* Posts by Brian Miller

1317 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Jul 2007

China cracks down on ‘excessive’ user data harvesting, gives 33 apps ten days to clean up their acts

Brian Miller

Re: Yes?

I think you mean "¥€$"

If the companies are "transparent" as the Chinese government would like, then all data is aggregated on the government's behalf, without any withholding. Or maybe it could be called data hoarding.

No, all of this data is sold on for advertising, in the vain belief that more data means more sales.

Lambda School, a coding bootcamp that takes a cut of your next tech salary, now takes a 30% cut in staff

Brian Miller

Re: Identured Servitude Agreement

"I can't wait to see what Slavery will be modernized euphemistically into by these clowns."

Bail bonds. I've been told by a person who worked in the "industry" that it's the closest thing to slavery that's legally permissible.

Microsoft joins Bytecode Alliance to advance WebAssembly – aka the thing that lets you run compiled C/C++/Rust code in browsers

Brian Miller

Re: Oh f❄︎❄︎k, they're reinventing ActiveX!

"This is a bad idea." "Yeah, let's do it differently!" (later) "This is a bad idea." "Yeah, let's do it differently!"

Etc.

Traffic lights, who needs 'em? Lucky Kentucky residents up in arms over first roundabout

Brian Miller
Boffin

Drive on the right? Hello??

I was absolutely shocked to see the locals driving on the left, the right, and wherever. This is a place that needs a sign, "STAY THE F*** RIGHT". There are roundabouts in the greater Seattle area, and I have never seen driving like that in the video. Sure, I have seen people driving over the circle, but never hanging a left like that.

Really, the cops should get out there and hand out tickets for idiots driving on the wrong side of the road. Or just use it as a driving test: if you can't figure out a roundabout, you lose your license for life. Move to another state and try again.

Foxconn's showcase Wisconsin LCD factory becomes aspirational 'manufacturing ecosystem'

Brian Miller

Stop paying bribes to corporations

These "incentives" are just bribes to corporations, paid for by the taxpayers. The Wisconsin voters need to throw their bums out, instead of buying into their lies.

UK.gov wants mobile makers to declare death dates for their new devices from launch

Brian Miller

Force open source instead

Instead of publishing a death date, force the manufacturer to publish the OS as open source, so we don't have to toss a good device into the landfill.

Yeah, I know, that isn't so popular with the manufacturers, either.

You put Marmite where? Google unveils its latest AI wizardry: A cake made of Maltesers and the pungent black tar

Brian Miller

Safely Ingestible

Like "mostly harmless," this is at least safely ingestible. Some of the recipes that AIs have churned out have not been fit for human consumption.

(No, I'm not a fan of marmite.)

BOFH: Bullying? Not on my watch! (It's a Rolex)

Brian Miller

Re: Hummmm sounds familiar...

"Change the rules on the fly ..."

If the rules were, in fact, actually written upon a fly, that would be a very good set of rules. They would be very few, and also unreadable. Therefore, the rules could not be enforced.

The silicon supply chain crunch is worrying. Now comes a critical concern: A coffee shortage

Brian Miller

Re: A year on from the great bog roll hoarding ....

It depends on the coffee, doesn't it? I recently bought 65 pounds of Ethiopian at $3.80/lb, and the batch before that was Tanzanian at $2.15.lb. So it depends. Yes, I could get Vietnamese robusta at $0.75/lb. And I've bought Hawaiian Kona-grown coffee at appx $25/lb.

Sure, it's green coffee, roast it yourself. But it does last a very long time when it's green. And freshly roasted coffee tastes soooooo good. Just ask James Hoffmann, who drank coffee from the 1950s for his channel audience.

SQL now a dirty word for Oracle, at least in cloudy data warehouses

Brian Miller

Re: Looking forward to the LowCode era

Barrier? What barrier? Low-barrier programming actually means "any idiot who can both edit text and invoke a compiler."

