* Posts by J. Cook

793 posts • joined 16 Jul 2007

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Microsoft sysadmin hired for fake NetWare skills keeps job despite twitchy trigger finger

J. Cook
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I still get the odd email for level one gruntwork from the last agency I toyed around with some four years ago. I dropped like a hot rock when I found out that they were speaking with the boss I was trying to get away from, AND they were also pulling the same shenanigans mentioned by previous commenters. (at one point I went to their office to interview for a SQL admin position, and they asked me to lie through my teeth about my experience; I didn't, the guy thanked me for being honest, I apologized for wasting his time, and that was that.

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Another 3D printer? Oh, stop it, you're killing us. Perhaps literally: Fears over ultrafine dust

J. Cook
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Coat

Remember, life will kill you in the end.

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'Frontline workers' of the world, unite! And grab yourselves a Surface Go White Van Man edition

J. Cook
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: I think...

Well, the "FREE CANDY" sign painted on the side didn't work...

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Monster mash: Spectra Logic's tape library now twice the beast it was

J. Cook
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Tape is not dead....

... although it's moved positions here at [RedactedCo] from backup to archive.

Admittedly, we are looking at one of SpectraLogic's smaller offerings to replace our aging and out of support library, but not this kaiju of a setup.

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Windows XP? Pfff! Parts of the Royal Navy are running Win ME

J. Cook
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Re: Few comments

IDE to compact flash converters; unless the software does Stupid Controller Tricks with the drive itself, that's the easiest way around that issue. the real trick is finding good quality CF cards that small now...

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J. Cook
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Pint

@simonlb: *groans*

It's not pub-o-clock here... yet. Two more hours.

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Bill Gates joined on stage by jar of poop as he confesses deep love for talking about toilets

J. Cook
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the poo puns have bowled over this powerfully painful and potent punster.

Either that, or I'm taking the piss.

don't forget to wipe!

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iPhone XR, for when £1,000 is just too much for a smartmobe

J. Cook
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Paris Hilton

Off topic...

Note sure if this has been discussed elsewhere or not, but if that an actual taxidermied vulture, a still breathing one, or a very good replica?

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Commvault revenues grow – but only just – as it switches to subscription pricing

J. Cook
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I can tell you that the middlemen don't like the subscription model either. This whole thing of "we must keep increasing our sales every quarter" is a fantasy, and it not sustainable.

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Clunk, bang, rattle: Is that a ghost inside your machine?

J. Cook
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Re: toner powder

@Evil Auditor:

Ex-Janitor here. the men's room was messy in the usual manner (discoloration by the urinals, the occasional crap cleanup from a drunk/high person who missed the toilet, etc.) but good bog the messes in the ladies room on occasion.. Ugh.

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PortSmash attack blasts hole in Intel's Hyper-Threading CPUs, leaves with secret crypto keys

J. Cook
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Boffin

To pull off this secret surveillance, the exploit code must run on the system under attack, specifically on the same CPU core as the process you want to pry into. That means it can't be used to eavesdrop on software remotely, or easily on the same host, but it could be useful for determined miscreants and snoops who have managed to infiltrate someone else's computer. You basically have to already be able to run your own evil code on a machine in order to PortSmash it.

Well, if someone's gotten that far to be able to run code on your machine, then it's not really your machine at that point. Just sayin'...

on the flip side, I can see this as a legitimate problem for web hosting/cloud computing companies that cram as many instances on a box that it will handle...

Just saying.

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Bird, Lime, and Xiaomi face scooter sueball

J. Cook
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The 'dockless' bikes are also not immune to this problem; oFo, Lime, and at least one other company have put their bikes in my local city, and It's not uncommon to see them just sitting off the side, knocked over, or seeing the local miscreants re-paint them. There was one dumped at my house (I live on a corner) one fine evening in my driveway; one of the handlebars was broken off (no mean feat), and the thing was just ditched. I've also seen one that has the wheels missing and is sitting in an alleyway.

The scooters have been showing up in my locality as well; I have a feeling the same thing will happen as with the bikes.

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Yes, Americans, you can break anti-piracy DRM if you want to repair some of your kit – US govt

J. Cook
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onefang wrote:

Last time I repaired some hardware, I did just remove the faulty capacitor and replace it with a new one. A lot cheaper than buying a new monitor, or getting an authorised board swap.

+1.

A friend I know was one of the few people in my area that would undertake board level repairs for some things like re-capping boards, replacing broken power connectors, etc. he's also re-built LCD screens entirely, although that's a very tricky thing (mostly to replace the backlight tube on pre-led screens), and he gave that up because it was so fiddly.

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Erm... what did you say again, dear reader?

