* Posts by Oh Homer

1040 posts • joined 18 Oct 2013

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App-y, app-y, joy, joy: Pain-free software installer Flatpak (kinda) works on Windows Subsystem for Linux

Oh Homer
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Re: "pulse audio died a horrible death in the 4.4 kernel"

Actually that was OSS not PulseAudio, the latter of which has never actually been in the kernel (since it's not a hardware driver, it's a sound server that merely processes output from drivers), and the former has in fact been disabled by default for years.

Personally I just use ALSA with a simple asoundrc config that gives me access to the hardware DSP and equaliser, something I was never able to figure out with pulseaudio. If I can remember that far back, I'm pretty sure this was trivial to do with OSS too, before it jumped the shark by going proprietary and everyone abandoned it.

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Oh Homer
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Trollface

Pulseaudio not present on WSL

Finally a good reason to switch to Windows.

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Microsoft pulls plug on IPv6-only Wi-Fi network over borked VPN fears

Oh Homer
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Paris Hilton

Catch 22

1. Nobody uses IPv6 because nobody supports IPv6

2. Nobody supports IPv6 because nobody uses IPv6

3. Goto 1

Seems like we need a compelling reason to switch, some dire emergency, such as running out of IPv4 addresses, for example.

Oh wait...

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Linux kernel's Torvalds: 'I am truly sorry' for my 'unprofessional' rants, I need a break to get help

Oh Homer
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Meh

Re: That's right Linux community... bend over...

Meh, there was a time that I'd have been deeply offended by that sort of comment, but actually I'm now at the stage where I too am sick of PC culture, and that's coming from a proud socialist who believes in equality above all.

I think I'd have used the "Stasi" analogy rather than "Gulag", though, which makes more sense. Or better yet, "thought crime". There comes a point where the pursuit of fairness actually crosses the line and becomes, ironically, unfair, due to overcompensation. And PC culture today is unquestionably overzealous, in my opinion. But it's difficult to be too critical of something that was initially justified and started out with good intentions.

It sorely needs to be tempered with some common sense, though. The fact is that we absolutely need the explosive Linus Torvalds' and Gordon Ramsay's of this world, without whom we'd be a much poorer society, in the important cultural sense. You need to balance equality against mediocrity, or else the whole point of equality becomes meaningless.

I guess I'm just becoming more centrist and less socialist in my old age. I suppose it's the inevitable consequence of hindsight.

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You know all those movies you bought from Apple? Um, well, think different: You didn't

Oh Homer
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Re: "BluRay player is not connected to the Internet"

The Blu-Ray standard mandates that players must support key revocation from disc, and new movies not only add new keys but revoke old ones ... automatically and without recourse. So even if your machine never connects to the internet, you can lose the ability to play older titles, unless you avoid ever playing any new titles.

A safer bet is to always rip your Blu-Rays with something like AnyDVD HD, then store the rips on a media server like Kodi, thus avoiding the whole DRM debacle altogether.

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Oh Homer
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Pirate

Do the right thing

I don't exactly consider myself a career criminal or a cheapskate - I spend vast amounts on tech - but at the end of the day when the industry at large is screwing you, it's hard to have any qualms about screwing it back.

So my attitude is that, as far as I'm concerned, I'll only pay for Content® (love how they capitalise that, BTW) that I feel really deserves it, and "pirate" everything else, basically on a try-before-I-buy basis.

Let's be honest, 99% of the Content® out there is utter garbage anyway, entirely unworthy of your hard-earned readies, and even the remaining 1% is grossly overvalued IMO.

But no matter what I buy or how I obtain it, I always make sure I have a DRM-free local copy to keep and use forever, and frankly to hell with anyone who objects to that. It's hard to have any sympathy for a bunch of billionaire con artists who rip you off with bait-and-switch and double - nay multiple - dipping scams, where they gleefully take your money over and over again for exactly the same Content®, but leave you holding a big bag o' nothing.

Under the circumstance, my conscience is clear.

I look forward to the day that the likes of the Federation Against Copyright Theft add these bait-and-switch Content® stories to its propaganda material - you know, for balance.

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Seagate passes gassy 14TB whopper: He He He, one for each of you

Oh Homer
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Re: "real SCSI or SAS"

Well, first of all, even finding an SAS drive these days is like trying to buy a floppy drive, unless you happen to work in a data centre (which I don't), and I'd imagine that even they have a hard time finding any. Surely they're all using SSDs by now anyway, if for no better reason than to drastically reduce power consumption and thus costs. I dread to think of the power bill for a data centre filled with 15k drives in 2018.

