* Posts by 's water music

1528 publicly visible posts • joined 31 Jan 2013

UK's internet registry prepares a £100m windfall for its board members – and everyone else will pay for it

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.scot shirley? Although that fucks up the joke on several different levels

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Trollface

tackling corruption

If only there were a suitable exemplar of best practice that other similar organisations like Nominet could learn from. Perhaps the European Patent Office might know a song about that. If they hum the tune I'm sure Nominet could join in

Never let something so flimsy as a locked door to the computer room stand in the way of an auditor on the warpath

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Re: Golden Rule of Audit

don't talk about audit club?

wait, wut?

Phisher folk reel in Computacenter security vetting mailbox packed with sensitive staff data

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Happy

Re: Mm somebody clicked something

I hate to do this

You are fooling nobody here; probably not even yourself.

US Air Force probes targeted malware attack, blames... er, the US Navy? What?

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Re: Laws lol

>> Getting sent to prison for crime is like attending an advanced seminar in how to be a criminal

Probably not given the number of reoffenders who are promptly picked up

Getting sent to prison for crime is like attending an advanced seminar in how to be a criminal at Trump University!

Microsoft Windows 10 'Burger King' build 1903: Have it your way... and it may still leave a nasty taste in your mouth

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Re: Windows 1903 background horror

Screensavers often used by internal comms teams to reinforce key corporate messages

PwC used to periodically reinforce the message that internal comms always pick shitty developers to create their screen savers by ramming though yet another one that causes a P1 because it is a massive resource hog or some such nonsense. I expect they are not alone

Jeff Bezos finally gets .Amazon after DNS overlord ICANN runs out of excuses to delay decision any further

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Re: Who will use it?

outside of these hallowed forums who the fuck even uses domain names to request www content. old people just type amazon into the address bar of their browser and let history or their default search provider get them from there to https://www.amazon.[country]/ and everyone else uses the Amazon app on their mobile device.

We may decry the way people consume content with knowing anything about the technical plumbing but nobody else cares and Amazon will carry on catering to wherever the revenue comes from. Seems like a hollow victory for Jeff

Dedicated techie risks life and limb to locate office conference phone hiding under newspaper

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Re: Loopy.

Is that like a reach around!?

Considerably more disappointing

Russian bots are just for rigging US elections? They hit home, too: Kid stripped of crown in TV contest vote-fix scandal

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Well they could start by not registering multiple votes from the same number...

They would have to avoid the moral hazard inherent in profit sharing in the premium rate text voting that I assume is part of the economics of these shows in Russia as in the rest of the world.

Far better to just accept that these types of show are light entertainment scripted reality with a similar relationship to truth and competition as pro wrestling and watch them if you enjoy them on that basis or not if you don't. A take-down of the sort of cheating effort alleged is only of any interest in the context of the corrosive impact of similar corruption in wider civil society.

It's 50 years to the day since Apollo 10 blasted off: America's lunar landing 'dress rehearsal'

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Re: beancounters at the top

@Bob. You ok hun?

Giga-hurts radio: Terrorists build Wi-Fi bombs to dodge cops' cellphone jammers

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Re: Re:have a machine with a 4G module just poll a random Reddit page

Presumably why, in Hollywood at least, they always stick to a strict wiring color code

And yet, nobody ever seems to be sure if it was the red wire or the blue one to cut first

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> you do ABSENCE of a signal as the indicator.

Such as Radio4 longwave for example

That sounds like madness (the idea rather than radio 4...). Who would use such an idea to trigger a weapon system?

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Re: Elections???

Would this be the election in which 270 humans died, literally *died*, because they were counting votes until they died?

The BBC published a statistical analysis that suggested this was not to far out of line with the normal mortality rate for the sample size over the exposure period. There were some seven million people involved in the election over a period of several days. The analysis was fairly rough and ready and suggested that there were legitimate questions to ask, such as whether an election on this scale in a logistical environment such as the Philippines might be better being staged over a longer period.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-48281522

Tesla big cheese Elon Musk warns staffers to tighten their belts in bid to cut expenses (again)

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Mushroom

Re: Bah!

I wonder if all this belt-tightening has put the kybosh on the eagerly awaited automatic pre-collision "YeeeHaaa!" klaxon?

They probably won't be able to afford the royalties for the Slim Pickens sample any more. A shame because segueing into 'We'll Meet Again' post-impact would have also made sense and would have cut down on the costs of audio editing.

obvs-->

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Re: Gets worse, doesn't it...

Might make servicing a bit of a problem.

