* Posts by Jimmy2Cows

459 posts • joined 6 Feb 2015


Google versus the EU: Sigh. You can't exploit a contestable monopoly


Umm, what?

Go do a product search, notice how there's no Amazon results? Amazon won't pay to be listed in Google's comparison (yes, they charge for listings) so you as a consumer are prevented from seeing what could be the cheapest option.

Well your first sentence is just bollocks. I search for plenty of products and see Amazon listings all the time, usually high up the first page. Tends to be 50/50 between Amazon and Ebay for the number 1 spot.

And even if your first sentence were true, how is your second assertion in any way Google's fault? Amazon would have the option to pay. If Amazon chose not to pay, well then lack of Amazon listings would be Amazon's fault. Not Google's.

In other, shocking, news, shit offered free to the public isn't always offered on the same terms to commericial entities. Get over it.


Re: So....

oh goody, I can de-install "play store" from my phone then?

Maybe, maybe not. But you aren't forced to use it. There are alternatives even if using them requires more work.

You seem to be berating the maker of your phone OS for giving you easy access to other products that work with your phone OS...

Japan showcases really, really fast … whoa, WTF was that?!


Re: De-acceleration

Ummm you think they've not thought of this?

Wheels. In the event of power loss, magnetic field failure etc, it has wheels so when it drops onto the track it rolls to a controlled, less brown-trouser-inducing halt.


Re: And in the UK

Yeah, and leaves on the line will still be the excuse...

Nothing to do with the mish-mash collection of ownerships of the track, stations, points, junctions, tunnels, trains, delayed inadequate overrunning maintenance, piss poor tracks, inability to competently schedule to less that half hour accuracy, incompetent management. No. It'll be leaves.

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Re: It would be great...

Had the same thought about TSA involvement re point (5). Any gains made from the higher speeds will immediately be undermined at least two-fold by the "need" for security theatre, cos, you now, terrists...


@Robert Helpmann: obvious solution...

Trains on stilts are still subject to flooding, even if they are completely enclosed, as their foundations may be undercut by erosion.

Just anchor to the substrate instead of the outer litho...

Wait, wait... this isn't the Culture and Earth isn't an Orbital. Too many Iian M. Banks books floating round in my head.

GDS monopoly leaves UK.gov at risk of IT cock-ups, warns report


Stop sugar coating it

"With a monopoly position and a client base compelled to turn to GDS for advice, there is a risk that they could become an inefficient organisation removed from the efficiency drivers of the market," said a report by consultancy firm BDO.

Could...? Could...!?!

I know consultancies are supposed to be subtle about these things but come on! World + dog knows this already happened.

UN: E-waste's 42 million tonnes represents 'valuable' (and ‘toxic’) urban mine


Economics 101

Sure that's a lot of valuable, potentially recoverable resources, but it's not like it's all in one nice concentrated ore deposit now is it? Spread out all over the place, the economics of recovery don't seem very favourable. If it was worth doing en masse, chances are someone would already be doing it and hoovering up as much e-waste as they could get the eco-mits on. Thus we would not be seeing this problem and the UN wouldn't be wasting their time mentioning it.

The very fact the UN has even noticed suggests it's not commercially viable to attempt recovery on any sort of scale. Therefore it seems likely that we'll continue to recycle the easily recoverable stuff like the aluminium and steel from large appliances, which is good, and continue to send giant barges full of the crap we can't be arsed with to the third world, which is bad.

Note I do not agree with dumping our crap on the rest of the planet, just saying it how it seems. I take my dead electrical/electronic stuff to the local tip for recycling. What happens from there is entirely out of my hands.

Mega fatcat Kim Dotcom in deportation drama over SPEEDING ticket


He wasn't convicted of dangerous driving, he was convicted of speeding. Those are different and separate things in law.

While I dislike the guy, I'm not sure he's done anything wrong here as the question was specifically about dangerous driving, something he was not convicted for. Nobody in their right mind says "yes" to being convicted for something they haven't been. Why should he?

This continues to look like a witch hunt, with the NZ government yet again trying to do anything they can to appease their US overlords.

Digital killed the radio star: Norway names FM switchoff date


@bill 36: Was kinda with you until...

...you started ranting about driverless and electric cars. At which point your argument went pear-shaped and you came across as a bit of a tit.

BTW DAB is neither "new" nor "good". That boat sailed some 20 years ago.

iPhone vs. Galaxy fight hospitalises two after beer bottle stabbing


To protect and serve...