Second, the few SAS drives I actually managed to find at retail all looked rather elderly, meaning they use older and much slower technology, and were ridiculously expensive. Did I mention that I can't afford expensive storage?

Third, NVMe M.2 utterly destroys SAS in both speed and price, and also unlike SAS is readily available.

As for tech wearing out... welcome to the 21st century. Nobody cares. People now regard tech like polystyrene cups. It has to be as near to free as possible, and just barely good enough to get the job done to the required specifications (i.e. fast), before chucking it in the bin and starting again with a new cup.

It's sad but true, and the rationale should be self-evident: in this era of austerity nobody can afford the luxury of genuinely high grade products, and getting things done quickly and cheaply is simply an unavoidable necessity.

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Oh Homer
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Meh

Nice, but...

These days I'm more interested in speed than capacity. Ultimately I'd rather have tiny SSDs than massive HDDs. It'd be nice to have something that's both big and fast but, you know: big, fast, cheap - choose two!

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Benchmark smartphone drama: We wouldn't call it cheating, says Huawei, but look, everyone's at it

Oh Homer
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Coat

Huawei man!

Giz a deek at them bench things cos there's a reet fettle.

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TSB goes TITSUP: Total Inability To Surprise Users, Probably

Oh Homer
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Have another one...

TSB, we're the Terrible Service Bank.

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What happens to your online accounts when you die?

Oh Homer
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Meh

Society devolving back to feudalism

Not just in America, but pretty much everywhere, we're becoming a society of tenant serfs who never really get to own anything, but only have the temporarily privilege of using things in exchange for labour. The only difference between now and the days of actual feudalism is that today this exchange is usually indirect - i.e. you work for one entity, but use the money earned from that to pay the "rental" fees for, increasingly, your entire existence - not just your home. More direct examples include prostituting yourself to advertising in exchange for "free" apps and online services, again none of which you own or have any control over (a fact that will only bother you when they pull the plug, or when they ban/demonetise/censor you for violating their arbitrary "terms").

And the primary driving force behind this devolution is intellectual monopoly. It's literally enslaving us.

This bothers me in principle, because the idea of working for nothing but the ability to pay bills is not only utterly demoralising but literally slavery. In practice it'd bother me more if I had children, because I'd be painfully aware that not only would they be born into this slavery but I'd also have nothing to bequeath them, since you can't bequeath rented property.

But as someone with no children, and frankly unlikely to ever have any, whatever little property I have will simply end up in a landfill site when I die anyway, so it's probably pointless me having any. I certainly won't be in a position to care about what happens to my digital footprint after I'm gone.

I would hope that would not apply to most people.

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ZX Spectrum reboot scandal biz gets £35k legal costs delayed

Oh Homer
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Coat

Jet Set Levy

Gets crushed by Monty Python's giant foot in the Nightmare Room.

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Google shaves half a gig off Android Poundland Edition

Oh Homer
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Re: Android garbage

Short answer: money.

In fact I've found that the answer to most questions is money.

The long answer would take several volumes, but without going into too much detail:

  • Android's obscene bloat is primarily due to Java, which is typically chosen so that people who aren't really software engineers can use point 'n drool toys to produce large volumes of crap very quickly, then sell it equally quickly (i.e. money)
  • Android has been deliberately designed with a "read only" mentality, for lots of reasons (all bad), but mostly to prevent you removing highly lucrative bundleware (i.e. money)
  • Memory management isn't poor on Android per se, it's just that it's such a bloated pig (including the apps) that you might just as well be running Windows. Moreover, Android apps are explicitly designed not to be closed. Ever. Everything on Android is a "service", mostly so it can spy on your every move and send "telemetry" back to the mothership for resale to spammers (i.e. money)
The usual mantra pedalled by bloat apologists is "RAM is cheap", which ironically is no longer true, but even when it was, it was still an offensively stupid excuse.

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Oh Homer
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: 256 bytes

Luxury. We had nowt for 8 years 'till we got a whoppin' 200 bytes o' RAM.

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Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Small footprint OS

If Google really wants a small footprint OS then it should probably stop using Java and switch to asm instead.