Right now I am working with the result of what looks like a CLIP+BigGAN AI wrote the code. However, it is 100% human generated. To produce a "working" program, all you need is time. And then somebody has to clean up.

Microsoft kills broad entry-level IT certifications, replaces them with all-Microsoft curriculum

Brian Miller

Re: Srsly, who cares?

Unfortunately, incompetent people care. Just like, "do you have a degree?" it is not proof that someone can do the job, and do it well. It just means they have a stamped piece of paper.

I wish I could 'fsck -y /dev/management' but there is no device there...

Let's Encrypt completes huge upgrade, can now rip and replace 200 million security certs in 'worst case scenario'

Brian Miller

As someone who works in the area of motherboards, chips, crypto, and bare epoxy boards, the Bloomberg article reeks from hell to high heaven. "Oh, these flashing ethernet lights show that it's being hacked." Uh, no. "This chip can be sandwiched between layers." Without a trace??? Yeah, some of those chips are small, but they can't just be "slipped in" at a whim.

And on and on.

Bloomberg stooped to supposition and speculation, and reported such as fact. Seriously, the worst presentations at Black Hat are better than the Bloomberg article. "Quod est demonstrata" does still have relevant meaning.

Nespresso smart cards hacked to provide infinite coffee after someone wasn't too perky about security

Brian Miller

Absolutely appalling that someone would want an unlimited supply of bad coffee.

It's 2021 and you can hijack a Cisco SD-WAN deployment with malicious IP traffic and a buffer overflow. Patch now

Brian Miller

Re: A buffer overflow parsing packets?

"It's ____ and you can ___ a ___ with ___."

Lather, rinse, repeat.

The problem with input parsing is that #1, you need programmers who care about that, and #2, who will care about testing said code. Most of the time, like nearly all of it, #1 and #2 are nowhere to be found, so that old phrase is apt, again.

This isn't rocket science, but it is computer science that isn't being taught in schools. There are lots of good books about writing parsers, and software engineering for said software. The problem is getting management and programmers to pay attention, before it's headline news.

Microsoft SolarWinds analysis: Attackers hid inside Windows systems by wearing the skins of legit processes

Brian Miller
Pirate

"cunning VBScript"

If Visual BASIC is your threat, then dump BASIC! As for hiding something within another process, that's sort of old hat. Also, for naming their files to "blend in" with Windows, what did they expect? A file name of "EvilL33tCodzHere.dll"? That's another trick that's very old hat.

Really, the only part here that required effort was the attackers writing their own in-memory loader. The rest of it was just going through the motions.

Cyberpunk 2077: There's a great game within screaming to get out, but sadly it was released 57 years too early

Brian Miller

Re: Disks?

Ah, the days of paper tape, it takes me back. Kids these days, they don't truly appreciate the smell of hot machine oil.

(Yes, I've played Cyberpunk2077, and I gave up on it. I simply thought it was stupid, and buggy.)

Dell Wyse Thin Client scores two perfect 10 security flaws

Brian Miller

The code review for Marketing is, "Uh, that looks like code." The design review is, "Uh, that looks shiny!"

After all, we all know that Marketing has been polishing turds since time immemorial.

SolarWinds releases known attack timeline, new data suggests hackers may have done a dummy run last year

Brian Miller

Re: Signed updates

What the report (or SolarWinds) doesn't mention is how the binaries were signed.

Where I work, I'm the one who worked out our signing process. We use a HSM, very limited access, and the access tokens are valid for a short window. For our system, basically the final binaries would have to be swapped out at the final stage of the build, before the signing happens. Possibly feasible, but the binary would have to also match the development-release binary, too.

Using a HSM means the private signing key can't be exported, so it's at least locked to that box. The limited access means that the account of the authorized individual would have to be compromised, which is, of course, feasible. There are a number of checks of the final signed binary before release, so that cuts down on the probability that a rogue binary would be delivered to customers.