< ... and one was found in the carpark of the Evergreen Apartments at 1:00 AM covered in blood. At which point the local constabulary was summoned, tossed both men in chokey ... >

Would have thought the ER would have been a better location for carpark guy, but hey what do I know?

Nothing like good honest Merican "justice".

Want to go green like Apple, but don't have billions in the bank?


Intermittent data centres

<It is possible to power your data centre partly or completely by green power without having to make a massive investment.>

Not without backup plant to run it when the wind don't blow and the sun don't shine.

<Hosting provider Memset has, for example, opened a new facility on Dunsfold Park in Surrey – a business park powered entirely by green energy, which gets on average 37 per cent of its power from the sun, delivered via the grid.>

Bollocks. Double bollocks in fact.

First, this a patently untrue statement unless they have their own "personal" grid connected only to renewable sources.

Otherwise they're just pulling power from the grid in whatever mix happens to be co-generating at any given moment. Which leads into the second "bollocks". Even if the provider billing them has dedicated connection to solar generation with a nameplate capacity totalling 37% of the power used by the business park, the business park will not be supplied by 37% solar power at any time, ever.

They are connected to the grid like everyone else. Whoever bills them has fed them some bullshit to make them believe that all of the power they use will come from "green" sources, and they swallowed it saying "please, Sir, may I have some more?"

ICANN banked $60m from dot-word auctions. Just what exactly is it going to spend it all on?


Seems like the penultimate sentence summed up exactly what has and will happen to all those millions.

You can bet the board is desperately doing everything possible to ensure that money gets in their pockets rather than lavished on the community.

The Internet of things is great until it blows up your house


Re: Life's too short to spend it balling socks.

<Bed-warming can generally be facilitated by suitable pre-cubation-deployment of human/canine/feline partners [though beware of one of the cats leaving an eviscerated mouse or the uneaten half of yesterday's Frog on the pillow].>

Brian Griffin: "That was a gift, you bastard! That was a gift for the family!"


I'd forgotten about that. Good film for its time.

You! GOOGLE! HAND OVER the special SAUCE, says Senate (of France)


Ah the French...

Seriously doubt the "average" user gives a crap about how results are ranked. Showing it to them is not going to change that. A tiny minority of users will have some interest, maybe even decide they see some kind of bias they don't like and go elsewhere.

Note that does not mean a bias actually exists. People will see what they want to see. Maybe there is a bias, maybe there isn't.

Google is where it is because they provided a tool that worked better than the competition, of which there is plenty. If the competition provides what users feel are inferior search results, well that is not Google's fault. The fact that Joe Sixpack sees Google as "the internet" is not Google's fault either.

As has been commented earlier, I cannot see how Google can be compelled to reveal their trade secrets. Attempts to do so are unlikely to succeed except in a kangaroo court, and if Google did lose - unlikely, and they would certainly appeal - expect Google.fr to disappear and French users to just go to Google.com or Google.some-other-French-speaking-domain where the French government can't touch them.

Scouts' downed Compass database won't be back 'til autumn



<In an update this week the association acknowledged that it had been "extremely difficult to carry out many Scouting tasks without a functioning database".>

Pretty sure they didn't have a database when the Scout movement started, nor for most of its history. Yet somehow Scouts were able to carry out Scouting tasks despite this lack of contemporary technology.

Their statements don't seem very "Scouty".

Bluetooth SIG launches dev studio to encourage development


Yeah but you have the choice to not buy such a product. Do your research as far as is possible and pick the best device that meets your requirements and budget.

I get what you're saying but not sure how much difference it would make, given stuff from supposed experts and big players are being found with enough holes to put a colander to shame, one clearly can't rely on those allegedly skilled in the art to get it right either.

Tricky one. I would hope the sdk has been built by those that understand such issues, and the framework has been properly designed so end users of the sdk don't have to worry about things like security, they can just get on with making stuff safe in the knowledge that the security has already been built in.

Stateside security screeners sacked for squeezing 'sexy' sacks

Black Helicopters

Re: The screeners were terminated as a result.

Nobody makes TSA look bad and gets away with it.

Oh. Wait... that means the entire TSA should self-terminate. Oh well. Guess air travel in the US just got a whole lot easier.

Ooh look a pair of ropes has just dropped in front of my window. And there's a strange noise above the hou

SPB brews up fetching beer + bacon t-shirt design

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Like it

Did I mentioned I like it? Anyone else think twenty quid is a bit steep though?

Suppose we are not talking Tesco quantities here...

Segway bought by former patent spat adversary Ninebot


I must be missing something

<This led to the codenames Fred and Ginger for the iBot and Segway respectively, because iBot was “Fred upstairs”.>

Am I the only one this sentence doesn't make sense to?