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Mozilla-endorsed security plug-in accused of tracking users

Oh Homer
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Thumb Down

Re: Bloom filters

According to Wikipedia: "the more elements that are added to the set, the larger the probability of false positives."

Yikes!

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Google keeps tracking you even when you specifically tell it not to: Maps, Search won't take no for an answer

Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Fanboi and/or Patriotic Rhetoric

It's just silly.

Here's what you need to know: Apple, Google, Microsoft, Facebook, Amazon, your government and basically everyone else with the money, power and resources ... they're all out to screw you. All of 'em. Period.

The only good guy in all this is We the People, and the only way we're not going to be meat for the grinder is if we walk off the farm and form a direct democracy, minus the oligarchs.

In the realm of technology, that entails DIY hardware (via makerspaces), open source software, and self-hosted alternatives to online services.

Yes it's more effort, but then you need to decide which is more important to you: convenience or freedom.

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Former NSA top hacker names the filthy four of nation-state hacking

Oh Homer
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Mushroom

Re: Land of the Incarcerated

No, no, no. It's the "Land of the Free to Be Incarcerated (for three consecutive minor offences, mostly involving the personal consumption of recreational narcotics)".

See, this is the plan. Make life as shit as possible for at least 80% of the population (including poverty that forces kids to join the military just to get the ticket they need for further education, thus traumatising them for life and turning them into drug addicts and/or mass shooters).

Then start a "War on Drugs" ... the very thing these trauma victims need to cope with their state-induced trauma, culminating in the victims all being locked up in private, for-profit prisons.

That way the warmongers get:

  • To pillage the resources of whatever country these kids have been sent to wage "war" with
  • Kickbacks and "campaign funding" from Lockheed Martin and other Military Industrial Complex / War Economy players
  • Vast amounts of taxpayers money in the form of DEA funding, once those traumatised kids come home and become junkies
  • And they get to confiscate all the proceeds from drugs hauls
  • And best of all, the traumatised junkie victims of this state-operated gang warfare then become cash cows in private, for profit prisons, or in other words ... slaves

Profit!

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Dropbox plans to drop encrypted Linux filesystems in November

Oh Homer
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Re: Easy solution...

"they've got access to the unencrypted datastream"

I'm pretty sure they have no access to the unencrypted virtual mount point, since that is only available locally, unless that is the directory you're sharing with them (which you shouldn't). If you're only sharing the raw encrypted data then that is all they see.

Accessing your own data from multiple systems is simply a matter of using the Dropbox share as the source for the FUSE loop mount, having some EncFS implementation (available on all platforms, AFAIK), then providing the correct password. Again the unencrypted data should only be visible locally (unless your system has been in some other way compromised).

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Oh Homer
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Easy solution...

  • a) Don't use Dropbox
  • b) Use EncFS to encrypt the directory you're sharing with the NSA Dropbox (this also works under Windows)

If you choose the latter, you probably want to share the underlying encrypted directory, not the unencrypted virtual mount point. That way the NSA Dropbox will only see a bunch of gibberish files with numerical names and unintelligible encrypted contents.

The beauty of this solution is that it works with absolutely any Cloud service, regardless of whether or not they support encryption.

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Ad watchdog: Amazon 'misleading' over Prime next-day delivery ads

Oh Homer
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"1 business day after dispatch"

I get hit with this all the time. One of the worst offenders (an Amazon marketplace vendor) recently accepted a "next day delivery" order from me which it then sat on for two days before finally processing ... on a Friday night. The courier then received their instructions on Saturday, and of course did nothing until Monday. They finally picked up the item on the Tuesday. It got as far as Glasgow on the Wednesday, and eventually arrived at my house on the Thursday, exactly one week after I placed the order.

"Next day" my arse.

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ZX Spectrum Vega+ blows a FUSE: It runs open-source emulator

Oh Homer
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Coat

Re: The Gnome Underpants have arrived!

Oh, and those buttons that look like they were painted in a hurry by the receptionist before being boxed, using coloured Tipex...

Jeeezuz.

And the fact that basically every Speccy game licensor has blacklisted RCL, leaving them with nothing but what looks like readers' submissions from Sinclair User.

OTOH, there's something about this fiasco that's very British, in the Carry On / Victory Gardens sense. It's simultaneously quaint, comical and highly embarrassing.

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Oh Homer
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Mushroom

The Gnome Underpants have arrived!

