* Posts by macjules

584 posts • joined 7 Oct 2014

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If you can't beat AI, join it: Boffinry biz baron Elon Musk backs brain-machine interface biz

macjules
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Re: Been reading Sci-Fi?

Nope, but I did finally get to watch Black Mirror: White Christmas last night.

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Cheap, flimsy, breakable and replaceable – yup, Ikea, you'll be right at home in the IoT world

macjules
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Re: Why?

I have one better: iTeenager beta v3.

"While away iTeenager will make your home look populated. Would-be burglars with be thwarted by the amount of unwashed dishes strewn around the kitchen, all lights being left on late into the night and both the television and house sound system left on full volume. iTeenager completes the home security aspect with an occasional random teenager party*. Available now at a limited time (between 13 and 19)"

* Remember: the cost of all damages and lost valuable wine collections is YOUR responsibility.

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macjules
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Re: Yet another offensively pointless First World problem

But interesting from the IoT aspect. Lots of people are converting to the method of running WiFi to different floors via the mains ring. I wonder how hard would it be to hack through that iOS app into someone's home networks (always assuming their WiFi password isn't as simple as 'password')?

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LastPass scrambles to fix another major flaw – once again spotted by Google's bugfinders

macjules
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Re: Best Practice...

Not sure what other 'lazy' methods exist. Personally I have all 'remember password' options unchecked on browsers and if I need a password then I have a password-protected iOS note with everything on it ... until Google Keep allows secure notes.

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macjules
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Re: "some people prefer to think that ignorance is bliss."

Yes but:

This attack is unique and highly sophisticated. We don't want to disclose anything specific about the vulnerability or our fix that could reveal anything to less sophisticated but nefarious parties. So you can expect a more detailed post mortem once this work is complete," the firm said.

WHAT f*cking attack? You have not been attacked at all, by anyone. You released shoddily-crafted software and then some developers, to whom you had added your bug-ridden software by way of an extension to their browser, picked up on the fact that it was badly written and documented all the issues. LastPass should be thankful that Google do not release a Chrome update that blocks their extension.

</SELFRIGHTEOUSRANT>

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Spotted: Bizarre SpaceX rocket-snatching machine that looks like it belongs on Robot Wars

macjules
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I'm pretty sure that is Hammond centre SSE, legless on the ground by the yellow bucket. No wait, it's a crash-test dummy.

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Good news, everyone! Two pints a day keep heart problems at bay

macjules
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'Moderate' drinking = a lot less than that. On the other hand 'real' drinking = 'Darling, that was an amazing bottle of Petrus, fancy a glass of Armagnac before bed?'

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Amazing new WikiLeaks CIA bombshell: Agents can install software on Apple Macs, iPhones right in front of them

macjules
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Haha Foiled!

But I have zer Mac OSX Sierra! So I am INVINCIBLE! INVINCIBLE I tell you.

Well, for at least 2 years .. or until GCHQ catches up with OSX updates.

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'Clearance sale' shows Apple's iPad is over. It's done

macjules
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Re: Education PC seller says Apple is no good in that market

On the other hand I have several hundred 'creative types' working under my auspices ... and we have precisely 1 iPad Pro. Not even sure why we have that one though: I suspect it was a 'we have GOT to have one of those' fanboi reaction.

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NASA to fire 1Gbps laser 'Wi-Fi' ... into spaaaaace

macjules
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Re: They'll only need two

You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have satellites with frickin' laser beams attached to them.

Had to stick that one in somewhere.

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What should password managers not do? Leak your passwords? What a great idea, LastPass

macjules
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Oops

I really do not believe that you meant to say that. Perhaps LastPass' next venture should be a decent notepad with a corporate pen.

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London councils seek assurance over Capita's India offshoring plans

macjules
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Paris Hilton

Re: Far too late

Fantastic news. Only Capita could be starting to outsource jobs to India, just as most other companies are already starting to bring their call centres back into the UK.

According to a letter from Capita to one IT team working for a borough in the capital

That would be the crappy (geddit?) Lambeth 'portal' would it? All done in Drupal Views and DisplaySuite with about as much regard for users site security as Capita have for their UK contractors.

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FBI, NSA top brass: We've seen jack squat to back up Trump's claims of Obama wiretaps

macjules
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Re: Leaks

But not intelligence leaks. Those can damage a government, can affect the lives of people in the intelligence community and, most importantly, can also affect those living in fascist dictatorships such as Russia who are passing information back to the West.

Mind you, if you want to stop all the leaks in the USA all you need to do is to take Trump's phone away from him or shut down Twitter.

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MI5 man to steer GCHQ as Trump wiretapping saga continues

macjules
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Plus 1 to that

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Norfolk County Council sent filing cabinet filled with kids' info to a second-hand shop

macjules
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Well, they could admit they screwed up and pay up, in which case they only have to pay £48,000.00 ... but what's £12,000.00 when you're a local government bureaucrat with no responsibility or accountability.