J. Cook
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Re: Flame of the week?

Yeah. There were NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK in the rant and anti-obama/democrat/leftist boogeyman in the rant to implicate that he was the author.

It's also possible that it was a master-class troll...

*dons nomex suit and runs to the fire extinguisher storage bay*

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Worrying Windows 10 wrecking-ball weapon weirdly wanders wildly on worldwide web

J. Cook
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Re: Ever-morphing killer bug more persistent than an Xenomorph in a Space Trucker cargo ship

Also, a track record of releasing bugs in their flagship OS bad enough to make square pigs look appetizing.

Mine's not the company driver suit.

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It only took Oz govt transformation bods 6 months and $700k to report that blockchain ain't worth the effort

J. Cook
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Actually there is a use of blockchain. It is a distributed consensus algorithm (or, in other words, totally ordered broadcast protocol) which happens to be also resilient against Byzantine failures, unlike other consensus algorithms like Paxos, Raft etc.

Yes and agreed; however the report was largely shooting down "we put blockchain in [totally not appropriate usage]!" claims.

It's a little expensive, but I still think it's a valid use of the funds.

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Memo to Microsoft: Windows 10 is broken, and the fixes can't wait

J. Cook
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Joke

But Andrew: Tell us how that makes you feel. :D

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J. Cook
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Replace outlook!

Along with Exchange, although I know there's at least one or two 3rd party apps that might give it a valid run for the money.

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Can't get pranked by your team if nobody in the world can log on

J. Cook
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The ISP I used to work at had a majority of the workstations on the outside of the corporate firewall. You learned very quickly to lock your workstation, lest your home page get changed to something decidedly not safe for work.

We pranked one co-workers by making up an ethernet loopback plug and sent his workstation's packets back to him- he was.. not amused.

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J. Cook
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@anon, re Monitor rotation...

... My experience with it has always been the video driver itself, not the OS. It was Intel that decided to add the hot keys and turn them on by default.

Good prank, though.

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Core-blimey! Riddle of Earth's mysterious center finally 'solved' by smarty seismologists

J. Cook
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Joke

Re: So it's...

"Churches! Churches! Lead! Lead!

A DUCK! " *gasps*

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RIP Paul Allen: Microsoft cofounder billionaire dies at 65 after facing third bout with cancer

J. Cook
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I dunno about that; After seeing various cancers take away family members, I wouldn't want that fate on my enemies.

I have nothing bad or good to say about Mr. Allen, so I will simply wish for peace on his surviving family.

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HP Ink CEO: That $550m Apogee buy was to stop rivals slurping it

J. Cook
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Re: Still miss my 4MV + mods ...

I might have to argue with you about the 4MV- the engine was a bit of a diva at times, and finicky to repair and maintain.

the 1055CM? beautiful machine.

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Powerful forces, bodily fluids – it's all in a day's work

J. Cook
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Alert

Gods yes. When I worked as a field repair monkey, the shop I worked for also accepted people bringing their own machines in, and also did some third party warranty service. We got a machine in one fine day that reeked of cigarette smoke- the owners were apparently each had a carton a day habit, and the machine was a complete write off. the third party warranty service wouldn't touch it, and (naturally) the customers threw a fit when we told them. The shop smelled like an ash tray for a week after the machine left the building.

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J. Cook
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Re: Shrapnel...

No, it's a management "I'm not buying a case that costs three times what the computer costs!" decision that ends up with them replacing the computer enough times to make the case a cost effective repair.

I did a contract job back when Code Red and Nimda where the scary monsters of the week, and got a tour of the local aerospace plant when the place had those two bugs burn through their network. We had to have the on-site tech visit most of the machines in the manufacturing area because the Cd drives were trashed from all the titanium and other metal dust, because they were not in a good enclosure. (tl;dr- a milling machine that carves turbine parts out of blocks of titanium costing more than a Cadillac is dead-lined because the ~$30 Cd rom drive in the ~$700 desktop can't install patches and is therefore excluded from the network and the ability to do.. anything.)

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J. Cook
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Go

Re: Monitor

I've had (very low end) video cards pull that stunt on me as well; not a problem with memory, or the GPU, but the analog circuitry pushing the signal out the VGA cable had gone far enough out of spec that it showed up as a major color distortion on the monitor. (this was after swapping the damn CRT, obviously.)

There was also the time that some gorilla in a telco office managed to plug in a juniper line card upside down and forced it in; trashed a line card costing over 120K and badly damaged the backplane on the router chassis as well. (which was another 50K easily) My boss at the time was Not Amused.

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Scanning an Exchange server for a virus that spreads via email? What could go wrong?

