* Posts by Chozo

207 posts • joined 17 Jun 2013

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Hate to break it to you, but billions of people can see Uranus tonight

Chozo
Coat

Re: Childish Name

Cornholio has a nice ring to it..

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EasyJet: We'll have electric airliners within the next decade

Chozo
Boffin

Batteries?

Beaming power from a ground station to the aircraft may be a better option and the technology to do this has been kicking around since the seventies. https://youtu.be/7O44WM1Q9H8

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IT plonker stuffed 'destructive' logic bomb into US Army servers in contract revenge attack

Chozo
Devil

Purely out of academic interest for educational & research purposes,

How would you folk hide a logic bomb?

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Boffin wins (Ig) Nobel prize asking if cats can be liquid

Chozo
Trollface

Re: Can you drink a cat?

Slurping pussy is the best way to get all your vitamins

according to leading vagitarian Rev Obadiah Steppenwolfe III

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This article has been deleted

Chozo
Coffee/keyboard

Thankyou my keyboard needed cleaning

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Sci-Fi titan Jerry Pournelle passes,
aged 84

Chozo

As Jerry Pournelle takes a step further out the stars seem even further away today

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Dear rioters: Hiding your face with scarves, hats can't fool this AI system

Chozo
Devil

Dear Cambridge researchers...

Feed it just photos of Mimi Choi and see how it performs.

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Judge: You can't call someone a c*nt, but a C∀NT is a cunning stunt

Chozo
Childcatcher

+1 for the George Carlin reference. His hilarious insight into how language has and continues to be changed is both fascinating & disturbing. For those who have never seen this comic legend here he is talking about how 'Shell Shock' became Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

https://youtu.be/hSp8IyaKCs0

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Terry Pratchett's unfinished works flattened by steamroller

Chozo
Coat

Eat your heart out Copernicus the flat earther's were right.

Call me a heretic but I always liked TP's early work 'Strata'

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Intel ME controller chip has secret kill switch

Chozo
Big Brother

Fool me once tovarisch

In 1962, the CIA contracted the Xerox company to place a miniature camera inside the photocopier at the Soviet Union's embassy in Washington DC. A team of four Xerox engineers working in secret shoe-horned a modified home movie camera into the machine that triggered the device whenever a copy was made. In 1963, this was installed by a Xerox technician during a regular maintenance visit to the Soviet embassy. On subsequent visits the Xerox man retrieved and replaced the film.

http://electricalstrategies.com/about/in-the-news/spies-in-the-xerox-machine/

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My fortnight eating Blighty's own human fart-powder

Chozo
Coat

Miracle Marketing Required

My chemistry is a little oxidised but doesn't the extraction of protein from peas & rice use some rather nasty cancer causing solvents? Anyhow I suppose it must be OK as the ingredients for Huel are remarkably similar to those of the pig feed.

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Amazon files patent for 'Death Star' flying warehouse

Chozo

It does have possibilities for international rescue operations.

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Barcodes stamped on breast implants and medical equipment

Chozo
Joke

It's no use shouting tonsillectomy sir, my screen says testicle removal.

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Raspberry Pi Foundation releases operating system for PCs, Macs

Chozo
Joke

Hurrah!

A small Puppy for christmas

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Santa's sleigh gets 21st century makeover

Chozo

Turbocharged?.. seriously the old one was fast enough

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Ham-fisted: Chap's radio app killed remotely after posting bad review

Chozo
Big Brother

A canary by any other name?

If the manufacturer can shut down the rig remotely then what's to stop a government doing the same in a time of civil unrest? Makes you wonder about all those cheap Baofeng handhelds that are so popular in the prepping community.

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Rogue One: This is the Star Wars back story you've been looking for

Chozo

The script sucks more than a zero-g toilet, there's a serious problem with the gravitas generators and can only assume that the bad CGI is a subliminal ploy to sell Princess Leia bobble head dolls.

But I don't care, loved every minute of it.

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Disney sued in race row: Axed IT workers claim jobs went to H-1B hires

Chozo
Coat

It's all a bit 'Mickey Mouse' if you ask me...

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Beancounter nicks $5m from bosses, blows $1m on fantasy babe Kate Upton's mobe game

Chozo

I wonder

Is the games company involved with ZZZ Accounting by any chance?