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User jams up PC. Literally. No, we don't know which flavour

macjules
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Ditto, but my experience got even nastier in the early/mid 90's. When Iomega brought out the Zip disk there was already a 3.5 M.O. drive on the market for optical storage. Used to get roughly one or 2 call outs per month from graphic design companies where they had stuck a Zip disc into the optical drive or vice versa. Worse than that were said same graphic designers who would try and force a 44Mb Syquest 5.25" disc into a 5.25" M.O. drive, a machine that tended to cost thousands to buy.

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Microsoft kills Windows Vista on April 11: No security patches, no hot fixes, no support, nada

macjules
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Re: well duh

Maybe someone at Microsoft is just sick of Vista, too.

Most notably the poor buggers who were looking forwards to a career at Microsoft in OS development, only to end up working in the Vista support team.

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BT's Openreach to hire 1,500 engineers

macjules
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Re: Will they stop sabotaging competitors lines?

Not only their competitors but also their own lines.

I had a Redcare line installed at home after they had installed the telephone but well before OpenRetch turned up. OpenRetch's 'engineer' said he had to inspect the house lines and five minutes later I get a call from Redcare saying that my house is being broken into as someone has cut off the alarm line. Turns out the OR engineer did not know what the extra line was for and simply sliced through the line and then screwed a fastening over it to hold both bits in place as though nothing had happened.

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UK.gov gears up for IR35 private sector crackdown – say industry folk

macjules
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Re: In the context of low albedo kitchen utensils...

Exactly, It's end of year civil servant bonus time so, hey! let's alert the media to the fact that we are really keen on clamping down on evil tax-dodging, thieving bastards self-employed contractors.

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Headphone batteries flame out mid-flight, ignite new Li-Ion fears

macjules
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Re: There are three places...

Referring to Monday's article about smart teledildonics ...

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macjules
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Coat

She was definitely singed at.

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macjules
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Re: But a 14KW Power Wall...

Well, just thank God that Elon Musk isn't in the headphone business.

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Sources: Liberty Global, Vodafone take seats at negotiating table AGAIN

macjules
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Re: Emotive?

Yep, pity Liberty Global though when they realise what they have bought into...

LG: "Hello? Vodafone customer services? We would like to cancel our contract."

Vodafone CS: "Fuck off" Click.

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Dungeons & Dragons finally going digital

macjules
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Paris Hilton

Wel. obviously,

YOU ARE IN A MAZE OF TWISTING LITTLE PASSAGES, ALL DIFFERENT

And re Farage:

A little dwarf just walked around a corner, saw you, threw a little axe at you which missed, cursed, and ran away.

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National Insurance tax U-turn: Philip Hammond nixes NIC uptick

macjules
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Re: Pledges

You mean Jeremy Corbyn might vote against the government?

Doubt it.

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Microsoft's Slack-slapping 'Teams' slips into Office 365

macjules
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And what about Skype?

The shame of this is that Microsoft already have what could be the very best collaboration tool available: Skype. I did start out using Flowdock, also tried HipChat and rejected it the same day and we use Slack extensively, but none of those really come with good conversation or f2f tools in the way that Skype does. We use Slack with Zoom (try Zoom with more than 20 team videos connections ... or don't), but what would be fantastic would be Skype for Business with Slack-style integration for Teams.

Then again who am I kidding? This is Microsoft we are talking about, a company where 'innovation' means 'how much of our cash reserves can we plough into yet another failed venture?'

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Naming computers endangers privacy, say 'Net standards boffins

macjules
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Re: Kellyanne is already on to you

Donald's phone on the other hand just uses whatever name the hackers du jour assign it.

Or whatever the FSB decide to call it.

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Vodafone to bring 2,100 customer service jobs in-house

macjules
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That's a total of 1,200 new jobs, not 2,100.

Now you know what it means to get promised £120 compensation by Vodafone for their taking £1,800 out of your bank account for a £80 direct debit ... only for the compensation to fail to materialise. Vodafone and BT must be the only companies that, when you choose the 'I wish to cancel my service' option, put you on hold for 20 minutes to really wind you up.

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Intel swallows Tesla-hating self-driving car biz Mobileye for $15bn

macjules
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Oops

Mobileye's chairman and CTO Amnon Shashua warned that an autopilot system "is not designed to cover all possible crash situations in a safe manner ... It is a driver assistance system and not a driverless system."

I presume that this also excludes Über?

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Smart sex toys firm coughs up $3.75m in privacy lawsuit

macjules
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Joke

Re: teledildonics?

No, it counts as toyeurism.

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macjules
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Hopefully ...

The cheques (checks) will arrive in plain-paper envelopes.

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This is where UK's Navy will park its 75,000-ton aircraft carriers

macjules
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Thales under DCNS built the CDG carrier which is nuclear powered.

