* Posts by }{amis}{

324 posts • joined 27 Nov 2014

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Campaigners get go-ahead to challenge exemption UK gave itself over immigrants' data

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Joke

Re: A Government that wants carte blanche with personal information

politician [pol-i-tish-uh n]

noun

a person who is active in party politics.

a person who holds a political office.

a power hungry moron.

a incompetent oxygen thief.

a asshole who should have been drowned at birth.

Having AI assistants ruling our future lives? That's so sad. Alexa play Despacito

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Black Helicopters

F@$% the creapy stalker tech

I won't have any of these "AI Products" reasons being:

1: It's just another thing to break and make stuff harder to repair.

2: Its yet more IOT $%&t you will be lucky if it gets even gets 1 patch leave out a decade's worth that a lot of white goods will need.

3: It's a microphone in your home controlled by the creepiest companies in existence.

These are enough reasons for me to avoid this stuff like a plague.

Brit comms regulator Ofcom: Disabled left behind by tech

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Coat

Re: Vision Impared

The scaling code improved massively under windows 8 these days the only stuff that I run into that doesn't scale well is generally old Java stuff.

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FAIL

Vision Impared

My cousin is legally blind with about 20% vision in one eye as such smartphones are almost totally useless to her as the largest phone sizes are far too small.

so for web browsing, she is stuck with a desktop and 23" monitor set to 250% font scaling, it's one area where Microsoft seems to be well ahead of the pack.

The problem boils down to money as it always has, disability access is hard to do and represents a small unprofitable user group, much as I am generally in the free-trade business corner it is one area that effective and enforced legislation is a must.

Army had 'naive' approach to Capita's £1.3bn recruiting IT contract, MPs told

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Flame

S.N.A.F.U.

So no surprises here Crapata strikes again and the military brass lives down to their reputation of having no idea what money is or how to spend it responsibly.

xHamster reports spike in UK users getting their five-knuckle shuffle on before pr0n age checks

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Trollface

They won't apply to sites on which porn makes up a third or less of the content

Amusingly despite being well renowned as one of the internets gutters, 4Chan would not seem to qualify as a smut site, given only about a 1/4 of the groups are NSFW leave out porn.

Linus Torvalds opts for the scream test: Linux kernel syscall tweaked to shut data-leak hole – anyone upset, yell now

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Meh

Re: The Scream Test

Meh as with any scream test the results only seem to count if the screamer is far enough up the greasy pole to be heard......

Boffins don't give a sh!t, slap Trump's face on a turd in science journal

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Go

LOL

That's the closest that trumps ever been to something intelligent!

Thanks to UK peers, coming to a laptop near you in 2019: Age checks for online smut

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Big Brother

Re: VPL, erm, I mean VPN

I use Proton VPN though I don't have the technical experience to validate how good their security is its run by the same people who manage Proton mail which has a well-earned reputation for privacy and security.

}{amis}{ Silver badge
FAIL

Doh....

Time to invest in VPN companies then as their user base is about to get ~60m new users.

If the VPN use does explode in the UK I wonder how much that's going to screw up GCHQ's work.

Ticketmaster tells customer it's not at fault for site's Magecart malware pwnage

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Happy

Re: Offsite scripts GAH!

I would like to offer you this video as a comment.

Thank you very much for that I haven't seen that one before and it made me smile.

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Stop

Re: Offsite scripts GAH!

Your law #1 does that apply to microcode inside your CPU too? Damn shame that is hidden from you to do your own audit eh?

You are right that it is impossible to audit everything but when you are not even attempting to defend against proven attack vectors you have failed at security.

Having script's that load untrusted 3rd party code on secure pages is at this point the equivalent of leaving the keys in the front door and wondering why you lost all of your stuff.

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Happy

Re: Offsite scripts GAH!

Thank you

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Meh

Re: Offsite scripts GAH!

I'm not understanding how that matters. If the script links in external references the script can be benign when tested but not necessarily in the future.

If the script has any ability to load remote code in after deployment it fails the can I put this in a secure area test.

If you want analytics of your payment tunnel, use an after the event log analysis tool.

There are plenty that can have this data uploaded to the cloud to give the morons managment pretty graphs that they won't understand to look at.

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Unhappy

Re: Offsite scripts GAH!

I don't like making excuses for myself but dyslexia sucks and tools like Grammarly can only do so much!

It's really depressing when you get spelling and grammar corrections from a coworker to whom English is his 3rd language!

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Flame

Offsite scripts GAH!

I've lost track of the number of times I've had to bash heads together over this kind of thing.

Its usually some sales or marketing drone think that adding a <Insert retarded social network here> link to the website will magically add a tone of traffic.

