I'm just looking forward to the Best. Screensaver. Ever.
862 posts • joined 12 Dec 2014
I'm just looking forward to the Best. Screensaver. Ever.
When they do need to test for real, they should ask the nice people at Cern to send the satellites around the LHC in opposite directions at near light speed.
"We had a contractor at one of our sites last year"
In the UK at least, jobbing contractors are typically only on a week's notice and have minimal rights compared to their PAYE cousins.
Gross misconduct, or any whiff of a scandal, and they are often simply shown the door - no explanation necessary. Everyone knows why they've gone, but nothing is officially recorded.
"both would be disconnected if just one was pulled"
Only if both power cables had an identical length of cable betwixt the entanglement and the sockets.
If not, the one with the least slack would pop first.
"using the Deleted folder as an archive"
I've seen a contractor fired for "helpfully" emptying a user's Deleted Items without asking first.
Any sympathy I had for the guy was quickly quashed when I heard that, to avoid any blame, he'd told the upset user that he was me before leaving site. Twat.
or maybe EastEnders...
"I'm surprised that it took this long"
Quite. IIRC something very similar was achieved in the world of regular books a few years back - reducing a given author's style to a digital fingerprint. A useful tool for proving the provenance of disputed authorship.
I see no real difference here.
"the law had not kept pace with his client’s ideas""
On what planet could that be a valid defense?
Prisons are full of people who think the law shouldn't apply to them either.
I just recited the Clown/Ring-Master's "Roll up, roll up" intro to myself. Verbatim.
It's still stored away up there, unlike much of the French, Shakespeare, etc that I was actually trying to memorise at the time...
I had the whole unit sat on a metal sheet with the ram pack wedged tight with a piece of garden hose. It acted as a massive heat-sink and cured the wobble - Worked a treat. The design was from one of the many magazines - can't remember which one though.
And if you needed to copy games:
RAND USR 836
What kind of bees give milk?
El-Reg uses https:!
Holy crap - when did that happen?
Why am I picturing this "culturally sensitive remake" as starring Hammond, May & Clarkson?
Slightly off-topic, but have you noticed in local news stories about really unlucky people who manage to suffer bizarre & unlikely combinations of being impaled/burned/blown up/run over etc, that they always say the same thing from their hospital beds?
"I'm the luckiest man alive."
I'm a sprout fan too, but don't ever be tempted to make a sprout omelette.
It tasted fucking awful.
A real Frenchman would have taunted it.
"Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person!". Etc.
So how are you supposed to get funding to develop a prototype if you can't publish until after you've already got one?
I've already made a prototype. Only double the size (2*2*2), but also with eight times the capacity.
Now where's my money?
The most potent drugs I ever got from my grandparents were mint imperials. <sigh>
BTW - If you need to quickly reduce the heat of a scorching machine room armed with nothing more than natural ventilation and all the desk fans you can lay your hands on, you get much quicker results if you set everything up to blow all the hot air out, rather than by trying to force lots of lovely cold air in.
I learned this the hard way, so you don't have to.
If the string isn't actually required, then shirley this would work over a stream of piss.
The duration of the connection would only be limited by bladder capacity, and/or how long you could endure having a crocodile clip attached to your unmentionables. The quality of your aim might also be a factor.
This could be the next YouTube challenge...
That name wouldn't be out of place in an episode of The Mighty Boosh.
...any bird from the genus Bugeranus tickles my fancy.
I've hung mine up indoors.
Right next to my crystal meth advent calendar.
I try to cover myself against the typical scams, but still got caught out last year when I was billed me an extra 40 Euro on top of the quoted price because the car they issued me with was a diesel.
Apparently the helpful rental desk employee pointed this out to me in advance, and definitely offered me the chance to not throw money at them for no discernable benefit if I so wished. Anyway, I signed their contract, which clearly spelled out those particular terms, in Spanish, and No Further Correspondence Will Be Entered Into.
Screw you, Goldcar.
The major flaw with the UK study is that they forgot to defrost the drone first...
Kneel before our Wotsits, Colonies!
...or "Hordes of the Things".
Radio show or the game. Not bothered.
It'll still be better than watching Aragorn, Sauron & the rest all in the same year at high-school, having weekly adventures whilst struggling with homework & parental issues.