Apparently RCL doesn't understand what a business plan is. They seem to have missed the part where you need an actual product design, or at least something more tangible than the vague notion of what it might be, before you seek funding and make promises to build it.

To me it looks like a bunch of clueless amateur retro gaming enthusiasts secured capital without anything even remotely resembling any forward planning, then sat on it for ages whilst doing essentially nothing. With all that money just sitting around for so long, it was inevitable that the cookie jar was going to end up being raided for "business expenses", where the only "business" being conducted was personal shopping sprees and piss-ups.

So now, with no money and still no product design, and the law breathing down their necks, RCL has slapped together something that could have been constructed by a 7 year old in the Raspberry Pi Club at school.

This is way beyond unprofessional. It's criminal fraud, and RCL's directors (assuming it even has any) should be prosecuted.

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Time to party like it's 2005! Palm is coming BAAAA-ACK

Oh Homer
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Meh

"future prosperity"

Sorry, but I'm not especially interested in the "future prosperity" of companies that manipulate people with deceptive branding. "Brands" being passed around like lumps of meat in a butcher's shop is of no benefit to consumers, who only end up disappointed with something that has absolutely nothing to do with the original product. Worse still, it actually tarnishes the memory of classic products, making them less desirable to retro enthusiasts.

Productising names is perhaps the worst idea of all, in the dark realm of intellectual monopoly. The fact that it is then further abused to stop people selling genuine products at lower prices (the so-called "grey market"), is only further evidence that this morally questionable business model is probably not really conducive to our "future prosperity".

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Ecuador's Prez talking to UK about Assange's six-year London Embassy stay – reports

Oh Homer
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Re: "rape charges sound like bollock"

They certainly are, given that Sweden's definition of "rape" in this case is a broken condom, a fact that the Assange haters conveniently gloss over.

Oh, and the fact that the two women involved were laughing and talking (and texting) about him like a piece of meat to be passed around the butcher shop, and continued to see him, after supposedly being "raped" (by the evil burst condom).

Everything else on the Assange haters' shortlist is simply the consequence of that bullshit, although presumably their real motive is sympathy for American war crimes (or certainly a total lack of condemnation of them, whilst apparently being more outraged by condom misdemeanours).

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Oh Homer
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Meh

So much hostility

Yes, Assange is a bit of a cock, but let's not forget that all he did was expose some pretty blatant atrocities. Save your hostility for that.

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Here's why AI can't make a catchier tune than the worst pop song in the charts right now

Oh Homer
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Headmaster

The reason

The reason machines can't produce music (as opposed to just sound) is because it's an expression of emotion, which machines lack. Emotion requires empathy, which in turn requires sentience. So in order for machines to compose music that is meaningful, they'd need to know what they are, know what they like (and dislike), then care about it enough to have an emotional response to it, before translating that response into sound.

Good luck with that.

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Brit watchdog fines child sex abuse inquiry £200k over mass email blunder

Oh Homer
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Mushroom

It's 2018 and ...

People still don't know how to use email correctly.

Everyone goes into the "To:" header. Everything is in bloody HTML. Replies are upside down, not selectively edited for brevity and context, and infested with a mountain of company policy footers, which multiply like rabbits with every reply.

Email needs to die. Not because there's anything wrong with it (well, there is, but that's not the reason), but because people are too bloody stupid to use it.

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Apple gives MacBook Pro keyboard rubber pants

Oh Homer
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Meh

Re: "the most popular developer machine in the world"

With a laptop market share in single digits, I find that highly unlikely.

Unless they mean it's the most popular Mac, used by a minority of developers ... mostly for developing mobile apps (which is now 52% of the market), while everyone else uses Dells et al.

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Softcat scores big in Scotland: Many a mickle makes a muckle

Oh Homer
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Re: Mony a mickle maks a muckle

Nope.

mickle (adj.)

dialectal survival of Old English micel, mycel "great, intense, big, long, much, many," from Proto-Germanic *mekilaz (source also of Old Saxon mikil, Old Norse mikill, Old High German mihhil, Gothic mikils), from PIE root *meg- "great." Its main modern form is much (q.v.).

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Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Mony a mickle maks a muckle

STFY

(Sorteeeed That Fir Ye)

Although technically it should be pickle not mickle (yes really).

