* Posts by Carbon life unit 5,232,556

34 posts • joined 15 Sep 2014

'Yes, yes... YES!' Philae lands on COMET 67P

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Next time someone says its not rocket science

Say "its not landing a small space craft on a rock travelling at 135,000Kph at over 6 billion Km away"

Behold the Lumia 535 NOTkia: Microsoft wipes Nokia brand from mobes

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

If they thought sales were bad before....

hmm

FUTURE ROBOTS will EXTERMINATE UK jobs – study

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Who's going to flip the burgers...

for these machines?

Auto burger flippers

That 'tech-free' Nophone? It was already out years ago

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

How is this a thing?

Jus buy a banana, when you get bored with it it becomes a handy snack. The upgrades are also cheap. Or there's the apple alternative, Granny Smith or Pink lady f'instance.

IT JOB OUTSOURCING: Will it ever END?

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

One day they'll be outsourcing to us.

Amazon's AWS opens data center in Germany – just as we said

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Any US connection at all...

is enough for US plod to claim jurisdiction, let alone being owned by US corp.

Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Do they sell...

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/08/18/monty_python_mints/

'Dancing Jesus' file-sharer found guilty

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Servers in USoA?

crazy fule!

FBI boss: We don't want a backdoor, we want the front door to phones

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Shades of jude Death

Damm you autocorrect!

Judge Death - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judge_Death

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Shades of jude Death

Why not go the whole hog?

Mobile coverage on trains really is pants

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Mobile coverage crap?

Who knew?

Beers all round as Vulture 2 lands in Blighty

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Vulture and

a couple of bald eagles?

'I went from a two-hour commute to a 10-min scooter ride by the sea'

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Having been scuba diving in British waters

I have only one thing to say, lucky barsteward!

El Reg Christmas Lectures to span space, big data and GCHQ

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Done and done

London is a black hole, everyone gravitates here at some point.

'Bill Gates swallowing bike on a beach' is ideal password say boffins

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Not compatible

Often they also give hints about how the password should be made up!

Talk about giving the hacker a head start!

Chap runs Windows 95 on Android Wear

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Jeez,

Computerised S&M

CONSUMERISM IS PAST ITS SELL-BY DATE: Die now, pay later

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Thats the point!

Not forgetting, pogo stick, dog sledge, moon shoes or just a good ol' 200 hundred quid bike. The 2 miles to my train station takes a little under 8 minutes and I'm no Chris Wiggins (or what ever his name is), bikes are tax subsidised too, 20p per mile (to/from work) and purchase is PAYE and VAT free if you're lucky enough to have access to a ride to work scheme, or like me, buy one on ebay for ~£30.

What’s the KEYBOARD SHORTCUT for Delete?! Look in a contextual menu, fool!

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Press any key

Where's the "any" key?

It's official: EU chiefs WILL probe Apple's Irish tax deal

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: The money was only resting in our account

Was that money earmarked to send all the bent iPhones to Lourdes

Consumers agree to give up first-born child for free Wi-Fi – survey

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Exchange eldest for free wifi?

Cool where do I send the scrote (yes he's 17, good luck)

EU to accuse Ireland of giving Apple an overly peachy tax deal – report

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

This is where IScotland

Could've cleaned up

Cut-off North Sea island: Oh crap, ferry's been and gone. Need milk. SUMMON THE DRONE

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Wouldn't it be easier to train dolphins

To swim across

Apple 'Genius': iPhone 6? We've had NO COMPLAINTS about our BENDY iThing

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Trollface

Just when all the pundits were slating Apple for the yestertech, they come out with a flexible device, genius

Amazon shovels cash into hush-hush Lab126 despite Fire Phone fizzle

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Gotta hand it to Bezos

he's in it for the long game.

Move over, Apple Pay: Tesco trials PayQwiq phone-flash pay app

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Hmmm

I am, but the system has to be quick and simple, I am a fan of contactless payments as it greatly reduces the friction when it comes to paying. This Tesco thing is making it worse.

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Sounds like a non starter

To much faff

Moon landing was real and WE CAN PROVE IT, says Nvidia

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Pint

'course its not a hoax

Klargon-epfinkkyxxq from Planet X told me about it, in a dream.

Buying memory in an iPhone 6: Like wiping your bottom with dollar bills

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Someone has to pay Tim Cook his ~$300,000,000+ bonus

:-Q

Reg bloke zips through an iPHONE 6 queue from ZERO to 60 SECONDS

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: retards

well it's a hobby

Your chance to win the world's only handheld ZX Spectrum

Carbon life unit 5,232,556
Trollface

Probably a reason why it's the only one ...

Ooooh!

Microsoft splurges 2½ INSTAGRAMS buying Minecraft maker Mojang

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Cant wait ...

for new versions of live meeting.

Brit telcos warn Scots that voting Yes could lead to hefty bills

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Never mind all this nonsense

What are the Scotch going to do without PoundWorld/Land

Get your Indian Landfill Android One handsets - they're only SIXTY QUID

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Especially the headline where they call it "Landfill" - sheesh

eBay DROPS DEAD AGAIN - tat bazaar says sorry, scrambles to resurrect site

Carbon life unit 5,232,556

Re: Pay twice

Giving people what they want, at a price they're prepared to pay?!

The bastards!

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