* Posts by Fungus Bob

859 posts • joined 26 Jun 2014

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We're calling it now: FCC votes 2-1 to rip up net neutrality on Thurs

Fungus Bob

Eeejit Pi because his IQ is 3.14...

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Verizon is gonna axe its 'unlimited' data hogs

Fungus Bob

Re: @art guerrilla

"funny, you can tell who are the 'merikans are who actually DEFENDING doublespeak,"

What fantastical data do you have to support this assumption?

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Renault goes open source with next-gen electric buggy you might generously call 'a car'

Fungus Bob
Devil

Re: Where does the dog go?

He pees on the wheels like he does with every other car.

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Too much landfill, too little purpose: CES 2017

Fungus Bob
Thumb Up

Re: Who shit in your cereal?

Perhaps Time Lords shit dark matter like the Nibblonians of Futurama....

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Internet of Sh*t has an early 2017 winner – a 'smart' Wi-Fi hairbrush

Fungus Bob
Thumb Up

Re: Incredible (Talking Toilet Paper!!)

""EEEWWW!!! What are you DOING to me?!?"

Could make toilet training more fun for the young 'uns...

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How Rogue One's Imperial stormtroopers SAVED Star Wars and restored order

Fungus Bob

Re: stormtroopers being fodder

"Still doesn't explain how your galaxy-conquering army with space age armor and blasters can get beaten by stone-age teddy bears"

Because teddy bears are so CUUUUTE!

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Stupid law of the week: South Carolina wants anti-porno chips in PCs that cost $20 to disable

Fungus Bob
WTF?

Re: More Magic Technology

"How would such a device differentiate between naked flesh in say an orgy, and the acres of bare flesh in an average American's holiday photos?"

Why would you want it to?

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European Patent Office supremo rapped on knuckles by nation reps

Fungus Bob
Devil

Re: "Limit his tendencies"?

I think you mean "wee peasants"...

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MPs suggest introducing web blocking to tackle suicide rates in UK

Fungus Bob

The Chappaquiddick incident?

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Sexbots could ‘over-exert’ their human lovers, academic warns

Fungus Bob

What I want to know is why academics are spending so much time thinkin' 'bout sex robots.

On second thought, no, I don't. Really. Ignorance is bliss.

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View from a Reg reader: My take on the Basic Income

Fungus Bob

Re: Can't you find a different forum?

Because the whole idea of UBI is to solve the problem of what to do with all the permanently displaced workers when they are replaced by robots. Whether or not this will be an actual problem is a matter of some debate but this is a case of technology and politics colliding.

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Meat pies in SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE!

Fungus Bob

With apologies to The Alan Parsons Project

I am the pie in the sky

Frozen for you....

(it's up to someone else to come up with the next line)

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Disney sued in race row: Axed IT workers claim jobs went to H-1B hires

Fungus Bob

Re: Disney is depicable

"I was under the impression that the American Way was to make lots of money and screw anyone who gets in your way."

No, the American Way was something Superman fought to protect in the 1950's. America lost it's Way some time ago.

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Rogue One: This is the Star Wars back story you've been looking for

Fungus Bob
Headmaster

Re: Tape?

"punched space-cards"

Shouldn't that be "space-punched space-cards"?

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'Emoji translator' sought by translations firm

Fungus Bob

Re: Sometimes I despair...

Don't despair, Buddy Jesus loves you.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/93/Buddy_christ.jpg

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Men! If you want to win at board games this Christmas, turn off the rock music – scientists

Fungus Bob

Re: helluva hangover

Ah, the other players got the intellectual victory...

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Icelandic Pirate Party sails away from attempt to form government

Fungus Bob

Re: Trade?

Needs more cowbell!

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Guess King Battistelli's plan to fix the Euro Patent Office. Yep, give himself more power

Fungus Bob
Coat

Re: Ways to get rid of him

"Voting to fire the head of an international organisation is likely to result in a lot of shenanigans in terms of who gets to replace the fired person"

Since he's French, why not let them decide. The worst they could do is replace him with their favorite comic genius - Jerry Lewis.

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Earth days are getting longer – by 1.8 milliseconds per century

Fungus Bob
Boffin

Re: I blame global warming and CO2

No, it's mountains - they have shitloads of aerodynamic drag.

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China is building a full scale replica of the Titanic to repeatedly crash into iceberg

Fungus Bob

Re: Next ChineseTheme Parks:

The Death of Bonnie and Clyde

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Privacy is theft! Dave Eggers' big-screen takedown of Google and Facebook emerges

Fungus Bob

Re: "an amalgamation of Google and Facebook"

FaceGoo

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Elon Musk-backed OpenAI reveals Universe – a universal training ground for computers

Fungus Bob

Re: Hoping to teach AI agents the common sense they need...

"Can you define common sense? We gotta define it before we can teach it.

Or, do we...?"

If you had common sense, you'd know...

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Fungus Bob

Hoping to teach AI agents the common sense they need...

If we can't teach ourselves common sense what makes these nuts think they can teach it to other fake intelligent beings?

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Cyanogen parts ways with its founder

Fungus Bob
Boffin

>"improve the communication and performance of the team"

>Not sure how getting rid of some of them improves that...

They were Kinks in the Hose of Progress.

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US election pollsters weren't (very) wrong – statistically speaking

Fungus Bob

Re: Mandatory Voting

"The Electoral College system exists because the individual states fiercely protect their own rights and small states fear their opinion would count for less in a popular vote system.

