* Posts by Dwarf

822 posts • joined 11 Dec 2014

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It's US Tax Day, so of course the IRS's servers have taken a swan dive

Dwarf
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If only

If only we could come up with a way of increasing capacity before or during times when more people may want / need to use the service.

We could coin an expression - perhaps elasticity.

It may even be possible to get someone else to provide that compute on demand as you use it, so you don't need to have lots of kit lying around doing nothing for the rest of the year.

I wonder if they have heard of cloud or AWS ??

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Former DXC UK chief Wilson lands at Micro Focus

Dwarf
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Obviously they must feel at home in that situation.

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European Space Agency squirts a code update at Mars Express orbiter

Dwarf
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Re: Quality Control

Fully agree, Microsoft don't test anything, they rely on the users to be their beta testers.

As they are doing an upgrade, I wonder if anyone has considered other features ?

They already have telemetry, but I wonder if they will add a pointless app store and enforce the use of a second rate browser and a gaming console for not apparent reason too.

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Ariane 5 primed for second launch of year after trajectory cockup

Dwarf
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Re: Reusable?

Not at all, bringing your transport back to where you started is very common, it happens on most cars, bikes, planes. Why should rockets be any different ?

Additionally, less junk left flying around in space for the next mission to crash into.

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Shhh! Don’t tell KillBots the UN’s about to debate which ones to ban

Dwarf
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ssh root@terminator

kill -9 1

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Shaking up the Nad Men: Microsoft splits up into 'cloud' and 'edge'

Dwarf
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How to further alienate your customers

So with a choice of Client, Cloud and AI, where is all the traditional on-premise portfolio ?

Are you moving out of this market or are you saying that its all got to private cloud, which could be massive over complication for many businesses.

Many customers don't want or cant use your cloud or anyone else's. If you are closing that door, then watch the customers flee in droves to alternatives.

If your road map doesn't include your customers requirements, then don't be surprised if your customers road maps doesn't include Microsoft.

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UK smut overlord declares age checks should protect users' privates

Dwarf
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Double standards

The same government mandates sex education in schools at a younger and younger ages with all sorts of groups trying to push their agenda on what they think is normal.

Yet as parents its not the sort of thing that you can go into much detail about without falling foul of the thought police about the moral rights and wrongs and potentially even child protection, so we have to give them some fairly generic guidance at the appropriate times, for example buying them a box of condoms at 16 for example when they probably wouldn't want to go into a shop and get their own, or talking about "more normal" activities and eluding to some of the less normal activities, then leave it for them to find out about it on their own, since they will develop their own preferences like we all have.

If they decide that the Internet is the place to learn - since this is also what is drilled into them through school and college, then its hardly surprising that they will stumble onto such sites. Finding about some of the edgier topics and realising this is not as common or just making a decision "I don't want to do that" is a lot easier there than when they get into a bad situation when they are out on their own and the other person says this is absolutely normal, and afterwards they have nobody to talk to about it.

The harder access is made for 16-18 year old's, the more that people will be there to exploit them, which is exactly what we don't want to happen.

But then again - Governments and joined up thinking rarely goes hand in hand.

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NASA fungus problem puts theory of 'Martian mushrooms' on toast

Dwarf
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They came from outer space

This research is hardly going to result in a new set of space films - attack of the 40 foot mushrooms and the like, but you have to wonder what happens if you add a little water to mars - would you get a food source or is it that this is just ordinary mushrooms from earth that have snuck into the labs and in which case, what else has snuck out ?

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Corking story: Idiotic smart wine bottle idea falls over, passes out

Dwarf
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Cartridges

I buy my wine and beer in cartridges. In the layman's vernacular, we call these "bottles"

They even have small scrolls of dead tree stuck to the front with strange hieroglyphs that describe the contents. Best of all, they work in power cuts and need nothing more than an opener and piece of blown glass to allow you to consume them.

Seriously - why add technology to something that doesn't benefit from it in any way. Idiots !

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Hip hop-eration: Hopless Franken-beer will bring you hoppiness

Dwarf
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Pint

Don't care

You can keep it, I'll stick to the real thing.

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UK's London Gatwick Airport boasts of driverless vehicle trial

Dwarf
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The mind boggles

Putting a higher risk (ie relatively untested) autonomous system into a high risk environment. What could possibly go wrong ?

I wonder if the software is designed to consider things not on the same plane (horizontal plane, not thing with wings). Yes, planes have autopilots, but I bet they go through a heck of a lot more testing and far more rigorous testing than a constantly in development autonomous car

How would they interact with the guys on the ground with their semaphores and with the fire service in emergency cases ??

Perhaps its time to maintain a list of airports to avoid.