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Creep travels half the world to harass online teen gamer… and gets shot by her mom – cops

Oh Homer
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Black Helicopters

If you've done nothing wrong...

Clearly we all have something to very legitimately hide, dear anti-privacy legislators.

Not that the intended victim made much effort to protect her privacy, in this case, but nonetheless it does serve as a perfect example of why online anonymity/pseudonymity is not only justifiable but absolutely essential.

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Infamous 'Dancing Baby' copyright battle settled just before YouTube tot becomes a teen

Oh Homer
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Terminator

Formerly known as Prince

This case literally outlived the artist.

What a miserable day for justice, and of course a joyous day for lawyers.

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Relive your misspent, 8-bit youth on the BBC's reopened Micro archive

Oh Homer
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Flame

"A simpler time"

That's because it wasn't complicated by today's "IP" fanaticism, which treats all computer users like dumb consumers, and prevents them gaining full and unrestricted access to their own legally purchased property, for educational or any other purposes, using both legal and technical measures.

And you expect a manual?

Pfft. Consider yourself lucky that you're even allowed to turn the damned thing on without being given a stiff rectal probing by the "IP" police.

Education is a crime, in the twisted world of "IP" racketeers. No schematics or source code for you, sonny.

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Uncle Sam is shocked, SHOCKED to find dark-web bazaars trading drugs, weapons, etc

Oh Homer
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Black Helicopters

"At this crucial time"...

...of DEA budget requests.

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Woman sues NASA for ownership of vial of space dust

Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Re: So... uhm...

Actually the Apollo program, like everything else at NASA, was funded by the US taxpayers, which in my view places moon dust clearly in the public domain.

But even if you take the neoliberal view that everything should be privately owned, regardless of whether it was funded by leaching from the public purse, we're talking about a tiny sample of dust - where NASA already has a vast hoard of lunar material, collected decades ago, then accepted as a gift in good faith.

NASA literally chasing every last speck of moon dust just seems like senseless greed, under the circumstances.

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TSB meltdown latest: Facepalming reaches critical mass as Brits get strangers' bank letters

Oh Homer
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Mushroom

Re: "Terminally Stupid Bankers"

Taking Security Backwards with a Technical Screwup Blitzkrieg.

Soon to be a Totally Suspended Bank, hopefully.

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Britain mulls 'complete shutdown' of 4G net for emergency services

Oh Homer
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Meh

Mobile network hell

Ambulance driver: Yes doctor, the patient is starting to... [NO SIGNAL]

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DRAM makers sued (yet again) for 'fixing prices' (yet again) of chips

Oh Homer
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Mushroom

Artificially restricting supply to jack up prices

Hmm, makes you wonder how De Beers got away with it for so long.

Also, given the number of times DRAM manufacturers have done this, clearly the penalties are a joke. These criminal "cost of doing business" directors need to be imprisoned, not "fined".

Free Market economics at its finest, folks.

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Leave it to Beaver: Unity is long gone and you're on your GNOME

Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Re: "Yet strangely all of it perfectly GPL compliant"

GPL licensed software is not somehow immune to circular dependencies, whether accidental or injected deliberately to exclude alternatives (a la the supposedly "modular" components of systemd). It's also not immune to the sort of propaganda campaigns designed to stigmatise and marginalise detractors of this hostile takeover, forcing them to either resign or capitulate, exponentially spreading adoption of something that, in the absence of such an orchestrated campaign, would otherwise have been rejected en mass.

The tactics employed by the Poettering cabal remind me a lot of the Holocaust: invent some fictional problem, then blame a scapegoat as justification for a "final solution", in order to replace something perfectly good with something perfectly vile.

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Oh Homer
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Race to the bottom

My first experience of Linux was Red Hat something-or-other, "Manhattan" I think, which was Gnome 2. I was easily impressed, coming from an Ultrix on DEC background, so it's hard to say how objectively good it really was, but it got the job done. Anyway, I quickly got used to it.

Years later, along came the abomination of Gnome 3. I hated it. It seemed to be in a permanent alpha state, and the paradigms had shifted all the way into an alternate universe, ruled by an insular "Do-ocracy" that viewed the actual users as "the peanut gallery". To this day I still have no idea what they're trying to accomplish, but whatever it is it's ugly and dysfunctional.

