* Posts by JJKing

559 posts • joined 5 Jul 2014

Page:

UK code breakers drop Bombe, Enigma and Typex simulators onto the web for all to try

JJKing Bronze badge
Thumb Down

Re: You have to run GCHQ code

Probably a smart thing to do Mayday. I just went to open the link only to have a Bitcoin Mining box flash up on my screen for about half a second. Decided to give the second one a miss.

Click here to see the New Zealand livestream mass-murder vid! This is the internet Facebook, YouTube, Twitter built!

JJKing Bronze badge
Flame

Ambiguity; not in this case.

On a multi-national platform, criminality is not black and white.

WHAT? Murder is not black and white???? Shooting unarmed people is not black and white??? I hope I have misunderstood you but that is moronic because in this case it is very much black and white.

Thank you to the Editors for not posting that piece of filth's name.

All good, leave it with you...? Chap is roped into tech support role for clueless customer

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Not a "Oh by the way" story.

Was waiting at a school for their IT teacher to arrive and unlock the Server room when I heard someone complaining about the padlock on the front gate was very difficult to open. Me doing nothing while being paid borrows pencil from Admin office grabs razor knife from bag and shaves pencil lead (graphite) into lock. Insert key and restored it to brand new functionality. That was Monday. On Friday it was back to the office day and I get ripped a new one for wasting time fixing their padlock. Didn't matter it would cost $60+ to replace and I got it working while waiting for the key holder to arrive. Had 800+ PCs to look after, 41 Servers, 103 printers, 50 odd 3Com SuperStack II switches that like to arrive DOA or died within 6 months of installation and about 120 laptops spread over 16 locations with 3.5 hours per site per fortnight. Bloody ridiculous so I left a few months later.

UK joins growing list of territories to ban Boeing 737 Max flights as firm says patch incoming

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Panic

Still drive your car even with the hundreds killed around the world every day?

Visitors still go the USA even with the thousands dead from guns each year.

Flying is still 800 times safer than being a passenger in a bus. Should we stop busses driving on the road when one crashes?

300 deaths though tragic will not keep the MAX 10 grounded forever. The reason they crashed will be isolated and fixed and life will go on and aviation will have learnt and important safety lesson.......until the next one arises.

JJKing Bronze badge
Mushroom

Re: The reason that the Max series need MCAS

Perhaps you would like to tell that to Airbus. They did that same thing years ago.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Air_France_Flight_296

IT guy at US govt fraud watchdog stole 16 computers from... US govt fraud watchdog

JJKing Bronze badge
Unhappy

I do like the Surface but.........try getting it fixed.

On the surface, a straightforward crime and then there was the theft of the items as well.

Too may stories about the Surface having a component go bad after warranty period ends and the poor bloody owners are being told by Micro$oft they will just need to buy a new one. Gone are the days when you could pull down a machine, de-solder the naughty, recalcitrant part and replace it. Now even the manufacturer is unable to fix their own product.

Canada has lunar dreams as Germany worries about what lies beneath

JJKing Bronze badge
Pirate

Re: Conclusive proof...

Ahhhhh, nobdy expects the Spanish Insulation. Our 2 main weapons are.......

JJKing Bronze badge
Coat

A different kind of Mars bar.

He is always going on about how great the benefits are there. Personally I do not think it appropriate to be Mars debating on company time.

Thanks folks, I am here till Friday.....oh wait, it is Friday. Bugger!

Raspberry Pi 3 Model A+ support to arrive in Linux 5.1

JJKing Bronze badge
Thumb Up

The Pi is an exceptional tool, IMO.

As someone who only had a SlideRule to make calculations at school, these Raspberry Pi device blow me away just as much now as when they were first produced. I guess they are now the equivalent of my meccano sets. Long may the Pi keep being improved upon and produced.

'Java 9, it did break some things,' Oracle bod admits to devs still clinging to version 8

JJKing Bronze badge
Paris Hilton

Even Paris is upset with Java.