And there's the issue than comes up every four years."

The Electoral College does one other thing that no one has mentioned yet - it provides a clear, definite result and saves us from months of tedious recounts and legal challenges like we had in Minnesota when Norm Coleman and Al Franken each got 40% of the vote for the US Senate. After 4 months of recounts and legal crap proving both candidates were shit, the real winner was Norm Coleman who got to fade into obscurity while Al Franken got a job where 60% of the voting public did not like him.

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Fatal flaws in ten pacemakers make for Denial of Life attacks

Fungus Bob

Re: Need a sense of proportion

"To summarise a technically sophisticated attacker can cause serious consequences possibly death to a patient up to 5 metres away."

Given that pacemakers are completely enclosed in a meatbag during normal operation, the actual range may be a bit less.

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Woman rescues red pepper Donald Trump from vegetarian chilli

Fungus Bob

THESE DAMNED VEGGIE-ARYANS MUST BE STOPPED!

Effing Plant Supremacists! There oughtta be a law.

What's that? Oh, alright. :(

My wife says I hafta put the luminum foil back on my head and go sit in the corner...

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Eugene Kaspersky is now personally defending your feet

Fungus Bob
Coat

It's OK - Eugene Kapersky is a real fun guy.

Mine's the one with fast actin' Tinactin in the pocket...

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Has Canadian justice gone too far? Cops punish drunk drivers with NICKELBACK

Fungus Bob

Re: I have to be a weirdo then

My brain hurts. I need a drink.

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Fungus Bob

Re: What if...

Kenny G

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Fungus Bob

Re: I have to be a weirdo then

What about other beverages? Does rum make you 19% less sad, for example? Do fruit smoothies make you long for death?

Enquiring minds want to know.

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Jeremy Hunt: Telcos must block teens from sexting each other

Fungus Bob

Re: What planet do these people live on?

"How can you take on a position of power/responsibility and not have a clue about how the modern world around you actually works?"

Haven't you heard? Facts don't matter.

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Twitter bans own CEO Jack Dorsey from Twitter

Fungus Bob

Re: "what's next, Larry Page reduced to using Bing?"

Followed by SatNad using an Amazon Echo because Cortana is having a torrid affair with Clippy.

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Google declares victory for its Wifi router before it's even shipped

Fungus Bob

Re: Take with a grain of salt.

"I also wonder if I am the only one to pronounce it "Whiffy""

Yes. If Fifi is pronounced "Feefee" then this should shirley be pronounced "Weefee"....

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Microsoft promises 'equal access' to LinkedIn to get EC green light for acquisition

Fungus Bob
Trollface

Re: Microstiffed...

"You could end up working for a manager "

Everybody ends up working for a manager...

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Emulating x86: Microsoft builds granny flat into Windows 10

Fungus Bob
Windows

Re: This is probably...

"What the FCUK is this useful for?"

Running Outlook real slow on your phone.

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NASA trying to rein in next-generation super-heavy lifter costs

Fungus Bob
Devil

Re: James Hansen will be furious

"do you think throwing IT geeks into volcanoes will appease the gods?"

What could possibly go Wrong?

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Fungus Bob
Devil

Re: James Hansen will be furious

"Let's leave it to the "enlightened" supporters of stone-age superstitions to tell us once again that every natural, and unnatural disaster was caused by sinners, gays, and children who don't go to bed when their parents tell them to."

Because they're wrong. Just plain wrong. Everyone knows the real reason for every natural and unnatural disaster is not enough virgins to throw into the volcanoes!

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D-Link joins hands with Microsoft to give 'Super Wi-Fi' a push

Fungus Bob
Trollface

Soup or Wi-Fi?

I'll have the soup...

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Forget 'shadow IT' – it's 'self-starting IT' now

Fungus Bob

Re: "Nonprofit IT"

How about NonprofIT...

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User needed 40-minute lesson in turning it off and turning it on again

Fungus Bob

Re: Can you hold down the power button

"> You've told people not to use jargon, but I have no idea whatsoever what 'top-up the jets' means*.

I'd hazard a guess he's American and means topping up the screenwash, but it is only a guess."

I'm an American and I, too, have no idea what 'top up the jets' means. Perhaps he's Canadian...

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NASA discovers mysterious super-fast electrons whizzing above Earth

Fungus Bob
Coat

we’re seeing energetic electrons where we don’t think they should be

Maybe Red Bull gave them wings...

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Martian 'ice cauldrons' are prime spot to hunt LGMs, say boffins

Fungus Bob
Alien

Re: LGMs?

That would be Local Government Morons...

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Pythons Idle and Cleese pen anti-selfie screed

Fungus Bob

Re: Shouting at clouds

" And another thing, where are my slippers"

You left 'em on your selfie stick.

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A cardboard desk? I won’t stand for it (actually I will)

Fungus Bob

Re: gnome dancing around the aforementioned Stonehenge

Digital Virgin Dispenser

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Kotkin: Why Trump won

Fungus Bob
Trollface

Re: would California be wanting to leave the US?

Perhaps they'd like to go back to Mexico....

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How could things get worse for Samsung? Glad you asked

Fungus Bob

Re: Exploding Washing Machines

"What else do they make that explodes?"

PR...

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Ireland to fight against billing Apple for back-taxes

Fungus Bob

"There are some bloody idiots running countries these days."

This is not a new thing.

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IoT is more than vapourware, insists GSMA

Fungus Bob

Yes, its fucking stoopid.

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