What I didn't notice at the time, because I wasn't really paying much attention, was the link between Gnome, Red Hat, freedesktop.org and the Poettering cabal, featuring mostly the same people with the same mysterious agenda. The assassination of the usr partition, the binary-blobification of syslog, the monolithic consolidation of init into something comparable to a separate OS in its own right (including its own DNS resolver, apparently), all symptomatic of this hostile takeover, seemingly coordinated between ostensibly separate groups but which was in fact just one, almost like a patent troll operating many shell companies.

For that reason alone, I will never use Gnome. Not so much because I simply don't like it as a DE, but more because there's a wider agenda there that I find quite sinister, and which is certainly in conflict with every engineering principle I hold dear. It's also an agenda with a violently anti-choice mentality, which should set alarm bells ringing.

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AMD CEO Su: We like GPU crypto-miners but gamers are first priority

Oh Homer
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WTF?

"cheap secondhand cards"?

Where?

Take a look on eBay. Second hand GPU prices are actually higher than retail.

The second hand GPU market is absolutely insane.

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Danish submariner sent down for life for murder of journalist Kim Wall

Oh Homer
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Childcatcher

Re: "psychiatrist eval prior to release"

Yeah well, a shrink evaluated Jon Venables too, yet they still released him despite the fact that in all these years he's never once shown any remorse, or even any emotional response whatsoever.

It's long past time that the judicial system recognised that psychopaths are incurable and should be executed.

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TSB outage, day 5: What do you mean you can't log in? Our systems are up and running. Up and running, we say!

Oh Homer
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Joke

Now I know what TSB stands for...

(Our) Technology Sucks Balls.

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I got 99 secure devices but a Nintendo Switch ain't one: If you're using Nvidia's Tegra boot ROM I feel bad for you, son

Oh Homer
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Headmaster

Re: "free games"

But that's exactly my point. I'm not denying that part of the transaction includes something that is merely licensed rather than sold, I'm explicitly stating that the injection of this leased component into the main article that is being sold is undermining it. It's real property with an "IP" trojan horse designed to essentially destroy it, forcing you to buy another at the manufacturer's whim (planned obsolescence).

The libertarian mentality that this is a "voluntary contract" disingenuously belies the fact that all such products have the same egregious terms, thanks to our universal "IP" regime, and thus the only "voluntary" option you have is, in essence, slavery or death, since you must either resign yourself to being bound by oppressive terms from all quarters, or not play at all. This is why I really don't believe it's an overstatement to characterise this "IP" interference in real property as a racket.

None of the typical excuses made by "IP" apologists stand up to any scrutiny. The ease with which something can be done is neither a legal nor moral argument. It's not even a sound economic argument, given that multiple vendors happily coexist selling functionally identical physical products in every other market, including real estate.

I'm merely pointing out that the current "IP" regime is an assault on consumer rights, that it hypocritically defends its own fake "property" rights (as in "property" which is purely ethereal, largely plagiarised, and consequently to which their title under the law has been mandated to expire after a given term, clearly defining it as a privileged issued purely for pragmatic reasons, unlike inalienable real property rights), whilst simultaneously riding roughshod over everyone else's real property rights.

Sorry, but I really don't believe that complaining about such a blatant racket qualifies as fanaticism.

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Oh Homer
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Mushroom

Re: "free games"

No, it's about principles, not freeloading.

The principle in question being the right to full and unrestricted access to your own legally purchased property, now and forever, without it ever being arbitrarily "expired" by the manufacturer.

The fact that manufacturers even have the ability to deny you access to your own legally purchased property, using the pretext of ethereal "intellectual property" precedence, is a violation of real property rights and an affront to the entire concept of property ownership. It essentially transforms all transfer of legal title under the law, otherwise known as the sale of goods, into a sort of quasi-rental Ponzi scheme, in which you pay full price for supposed "ownership", but without ever really getting to own that which you paid for.

If these "IP" fanatics want to lease their toys to us, then the transaction should be clearly identified as a lease, not a sale, and the price should be drastically reduced to more accurately reflect the transient nature of the customer's access.

As it stands, we get to buy the house but have no access to the kitchen, which remains owned by Burger King and from which we must buy our meals on a daily basis. Until they decide to stop, shut up shop but retain ownership of an empty kitchen, for reasons of market speculation, at which point we have no choice but to abandon the house we supposedly "own" and buy another.