This tends to result in emails like this :

F.F.S. people if its an even vaguely secure area no script that you have not copied locally and validated does what you think it does goes in, is this so hard to understand.

LG's beer-making bot singlehandedly sucks all fun, boffinry from home brewing

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Mushroom

Re: Beer in the Sodastream?

I've not tried milkshake but one drunken night a bottle of wine was tried, the ceiling of that flat still had pink spots after 2 coats of paint!

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Alert

Does it despense vast amounts of bog rool??

Because if its anything like any of my homebrewing disasters efforts you need will need it to clean up the seemingly inevitable tsunami of arse gravy.

App-happy SAP Santa offers partners free access to Cloud Platform

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Big Brother

Like any good dealer......

Hear son the first hit is always free.......

And then it's only £250 a line........................................

Galileo's magnifico measurement: 1976 redshift test updated

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Happy

When life give's you lemons....

Make lemonade.

Epic work from the ESA's scientists.

BOFH: State of a job, eh? Roll the Endless Requests for Further Information protocol

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Trollface

Does BOFH work for Crapita now?

Nah the BOFH occasionally achieves something as a side benefit whereas Capata only turns gold into $%!t

UK spies: You know how we said bulk device hacking would be used sparingly? Well, things have 'evolved'...

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Trollface

(Aside from everyone who isn't actually living on Rockall).

I'm told that there is a thriving population of amoeba on Rockall and am almost certain that they have a better grasp of the situation than people like miss hashtags.

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Big Brother

Admirable transparency by @GCHQ ??????

Call me a cynic but my first taught at seeing that was that they have been caught with their pants down somehow, and now want to spin the message before the $%!t hits the fan.

Microsoft: New icons, new drivers, AI! Everything is awesome!

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Trollface

Or a small electric jolt via the clicker.

Only a small one?? in my experience people like that won't notice their idiocy unless they are twitching and smoking like a cartoon villain!

European fibre lobby calls for end to fake fibre broadband ads

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FAIL

BS!!

The Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) has permitted broadband companies to advertise "hybrid" broadband – which means it "may contain fibre" – as true "fibre broadband".

Errr, correct me if i am wrong but doesn't that mean that by the ASA's reasoning any internet connection is "Fibre" as all backhaul is handled by fibre connections???

See this, Google? Microsoft happy to take a half-billion in sweet, sweet US military money to 'increase lethality'

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Black Helicopters

Re: Eh?

The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other b£$&%*d die for his.

George S. Patton

What a meth: Woman held for 3 months after cops mistake candy floss for hard drugs

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Holmes

Why so long??

Given that most hospitals have a lab on speed dial that can identify pretty much any suspicious substance in a matter of minutes, why did it take 3 months to run the test.

Even if you assume that 1 of those months was just wasted on bureaucratic nonsense that still leaves 2 months A.W.O.L.

Lush scrubs its card-processing servers squeaky clean

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Joke

what's soap?

Its the stuff you knick from your mum to get the grips to go onto the motorbike!

Australia's 'snoop minister' wants crypto-busting law probe wound up, proposals back into parliament

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Big Brother

F@~*&g Morons

Given that its possible to print the open source code of a robust encryption algorithm on a T-shirt I fail to see how this kind of thing can ever work the USA lost this argument in the 90s Wiki : Crypt Wars...

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

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Big Brother

Re: "That'll be the Government - they always do things out in the open."

Tell that to the C.I.A. ect.......

Visual Studio 2017 15.9 is here! Fire up your Windows on Arm laptops. All four of you

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Stop

GAH!!

an hour into the install and still waiting on an I7 with an m.2 and 16gb ram why so slow!

Sorry, but NASA says Mars signal wasn't Opportunity knocking

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Devil

RE: Here at Vulture West we're crossing fingers and toes

All 27 of them.....

'Unjustifiably excessive': Not even London cops can follow law with their rubbish gang database

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Thumb Down

Re: Help me out here

Am I the only one that finds it depressing that this Youtube: Not the nine o'clock news Constable Savage sketch still rings true is as depressing now as it was in the 70s??

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Holmes

Re: The Ms-Access Gangs Violence Matrix

MS Access?? you're giving them far too much credit I'm betting like most users in my experience, they are calling an Excel spreadsheet a database.

Openreach v Ofcom dark fibre legal bill bounced back to Competition Appeal Tribunal

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Pirate

Re: A patch

Not really Ofcom has a goverment remit making them privateers ;-)

Oz telcos' club asks: Why the hell do Australia Post, rando councils, or Taxi Services Commission want comms metadata?

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Big Brother

Scope creep??