I am so glad I was sitting down when I read that headline. I was shocked, shocked I tell you to learn that Java breaks things. Next you'll be telling me Flash is full of holes.

One-time Mars InSight Lander engineer scores $1.5m redress over whistleblower sacking

JJKing Bronze badge
IT Angle

Future Stress

But here arises a problem. You are now known as a whistle-blower so every time you apply for a job you are going to be worried/stressed that you won't get it because of your honest past endeavour. Some, likely a lot, of employers are not going to look favourably on someone who will do the right thing and drop the company in the shit as a result.

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Due Restitution

CYA, isn't that the big building in Langley, Virginia.

Excuse me while I get my micro-rod to catch the microfiche.

Hipster whines at tech mag for using his pic to imply hipsters look the same, discovers pic was of an entirely different hipster

JJKing Bronze badge
Coat

Re: Thought it was Just Me

Were you ok?

Did you work all night and work all day, wear high heals, suspender and a bra and want to be just like your dad?

Just picking up my trainee lumberjack kit on my way out the door.

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Why anti-conformists always end up looking the same

We are Hipsters "resistance is futile", your sameness will be assimilated and we will add your biological and technological sameness to our own.

I for one will not welcome our Hipster over / under err sameness Lords. How will we know who is in charge if they all look the same; will one be called Jeff Vader?

Bloke thrown in the cooler for eight years after 3D-printing gun to dodge weapon ban

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: But Background Checks Don't Work!

* Even the Swiss have experience of gun-related massacres (Zug cantonal massacre in 2001).

Yeah but not 2, 3 or 4 every week.

It's now 2019, and your Windows DHCP server can be pwned by a packet, IE and Edge by a webpage, and so on

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Disk in continuous use.

To whoever had the continuous disk problem, my suggestion to remove the 2019-01 Preview of Monthly Quality Rollup for Windows 7 for x64-based Systems KB4480955 was wrong. This one just killed USB ports. Sorry.

JJKing Bronze badge
Go

Re: Disk in continuous use.

This was one that resulted in Printers and Shares becoming unavailable.

wusa /uninstall /kb:4480970

The other which is more likely to be your issues was the 2019-01 Preview of Monthly Quality Rollup for Windows 7 for x64-based Systems KB4480955. Remove that and see how you go.

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Job security

99 bugs in the code

99 bugs in the code

Take one down and patch it around

103 bugs in the code

Plagiarised and not original.......sorry.

JJKing Bronze badge
Joke

Re: How oh how

Pah! We don't need no stinking Patches.

A once-in-a-lifetime Opportunity: NASA bids emotional farewell to its cocky, hardworking RC science car on Mars

JJKing Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Re: Opportunity---NNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

The icon says it all. :-)

JJKing Bronze badge
Alien

NASA must be so proud and yet sad at the same time. You guyz (written as gender neutral) RULE!

What can one say except WOW!!!

It started work the year my daughter started High School. It died the year she finished University. Such a long time but each a magnificent achievement.

Are NASA sure it was the wind clearing the dust from the solar panels? I seem to remember an HP printer advert suggesting a different possibility

Happy Satellite Collision Day! It is 10 years since Russia and Iridium got too close for comfort

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: At least China is trying to do something about it*

Isn't Spanky the same clown who thought you just needed to wash the coal with water to make it clean coal? He has the IQ of road kill but he has the best words, you know, like covfefe.

JJKing Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Re: At least China is trying to do something about it*

Give the guy a break!

Yeah, preferably his neck.

JJKing Bronze badge
IT Angle

BJ, I would never have accused you of being an elephant but the Orange Idiot on the other hand is a different story.

Ever yearn for the Windows 95 shutdown sound? TADA! There's an Electron app for that

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Painfully slow

Did you sing along with the bootup song of the floppy drives making their noise and what about the dial-up modems making a connection. Then too?

High-speed broadband fiber in America: You want the good news or bad news first?

JJKing Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Re: Microtrenching can go far deeper than four inch

Now just you stop right there. No need to become all practical and logical on us with fibre running next to power cables. :-)

I would like to say that the unsuccessful Google fibre will not become wasted money and time but rather a lesson in not how to lay fibre which will save the local taxpayers money when the town & city administrations get to rolling out their own fibre.

