* Posts by John Styles

381 posts • joined 23 Jul 2007

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Vinyl, filofaxes – why not us too, pleads Nokia

John Styles

OK

So, who's going to do the Psion 3 reboot next?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, HMRC confirms Verify can STFU

John Styles

Re: Not more confusion!

I did think it amusing that they added SMS 2FA AFTER (or about the same time as, I guess) NIST recommended SMS 2FA be dropped because of insecurities.

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John Styles

Re: Fixed headline

Roses are wonderful

Violets are great

We're "redefining the relationship

between citizen and state"

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John Styles

Re: the headline

Me too!

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Roses are red, you're over the moon, 'cos you work in infosec, and you're retiring soon

John Styles

Roses are red

Someone's just farted

The Reg's sub-edit-

-or's slightly half-hearted

I think all of the headlines should have been put in this format for the day. Go large or go home.

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Imagine a ChromeOS-style Windows 10 ... oh wait, there it is and it's called Windows Cloud

John Styles

"imagine Chrome-Os Windows

An easy thing to do

No hell below us

It's just like Win RT

Imagine all the people

Using Windows Store..... ah ah.."...

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Head of GCHQ Robert Hannigan steps down for 'personal reasons'

John Styles

Retired to spend more time naked in a red North Face bag in a bath padlocked from the inside.

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Japan's terrifying techno-toilets will be made foreigner friendly, vow makers

John Styles

That's what I thought, but an Internet search suggests that it's all 100V but some is 50Hz and some is 60Hz.

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John Styles

The secret apparently is to buy Korean ones since they use 220V 60Hz rather than the anemic 100V used in Japan.

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Two new Raspberry Pi models emerge steaming from the oven

John Styles

Off topic (a bit) but...

... I thought of a perfect slogan for Windows 10 IoT on Raspbery Pi

"The APIs

That you despise

Can now be run

On Raspberry Pis"

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D-Link joins hands with Microsoft to give 'Super Wi-Fi' a push

John Styles

We had an 'internet radio' (which I quite liked), but the WiFi in it had a bug so that if there were an 11N network in range whilst it was booting up then it wouldn't boot.

To get round this, I could put a metal saucepan over it whilst it booted.

I don't think our cleaner ever really believed this explanation of why there was a big old fashioned metal saucepan by the bed.

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Elon Musk wants to get into the boring business, literally

John Styles

Why is this delusional wank being reported by anyone, accept to mock (which the Reg wins many points for essentially doing (*))?

We are very much in Dunning-Kruger territory. Perhaps we should rename Silicon Valley Dunning-Kruger Valley, currency the Dunning-Krugerrand (aka bitco(i)n).

(*) Talking of which, given that The Independent an online news site seems to get free publicity on the BBC New Channel's newspaper round-ups by virtue of knocking up a fake tabloid front page, can't you just mock one up, send the PDF to the BBC and have it featured?

Or is it necessary to have rented a printing press once? What are the criteria? We have an office A1 printer if it is necessary to have used one at least once, I will gladly video the filming process and send you the A1 sheet if this is a necessary criteria.

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Wearable eats wearable: Fitbit 'to buy Pebble' with a steal of a deal

John Styles

Grrrrrrrr.

This actually, at the advanced age of 52, will be the first bit of technology I will be really pissed off if I can't replace it like for like as I'm not convinced anything else is as good (I have a Garmin for running but it is too large and the power usage is too large to use as a watch, and the ones that do more just seem a bit physically ugly and have an ugly UI). I had an early Pebble and the build quality was crap and the thing to hold the charging lead to it was too feeble, but the Pebble Time is a thing of beauty.

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Gov's industrial strategy: 'Look, we've changed the words above our door'

John Styles

Re: Energy "Strategy"

Which is just as well as the visible hand will no longer be able to warm one as effectively thanks to the clamp down on exotic smut.

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A closer look at HPE's 'The Machine'

John Styles

Re: Actually a quantum leap will not be enough

Or indeed a Quantum Jump

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hchOYs_d_Bw

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Brexit at the next junction: Verity's guide to key post-vote skills

John Styles

Re: In settling for binary...

There is of course still in real use, the U.S. Survey Foot https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foot_(unit)#US_survey_foot

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Forget 'shadow IT' – it's 'self-starting IT' now

John Styles

Special Snowflake IT

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KCL staff offered emotional support, clergy chat to help get over data loss

John Styles

Your data's going to be living on a (server?) farm upstate where it can run and play

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UK.gov has 18,000 IT contractors on its books due to dearth of skills

John Styles

Re: Easy targets?