"...all in a big pile"
I misread that as "all in a big pie".
Worth a try, I reckon.
"Hey, Randy. What's handy?"
Agreed - A lot of apocryphal stories have a grounding in truth. "shared experiences" is a pretty good label for many of them.
I have personally dealt with a user who genuinely couldn't find the "any" key, seen multiplugs plugged into themselves, and removed all manner of foreign objects from assorted hardware. All true, even though you've heard them all before.
(Although I've never had to deal with the fabled "cup holder"...)
"A roll? A roll of Durex? I'd like to see his Christmas presents..."
A clearly-defined keyboard imprint in your forehead is not an easy look to carry off at work.
"...easily confused relatives"
Unfortunately, any & every mobile can be confusing for some. No matter how simple the interface, it's still a mobile phone, and therefore something to be feared.
Residents of care homes can sometimes find themselves cut-off from the outside world if they have no landline and yet are unable to use a mobile (smartphone or dumb).
A brilliant recent "invention" was a phone that looks and behaves exactly like an old tethered phone - one that in days gone by would have sat on a table in the hall or at the bottom of the stairs.
This baby contains a SIM instead of being wired to the phone network, but is instantly familiar to the older generation. Genius.
Sorry, they really have been known as "jazz mags" (in Blighty at least) for some time now.
I think I first came across <cough!> the term in Viz in the early nineties - e.g. typical headline: "We've found Hitler's horny Jazz Mags", etc.
The header [sorry] pic to this article is a 2D representation of a 3D model of a 2D photo of a 3D head.
"trying to photocopy things onto acetates since the printer couldn't print them"
IIRC you could get laser-printer-grade acetate sheets. The other kind would - and frequently did - melt inside the printer.
Can a cat be poured into two separate containers at the same time?
I have a dim memory of a short story where, after "The Big One", instead of everything to the West of the San Andreas fault collapsing in to the sea, everything to the East did instead...
'developers who test on the latest [...] cause devices to become "old" much quicker than they actually are'
That's pretty much the last five decades' of computing summed up right there. Probably even longer, but I don't remember before that.
Not-so-fond memories of shoehorning MSDOS & Windows onto my boss's Thinkpad, with only an OS2 (Warp?) driver disk and no internet to speak of.
I think I'll give this particular bit of nostalgia a miss, thanks.
We have enhanced our privacy notice, increased app security, provided customers [with] more choice in the data they share, and we continue to work with leading privacy and security experts to enhance the app.
Umm - That doesn't sound to me like they have they actually stopped collecting the data. Just that they've done the minimum possible to "notify" the user (provided they know where to look) and given them the chance to opt-out somehow.
"then I'm better off watching Lesbian Vampire Killers"
Think carefully before going down that road. There's no turning back once you do.
Slight tangent here - but did anyone in Scotland, ever, say the word "Jings!!" apart from in The Beano & The Dandy?
If she was your "typical" naturist, the pellet probably just got wedged into one of the many creases and wrinkles.
@Roj: Nah - you've got all mixed up. It's all about the right to sport a ridiculous hillbiilly suntan, Shirley?
and this is presumably produced by the onion as a natural defense mechanism
Or, just maybe, our eye-watering discomfort is a defense mechanism of our own. From way back when vicious onions roamed in packs, and our caveman ancestors learned the hard way not to mess with them.
It's been a while since I read The Cuckoo's Egg. It's about time I dug it out again...
"Have you had to perform sysadminnery in front of an ... erm ... appreciative audience?"
Not me - but in the early ninties an ex-colleague of mine was once the IT-guy on one of the City trading floors.
You can only imagine the amount of abuse he used to get from the self-obsessed, money-driven wankers every time he had to enter their demesne to replace their broken kit. And like all spoilt, tantrum-prone children, they used to break a lot of kit...
Sorry - Not quite.
An oxymoron is actually a name, or maybe title, that seems to contradict the thing it is naming.
The most overused example is probably "Military Intelligence". But there are many others to choose from - e.g. Great Yarmouth.
There are some famous cases where we get confused, of course.
Hopefully bees can give us a definitive answer to the question of our time: Just what colour was that dress?
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