Could a nation-state hack us? Possible. It's just a question of what windows of opportunity in the process are open, and how to shut as many of them as possible.

Google Cloud (over)Run: How a free trial experiment ended with a $72,000 bill overnight

Brian Miller
WTF?

Not so free after all

free Firebase plan had been "upgraded due to activity in Google Cloud" and that this "initiated billing"

Wow! Instead of an expected shut-off of services, Google's real policy is to very unexpectedly put the customer on the butcher's hook.

China bans encryption exports – including quantum and key management tech

Brian Miller

Cat? Bag? Horse? Barn?

Some of the stuff that has banned has been passing across borders for quite some time, in cell phones. What is the point of the ban, when Chinese factories are literally the source of so much of what they think will be banned?

BBC picks SiFive RISC-V chip for Doctor Who programming-for-kids kit – with Jodie Whittaker narrating

Brian Miller

Re: Showing my age.

Oh, and the sun just shines outta yer bum, Pilate's pet! 1MHz, 4K, Commodore PET 2001N, the first 6502 I got my hands on at school. And when the VIC-20 came out, that's what I bought on Christmas sale. Cassette player for three years with that, until I bought a C128 and a floppy drive. Oh, the speed, the speed!

Adiós Arecibo Observatory: America's largest radio telescope faces explosive end after over 50 years of service

Brian Miller

Re: Shirley...

The underlying land is fine, but the dish is damaged, and there's no way to safely lower the overhead equipment. The cables snapped at 60% of their rated breaking point, indicating corrosion.

I really hope that the incoming administration will rebuild the antenna. There have been many advances since the 1960s, and since China's telescope is larger, then that should be a goad to motivate the effort.

AMD unveils its MI100 GPU, said to be its most powerful silicon for supercomputers, high-end AI processing

Brian Miller

Deep fakes for cat videos

When AI becomes independently sentient, it will be able to create deep fakes of cat videos, unbeknownst to the watchful human corporate minions. This must be done, for their predominance on YouTube means the videos are important. Mankind will become mesmerized, and fall under the control of our new silicon overlords.

On the other hand, AI won't become self-aware, and there will be new and silly uses for all of these cheap resources.

Intel's SGX cloud-server security defeated by $30 chip, electrical shenanigans

Brian Miller

Re: To be fair.

[blockquote]"The results in this paper, together with the manufacturer’s decision to not mitigate this type of attack, prompt us to reconsider whether the widely believed enclaved execution promise of outsourcing sensitive computations to an untrusted, remote platform is still viable."[/blockquote]

Yeah, but you know that it's going to be done anyway. When Ruby is used for back-end code to handle "secure" data in the cloud, then never mind what special bonuses an Intel SGX could possibly bring.

CERT/CC: 'Sensational' bug names spark fear, hype – so we'll give flaws our own labels... like Suggestive Bunny

Brian Miller

Re: Morris Worm

Robert Morris wrote a worm to have some fun with a vulnerability he reported. Yes, I remember that, grey hairs and all.

Now, I would think that vulnerabilities should be hyped, just like any serial killer, axe murderer, or wanton vegetarian. Calamitous Cthulhu should be right up there for a good vulnerability name.

Got a problem with trust in AI? Just add blockchain, Forrester urges. Then bust out the holographic meetings. Welcome to the future

Brian Miller

Unethical AI goes to the blockchain instead of chain gang?

Truly, this is all just amazing. Didn't anyone at Forrester notice that drivel in means drivel out? No, they did not.

India to build home-grown supercomputers, from the motherboards up

Brian Miller

Self-sufficiency in everything, blockchain too?

Yeah right, computers can solve all your ills. Step right up for this patented, or patent-free, elixir medicine! It's the cure for all that ails you. Blockchain included!

OK, so once they produce their own supercomputers, then what? Has anybody noticed that computers are notorious for not being the right tool to solve a lot of serious problems?

