPs

Jimmy2Cows

"aims to install smart meters in 100 per cent of UK homes and businesses"

I can personally guarantee that will fail.

A "smart" meter in my home? Over my rotting corpse.

Canadian bloke refuses to hand over phone password, gets cuffed

Jimmy2Cows

Dude stop giving them ideas

Bad news: Robo-cars will make you work billions more hours. Good news: In 2040

Jimmy2Cows

Re: Population Growth Rate

"As such, the number of mechanics, etc. necessary to maintain the vehicles will not decline."

Bingo. It's a fallacious argument to say all those jobs will suddenly disappear when cars can all drive themselves. Smells like FUD to me.

There will likely still be the same number of vehicles on the road. Probably many more than now. All those vehicles will still need to be maintained.

Grease monkeys will definitely have to retrain for the new technologies, but the role won't disappear.

Jimmy2Cows

@Larry F54; Re: Having cars that will park themselves will also free up space in cities

Just because you're happy with random strangers in your car, or a significantly longer commute while you drive around picking up people you work with, does not mean anyone else is

And don't try the argument of "people car sharing could drive to the home of the person driving the commute" because that doesn't deal with the amount of traffic on the roads, just moves it around and worsens local congestion.

Not everyone lives in close proximity to their work colleagues, and there's a dozen reasons why work colleagues might be unwilling, uncomfortable, or find it outright inappropriate to car-share with other workmates.

IMHO the way to reduce traffic on the roads requires multiple synchronous, complimentary solutions.

Removing the need to commute in the first place would be a good start. Not every job can be done from home, but many can with common technology and the right managerial mindset. Tends to be the overbearing micromanagement types that are most resistant to the idea of remote working.

Stagger school start and end times perhaps, for different schools in an area or even different year groups in the same school.

Stagger work hours so there's no big peak morning and evening rush.

Stuff like that.

Saying people should car share is simply failing to address the issues at hand, and will not make the impact you thing it will

Tired of IoT hype? Internet of SLUGS and SPIDERS is the reality

Jimmy2Cows

Re: "Better seals are being installed to keep the slugs out"

So, what... they're going to use elephant seals instead of Weddell seals? How do the seals feel about this? Someone call PETA!!!

Privacy? What privacy? EU's draft law on your data is useless, say digital rights orgs

Jimmy2Cows

Re: good for goose

Indeed.

"The council said “the right to the protection of personal data is not an absolute right” in the text."

I'm sure they will continue to say this when their own very personal and private data is on the line...

Jimmy2Cows

Re: It would be interesting ....

There should be a legally binding requirement of full public disclosure about such interests for anyone taking public office, with severe criminal penalties for taking the piss.

IBM sued for talking up semiconductor business it couldn't give away

Jimmy2Cows
FAIL

Re: Worthless chip manufacturing plant??

Could probably have made your point without resorting to blatant sexism

Telly behemoths: Does size matter?

Jimmy2Cows

Re: are you sure ?

Sounds about right.

As a young un my we had no TV until the mid 80s. Remember having to go next door to watch stuff like the A-Team and Knight Rider. Well, I was 10. Over the next few years me and my brother acquired a 12" portable each for our bedroom as my Dad's business writing programming books grew.

Fast-forward 30 years and our three kids each have a 32 in their bedroom, we have a 42 in the lounge and another 42 in the master bedroom. Scarey amount of crap telly watched in this house.

Ads watchdog: Er, what does woman in her undies have to do with ‘slim’ phone?

Jimmy2Cows

Re: Overtly sexualising women

"You seem to have missed the memo. A woman is only allowed to be sexy when she intends to be in a self empowering way especially relatively to a man"

Not only that, but to a specific man.

Any other men had better not find her attractive and make unwanted advances, because they would be.. well.. unwanted, and she'll take offence.

But don't ignore her or indicate she's unattractive either as she'll, yup, take offence.

SIM hack scandal biz Gemalto: Everything's fine ... Security industry: No, it's really not

Jimmy2Cows
Pint

Re: Do we have admission of the attacks?

Would be nice, but since it'll never happen have an upvote and a beer instead

Small cells are like DRUNKS. They don't use lamp posts for light, they use 'em for support

Jimmy2Cows
Meh

Elephant

"It’s all very well being able to get the mobile signal to the eNodeB on the street light but getting the voice or data from the lights to the phone network is a tougher problem.