To me it reads like the iBot is codenamed "Fred", yet Segway is codenamed "Ginger" because iBot is "Fred upstairs"? Don't get it. Is iBot "Fred" or "Fred upstairs"?

EU bods Oetti and Ansip: We must digitise EVERYTHING


Again with the savings...

<According to Ansip, a “digital by default strategy” across the EU public sector could save €10bn a year and e-invoicing in public procurement could save up to €2.3bn.>

O'Really? Hey Ansip! Remind us how well that's working out the UK Gov so far?

<Market barriers must be removed, he said and “consumers could save €11.7bn per year if they could choose from a range of goods and services from across the EU’s 28 countries when they shop online.>

He does realise this is a rather impressive £23 (roughly) per EU resident? Wow. And to get achieve that life-changing saving we only have to order from the other side of the EU, from sellers who know full well the comeback on any faulty products sold will be zero, tolerate immense postage delays ranging from weeks to months. Well. Sign me up.

Jeez. I could save that much by skipping one take-away night for the family. Thanks guys for pushing these outstanding schemes to enrich us all.

Have to wonder how much these two mouthpieces stand to personally gain from a digital by default agenda. Bet following the money would reveal some interesting connections.


Re: here we go:

I was thinking the exact same thing. No business is going to waste time and money on things it has no use for. No matter how much the EU bods crow about digital awesomeness.

Suppose there's a very good chance they mean "big" business. The little guys tend to get forgotten - or deliberately ignored because it fucks up their numbers - in such plans.

Incomprehensible boffins bring quantum computers a step closer


Re: Quantum Dot

Quantum, init

Can't have an article about quantum jiggery pokery without a picture of something entirely irrelevant but still "quantumy"

Aussie priest BLESSES an APP – and the sacred iPad it runs on

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Re: If you use this App...

I see from the icon you are helping yourself. They do say God helps those who help themselves.

Suggests pickpocketing is now approved by Himself.


Re: Trails...

Bollocks. I meant "without" stops for beer. Now I can't edit it. Oh well. Self-fail.



I misread at first. Thought it said Trials. 12 of em. Like walking the path of Saint Mary with stops for beers wouldn't be trial enough.

Pre-order consumergasm will leave Apple Watches out of stock for months


1.3 watches, huh?

<"According to ereceipt data from 9,080 online shoppers, each Apple Watch buyer ordered an average of 1.3 watches," Slice revealed.>

What a stupid, pointless, meaningless metric. You can't buy 1.3 watches.

A histogram of how many people bought 1, 2, 3 etc watches would be far more meaningful.

Apple Watch: We ROUNDUP the ROUNDUPS. Yes, Roundup-squared


Re: Wristjob

@Daniel Bower...

Almost a day sounds positively painful. Burning, even.

Apple swears that NO FANBOI will queue for its new gumble


Re: PR move

Sir, I believe you've nailed it.

Bonking with Apple is no fun 'cos it's too hard to pay, say punters


@Da Weezil, Re: Representative sample?

Seems I baited the trap well.

Offend me? Definitely not. Amuse me? Absolutely.

You clearly don't fall into the "stereotypical iPhone user" category. Wonder why you're getting worked up about a random observation.


Representative sample?

Does 'a number of iPhone users in my office' count as a representative sample? You might just be in a cluster who feel the need to flash their iPhone at any and every opportunity. Wait... iPhone users... never mind.

But Aldi and Lidl??? They don't seem like the kind of stores favoured by the stereotypical iPhone flasher. Thought you lot were all M&S and Waitrose.

So where's all these digital services GDS promised us?


Re: The Agile Problem?

Yeah they seem to have fallen into the agile trap of it being all cool and edgy, without realising that they still actually have to do some work.

Pretty sure the majority of GDS don't actually understand what "agile" means, chances are they didn't even read the agile manifesto. Just heard the term being used and thought it sounded impressive. Since nobody else in Whitehall knows what "agile" means either, but must never show weakness by letting on they don't know, this sort of shit spreads like a cancer and we end up with a lot of flash and no substance.


What? Promised savings failed to materialise!?!

Say it ain't so, el Reg!! Say it ain't so.



@Loyal Commenter - Re: A baseball can do 30 megatons of damage?

Damn you beat me to the obligatory xkcd punch

Big Blue to give car insurers IoT peeking powers


Re: But

Insurers will know I'm driving safely, despite my 25 years experience, spotless driving record, clean licence and 10 years of no claims history telling them that. And then they'll still try and batter me for that time I braked too hard to avoid squashing a cat, or accelerated too hard overtaking a tractor.