J. Cook
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Re: Thing of the past, thank god! -users just do not get why you need to limit their mail to 2Gb

My direct manager two bosses back (aka 'Turkey', whom I've ranted about before) burned his ~2 GB quota within three months of starting, because he didn't delete anything at all, and wanted to be on *every* group and list the rest of the team had, including some extremely chatty groups. (I've been here at [RedactedCo] for ~12 years and I've only gotten quota warnings once.)

Fortunately, most of our users are reasonably decent about archiving old emails, and the few that actually do need open quotas are high enough up in the food chain that they get it. (especially the one that signs the paychecks, who is also the biggest space offender. :) )

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Convenient switch hides an inconvenient truth

J. Cook
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Pint

An anonymous Coward wrote:

thought it was funny, for the people who thought it didn't pass the bar, c'mon they're all good stories, let's not set the bar too high or people will maybe think twice about writing theirs for fear of being 'not good enough'

It's tricky to set the bar at just the right height- too low, and people step over it. Too high, and you hit their kidneys instead of the groin. /rimshot

*wanders off to start a week off early*

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J. Cook
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Re: Barrel Bottoms

... I have a t-shirt that one of our vendors was giving away at a conference that says "I'm here because YOU broke something." I wear it when I get called into the office on off-hours. :)

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You dirty DRAC: IT bods uncover Dell server firmware security slip

J. Cook
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Thumb Up

Indeed; there have been more than a few stories published on this site about rouge sysadmins screwing over their former employers after getting walked out the door for whatever reason (usually things that would have been major "DO NOT HIRE" flags, or things that could have been corrected early before they were allowed to fester).

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Fortnite 'fesses up: New female character's jiggly bits 'unintended' and 'embarrassing'

J. Cook
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Coat

I have bits that go wibble wobble...

both attached to my chest, and crotch. (mildly overweight bloke here.)

*gets prodded towards the door* OW! I'm going, I'm going!

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TLS proxies? Nah. Truthfully Less Secure 'n' poxy, say Canadian infosec researchers

J. Cook
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Re: Unfortunately, there can be some good reasons for this.

Do you honestly believe that nation states are the only ones who MitM? The hardware to MitM an open WiFi access point is in the order of $100-$200, complete with YouTube instructions.

Yep. There's even a commercial product that does it. (WiFi Pineapple)

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Attempt to clean up tech area has shocking effect on kit

J. Cook
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Pint

Re: Not everybody appreciates the cleaners - especially robot ones !

Paging Admiral Stabby to the port side airlock. Admiral Stabby, please make your way to the port side airlock.

(Yes, there is an entire set of posts on Tumblr about the adventures of Stabby, who started out as an enlisted robot and worked it's way up to admiral by several heroic (and hilarious) feats.)

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Facebook: Up to 90 million addicts' accounts slurped by hackers, no thanks to crappy code

J. Cook
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... and that's why I call it failbook. Absolutely no surprise here.

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Salesforce dogged by protests, leaked emails, and guerrilla blimps on first day of Dreamforce

J. Cook
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Go

Re: Wait, what? Did I miss something?

At this point Babymetal are considerably more metal than Metallica

THIS. SO VERY MUCH THIS.

(for the uninitiated, imagine a girl's J-pop band getting into a tryst with the likes of oh, say, White Zombie, or Megadeth, or similar. Babymetal would be the love child born of that tryst.

(and they are damned good.)

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The 2018 ThinkPad X1 Yoga: A bendy-legged workhorse walks into a meeting

J. Cook
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... I'll keep my "suspend to disk" (aka hibernate) thankyouverymuch.

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Eat my shorts, watchdog tells every city mayor in the US – FCC approves $2bn 5G telco windfall

J. Cook
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Re: Just an attempt...

You are anthony ray and I claim my nickel. :D

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J. Cook
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Boffin

Re: Is anyone surprised?

Yes. Unlike my fellow USAians, I do know a bit about our country's storied history (both good and bad- We've done some pretty monstrous things in the past and continue to do so), but felt that the slavery angle wasn't quite relevant to the discussion.

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J. Cook
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Re: Is anyone surprised?

Hello bevy of lawsuits.

Lawsuits? I seem to recall that there was a war over this topic (State's rights) some decades back.

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Amid Trump-China tariff tiff, Cisco kit prices to resellers soar up to 25%

J. Cook
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@Alan Brown

Trump isn't the first of his type, nor even the most original liar

One thing is certain: he sure is loud and annoying.

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Secret IBM script could have prevented 11-hour US tax day outage

J. Cook
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Ah, my tax dollars hard at 'work'. *sighs*

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Baddies just need one email account with clout to unleash phishing hell

J. Cook
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Boffin

2FA won't save you, nor will Cloud services...