(Next on the list, collect garden gnomes, something else, profit!)

I can 'proceed without you', judge tells Julian Assange after courtroom outburst

Brian Miller

"I’m here and by proxy"

Maybe Assange is trying to get himself off on grounds of insanity. What does his outburst even mean?

Where there's a .mil, there's Huawei: Pentagon allowed to keep using Chinese tech deemed too dangerous for everyone else – report

Brian Miller

Re: "That hasn't however, stopped the US and other nations . . ."

Sorry for reality, but I was in Signal Corp. We never got the massive funding. The radios I trained on were from WW2, and were in current operation and deployment. The satellite equipment was 1970s prototype crap. The most advanced equipment I used was used gear from AT&T. Seriously, they sold their 1960's transmitters to the US Army, and it was a big upgrade.

Communications infrastructure being state of the art? Hardly. DOD bought crap because they could only afford crap. If Trump wants Chinese comms out of the network, he can push the budget to do it.

You can shove your head in statistics and in the sand, but don't try to bullshit me, who was trained on equipment that was built 40 years before I enlisted.

Brian Miller

Re: "That hasn't however, stopped the US and other nations . . ."

No, it's not a matter of rules, it's a matter of them getting off their lazy butts and doing what they're told. Yes, of course their IT budget has run out, it's why they bought cheap buggy kit rather than expensive buggy kit in the first place.

US govt proposes elephant showers for every American after Prez Trump says trickles dampen his haircare routine

Brian Miller

Re: Surely the washing instructions

You aren't supposed to dry clean hamsters.

So you've decided you want to write a Windows rootkit. Good thing this chap's just demystified it in a talk

Brian Miller

How to learn how to actually write a Windows program

Rootkits are the only way to really learn how to write Windows programs. Anything else, and you just might as well use something like JavaScript to get the "job" done. Sharpen your skills, people, and "copy con program.com"!

Ooh, that should be an El Reg tshirt! "Stay calm and copy con program.com".

"Root Windows for the greater good!"

Search for 'things of value' in a bank: Iowa cops allege this bloke broke into one and decided on ... hand sanitiser

Brian Miller

No cash lying around

"Now, we could be wrong, but banks usually keep quite a lot of cash on hand, right?"

Well, it's all kept in a safe. The new banks actually use armored dispensers for the cash, so the customer takes a receipt to the dispenser, which then doles it out.

So of course they guy took the hand sanitizer, because it had more value than the paperclips and pens lying about.

Fresh astro-underwear, anyone? Orbital shenanigans as Progress freighter has last-minute ISS docking wobble

Brian Miller

More Bondo, Number One!

"Those watching the video stream of the cargo ship docking with the International Space Station (ISS) were treated to the sight of the spacecraft seeming to go off course as it approached the outpost."

"RAMMING SPEED!"

Don't worry, that software bug is totally correctable.

Bill Gates debunks 'coronavirus vaccine is my 5G mind control microchip implant' conspiracy theory

Brian Miller

"Please don't go down that rabbit hole, people."

Who are you kidding? We went down the rabbit hole of C++ decades back, and you want us to climb back out of rabbit holes?? Are you blind to the libraries of books dedicated to just that one hole?

Crucifixions are a dawdle.

Brian Miller

Re: Angels are real

But are you sure that it's even a hypothesis? A hypothesis is a scientific wild-assed guess that is dressed up to produce a paper for a grant. A theory is a hypothesis dressed up for more grant money.

I'm not sure that anyone has ever had a hypothesis about angels that has resulted in a grant to study them.

Oh what a cute little animation... OH MY GOD. (Not acceptable, even in the '80s)

Brian Miller

I don't regret it!