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FYI: AI tools can unmask anonymous coders from their binary executables

Dwarf
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Re: Teamwork, compilers and statistics

It would be ironic if you couldn't spot the irony in the previous statement.

Of course its made up on the spot, that was the whole point.

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Dwarf
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Teamwork, compilers and statistics

So what happens when a team works on an app or it moves from programmer to programmer as teams change and code still needs to be maintained over multiple years.

Similarly, what happens as the compilers and linkers evolve - what does the supposed optimisation voodoo do to the code.

Looks like pure statistics to me and as we all know, you can prove anything with statistics. Last I heard, 76.45% of statistics were made up on the spot.

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Windows 10 to force you to use Edge, even if it isn't default browser

Dwarf
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Its not forcing me to do anything

Because I don't do Windows, got bored of playing their game a couple of years ago. I opened the windows, looked outside and realised its easier on the other side.

When are MS going to realise that they don't know best.

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Maplin shutdown sale prices still HIGHER than rivals

Dwarf
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One last trip down memory lane

Went in to take a wander around and see what deals they had. Quickly got that feeling of what a waste of time and walked out again.

Then I remembered why I stopped shopping there in the first place.

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Openreach hiring thousands more engineers

Dwarf
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Efficiency

The could get the "engineers" to work more efficiently by having them spend time fixing line faults, rather than clocking up miles in their vans. Most that I've spoken to over recent years have been on the road more than they've had their head in equipment cabinets and none of them have any local knowledge any more, you often have to tell them where the pits and boxes are.

I agree with @Mark C 2 re the Tech vs Engineer view.

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Poop to save planet as boffins devise bullsh*t way of extracting gas

Dwarf
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Yet another plan that is based on nothing but hot air

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Windows Mixed Reality: Windows Mobile deja vu?

Dwarf
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Yet another MS failure

The claim is that if you put an infinite number of monkeys in front of keyboards, they will produce the works of Shakespeare.

Microsoft seems to be proving that this theory is incorrect.

I'm so glad I'm out of this market, its nice to watch with popcorn from the sidelines.

Like many others, I used to very pro MS, until it just became far too painful to be in the proximity of their products due to the stupid strategy of the day that seems to never learn.

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UK digi minister Hancock suggests Facebook and pals give your kids a time-out

Dwarf
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Re: "No details were given on how the scheme would work"

To be fair he's just giving user requirements.

A users requirements vs validated user requirements are very different.

Can we have the login box in 36 point curly text with that 'ants' walking line around the outside of it, since it will look different.

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Oculus Rift whiffed, VR fanbois miffed

Dwarf
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Remind me why a local device needs to connect to a remote service before it can boot up ?

This reminds me why I'l never buy one, particularly if the manufacturer can't even manage certificate renewal, its not difficult !

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UK takes first step towards criminalising driverless car hackers

Dwarf
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So whats the point ???

If you are not in control, but are accountable for the accuracy of someone else's code - in all conditions it may encounter, then why would you give up the ability to control your own destiny ?

Does this also mean that you can't have a drink whilst the car drives for similar reasons ?

If they take away the direct user interface, then what is the user supposed to do if something is going wrong and you realise - hit the big red reset button on the dashboard that inflates the interior and exterior airbags ?

This is bonkers and shows why the technology is not ready for mainstream.

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News lobsters demand to be let back into the Facebook boiling pot

Dwarf
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Do people actually fall for these obvious scams and click the links ?

If it sounds bonkers, then it probably is.

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Britain ignores booze guidelines – heads for the pub

Dwarf
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Nanny State

The people say Meh,

Statistics are all very nice, but a +1% chance of X happening due to Y is just a risk and we all take risks each day - crossing the road, getting on a plane, eating that dodgy looking kebab.

We've got to have something to look forwards to, whatever it is - going to the Cinema, buying that nice flash car, or just going out for a beer with your mates. If you take away the fun, then whats the point in it all ?

Then we have to think, are the stats right, was the research done properly, is there an error somewhere in the data or maths that affects the results and results in new research next year that says exactly the opposite of the previous research.

I might start listening more to Doctors / scientists more when they can avoid dying off. Until then, its a case of make your choices and live and die by those decisions - its your life, not theirs.

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RIP... almost: Brit high street gadget shack Maplin Electronics

Dwarf
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Always optimistic

According to their web site they are still giving away their money off vouchers for orders over £10

I'm sure they will be useful in the coming weeks :-)

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Full shift to electric vans would melt Royal Mail's London hub, MPs told

Dwarf
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Upselling with language

Royal Mail contemplated switching all its petrol guzzlers to an available electric alternative.

Amazing how a bit of glossing over things makes all the difference.

