* Posts by Fungus Bob

1058 posts • joined 26 Jun 2014

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Big Falcon Namechange for Musk's rocket: BFR becomes Starship

Fungus Bob
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Re: Spacey McSpaceshipFace

Fartblaster Luna Smoothie?

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Wombats literally sh!t bricks – and now boffins reckon they know how

Fungus Bob
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Re: Kinda macabre, but alright

"If a car hit a wombat in Australia so fast that the wombat's body ended up in the USA, how fast was the car travelling?"

Fast enough to knock the shit out of a wombat and into a different time zone.

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Actually very interesting to some people...

Timmy B, you sure know your shit...

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Trump in Spaaaaaaace: Washington DC battles over who gets to decide the rules of trillion-dollar new industry

Fungus Bob
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Re: Commercial?

"I'll have some of what that guy is smokin'!"

From the look of it, he's probably smokin' motherboards...

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Russia: We did not hack the US Democrats. But if we did, we're immune from prosecution... lmao

Fungus Bob
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Still gotta have a Finnish dwarf with a toothbrush.

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Cheeky cheesemaker fails to copyright how things taste

Fungus Bob
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Re: @Charlie Clark

"we had to suffer red balls"

Your comment would be much more entertaining if this was all you wrote...

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OK Google, why was your web traffic hijacked and routed through China, Russia today?

Fungus Bob
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"I wonder why US telcos don't give a damn like that ?"

They don't care. They don't have to care - they're the phone company...

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Brit boffins build 'quantum compass'... say goodbye to those old GPS gizmos, possibly

Fungus Bob
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Re: It's not a compass.

"A surveying point in the home harbour, probably made of concrete, is difficult for the enemy to block or interfere with."

A torpedo could probably render it useless...

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Spammer scum hack 100,000 home routers via UPnP vulns to craft email-flinging botnet

Fungus Bob
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Re: wireless speakers

Proper speakers have wires.

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Dell upping its margins again: Precision 5530 laptop will sting you for $13m. Yep, six zeroes

Fungus Bob
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Re: It's an Apple move

Apple is for peasants!

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Bill Gates joined on stage by jar of poop as he confesses deep love for talking about toilets

Fungus Bob
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Re: Crap! Crap! Crap!

"De Turbolax, De Turbolax, De Turbolax,..." (?)

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We (may) now know the real reason for that IBM takeover. A distraction for Red Hat to axe KDE

Fungus Bob
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Re: KDE is really good now

"Akonadi is horrible and sucks up too many resources. Kill it with fire."

It's quicker and easier to install XFCE instead.

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'He must be stopped': Missouri candidate's children tell voters he's basically an asshat

Fungus Bob
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Re: "Hitler was right"

"er, he was actually right about a thing or two, you know..."

About what? Putting your pants on one leg at a time?

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Fungus Bob
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Don't be so sure. Missouri is the state where John Ashcroft lost to a dead guy.

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50 ways to leave your lover, but four to sniff browser history

Fungus Bob
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Re: run NoScript

"NoScript only works if the naughty script is served from a domain you don't care about. "

Then run no scripts....

I know, the web don't work then...

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Bomb squad descends on suspicious package to find something much more dangerous – a Journey cassette

Fungus Bob
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Re: Harmless

"I'd guess that most cars on the road have a tape player."

More importantly, cars have tires with which they can run over Journey tapes.

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Did they.....

There is only one Journey joke, the rest are true.

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Escalation

"Bill & Ted ... pah that's kid's stuff. it could have been "Ernest Saves Christmas"!"

Or "Pee Wee's Big Adventure".

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Escalation

"Instead of the usual bomb disposal expert they'd have used the bomb disposal evil robot?"

Should have used Justin Bieber.

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Manchester man fined £1,440 after neighbours couldn't open windows for stench of dog toffee

Fungus Bob
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Re: Had to think then

It's more fun if they doo...

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Had to think then

"The correct term is dog poo, the author must be American?"

Nope, we call 'em land mines over here.

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Official: IBM to gobble Red Hat for $34bn – yes, the enterprise Linux biz

Fungus Bob
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Re: So exactly how is IBM going to tame employees that are used to going to work in shorts...

I BM too but I don't brag about it.

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This two-year-old X.org give-me-root hole is so trivial to exploit, you can fit it in a single tweet

Fungus Bob
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Re: And this is news how?

"I prefer to boot into a console"

Ah. Slave to fashion, then...

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Science: Broke brats glued to the web while silk-stocking scions have better things to do

Fungus Bob
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Re: D'uh

"Next thing you'll tell me the pope is catholic..."

Actually he's a Wiccan.

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Buzzwords...

"So what's the next generation going to be called after Generation Z?"

I suggest you read "On Beyond Zebra!" by Dr. Seuss...