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China is building a full scale replica of the Titanic to repeatedly crash into iceberg

Chozo
Coat

Interesting factoid the Titanic was about the same size as a 'Typhoon' class submarine. So the mechanics required to make it sink & surface reliably by itself are well understood. Though why they are going to so much trouble is a mystery. Coupled with comments about it being seaworthy (albeit under tow) however is really tweaking my paranoia. An extra bulkhead here, a change to the superstructure there and you have a submersible weapons platform large enough to pop up and launch a few aircraft from. Way cheaper than nuclear powered options, difficult to hit with anti-ship missiles and almost impossible to find when it's sat waiting on the ocean floor. Ideal for maritime defence of scattered outposts in the disputed south china sea theatre.

Mines the one with the microfilm in the pocket

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Chozo

Re: Splendid idea

Getting there is half the fun

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HBO slaps takedown demand on 13-year-old girl's painting because it used 'Winter is coming'

Chozo

Re: Cease and desist

HBO will going after Welsh flags at this rate

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Facebook, Microsoft, Twitter and YouTube team to ID terror content

Chozo
Pirate

So let me get this straight...

It's OK to publish a video on YouTube showing how to make high explosives with a bonus masterclass in DIY shaped charges (purely for educational purposes and the removal of tree stumps ;) but if I make a passionate appeal for help in the ongoing struggle of Pirates Vs Ninjas then I get into trouble?

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Investigatory Powers Act signed into UK law by Queen

Chozo

Give me six lines written by the hand of the most honest of men, I will find something in them which will hang him - Cardinal Richelieu

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Passengers ride free on SF Muni subway after ransomware infects network, demands $73k

Chozo

Woot - Free Travel Indeed

If this had happened in London the nations capitol would probably be walking to work.

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2

Space crap: Flap, zap or strap? $30k from NASA for your pooper scooper

Chozo

Deep down I suspect the winning solution will just be bigger nappies, possibly with a hard suit.

As predicted by the rather good anime series 'Planetes'

http://smg.photobucket.com/user/atesh/media/DiaperMan.jpg.html

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Panicked WH Smith kills website to stop sales of how-to terrorism manuals

Chozo
Alien

Come, Hunt An Earthman

Is a SciFi novel by Philip E. High and depending on your viewpoint is either a tale of plucky humans fighting alien invaders or a thinly disguised manual for asymmetric warfare techniques, psychology & booby-traps. Available from all good booksellers including WH Smith.

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Forget malware, crooks are cracking ATMs the old-fashioned way – with explosives

Chozo

At the risk of of getting on everybody's watch list is there a breakdown for the type of solid explosives used. Are we talking 'fell off the back of a tank' military grade or anarchists 'stir & count fingers' cookbook?

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R2D2 delivery robots to scurry through the streets of San Francisco

Chozo
Terminator

Malfunctioning robots are the jurisdiction of the the 'Runaway' squad...

https://youtu.be/zCZY9Z6WvSY

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Latest F-35 bang seat* mods will stop them breaking pilots' necks, beams US

Chozo

Re: minimum weight

Pilot build does seem a likely problem, don't forget there's a lot of female fighter pilots out there.

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Lauri Love extradition A-OK

Chozo
Devil

Ladies & gentlemen of the jury

Orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to secret inquiry, lost again, finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters do not come cheap. Instead of our heroic IT specialists defending this great nation against the hordes of cyber pedoterrorists they have been trapped in endless meetings just explaining what the defendant did. Wether or not he actually caused physical harm to the computers or compromised sensitive data is both irrelevant & classified. The man hours alone wasted dealing with this miscreant warrant lengthy incarceration...

of everybody who thought bringing this case to trial was a good idea.

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BOFH: The case of the suspicious red icon

Chozo
Joke

How to annoy the Helldesk ;)

Job Ticket 1, fault code 1-1A

Job Ticket 2, fault code 1-1A-2B

Job Ticket 3, fault code 1B-2B-3

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Student charity's ex-IT boss in the cooler for stealing $1.3m through fake tech contracts

Chozo

To understand why the top level jobs at a charity organisation pay so well simply replace the word "Charity" with the phrase "Emotional extortion racket" ;)

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Mars' 'little green men' buried alive by merciless meteorites – new theory

Chozo

Re: Just look for the styrofoam packaging...