No thanks.

Short circuit at Large Hadron Collider slows return to matter-mauling


Sector 3-4

This one's not Homer's fault, then.

Was the other circuit that missed the 6.5TeV rating in Sector 7-G, perchance?

Smart meters are a ‘costly mistake’ that'll add BILLIONS to bills


Smart, huh?

"Smart Energy GB responded to the IoD report, claiming the IoD "does not understand what’s needed to secure Britain’s energy infrastructure for the future."

Ok then Smart Energy GB, tell us what's needed? Wait... what? Oh. Smart meters. Yeah. They will secure Britain's energy infrastructure.

Silly me. For the briefest instant I thought maybe they were talking about building more nuclear power stations. What was I thinking?

PayPal settles over WMD sanction-breaking transaction claims

Black Helicopters

That much huh?

Seven grand... somehow doesn't seem a lot for a supposed WMD proliferator.

Hardly worth getting Jack Bauer out of bed for.

NASA: We're gonna rip up an ASTEROID and make it ORBIT the MOON


Re: Just put up a big sign

How about the UK gov creates an ineffectual regulator to give the other space rocks a thorough gumming each time one of them gets too close or dares to impact our atmosphere.

I propose we call it Office for Diverting Space-rocks - OFDIVS.

Sorry. I'll get my space-suit ---->

Samsung forgets fingerprints, focuses its eye on YOURS


Re: 1000x more secure my ass

Perhaps it's a 3d image or each eye, or at least stereoscopic. I looked on their site but it was unsurprisingly light on detail.

With 3d images the system could perhaps detect the curvature of the eyeballs, making it harder to fake. Or perhaps the imaging system is looking for details or features that would be difficult to print, say things only visible in IR.

Totally agree with earlier sentiments that biometrics should only serve as a user ID. Never a password.

Confirm identity, not clearance.

Ford: Our latest car gizmo will CHOKE OFF your FUEL if you're speeding


If the gov was really bothered about speeders

they'd have mandated something like this on all new cars sold in the UK. And mandated it is always on when driving public roads, except for situations like overtaking.

I've been thinking this for some years now. The fact the techonology has been feasible for several years now and is starting to go mainstream, yet is not mandated, suggests the government is not really as bothered about speeding as they say.

If speeding is such a terrible scourge on society, surely gov should be taking active steps to stop drivers speeding. The technology exists. They could mandate its use and gradually cuts down the number of drivers that can break the speed limit. But instead, they choose to keep the revenue stream from speeding fines.

I am not in favour of this, btw. Just suggesting the government is being duplicitous in complaining too many people speed yet not forcing the use of technologies that can actively prevent it.

Likewise they could take steps to prevent uninsured driving, drunk driving - far greater dangers to other road users than someone going 5mph over the limit - with what nowadays is cheap and simple hardware. They choose not to.


Ransomware holds schools hostage: 'Now give us Bitcoin worth $129k, er, $124k, wait ...'


Re: Another nail in the BC coffin?

Why bother? They aren't paying the ransom so there'd be nothing to trace. Are you suggesting they should pay up regardless, even though they've cleaned and recovered their systems?

Blockhead fugitive Snapchats himself into police custody


Great police training in Maine, then

Sounds very much like they just stuck their head round the kitchen door the first time. "Nope nobody in here, move on to the next room."

Kinda expect crims to do stupid things. Expect cops, certainly US cops, to properly clear a room so they don't find themselves shot in the back of the head.

Hated biz smart meter rollout: UK.gov sticks chin out, shuts eyes


"The report by the Energy and Climate Change Committee said it does "not believe" plans to install 53 million devices in homes and businesses by 2020 will be achieved."

Did this august body indicate why they think this might not be achieved? Consumer resistance coupled with the knowledge these things are of fuck all use, perhaps?

No, no. Can't be that. Must be that we "just don't get it" yet.

That's a big 4Ker of a cosmos: 3D planetarium to open in Bristol


Re: 100 seats?

Agreed. Maybe the view is most immersive sat half way up the wall or dangling from the top of the dome.



Hmm wait... damn. "Software Defined Programmable City" ain't on my bullshit-bingo card.

Assange™ lawyers demand Swedish prosecution files or no London interview


If I were going to fucking parties for 4 years I'd be pretty smug too, Ferrero Rocher or not. Smug and sore.

Dell denies 'insecure autoupdate app' flings open PC backdoor

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Re: IIRC it's a browser plugin.

Yeah it is on my Dell. Can't speak for other Dell's but having recently reinstalled the OS I can say it wasn't preinstalled.


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