Cop films chap on body-worn cam because he 'complains about cops a lot'. Chap complains

JJKing Bronze badge
Black Helicopters

Re: How covert was it?

I had a bright red warning light in my car that warned me that the airbag in my steering wheel was faulty. Since I wasn't too enthused at spending AUD$1,500 to get it fixed, I just covered the annoyingly bright bugger with a couple of pieces of black electrical tape. It's not rocket, or in this case, camera science.

If they remove their identification when on duty at protest marches that could result in a bit of push and shove, then what's to stop them having pre-prepared; tape LED for the covering thereof.

Reliable system was so reliable, no one noticed its licence had expired... until it was too late

JJKing Bronze badge
IT Angle

Why or Why-not 2K

I was in my last year of school, 74 (see what I did there) and was watching a TV documentary about this looming problem that was going to happen just 60 seconds after 11:59pm on 31st December 1999 and how it needed to be fixed before then otherwise it would cause all sorts of problems. Now remember that this was way before Personal Computers were available but it was a widely known problem 26 years or more before in the industry since hell, there was a TV doco about it.

Fast forward many years and we have the "great panic" with retired coders lured from retirement to save the world from mass destruction (ok, the dramatic exaggeration is my poetic licence), planes falling from the skies and those litter bugs plus creating a nuisance criminals were going to be prematurely released from prisons (possibly along with the father rapist as well. For saving the world for worse fates in the future, these brave pensioners would end up earning pockets full of cash as a reward for their noble sacrifices.

It was Windows 98 that when released in mid May 1998, just 18½ months before armageddon and it was NOT Y2K compliant. WTF were Microdickheads thinking especially since I, as a PFY, had known about this problem some 24 years earlier. Still, it just goes to show that Microshaft didn't give a Microshit about their Microsoftware or their valueless customers even then (but we all knew this from years earlier though, didn't we). What a clusterfuck. :rolleyes:

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Not really a license story, but...

And I bet you never even got a THANK YOU for saving them.

JJKing Bronze badge
Coat

Re: Not only computer gear

Return to Vendor Why does that sound like an Elvis song?

Thank you very much. JJKing has now left the forum.

Windows Defender update: So secure, it wouldn't let Secure-Boot Windows PCs, er, boot

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Windows 7 and Update Kills USB Ports

Friend of mine just went to update Windows 7 with 2019-01 Preview of Monthly Quality Rollup for Windows 7 for x64-based Systems KB4480955 only to find all the USB ports were disabled. No mouse, no keyboard but was fortunate enough to have a PS/2 port (if I understood his description correctly) and uninstalled it. Thinking it may have been a mistake on his part he ran the Update again and uninstalled it again. WTF is Microshafting us doing?

I did a search about this and found that this has been happening since 2013 to some machines. WHY?

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: What are the symptoms

Didn't the Peugeot 504? require the engine to be removed so you could get to the battery? May not have been that one but I do remember it was a French car so I never bought any vehicle from that country.

Original WWII German message decrypts to go on display at National Museum of Computing

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Tommy Flowers

Then what were the ones that Churchill ordered to be destroyed and buried so their (the English of course and not the British) cypher breaking ability couldn't be discovered by the Soviets? Genuine question.

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Tommy Flowers

Are you referring to Coventry?

JJKing Bronze badge
Flame

Re: Tommy Flowers

Not quite correct there Scott. The Banking Royal Commission that was just held in Australia discovered the banks, and I assume via their computers, were charging dead people fees for services that they obviously weren't getting. One of those cheated had been dead for 13 years and the banks thinks they did nothing wrong. It was just a mistake apparently.

Clever girl: SpaceX's Mars-bound Raptor engine looks like it works just fine

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Are Nasa taking the piss?

I'm sorry but I can't let you can't do that Alister.

Microsoft Surface Pro 4 owners: So, about that other broken update…

JJKing Bronze badge
Coat

Explosively good pun Semtex.