The vehicles will still consume their fuel, however they are powered, so they will guzzle electricity in a similar manner to any other fuel and of course petrol and diesel is "Available" too, so you could easily write

"Royal Mail contemplated switching all its electricity guzzlers to an available alternative.", where Petrol or Diesel is clearly available at any forecourt.

Its nice to see that the cost of generating the fuel and getting it to its destination is missed off.

I don't expect electric cars to be accessible to the vast majority until little things like how they will be used for those who live in communal areas will be resolved. How for example would you go about getting an electric station outside your house / flat etc and not stop someone else parking there - given that parking space is already a premium in the majority of housing developments. Imagine the new set of interesting arguments between neighbours that it could create when someone else buys an electric car and there is more contention for their use overnight

How will street after street of cars be powered without having cables all over the pavements and into the roads causing a bunch of different problems. Given the issues around battery safety, then how many cars will have problems with their battery packs and burn up - taking an endless succession of similarly fuelled cars along the street with them ??

What creative methods will the local yoof come up with to stop cars charging or making them spark.

Given that people drive away with filling station pipes still connected and they only fill up infrequently, how many more cars will be driving around with wires hanging off of them and what will that do to the charge point or the car in terms of short circuits or similar ??

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Virgin Media's Brit biz broadband goes TITSUP: Total Inability To Support Upset People

Dwarf
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Resilience

"Our business is internet based and thus the outage has cost us thousands. This is the worst service I have ever encountered. Anyone thinking of moving to Virgin Media, stay away."

Business grade resilience isn’t provided by hosting at home, if it’s important, then put it in a data centre and build it with resilience, it’s not expensive, particularly when you factor in the cost of outages on the business.

Don’t whine when your home grade Internet link goes down - just remember how much you are paying for it and possibly get a 4G MiFi adapter or second link for backup

</rant>

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Is this why Facebook is such a toxic dump? HP, HPE sued for 'leaking chems' into office site

Dwarf
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I wonder

Where did they bury what they dug up ?

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The e-waste warrior, 28,000 copied Windows restore discs, and a fight to stay out of jail

Dwarf
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The real issue

Is probably that someone in MS equates this to new PC sales if the machines weren’t recycled.

Saving the planet and realising that many just ignore Windows and PC’s is mere noise to those who just want your money at any cost.

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Flight Simulator's DRM fighter nosedives into Chrome's cache

Dwarf
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Blunt weapon

Of course the fact that they sniffed passwords from innocent people's PC's too is fine, sure they won't mind at all - because <insert bad phrase>

Its malware however you look at it. Trust is built up slowly but lost in an instant.

Does this affect those who play flight sim through Steam too ?

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Waddawewant? Free video codecs! When do we... oh, look, the last MPEG-2 patent expired!

Dwarf
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I wonder

Will the RPI foundation now allow free issue of codecs onto all their devices ?

Or better still, just drop it into the next kernel update with it already enabled en-mass ?

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Bloke sues Microsoft: Give me $600m – or my copy of Windows 7 back

Dwarf
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Seems fair

After all, I expect the case will take a decade, so only 60m per year

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Stop calling, stop calling... ICO goes gaga after home improvement biz ignores warnings

Dwarf
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Bigger teeth

This is all meaningless until it hurts the companies and individuals who ignore the laws - otherwise the are simply laughing all the way to the bank.

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Roses are red, Windows error screens are blue. It's 2018, and an email can still pwn you

Dwarf
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Reading this forum brings flashbacks of old text based adventure games.

It only follows that my response be that security isn’t xyzzy.

Come on Microsoft, hire some decent developers and perhaps consider putting a QA / Test department into your company, then we won’t laugh at you as much.

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Still not on Windows 10? Fine, sighs Microsoft, here are its antivirus tools for Windows 7, 8.1

Dwarf
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Marketing vs reality again

"We hear from our customers security is one of the biggest motivators for their move to Windows 10,"

You are partly right - up to the point of mentioning Windows 10, with all the slurping of our data we have no security, which is why acceptance of the software is low. Those that care about security refuse to use it.

Time to read the dictionary again and work out the difference between the words "mine" and "yours"

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Facebook gets Weed-whacked: Unilever exec may axe ads over social network's toxic posts

Dwarf
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Advertise more on social media !!

Seriously - keep it up, put all your budget into that. All the time you are advertising on social media sites, then that's less chance that I'll see the adverts elsewhere *

* Notwithstanding the ad blocker on all machines I use and neural response that causes an immediate close on things like YouTube if it interrupts me with a pointless advert. I'm quite able to go shopping without having seen a single advert.

The irony is that the more the companies advertise, the higher the cost of the items are that we buy, since all those sunk costs are hidden in the price we pay. I'd prefer the alternative - don't advertise and let me buy the product that are best at the cheaper prices, where "best" is determined by real reputation, not how much you can splash on trying to annoy me with adverts.