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macjules
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Re: sea power

The more interesting question is "How in clucking bell's name could you spend £200m on concrete?". I mean, who the hell is building this and why are they using unsold gold bullion bars from the BoE for the reinforcement struts? Also what is actually wrong with the existing jetties? I can recall (when we actually had a navy) seeing 2 carriers, Ark Royal and Invincible, lined up bow to stern at jetties in Portsmouth, so why can't we use those?

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Linus Torvalds explains how to Pull without jerking his chain

macjules
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Re: Linus being ... too nice?

Agreed. If you can't even write a commit message it shows that you are probably one of those sad gits (geddit?) who use VCS UI apps such as Sourcetree.

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Official: America auto-scanned visitors' social media profiles. Also: It didn't work properly

macjules
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Isn't it nice to know that Capita/Steria are not the only companies on the planet that take taxpayers' money and screw things up?

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DOOM'd! Quake god John Carmack lobs $22m sueball at ZeniMax

macjules
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"ZeniMax says it plans to fight the suit."

Will that be DM or CTF?

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Royal Navy's newest ship formally named in Glasgow yard

macjules
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Re: Pointy bit below the sharp end

I understand it is the new Bofors 30mm 'White Flag' gun system.

When approached by the Iranian navy the cannon is swung upwards and a white flag deploys. An automated announcement then tells all hands to lay down any knives or guns and reminds them that loss of iPhones or iPods will be compensated for.

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macjules
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Re: 30mm gun

Many moons ago I was a professional cloud sniper. We would quit happily spin up Bllndfire and shout 'that's a hit!' while our pristine unfired Rapier missiles sat on the rails never to be launched, until a few years later when they all got fired off in the South Atlantic .. well those that didn't get blown up with Atlantic Conveyor.

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macjules
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Dear God, couldn't they have done better than that? The author of "The Complete Book Of Funeral Planning: Readings & Music: How To Plan And Organise The Funeral Your Loved Ones Would Most Appreciate ". Not very Senior Service appropriate methinks.

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macjules
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Re: HMS Forth

Looks like someone repossessed an oligarch's yacht, stuck a cannon on it, painted it RN grey and extended the helipad to take a Merlin.

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User lubed PC with butter, because pressing a button didn't work

macjules
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Hero worship your IT

I find that it helps to remind the company that IT is not all about "have you tried restarting the machine?". Every so often I make sure that a specially selected individual, usually chosen for his/her attitude towards IT, gets a copy of their Chrome browsing history sent to to both to their manager and to themselves with a warning that company computers remain the property of the company at all times and must only be used for company business ... which does not include youporn.com or similar.

Suffice to say I do not do this to accounts, HR or corporate governance.

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Tesla 'API crashes' after update, angry rich bods complain

macjules
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Re: Electric Cars and Cloudy Apps...

Umm, closer than you think. I was told to make sure that both my phone and the car were 100% charged, switch both off and then wait 10 minutes.

12 hours later, It did actually did work.

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Firefox 52 kills plugins – except Flash – and runs up a red flag for HTTP

macjules
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Re: Flash left, ad blockers gone?

The Flash team at Adobe doesn't accept bribes. If they did we might know exactly who they are and be able to coat the twenties with arsenic.

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Success in the bedroom breeds success in the boardroom – research

macjules
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To counter that one: why is Donald Trump such a grumpy bastard then?

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macjules
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Re: elevated mood

Know the feeling. MIne tends to start a bit closer to home with, "now you have had your way with me can you fix [insert ridiculously unnecessary household chore here] please?"

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Facebook shopped BBC hacks to National Crime Agency over child abuse images probe

macjules
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Re: Answer

Pretty clear that the BBC have actually committed an offence. Their actions in sending the images back to Facebook do in fact breach the Indecent Images of Children (IIOC) as it is an offence to 'make; an image, i.e. download or print out an image under Section 1 PCA 1978. Give that they got away with Savile I hope that this time they really get clobbered.

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Pence v Clinton: Both used private email for work, one hacked, one accused of hypocrisy

macjules
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Re: A suprise?

Perhaps you do not quite understand the meaning of hypocrisy. Just to help here is the Wikipedia definition:

Hypocrisy is the contrivance of a false appearance of virtue or goodness, while concealing real character or inclinations, especially with respect to religious and moral beliefs; hence in general sense, dissimulation, pretense, sham.

Now, saying that it was wrong for Clinton to use her personal email account for government business, while at the same time Pence was doing exactly the same thing himself equals hypocrisy.

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Blighty floods with techies' tears as Capita boss Parker quits

macjules
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Re: such a diverse range of businesses

You left out "Buy big yacht and hire a moron from the Monaco Morons Yacht Club to oversee the financial collapse of your empire"

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macjules
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Re: It's tears

If so, the tears have not stopped running down my face. Worst company ever to work for, and I worked at BT in the 90's which is a pretty good benchmark of how not to run a company.

Trouble is that they are going to get all those IR35 contractors coming to them from the MoD, let alone the fact that they are probably going to get a lot of contracts back from Steria after the "Test results? What test results?' fiasco.

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