TTP kind of employs a SEP (somebody else’s problem) field solution to this, but offers a partial answer in the form of an a Gigabit interface for S1/X2 and provides Power Over Ethernet..."

And there's the elephant in the room. It still requires digging up the roads/pavements, or persuading existing infrastructure owners to permit access to their ducting. So massive, widespread, long-term disruption with lamp post cells, instead of localised short-term disruption from building a bigger cell tower with more coverage.

Jimmy2Cows

Ongoing drive,,,

Around here there's an ongoing drive to turn off street lights between midnight and 5 am as the council's skint.

Hopefully that means each individual lamp is controlled so it may be switched on/off remotely without killing the power supply. Knowing how our council likes to "plan" things they probably just pull the plug at the control centre. That's the kind of thing that could kill this idea dead.

Can't imagine residents being happy about loss of mobile signal overnight. Sure, I'd hope there'd be fallback to a larger cell, but I can easily see the cellco's removing the larger cells if they have street-light coverage. Cost savings and all that.

Trolls prevail because good men do nothing: boffins

Jimmy2Cows

>Their answers is to talk to the bully and explain how they're hurting your feelings...

Reminds of a conversation with my 5 year old son's school teacher about bullying. One of his classmate's had been pushing him around, literally, and telling the teacher was doing nothing.

Should have seen the look of horror on her face when we said we teach our son that if someone tries to hurt him he has the right to defend himself, to fight back. We do not teach him that he can start a fight, only that self defense is allowed.

"Oh no. No no no. You can't do that. No, when we are told of one child bullying another, we talk to the aggressor an give them a sad cloud over their sunshine."

Say what? A sad cloud covering their photo on the classroom wall for a day. Yeah that'll show them once and for all not to be a bully.

In the end my son had enough of being pushed around and very loudly threatened his attacker that he'd throw him into the rubbish bin. He's 5 remember. Did the trick though. He's not been bullied since.

Talking to bullies does not work. Never has. It only reinforces how much pain they've inflicted and boosts their ego. Plus they get in trouble, which they don't like and will only ever make the bullying worse.

I don't like confrontation, certainly would prefer not visit violence on anyone, but with bullies it's all they understand.

Now with Grunt and Gulp: Cross-platform ASP.NET in new Visual Studio 2015 preview

Jimmy2Cows
Facepalm

Re: Can run cross platform (XP?)

Do you seriously mean you spent the last 14 years thinking Windows XP was supposed to be cross platform?

Really???

Australian ISPs agree to three-strikes-plus-court-order anti-piracy plan

Jimmy2Cows

Re: But...

If you're then only adult in the house, it's likely you would be considered responsible. If your sons etc. are over majority age, big content should have to prove who did the deed. Of course big content don't give a crap about this and will attempt to sue whomever the holds the account linked to the infringing IP address regardless of how many other people had access.

Watch a hot, speeding space alien explode all over Earth's Beaver

Jimmy2Cows

Re: re: The meteor ... didn't hit Earth so much as we hit it

Well we did hit it from behind, so that'd be our fault. Gaia!! Stop texting whilst driving and look where you're fucking going!

Rule 1: Never admit liability

iBank: RBS, NatWest first UK banks to allow Apple Touch ID logins

Jimmy2Cows

@boltar Re: Not smart.

Slow down there big man. It's not that simple.

Last time I checked, the Natwest app doesn't allow money to be sent to just anyone. It can only send money to accounts that have been previously registered as payees in the full online banking website, and at least one payment to them has to have already been made on the website.

Otherwise all you can do is see how much is in there, and send money to existing payees already set up. Of course the thief might be an existing payee, and some thieves are stupid enough to send money to themselves, but it's unlikely.

Worst case is your gummy-bear wielding chancer gets a cardless cashpoint code, which is only good for a few hundred quid. Sure that might clean out some accounts, but we're not talking thousands and thousands.

To set up a payee requires logging in to full online banking, having the bank card, its pin and the card reader. If your thief has all that you were already screwed long ago.

Home Office wins appeal against £224m e-Borders payout

Jimmy2Cows

The balls on Raytheon...

...to screw up so badly our gov cancels a contract and still demand termination charges.

Given the shit gov.uk battles to carry on with despite ongoing monumental cockups, this one must have been a fucking disaster.

Page:

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019