What time do you exit the Comedy Hall, 1809 (military time).

Yes I know this is 4 months old but looking for info coz my daughter's Surface Pro 4 is having an Update issue. What a surprise.

Switch survives three hours of beer spray, fails after twelve

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Dogs.

I know it's been here about 3 years but this goes to prove my theory that it is better to be pissed off than pissed on.

I'm leaving now. I'll be back sometime in 2019.

UK spy overseer: Snooper's Charter cockups are still getting innocents arrested

JJKing Bronze badge
Megaphone

Cops; just a gang of thugs/bullies with a taxpayer supplied uniform.

One very important things to remember. When served with an illegal Search Warrant, make sure you are wearing your reading glasses and not your computer ones like I was.

I found an image of a naked male on a computer of a catholic primary school principal and so I reported it. I made a Ghost image of the HDD so there would be an "untouched copy" of the drive so investigators would not stuff up the timestamps of any remaining images on the machine. On Valentines Day 2008, I was hit with the search warrant so that day is now ruined and because of its prominence I find I am unable to forget this event. The warrant said they were looking for images of children though I am unable and at the time was unable to describe the image that I inadvertently opened. I subsequently gave a statement to the plods and thought that was the end of it until 14 February. The lead dick was an obnoxious little prick and even thought he was my lawyer saying I was free to leave my home but he advised me not to.

They were really unpleasant for about 45 minutes when their mood seemed to change but they spent the next 2½ hours searching or rather going through the motions. I did pretty pissed off when their software monkey attempted to break my new laptop coz he had no idea how to remove the battery. I was livid that the lead dick searched my 13 year old underwear drawer but he didn't make use of the female dick that came with them to do that. They bundled up a few of my IT items but left the 10 or so HDDs I had sitting on the bookcase in my office and left the digital camera with the memory card behind. I was told it would be 3 months before I got my gear back because the forensics department was backed up with work.

That all happened on a Tuesday. On Friday I rang them saying the battery on my iPAQ PDA needed charging because it has several thousand dollars with of invoicing hours that I couldn't afford to lose, was told the lead dick was on leave and was put through to a uniformed SGT who told me I could come and collect my gear on Monday. I guess they just took my gear to justify their great adventure. My daughter was scared and in tears because she thought they were going to take her computer away and she needed to do school work on it. I told her we would buy a new one and restore her backups so she applied some resistance by hiding her school USB stick on her person as a matter of defiance.

Like AC above, I got my desktop computer back and it never worked properly again. They really don't like bouncing around in the boot of a car with the only protection a paper bag. During their initial 45 minute mauling of my office they broke my colour laser printer, my portable DVD burner and damaged the hinge on my fairly new laptop. The screen would never sit properly upright ever again.

Cops, IMO, are just arseholes who don't want to find the truth but just want to find someone they can charge and have them found guilty even if they aren't. This is proven out by the above stories and the ones that make the news especially when evidence that could prove innocence is withheld, or damaging evidence magically appears or the pricks lie in the witness box especially when it contradicts their previous written statements and the judge allows the contradictions.

Furious Apple revokes Facebook's enty app cert after Zuck's crew abused it to slurp private data

JJKing Bronze badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Promise to do better

I wonder if the Winklevoss twins would have been as evil if they had managed to maintain ownership of their creation?

Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Even Paris is thinking deeply about my question. Deep in thought is not the only things she likes deep, eh Millsy

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Promise to do better

No, they should be destroyed by sharks with lasers that have been mutated to grow legs so the Zuck can't escape them by retreating to his stolen land on Hawaii.

Muhahahahahahaha (cough, cough, cough)

Seagate punts external PS4 drive at the millions who uninstalled their game libraries to fit Red Dead Redemption 2

JJKing Bronze badge
Megaphone

Re: What am I missing?

You have forgotten the 91,999,902 numpties out there who do not have a clue on how to do a simple process like that. As soon as you mention the word computer to them, their brain turns to mush irrespective of an IQ of a dead wombat or a Ph.D in rocket science.