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Brit regulator pats self on back over nuisance call reduction: It's just 4 billion now!

Dwarf
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Re: The landline is now a liability

<pedant>

Blocking VoIP is easy - just block the SIP ports at your firewall

</pedant>

If you really mean that you want to reject calls originating from SIP providers into the PSTN, then that's something else. Have you looked at BT Call Protect, its their nuisance call filtering service.

The other alternative thats not simple to set up but is a lot of fun involves :

1. A Raspberry Pi with RaspPBX (Asterisk) on it to act as the PABX

2. An FXO (phone) interface to receive phone calls to a PABX

3. An FXS (PABX) interface so you can plug in a phone to receive the cleaned calls

4. Lenny to talk to the caller.

5. Some config in Asterisk to decide what caller ID's / types go where.

The other option to Lenny is the awful Abyss music on hold

Now you can have lots of fun with them instead.

Alternately, don't bother answering the phone and let voicemail cope with them, there are plenty of options here.

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Apple's top-secret iBoot firmware source code spills onto GitHub for some insane reason

Dwarf
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Re: Yeah

Fiat isn't Japanese !!

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Lenovo literally has a screw loose – so it's recalled flagship Carbon X1 ThinkPads

Dwarf
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Joke

That's a serious screw-up. Someone should get fired.

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No Windows 10, no Office 2019, says Microsoft

Dwarf
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Re: What's a

An 8 bit machine and you try and poke 64K. Most only had a total address space of 64K, hence some was RAM and some ROM. There's no point trying to poke a ROM.

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1,900 rotten apps bounced out of Google Play every day in 2017

Dwarf
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Crapstore not AppStore.

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Firefox to emit ‘occasional sponsored story’ in ads test

Dwarf
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Re: Recommended by Pocket

But you shouldn't need to disable it, it should not be there in the first place

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Dwarf
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FAIL

Can’t wait

I’ve got so much spare time, I just love watching all those slow and pointless adverts for things I’m not interested in - ever.

Seioulsly. No. Don’t even think about it. Uninstalls are easy.

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Crypto-jackers slip Coinhive mining code into YouTube site ads

Dwarf
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And they wonder why we hate adverts...

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Microsoft whips out tool so you can measure Windows 10's data-slurping creepiness

Dwarf
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Effort

Must have taken a lot more effort to produce the app than it would to just give an off button that does what it says

We still don’t trust you and therefore won’t use the product.

My data is mine, not yours.

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Electronic voting box makers want kit stripped from eBay – and out of hackers' hands

Dwarf
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Trust

The manufacturers should be giving the away to hackers to demonstrate that they are secure and that we can trust them, anything else is security by obscurity, which is well known to be a false sense of security.

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Apple: The exclusive sales channel for an, er, AI toothbrush

Dwarf
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I despair

Having to worry about your toothbrush's compatibility with your mobile phone / tablet - what a time to be alive

Any guesses how long it will be before it needs a firmware update to fix a security flaw, or we find out that its telemetry has been spying on us and saying when the best time to stuff adverts in our faces.

I'm wondering how well the user interface will work - the screen will presumably be wobbly given that there is a toothbrush connected to your skull and its vibrating away like mad.

Does it also add the term "you're brushing it wrong" to the Apple list of reasons things don't work ?

First world problems that we can do without.

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Former Cisco CEO John Chambers says insects are the new lobsters

Dwarf
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Nothing too see here

Sales dude tries to convince us his latest idea is great and we need to jump,on board, of course the fact that he will profit has absolutely nothing to do with it.

Thanks, but I’ll stick to the proper foods. Can’t see that anything other than deep fried would be good, which rather limits the menu opportunities. Soggy cricket madras anyone ?

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Another round of click-fraud extensions pulled from Chrome Store

Dwarf
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Store benefits

Wasn’t one of the supposed benefits of these vendor provided stores that they only contained legitimate apps ?

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DXC execs: Here's ANOTHER deadline for skills profiling

Dwarf
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x=dx/dt

Just differentiate yourself, its mostly in the company name after all

I'm sure that it won't matter what people put into the database, the outcome looks like it will be the same.

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Microsoft wants to patent mind control

Dwarf
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Crazy

So, they can't make an ordinary microphone that's worked properly before Windows 10 be compatible with Windows 10, but they expect to be able to do mind control - something that has proven significantly more difficult over a far longer period of time.

How do they plan to segregate out things like the mind wandering when people are working, or that context switch when the hottie from the office walks down the corridor and you stop thinking about work and wish you were a few years younger again..

The only positive thing is that with all that telemetry, they will be able to see first hand how much people hate Windows 10 and the Ribbon.

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