Shirley tesla servicing involves an engineer sshing into your car and polishing up the firmware remotely

Want a good Android smartphone without the $1,000+ price tag? Then buy Google's Pixel 3a

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Re: saving battery, preventing accidental interaction when you first put it in

SatNav

I have never experience d a SatNav app that didn't keep the display alive. If you need to start a new journey or modify one that is in progress and do not have a passenger available to do this then sure unlocking with a a fingerprint reader is trivial once you have found somewhere safe to pull over

Tesla driver killed after smashing into truck had just enabled Autopilot – US crash watchdog

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Re: "Neither the human driver nor the AI-powered Autopilot were paying any attention."

DOI: I have ordered a Tesla without the Full Self Driving thingy

I'm pretty sure you have that in common even with those people who have ordered a tesla with the 'auto-pilot' option

Hi! It looks like you're working on a marketing strategy for a product nowhere near release! Would you like help?

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Thumb Up

Yup, I've had a lot of good ideas while out walking or in the toilet.

Um...that doesn't sound good does it :)

It's ok, it looks like you were saved from your blushes by an l-for-n typo

Talk about a ticket to ride... London rail passengers hear pr0n grunts over PA system

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Coat

Re: As an honourary Northerner...

...That sub-heading takes some beating too...

There's a driver that somewhere that knows how it feels

Age verification biz claims no-payment model for 40% of Brits ahead of July pr0n ban

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Re: What's that sound I hear?

... sexy-anne-widecombe.com ...

This is like one of those Teresa/Theresa May things right?

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Trollface

Re: Business model

My business model is to spam out blackmail emails threatening to expose the receipient for registering for a pr0nz age verification service and claiming to also have a record of their browsing history.

Sometimes a low-tech approach offers a better rate of return than actually going to the trouble of compromising a service and properly targeting your blackmail.

Key to success: Tenants finally get physical keys after suing landlords for fitting Bluetooth smart-lock to front door

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Trollface

Re: "...require GPS to be enabled in order to use the Bluetooth functionality..."

Can someone explain this to me?

Presumably the bluetooth signal opens any lock from that vendor but the app is geo-locked so you can only open one for which you are authorised. Or it might be a requirement of teh ad-network libraries they are using.

Airbnb host thrown in the clink after guest finds hidden camera inside Wi-Fi router

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Re: To be fair to AirBnB I don't think they can be held responsible for people doing this

downvoted because it is only your choice if the listing includes 'creepy perv cam in the bedroom' in the list of amenities

'Software delivered to Boeing' now blamed for 737 Max warning fiasco

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truth in homonyms

[significant defects in aviation control software] Let me count them for you...

1, 2, many

1, too many

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A[t] the end of the day it was a paid option to have a AOA mismatch warning

If I understood the article correctly, it was saying that the AoA gauge was optional. The AoA disagree alert should have been displayed whenever the condition occurs but in fact would only be displayed if the optional AoA gauge was taken

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Re: A rogue engineer dit it, Muilenburg and everyone in manglement are investigating

pretty sure they will eventually discover that it was one of the big engineers that did and and ran away without leaving their name.

So sorry, Is this compo fund enough?

Apple stock hits bottom ... as AirPod exits man's backside and still works after colonic travels

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Gimp

cleaning up

The group of people who choose to retrieve and re-use the AirPod in this scenario correlate well with those who are not afraid to get stuck in and get their hands dirty

probably has gloves too----->

HPE court witness subjected to own LinkedIn page

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Re: pour encourager...

why not just execute all of them pour encourager les autres?

Part of me likes your way of thinking but I'm not sure you fully grasped what Voltaire was getting at unless you meant the wider PHB diaspora

Sinister secret backdoor found in networking gear perfect for government espionage: The Chinese are – oh no, wait, it's Cisco again

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can't be asked

is this a minced oath, an eggcorn, a new literal level of busyness or all three?

Cool story, brew: Utah karaoke crooners receive cold, refreshing shock as alcohol authority refuses beer licence

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Pint

Re: me no understand

it sounds to me like a recreational license allows somewhere that isn't a bar to serve drinks incidentally to the main activity of the establishment. This sounds like a bar that specialises in Karaoke wants to operate somewhere that a bar would not be allowed (too close to a church). Whatever one may think of the licensing laws of the state this sounds like an attempt to bypass on a technicality to me.

obvs--->

Boeing boss denies reports 737 Max safety systems weren't active

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Re: Hang on...

he simply must come for dinner next time he is in the area

Owner of Smuggler's Inn B&B ordered to put up a sign warning guests not to cross into Canada

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Trollface

Re: Canada! America! Canada! America!

but the parents nearly decked me when I pointed out that, as they lived in America, they must therefore be Americans.

Shirley @kiwi might be expected to be an expert on nationality distinctions that literally nobody cares about

Buying a second-hand hard drive on eBay? You've got a 'one in two' chance of finding personal info still on it

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Re: Uh??