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Replace it

And I for one would welcome our new data copying overlords...........oh wait, sorry, the meds haven't started working yet.

Straight outta Blighty: Readers, if you were a tech billionaire, what would you do?

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Dyson

Dyson is the only guy I know who makes a product that really doesn't suck.

It perplexes me that the ones who voted for Brexit are those that are either rapidly approaching pension age or are on it. The one who voted to stay seemed predominately the younger generations and with such a small turnout and a really small percentage to leave, this is a massive change that is going to affect so many people by such a small percentage getting it over the line. How many signed the petition within a week or two after the result and what was the most popular Google search after the result? Do nobody think the overly negative campaign to leave gave people an informed choice. I also find it interesting the oxygen thief Farage sat in the EU parliament collecting a salary while pushing his own agenda and not those of his nation. Isn't that treason?

Bit like the US where the fruitcake in charge got elected with 3 million fewer votes than the popular (and I use that word loosely here) candidate.

Remember Woolworths? Well there's a different* one that still exists in Oz. Telstra wants NBN Co to help shove fibre in it

JJKing Bronze badge
Flame

Will each store have to pay the $600 fee for a costing exercise?

Wow, an article about Woollies getting fibre connections but all we get so far are numpty commentards rabbiting on about the bloody name.

If NBN are going to run the fibre, I hope the $600 application fee has to be paid by each of the stores that didn't have the fibre lottery win pass by their front door.

Ooh, my machine is SO much faster than yours... Oh, wait, that might be a bit of a problem...

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

The customer had purchased a 286 or 386 (can't remember which) but had those stupid cases with the TURBO button and the LED display that showed the SPEED. He brought the machine back to the shop because it wasn't running at the fastest speed according to the display. No amount of explaining would convince him the button did nothing on this motherboard so it was find the "manual" for the case so the speed could be set correctly. In order to make him happy after his complaining, his machine even got a speed boost according to the display.

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: Time machine

Don't forget that WFW 3.11 (hope I remembered the version correctly) could have TCP/IP installed on it.

JJKing Bronze badge
Devil

Re: Cat-5?

Worked casual for a computer store who had installed 40MB HDDs partitioned to 32MB due to DOS 3.1 limitation. MS DOS 4.01 arrived on the scene and he mailed (NOTE, not emailed) out letters to all customers who had the 32MB HDD a cheap Upgrade to 40MB drive. As you have likely guessed, the Spawn of Satan just backed up their data then installed MS DOS 4.01, ran fdisk, removed the partition so the customer had their 32MB HDD replaced with a 40MB drive. At the time the drives were costing AUD$10 per MB so "getting" a 40MB drive for whatever he charged ($50 or $100) was a "bloody bargain mate" and he got to "keep" the old 32MB ones. His customers were so happy to get an extra 8MB and I just felt disgusted.

JJKing Bronze badge
Facepalm

1999 and a very large state-wide school IT rollout. In one middle size school (350 students) that was really struggling with and for hardware, the librarian went and had a 21" CRT monitor purchased for her use. The library software was written for 640 x 480 but could be run 800 x 600. Maybe she just wanted to keep the library warm during the winter but those monsters were so damned expensive then. I thought it was just a massive waste of $$$. Unfortunately it wasn't the last time I thought that and it wasn't the worst so I can only imagine some very pious non clergy catholic critters got some very nice backhanders.

JJKing Bronze badge

Re: @big_D

The Australian Council of Trade Unions were moving buildings circa 1998 and I was unlucky enough to be assigned the networking and hooking the machines up. One of the secretaries threw a hissy fit because she was getting a machine without a CD ROM drive in it. Ended up the second in command got the CD from his machine and had it put into hers and I bet it was never used.

The real funny part of this venture was the workers that were renovating and fitting out the building went on strike over something. Union HQ hit by a workers strike. The far cup of the hardware supplier was worth the agro just for the strike knowledge..........and you bastards still owe me $375. Pricks

Page:

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019