That's a pretty good idea. Whilst finding lichen or some slime mould on Mars would be incredible it's not something that many people are going to be exited about. On the other hand evidence of a technologically advanced civilisation on Mars would re-ignite the passion for the conquest of space.

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Star Trek Beyond: An unwatchable steaming pile of tribble dung

Chozo
FAIL

I sat through the entire confused & wretched mess and sincerely hope this is the last feature length voyage of this re-boot. IMHO the franchise needs to go back to its roots as a TV series.

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Thief dresses as Apple Store drone, walks off with $16,000 in iGear

Chozo

Wetware Exploit

Please let there be video footage of this..

I wonder if it was Jayson Street doing a pentest? You may remember him from his DEFCON 19 presentation "Steal Everything, Kill Everyone, Cause Total Financial Ruin!". He does this sort of thing quite a bit. Cheap embroidered polo-shirt, cheesy fake ID and within minutes has the run of the place.

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US military tests massive GPS jamming weapon over California

Chozo
Black Helicopters

There goes any hope of sneaking an autonomous GPS guided drone in over Area-51 :(

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Q: Is it wrong to dress as a crusader for an England match?

Chozo
Devil

<sigh> Football... it's just not Brockian Ultra-Cricket

yet!

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Brown boffins brew eye-tracking Javascript

Chozo
Devil

The interactive pron possibilities may be worth ogling

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Brits don't want their homes to be 'tech-tastic'

Chozo
FAIL

Oh no not again

Every bloody eighteen months some whizz kid startup figures out how to turn on an appliance with a cellphone. Now if they could just make an app to chisel the pizza from the bottom of my freezer and get it into the microwave..

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Planet 9 a captured alien, astroboffins suggest

Chozo

It could be...

a ball from a game of interstellar billiards

our solar system's construction shack

remains of large space station partially destroyed a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away

the dinosaur's colony ship

massive styrofoam decoy warship to scare invading aliens [Golden the Ship Was--Oh! Oh! Oh!" (1959)]

an enigmatic monolith

collapsed star

or simply where all the lost ball point pens go.

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NASA: We'll try again in the morning after friction ruins engorgement

Chozo
Coat

Bigelow Remix

Pump up the pod

Pump it up

While Mission Control's chillin

And the station's spinning

Look ahead, your fans are grinnin

Pump it up a little more

Get the party goin' on the lab floor

See, 'cause that's where the bubbles at

And you'd go pop if you do that

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Spanish Bitcoin farm raided

Chozo

Eurpol Press Release

https://www.europol.europa.eu/content/spanish-network-behind-illegal-distribution-pay-tv-channels-dismantled

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Devs claim charger uses 'photosynthesis' power battery charger

Chozo
Joke

Triffid 2.0

Triffid with a taser, able to charge mobile devices and safe as so long as you keep it docked.

4
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30 years on, Chernobyl wildlife still feeling effects of nuke plant catastrophe

Chozo
Flame

Save the cuddly animals

So when will all the cute woodland creatures be protected from the evil wizards radiation? The arched confinement shield been has been under construction for many years now and long overdue.

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Germans stick traffic lights in pavements for addicts who can't take their eyes off phones

Chozo
Big Brother

In the interest of safety...

Make it mandatory for all smart-phones to have a government issued Geofencing app installed. Keeping citizens safe with a warning as they approach areas deemed dangerous.

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CERN publishes massive data set

Chozo
WTF?

Say It Aint So

Wait, what! no ElReg equivalent units for data storage???

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F-35's dodgy software in the spotlight again

Chozo

Re: 'Superiority', by Arthur C. Clarke

German battle tank development during WWII is a good example for those not into Science Fiction. Where designs became more destructively awesome but correspondingly complex to build and unreliable to operate with low production rates.

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Dutch students serve up world's first 'drone café'

Chozo
Big Brother

Re: "What's not to like?"

Mount a taser and the possibilities go way beyond urban pacification.

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'Impossible' EmDrive flying saucer thruster may herald new theory of inertia

Chozo
Alien

Keep Calm

And

Engage The Hyperdrive

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