For now, the only alternative is layers of unpopular and expensive authentication to protect accounts or signing up for Office 365...

The past couple spear phishing attempts we've seen at [RedactedCo] came from O365 clients and compromised accounts.

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A basement of broken kit, zero budget – now get the team running

J. Cook
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Re: Not me, but ...

It turns out that he deprived some VPs of the coke and hookers that go with new equipment purchases and construction contracts.

That explains why the electric bills keep going up every year. Hookers ain't cheap. :D

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Russia: The hole in the ISS Soyuz lifeboat – was it the crew wot dunnit?

J. Cook
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Devil

Re: I still think it was done by a Russian technician

@bombastic bob: I am in (rare) agreement with you. (On a side note, I think I saw a crate or two of wolly underthings addressed to hell over in the shipping department. :) )

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Seagate passes gassy 14TB whopper: He He He, one for each of you

J. Cook
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Boffin

Re: Secure erase

The "Secure Erase" leverages the on-controller encryption of drives that are compliant with the ATA6 command set (SATA and (IIRC) Ultra-ATA100/133 IDE drives), which is also why it's a 20 second drive wipe instead of a physical overwrite- the data is stored encrypted, and the secure erase command tells the drive controller to generate a new key which renders the bits on the platters into garbage, because you can't recover the encryption key.

The ATA controller has to support allowing the command (a great many don't!), and older drives don't understand the command anyway, so for wiping drives I usually go with my old standby of a 4 or 5 pass random fill with DBAN and a blanking pass at the end; (although even that's overkill; a single random pass and blanking ought to be fine for 95% of purposes. If you are paranoid, you should probably shred the drive anyway, which I generally prefer a trip to an underpopulated area with a nice backstop, and populate the drive with a series of dents and holes from rifles and other firearms. :) )

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J. Cook
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Coat

Was I the only one to get the sub-text?

Although considering my sense of humor is still firmly stuck in the 'toilet joke' era of maturity (I've _heard of it!), all I saw from the head line, byline, and closing comments were flatus jokes. :)

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You know all those movies you bought from Apple? Um, well, think different: You didn't

J. Cook
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Re: File sizes

Word of advice: use a pre-paid visa/mastercard/etc. when purchasing MakeMKV; I suspect that their payment processor might have gotten loose with card numbers, as about a month after I purchased it, there was a fradulent charge on that card I used to purchase my copy with.

Otherwise, it's a fantastic application for ripping Blu-rays.

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Dust off that old Pentium, Linux fans: It's Elive

J. Cook
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Re: If it's snappy on old kit...

@Peter Gathercole

Don't forget, the stock amiga had those custom chips in them which helped a lot with graphics operations back in the day.

I had the pleasure of getting an old A500 with multiple floppy drives back up and running for the owner; I was surprised the disks were still good, let along the drives.

Getting the IIgs I have back into operation, that's going to be tricky as a) It didn't come with an ADB keyboard or mouse (or 3.5" drives, and b) the gits on fleabay want FAR too much money for parts in even crummy shape. ("It's VINTAGE! We can charge $stupid for it and some schmuck will buy it!") Fortunately, there's a guy making modern bridge hardware for the input devices, and a plug-in box that'll emulate every drive ever made for that platform, and access disk images on an SD card.

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Defense Distributed starts selling gun CAD files amid court drama

J. Cook
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Childcatcher

Re: No, this has nothing to do with the US First Amendment, freedom of speech

It's this simple: If anyone wants to provide a potentially lethal ANYTHING to anybody in the USA by ANY means, then that thing is subject to the law, be they local, state or federal. That is all. This issue will be sorted out at those levels, not at the level of the US Constitution.

...So does this mean that we have to fill out a crap-load of paperwork for such things as:

A shovel (https://abc13.com/man-beaten-with-shovel-while-he-slept-has-died/3432807/ , auto-playing video)

A kitchen knife (oh wait, that's also illegal in the UK.)

A screwdriver (Not the alcoholic kind, either)

A crowbar (Paging Gordon Freeman to the white telephone), especially beefy ones)

Just saying.

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J. Cook
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Re: Cute, but not for long

@ Anon, re: AR-15 lowers

The lower receiver houses the fire control group (trigger assembly), magazine well, grip, and stock. the Upper receiver is what handles all the pressure, and what the barrel fits into. (most people building an AR rifle buy completed, barreled upper assemblies, IIRC.)

While I didn't build my own AR style rifle, I did assemble one from parts purchased from a couple sources, including a 'stripped' lower receiver (which had to go through the same channels as if I was buying a fully completed, functional firearm) from a reputable manufacturer.

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