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Memo to Microsoft: Windows 10 is broken, and the fixes can't wait

Fungus Bob
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Re: QA Prestige

"Just had the 'pleasure' of setting up a Lubuntu system..."

Were you installing it on a TRS80?

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Insects with farts that smell like coriander assist in covering up Paris's aroma d'urine

Fungus Bob
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Paris Hilton

Paris is drenched in urine?!

I didn't know she was into that sort of thing...

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From dank memes to Krispy Kremes: British uni eggheads claim viral lol pics make kids fat

Fungus Bob
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Re: Ivy, Lux, Nick

Upvote for the Cramps reference.

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Chinese biz baron wants to shove his artificial moon where the sun doesn't shine – literally

Fungus Bob
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Re: Minions?

Would those be miniature onions?

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Chrome 70 flips switch on Progressive Web Apps in Windows 10 – with janky results

Fungus Bob
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Web apps that don't need an internet connection or visible browser window? Sounds like native apps to me.

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Google Cloud chief joins Saudi shindig exodus over journalist's worrying disappearance

Fungus Bob
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"I feel bad for normal Republicans - the level of stupidity coming out of the Orange One’s mouth and Twitter at any given time is massively embarrassing."

They made their bed, now they can soil it...

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Mobe networks battle to bring comms back after Hurricane Michael smashes US Gulf Coast

Fungus Bob
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Re: You'd think the Air Force would move the $150 million apiece fighters out of the storm's path

You're thinking like a normal person, try thinking like you are afflicted with military intelligence.

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It's the real Heart Bleed: Medtronic locks out vulnerable pacemaker programmer kit

Fungus Bob
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Facepalm

This Irish company is headquartered in the Twin Cities. Right in the middle of the North American continent.

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If you haven't already patched your MikroTik router for vulns, then if you could go do that, that would be greeeeaat

Fungus Bob
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Paris Hilton

Re: Router OS?

I wouldn't know about that, but "Miss, your earlobes resemble fish heads" sounds better in French...

Paris because, well... France...

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Microsoft yanks the document-destroying Windows 10 October 2018 Update

Fungus Bob
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Re: find out what the recovery process is going to be

"ctrl+alt+fuckit"

That would be to install the update...

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Apple macOS Mojave: There's goth mode but developers will have to wait for the juicy stuff

Fungus Bob
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Facepalm

Re: Piles is a great name

Only a mac user would request piles...

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Volkswagen links arms with Microsoft for data-slurping cloud on Azure

Fungus Bob
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Re: Carplay / Android Auto plus magic = profit!

Clippy is stupid - the tires rotate themselves when you drive...

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Carplay / Android Auto plus magic = profit!

I see a market opportunity for generic engine and transmission control computers that only talk to each other.

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New Zealand border cops warn travelers that without handing over electronic passwords 'You shall not pass!'

Fungus Bob
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Re: Mission Creep

"Narnia to Middle Earth perhaps?"

One does not simply walk into Mordor...

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Resident evil: Inside a UEFI rootkit used to spy on govts, made by you-know-who (hi, Russia)

Fungus Bob
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Re: Hardware button?

"Would this not thwart (almost) all malicious UEFI firmware images? "

Most people would eat shit sandwiches if a dialog box popped up on the screen and told them to.

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Fat chance: Cholesterol leads boffins to discover world's oldest animal fossil – 558m years old

Fungus Bob
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Re: Just one thing I don't understand...

"how the hell did he know where to look?"

It's sort of like gaydar.

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Fungus Bob
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Re: Just one thing I don't understand...

"why 'throw' them down?"

Because throwing up is not fun...

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Microsoft adds delayed gratification to the Surface Hub 2 line

Fungus Bob
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Need more differentiation

We have the 2S and the 2X, we need an economy model - the 2E, so we can combine them into the Surface 2SEX.

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Microsoft accidentally let encrypted Windows 10 out into the world

Fungus Bob
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Re: Or a complete fanatic of Redmond's greatest

In other words, a looney...

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Chromebooks gain faff-free access to Windows file shares via Samba

Fungus Bob
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Re: Dreadful names

Loogie

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Boffins bash Google Translate for sexism

Fungus Bob
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Devil

The Register asked Google for comment but we've not heard back.

Maybe you should run the question through Google Translate...

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Microsoft sharpens its claws to cut Outlook UI excess, snip Ribbon

Fungus Bob
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Re: UI revamp

No, the new latest k00l toy will be the salad bar - everything tossed together in random fashion.

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If you weren't rich enough to buy a Surface before, you may as well let that dream die

Fungus Bob
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Re: My heart is borken, I can't get a Surface on tick...

" boo hoo, what will I do?"

Live a frustration-free life....

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You can buy Cisco CEO Chuck Robbins' mansion for a cool $13m

Fungus Bob
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Re: Bet it's Netgear

Belkin

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