It's all fine it's not like there has been a long history of this kind of legislation being abused by useless busybodies that have no sense of proportion right? PDF Big Brother Watch: How RIPA has been used by local authorities and public bodies

UK.gov fishes for likes as it prepares to go solo on digital sales tax

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Coat

Re: Mihn Gott!!

Sorry I got that no 7 figure from the top search hit and didn't really look at the publisher: CNN Money: World's largest economies

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Thumb Up

Mihn Gott!!

How very dear you sir implement a tax in a place where our lobbying dollars are not working well enough to stall all progress.

Seriously new tax or not does anyone think that the megacorps are going to walk away from the potential profits of the worlds 7th larget economy??

I found a security hole in Steam that gave me every game's license keys and all I got was this... oh nice: $20,000

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FAIL

Re: What century is this?!

A years ago I was working for a small software company that made most of its money peddling web stores to small mom and pop type companies the e-store code was an in-house POS classic asp based monstrosity that every time we got a new customer would be copied from the last.

As you would expect in this scenario it was a total mess of ancient spaghetti code and then one day we woke up to find one of the customers had been hit by an automatic SQL injection script and was now trying to download a bunch of malware to anyone who viewed the site.

This obviously needed a fix, so a proper fix would be to go through every place in the code where a variable was incoming and do a proper validation.

But that was far too expensive for the boss when you take into account we were at that point managing ~30 of these messes all with slightly different code for each customer.

So the "genius" fix the boss came up with was to look at all incoming data from the browser the global.asax file and if it saw a single quote or a semicolon it would stop processing the request.

making it impossible to receive any business from any O'leary or the like.

If Shadow Home Sec Diane Abbott can be reeled in by phishers, truly no one is safe

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Joke

Re: The source appears to be a small nation off the coast of Europe. Targetting now.

Dammit, there goes Cyprus now where am I going to go on holiday.

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Mushroom

The breeding grounds

Given that all home Secretaries shadow or not in my lifetime have been barely human swivel-eyed loons can we attempt to triangulate the source and turn it into a glass crater for the good of all humanity?

Lucky, lucky, Westminster residents: Who better to look after your housing benefits than Capita?

}{amis}{ Silver badge
Joke

Dont Worry Dilbert will fix all!!

http://dilbert.com/strip/2018-10-30

Stairway to edam: Swiss bloke blasts roquefort his cheese, thinks Led Zep might make it tastier

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Go

But where is the "Best"

Richard Cheese will surely win!

Slabs, huh, what are they are good for? Er, not quite absolutely nothing

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Paris Hilton

Life Span

I do wonder how much if the "Disappointing Permanence" of the tablet market is due the analysts desperately wanting the tablets to sell like phones I've had my Xperia Z tablet since they were released in 2013 and its still going strong, in that time period I've gone through 3 phones.

It's raining drones, but just one specimen: DJI's Matrice 200 quadcopter

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Holmes

Re: Manned multicopters? No thanks

it is a bit of a 6 and 2 threes though helicopter crashes caused by hardware failure are usually catastrophically caused by either a rotor head or gearbox fail your really lucky if its something that leaves enough of the system working to make a safe autorotation landing.

manned multi-rotors do have the possibility to be safer as each rotor can be an almost totally independent system and unless you are a total looney you won't be flying a manned quadcopter with no redindancy if you look at most of the test manned multi rotors they are using 8 or more props which should allow at least a 2 prop fail more if you are lucky with the location of the breakages.

Mourning Apple's war against sockets? The 2018 Mac mini should be your first port of call

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Windows

Not bad

Looking at it the price is up but not by much when you look at it as a workstation the make or break for me would be how noisy it is when you are thrashing it.

£220k fines for dodgy dialling duo who didn't do due dil on data

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Flame

Mass Dialers

Is their actually a legitimate use for mass dialing gear other than to extract money from the most vulnerable member's of society, if not then just ban the lot and then use of it would be a criminal offense so the directors of these rackets companies could be held personally responsible.

Shift-work: Keyboards heaped in a field push North Yorks council's fly-tipping buttons

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Holmes

Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

I'm going to guess this lot came from somewhere that has some form of teaching going on the colorful one in the pic looks like the type they use to teach touch typing in schools like : LessonBoard

My bet would be on a local collage or maby prison had a refit done and somebody skimped on the disposal costs.

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Pint

ARRRG the Punnage!

Have one of these =>

Apple breathes new life into MacBook Air with overhauled 2018 model

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Thumb Down

128GB???????

I know I am not the target market for this but even as a base model 128GB of SSD seems really tight, given that I can buy a 256Gb M.2 for £46.98 that's pretty awful when combined with the lack of an sd slot for expansion.

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