Conversely (and I write as a permanent employee of 31 years standing, 19 in this job), that IR35 was invented SPECIFICALLY to clobber I.T. contractors on the basis that they are 'nasty, smelly oiks who make lots of money but aren't people like us dahhling' . OK for your mate at the golf club to have his bit of strategic consultancy but not Fred the PL/SQL wizard, he's not the sort that this favourable tax treatment was intended for.

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A British phone you're not embarrassed to carry? You heard that right

John Styles

WileyFox, not to be confused with FileyWox, a Chinese restaurant in a small seaside town in North Yorkshire

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John Styles

Re: AKA 'old rectory syndrome'

Ha, yes my partner's Dad had a similarly exciting house. The highlight was the insurance loss adjuster coming to look at something for an insurance claim failing to put the car brake on sufficiently so the car rolled down and then off the steep and twisty drive, demolishing a wall.

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John Styles

AKA 'old rectory syndrome'

The theory being that in the US after you have made your 'million' (i.e. about 10 million, don't want to be one of the poor 'single digit millionaires') you think 'how can I make my billion' whereas in the UK you buy the Old Rectory in some bucolic village, get a few non-executive directorships, dabble half hardheartedly in another start up etc.

Frankly I would rather have the old rectory than a company full of nasty whiny people etc. with the danger any day one might be shafted by whatever platform one is build on / have another start up eat our lunch etc. so who can blame them?

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John Styles

Philip Hammond will be thrilled

England expects every man to do his duty (by starting a tech company then flogging it to the Japanese to help the balance of payments deficit)

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James Dyson's new startup: A university for engineers that doesn't suck

John Styles

In Malaysia presumably

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Stiff upper lips and sun glasses: the Chancellor bets on Brexit feeling

John Styles

Re: "British firms are on the cutting edge of Virtual Reality"

Ha ha. One year (I'm guessing early 90s) I split my PEP (as it was then) allowance between 3 British VR companies. One actually went bust and the other two lost money before I flogged the shares at a loss. I then put the rest into Psion and watched it gradually go down, cunningly selling them a month before Symbian was announced and they shot up :-)

[On average I actually made a reasonable amount on the tech firms I bought shares in at the time].

Of the VR companies, one was called Division which was in Bristol - the tech looked quite good but it had the Bristol INMOS gang weenie stench of death. The one that went bust was in Leicester and I think was concentrating on VR for games.

The 3rd I think did Superscape and were in Aldermaston. They were games people who decided to go up market to things like kitchen design.

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John Styles

Putting aside the wibbling about Brexit

What is the number 1 tech company in the UK now not a subsidiary of an overseas company now ARM has been flogged to Softbank?

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Ghost of DEC Alpha is why Windows is rubbish at file compression

John Styles

This does seem unusually pitiful in terms of The Register sensationalising Mr Chen's fine blog post then lots of blowhards wibbling away ignoring the point.

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Let's praise Surface, not bury it

John Styles

Agree 100% but...

... isn't the problem here that desktop application development environments have essentially stagnated for about 15 years in terms of tools that actually make producing attractive desktop applications easier?

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Finally, that tech fad's over: Smartwatch sales tank more than 50%

John Styles

I had an early Pebble but the build quality was a bit shite. I have a Pebble Time which is much better built. I also have a Garmin for running - I assume that the market segmentation here is such that this report is ignoring Garmins (etc.) without some sort of 'smart' behaviour? Knowing lots of runners etc. I know far more people with Garmins than smartwatches (and a tiny number with the Garmins that probably do count as being smart).

I suspect Pebble are a bit doomed and when this breaks I will have to get something not as good [Eeyore mode=true]

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VMS will be ready to run on x86 in 2019!

John Styles

We built this city.

We built this city.

We built this city on D C L.

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AT&T wants Time Warner

John Styles

These deals are all very confusing. After all AT&T (now) isn't AT&T (then).

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What will happen when I'm too old to push? (buttons, that is)

John Styles

See also the LED on the electric toothbrush - sodding flashing green whilst charging.

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Mysterious algorithms, black-box AI recruiters are binning our résumés

John Styles

Re: Could be worse - you could be jailed

An 'AI' system is any system more intelligent than the sales person trying to sell it.

