* Posts by Carbon life unit 5,232,556

34 posts • joined 15 Sep 2014

'Yes, yes... YES!' Philae lands on COMET 67P

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Next time someone says its not rocket science

Say "its not landing a small space craft on a rock travelling at 135,000Kph at over 6 billion Km away"

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Behold the Lumia 535 NOTkia: Microsoft wipes Nokia brand from mobes

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

If they thought sales were bad before....

hmm

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FUTURE ROBOTS will EXTERMINATE UK jobs – study

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Who's going to flip the burgers...

for these machines?

Auto burger flippers

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That 'tech-free' Nophone? It was already out years ago

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

How is this a thing?

Jus buy a banana, when you get bored with it it becomes a handy snack. The upgrades are also cheap. Or there's the apple alternative, Granny Smith or Pink lady f'instance.

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IT JOB OUTSOURCING: Will it ever END?

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

One day they'll be outsourcing to us.

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Amazon's AWS opens data center in Germany – just as we said

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Any US connection at all...

is enough for US plod to claim jurisdiction, let alone being owned by US corp.

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Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Do they sell...

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/08/18/monty_python_mints/

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'Dancing Jesus' file-sharer found guilty

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Servers in USoA?

crazy fule!

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FBI boss: We don't want a backdoor, we want the front door to phones

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Shades of jude Death

Damm you autocorrect!

Judge Death - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judge_Death

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Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Shades of jude Death

Why not go the whole hog?

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Mobile coverage on trains really is pants

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Mobile coverage crap?

Who knew?

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Beers all round as Vulture 2 lands in Blighty

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Vulture and

a couple of bald eagles?

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'I went from a two-hour commute to a 10-min scooter ride by the sea'

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Having been scuba diving in British waters

I have only one thing to say, lucky barsteward!

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El Reg Christmas Lectures to span space, big data and GCHQ

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Done and done

London is a black hole, everyone gravitates here at some point.

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'Bill Gates swallowing bike on a beach' is ideal password say boffins

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Not compatible

Often they also give hints about how the password should be made up!

Talk about giving the hacker a head start!

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Chap runs Windows 95 on Android Wear

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Jeez,

Computerised S&M

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CONSUMERISM IS PAST ITS SELL-BY DATE: Die now, pay later

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Thats the point!

Not forgetting, pogo stick, dog sledge, moon shoes or just a good ol' 200 hundred quid bike. The 2 miles to my train station takes a little under 8 minutes and I'm no Chris Wiggins (or what ever his name is), bikes are tax subsidised too, 20p per mile (to/from work) and purchase is PAYE and VAT free if you're lucky enough to have access to a ride to work scheme, or like me, buy one on ebay for ~£30.

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What’s the KEYBOARD SHORTCUT for Delete?! Look in a contextual menu, fool!

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Press any key

Where's the "any" key?

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It's official: EU chiefs WILL probe Apple's Irish tax deal

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: The money was only resting in our account

Was that money earmarked to send all the bent iPhones to Lourdes

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Consumers agree to give up first-born child for free Wi-Fi – survey

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Exchange eldest for free wifi?

Cool where do I send the scrote (yes he's 17, good luck)

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EU to accuse Ireland of giving Apple an overly peachy tax deal – report

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

This is where IScotland

Could've cleaned up

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Cut-off North Sea island: Oh crap, ferry's been and gone. Need milk. SUMMON THE DRONE

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Wouldn't it be easier to train dolphins

To swim across

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Apple 'Genius': iPhone 6? We've had NO COMPLAINTS about our BENDY iThing

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Trollface

Just when all the pundits were slating Apple for the yestertech, they come out with a flexible device, genius

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Amazon shovels cash into hush-hush Lab126 despite Fire Phone fizzle

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Gotta hand it to Bezos

he's in it for the long game.

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Move over, Apple Pay: Tesco trials PayQwiq phone-flash pay app

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Hmmm

I am, but the system has to be quick and simple, I am a fan of contactless payments as it greatly reduces the friction when it comes to paying. This Tesco thing is making it worse.

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Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Sounds like a non starter

To much faff

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Moon landing was real and WE CAN PROVE IT, says Nvidia

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Pint

'course its not a hoax

Klargon-epfinkkyxxq from Planet X told me about it, in a dream.

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Buying memory in an iPhone 6: Like wiping your bottom with dollar bills

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Someone has to pay Tim Cook his ~$300,000,000+ bonus

:-Q

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Reg bloke zips through an iPHONE 6 queue from ZERO to 60 SECONDS

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: retards

well it's a hobby

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Your chance to win the world's only handheld ZX Spectrum

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Trollface

Probably a reason why it's the only one ...

Ooooh!

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Microsoft splurges 2½ INSTAGRAMS buying Minecraft maker Mojang

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Cant wait ...

for new versions of live meeting.

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Brit telcos warn Scots that voting Yes could lead to hefty bills

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Never mind all this nonsense

What are the Scotch going to do without PoundWorld/Land

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Get your Indian Landfill Android One handsets - they're only SIXTY QUID

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Especially the headline where they call it "Landfill" - sheesh

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eBay DROPS DEAD AGAIN - tat bazaar says sorry, scrambles to resurrect site

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Pay twice

Giving people what they want, at a price they're prepared to pay?!

The bastards!

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