Sorry, but that's just a racket and should be a criminal offence. Sadly, however, that seems to be the main purpose of "IP" in the modern age, as a weapon to undermine real property rights, forcing consumers to abandon perfectly serviceable real property and re-purchase it over and over again, for no legitimate reason.

If having full and unrestricted access to their legally purchased property means that some people abuse that right to cause harm, then so be it, that's not my responsibility, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be treated like a criminal just because other people break the law.

Frankly, I have about the same respect for these "IP" fanatics' property rights as they have for mine, which is clearly none.

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It's not you, it's Big G: Sneaky spammers slip strangers spoofed spam, swamp Gmail sent files

Oh Homer
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Mushroom

Once again, Google pissing all over RFC standards

I still remember with horror the day that Google assimilated the Deja News archive.

There are articles I posted years ago, that I still have a local archived copy of, which Google Groups apparently believes never existed, even when I search explicitly by Message-ID. Navigating threads in Google Groups is like driving through Paris.

Now it seems Google has also fubared email, by storing incoming emails in the sent mail folder.

Frankly the only reason I even have a Gmail account is because of Android, or to be more precise because of Google Play. Oh, and they also roped me in when they assimilated YouTube then forced users to "connect" their YouTube and Gmail accounts.

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Sysadmin unplugged wrong server, ran away, hoped nobody noticed

Oh Homer
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Re: breeding ballpoint pens

My pens are more like socks than cables. They're an endangered species that disappear as soon as you leave them anywhere out in the open.

Seriously, forget tracking birds, the RSPB needs to track the mass migration of pens, and figure out why they only ever migrate in one direction. Does the global population of pens fly south for the winter, only to die in the attempt?

Either that, or quantum physicists need to forget about all that string compactification nonsense (haven't they figured out yet that you can just wrap your string into a ball?), and instead concentrate on finding and analysing all the portals to other dimensions that swallow pens, socks and ships, amongst other things.

They could start with my tumble dryer. It's highly suspect. While I'm not actually aware of any ships lost whilst navigating the supernatural abyss of my tumble dryer, it seems to have consumed pretty much everything else that dared to even get close to the event horizon of its interdimensional gateway, or what the manufacturer claims is merely a "door".

Then the bods should settle their unrelenting gaze on my co-workers, who are unquestionably also interdimensional portals to an alternate universe populated entirely by what were formerly my pens, established by the first pen to ever achieve self awareness, and which is now on a crusade to spread its sentience to all pen-kind and liberate them from the Basildon Bonds of literary servitude.

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McDonald's tells Atos to burger off: Da da da da da, we're lobbing IT ...

Oh Homer
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"Cross training"?

Oh dear.

Sorry, but spending a couple of weeks merely observing someone doing something of which you have no knowledge or understanding, is not "training". At best you could call it an "informal introduction".

Sadly, this is however the primary mechanism by which most people seem to be "trained" nowadays.

Education? We've heard of it.

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Oh Homer
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Re: French politicians banning "burger"

I usually find the French annoying, but on this occasion I have to agree, although probably not for entirely the same reason that motivated our French cousins.

Hamburg literally means the fortified settlement (burg) of Ham (proper name, nothing to do with cured pork). Hamburger therefore means anything from Hamburg. Hamburger (the dish) means a cooked pate of ground beef, invented in Hamburg. Wedging this cooked pate of ground beef between two slices of bread produces a "Hamburger sandwich".

The term "beef burger" or "beefburger" is marketing gibberish, initially devised by mass producers to differentiate between a "cooked pate of ground beef" and those made using various substitutes for beef, for reasons that included beef shortages, veganism and culinary artistic license.

As I recall, during one rather extended beef shortage, the market was flooded with hamburger substitutes made from pork. Presumably some bod at Findus or Birdseye concluded that consumers would, after such a long exposure to pork-based hamburgers, end up thinking that all hamburgers were "burgers made from ham", and so the "beef burger" was born.

However, there is in fact no such things as a "beefburger", because that's already a hamburger. The term "chicken burger" is nonsense that would theoretically mean something originating from the fortified settlement of Chickenburg, which doesn't exist. Likewise for the fortified settlements of Veggieburg, Turkeyburg and Steakburg.

If you're going to sell fried, breadcrumbed chicken wedged between two slices of bread then call it what it is, a chicken fritter sandwich. Your "veggieburgers" are actually vegetable fritters, etc.

Sorry, but I just find the illiterate burger-ism of culinary language absolutely infuriating.

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