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‘Inflexion point’ BlackBerry washes hands of hardware biz

John Styles

Where are they made these days (prior to this announcement)? Are jobs going or is it all outsourced to a Chinese megacorps anyway?

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Heathrow airport and stock exchange throw mystery BSODs

John Styles

My favourite was on a minibus from Birmingham Airport to an off-airport car park. The PC existed to show two images and alternate between them (one saying 'don't forget to give the driver your keys' and one showing their logo) - perhaps they could have printed out 2 A3 sheets and laminated them? However everytime the minibus went over any sort of bump the PC rebooted itself so you got the BIOS boot sequence, then (I think) Windows, then booted into some VB app to show the two things.

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The next Bond – Basildon or Bass-Ass? YOU decide

John Styles

Jessica Alba

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Corbyn lied, Virgin Trains lied, Harambe died

John Styles

Man is born free and is everywhere in trains.

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Microsoft’s Continuum: Game changer or novelty?

John Styles

Oooerrr HP

"making the beast with two docks" - is that some kind of euphemism?

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By 2040, computers will need more electricity than the world can generate

John Styles

particularly about the future (usually attributed to Niels Bohr, GBATG if it really was him)

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Softbank promises stronger ARM: Greater overseas reach and double the UK jobs

John Styles

Now..

... imagine having to explain to Corbyn and McDonnell what ARM do and why they should care about it.

(or indeed May and Hammond, but the idea of explaining to to Corbyn and McDonnell seems funnier to me).

As a friend said, if this were an unsuccessful business being sold off, Corbyn, McDonnell and half of Momentum would be picketing outside the business by now.

(What is the next largest UK 'flag-ship' tech company now, anyway?)

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Next month's Firefox 48 is looking Rusty – and that's a very good thing

John Styles

Re: So, Rust is now "a thing"

Must have 7 years experience of Rust

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Judge slams BT for blaming engineer after 7 metre ceiling plunge

John Styles

Interesting

When our office switched from Virgin to someone using the BT network for its fixed line connection, OpenReach came out and did a survey and said that the work would have to be done by a contractor as the work was about ground level - OpenCantReach perhaps? Bizarrely, OpenReach told the subcontractor a 10 foot ladder was needed whereas it was more stepstool sort of height.

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Bing web searches may reveal you have cancer (so, er, don't use Bing?)

John Styles

Re: shoulder pain, agony cancer death?

Yes, lung cancer is one of the things that a shoulder pain can be a symptom of. Deep joy. As a fully paid up hypochondriac I went to see the doctor to check it wasn't that. My null hypothesis (and the physio's when I went to see one) was that it was caused by the dog (large, strong, stupid) straining after hedgehogs.

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French thrash Brits, Germans and Portuguese in IT innovation

John Styles

"What about us brain-dead slobs?

You'll all be given DevOps jobs"

Monorail, monorail, monorail.

I've sold DevOps to North Haverbrook, Ogdenville and Brockway.

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Google's dream city isn't a new idea

John Styles

Re: Yo Ho Ho and *HeEURGh*

That would be a violation of the 3rd Benthic Treaty with the Deep Ones.

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Is Microsoft's chatty bot platform just Clippy Mark 2?

John Styles

I thought the same thing

I thought the same thing, the interesting thing is that there was some sort of Microsoft Agent SDK / toolkit - there is still a trace of it on MSDN - https://msdn.microsoft.com/en-us/library/ms695784(v=vs.85).aspx

I was never quite sure what it was supposed to be for.

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$17 smartwatch sends something to random Chinese IP address

John Styles

Re: I will worry

An excellent and unjustly little known film.

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Microsoft Office 365: You don't need 27 floppies, but there is desktop friction

John Styles

Yes, obviously, I was simplifying. This is on user's computers, not mine - therefore our documentation has to include exactly the sort of irksome wibble that you describe above and the customers have to understand it (or more likely CBA because in an organisation of thousands of users, only a handful need ACE)

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John Styles

One of the issues with having Office 365 is that you don't get Ace installed on your PC - see https://support.microsoft.com/en-us/kb/2874601

Obviously a PITA if you want to use Ace. Even more if you write software which uses Ace (not for very much - just for import and export) and have to think of how to document this given Microsoft's opaque documentation on when you get Ace and when you don't.

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Sorry slacktivists: The Man is shredding your robo responses

John Styles

Can't both sides lose?

The MoF consultation about the BBC was ludicrously jargon ridden and (and I am no great fan of the BBC) seemed worded to be slanted towards a particular outcome.

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