What's with this "keeping the magnets" thing?

commentards investigating how the fucking things work like any good juggalo engineer

IT sales star wins $660k lawsuit against Oracle in Qatar – but can't collect because the Oracle he sued suddenly vanished

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Trollface

What's more amazing is that sales types want to still work for them.

If the figures in the article(s) are the amounts of commission earned, which oracle claws back, which goes to court, which are won, which are reported, then imagine the commission amounts that are in play. Even if only a tiny proportion of the sales force ever stand a chance of earning the big bucks, it is a variable ratio reward schedule, the best kind.

----> like a meth-head but with better teeth---->

Bloke faces up to 20 years in the clink after gun held to dot-com owner's head in robbery

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I note that owmyballs.com is privacy protected

I've had it with these mother-fscking slaps on this mother-fscking plane: Flight fight sparks legal brouhaha over mid-air co-ords

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Coat

Re: Here have a can of worms...

Presumably, if the plane is over international waters, it's the Law of the Sea, except the US isn't a signatory to that...

Admiralty law you say. There's a FMOTL who can undoubtedly help with that. This kind of lawsuit sounds right up their rabbit hole. Note my lower case nick

Easter is approaching – and British pr0n watchers still don't know how long before age-gates come into force

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pr0nz watchers fighting back

Watch out for the right hook. Could pack some power

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Re: how about a simpler system

[removing adult content block for a 'friend' with 'exotic tastes']

I'm still struggling to work out where the cocktail site came into this. Metaphors are hard.

A quick cup of coffee leaves production manager in fits and a cleaner in tears

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Re: Do not unplug!

The type of cleaner you want will have plenty of plastic sheeting

As Alexa's secret human army is revealed, we ask: Who else has been listening in on you?

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Re: Boston

...the developing world...

from the context, presumably they mean Boston, Lincs.

Sorry, Elon, your Tesla roadster won't orbit for billions of years

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Wouldn’t it be funny if that thing that might smash into Earth and destroy all human life turned out to be something we’d sent out there in the first place.

What would be really funny would be the car landing on Charlton Heston's head on that beach

User secures floppies to a filing cabinet with a magnet, but at least they backed up daily... right?

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Re: stop me if you've heard this one....

A rubber hammer is an essential tool for anyone who works on cars / anything mechanical...

Yup, the gag should be to send to PFY for some glass nails when the rubber hammer first crops up in training

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Gimp

Re: Well if the US ships want the Chinese to keep out of the way

When we got them back from the repair centre, they were always packed in a big mound of bubble-wrap

To protect the other parcels during delivery?

... or perhaps a fetish thing---->

Woman calls cops on shadowy baddie barricaded in bathroom... to discover: Roomba gone rogue

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Terminator

maybe there's background noise to drown it out

Roomba turned on the taps whilst rubbing one out?

Brit hacker jailed for strapping ransomware to smut site ad networks

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must have watched One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

left the cinema before the end surely?

Free online tax filing? Yeah, that'll soon be illegal thanks to rare US Congressional unity

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Re: Oh, it's a new tax year here in the UK

I used an accountant to manage the statutory stuff for my PSC, company accounts, payroll employeres liabilities etc. He chucked in a personal tax return within the fee for all of the company officers/shareholders but the return was pretty trivial. I was required to do one for some years about a decade ago when I was employee and it was simple then. The figures all came from P60/P11D plus some trivial investment income. The online form and associated notes led me through it with ease. I think I got a refund of a few hundred pounds most years. I think that was mostly down to a frequently changed company car

Hello, tech support? Yes, I've run out of desk... Yes, DESK... space

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Re: Set up Guide?

Like some fearless users who think the Windows directory and its subdirectories are a mess and need to be rationally organised. You know, put all the .dll's in the dll subdirectory, the .exe's in the exe subdirectory and so on.

Life's too short for that kind of OCD. If it isn't my data and it doesn't contain teh pr0nz then into the recycle bin it goes. Problem solved.

Edtech will save our schools from cuts and spare our teachers from burnout, booms UK.gov

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Re: What schools are for

but if each school didn't choose it's own edu 'platform' independently based on kick backs or sales patter fatigue or whatever then who would employ all the flash and silverlight developers who never updated their skillz?

Only one Huawei? We pitted the P30 Pro against Samsung and Apple's best – and this is what we found

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Trollface

image tech

Sheesh, when did everyone become too fancy-pants for hand-print stencils

How do you sing 'We're jamming and we hope you like jamming, too' in Russian? Kremlin's sat-nav spoofing revealed

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Coat

spoofing counter-measures

Sounds expensive. Also a bit woolly impossible to really verify in practice. The best kind of defence procurement project.

Defence contractor checks out taxpayer's coat---->