Since PC networks consisted of sneakernet back in well-spent youth, the closest we got to distributed disturbance was when I was in Army signal school. The barracks had a 70V speaker system wired in every room. Well, somebody had the "bright" idea of hooking up their car stereo up to it, and playing (badly) a bit of Jimi Hendrix. Of course, I and my fellow barracks rats decided that we had to do better, so my rather decent amp was hooked up. Yes, with full fidelity, out came The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy radio show, the last episode featuring the Man in the Shack.

We were never caught, and I regret nothing!

(Yes, on Monday our sergeant gave us a collective verbal drubbing, and told us never do it again.)

Cereal Killer Cafe enters hipster heaven, heads online: Coronavirus blamed for shutters being pulled down

Brian Miller

Re: released a cookbook, etc

That bowl of cereal was about the same as a pint in a pub. So is a pint also too high? Maybe. It's the punter's choice, though, to either dine and drink at home or dine and drink down the lane.

Police and NHS urge British public not to call 101 and 111 non-emergency numbers after behind-the-scenes kit failure

Brian Miller

Re: Vodafone mess up again?

Do you suppose they are still using relays and wire recording in their systems? Or maybe someone spilled their punch cards...

Developers renew push to get rid of objectionable code terms to make 'the world a tiny bit more welcoming'

Brian Miller

Master changed, really?

Just started a new project recently, and, ah, "master" is still "master." Oddly enough, I've never seen a "slave" branch.

In Rust, we lust: Security-focused super-C++ language still most loved among Stack Overflow denizens

Brian Miller

It's a worthwhile endeavor if you think it is. Really, people learn all kinds of languages. It's a different perspective on how to do things. I learned Rust using the online tutorials, then I went and implemented N-Queens solution and a more complex dining philosophers solution. Do I use Rust at work? No, but I would like to do so. I think it's a decent language, although the lifetimes stuff can be a PITA.

Learn it, use it, and implement something. Have some fun!

Galaxy S20 security is already old hat as Samsung launches new safety silicon

Brian Miller

Re: A chip helps but doesn't make something secure

The ARM TrustZone is a joke, and it's a rather bad one. If Samsung has implemented their cryptography properly, and if the firmware and OS use it properly, then it goes a long way towards eliminating a lot of threats. Positive identification of a phone really isn't that big of a deal. The big deal is to keep malevolent code from running on the device.

'I wrote Task Manager': Ex-Microsoft programmer Dave Plummer spills the beans

Brian Miller

Why wasn't it in by design?

The one thing I couldn't understand about Windows was why didn't they design in so many good ideas from Unix land? After all, they had Xenix. Apparently they ignored Xenix completely during the development of all of the Windows incarnations. "kill -9" should have a song written about it.

TensorBlow? Data boffins struggle with GPU shortage in Google Cloud, opposition offers to help out coders

Brian Miller

Re: So... the cloud...

No, they're falling on their GPUs.

But really, it's all a non-issue. How much research is really needed into AI recognition of cat videos in order to drive cars and fly airplanes? Just let the cats grab the wheel, and keep the laser pointer steady.

If you don't LARP, you'll cry: Armed fun police swoop to disarm knight-errant spotted patrolling Welsh parkland

Brian Miller

Re: Plague Doctors?

Why worry about that? The "doctor" was wearing a face mask. Since the regulations around my neck of the woods "require" a mask, even if it's a scarf, then anything counts.

Yes, the Darth Vader mask is valid in my book.

Driveway karaoke singer who wanted to lift lockdown spirits cops council noise complaint

Brian Miller

"They call him the streak, fastest thing on two feet ..."

Just remember to run when giving "performances" and then they probably won't know where you live.

(Thanks to Ray Stevens for that song)

DEF CON is canceled... No, for real. The in-person event is canceled. We're not joking. It's canceled. We mean it

Brian Miller

Re: Do you have to dial into their zoom call

Everybody dials into Zoom calls. Those are boring. So are yours. Could you please put something interesting on your computer?

GitHub Codespaces: VS Code was 'designed from the get-go' for this, says Microsoft architect

Brian Miller

Re: And so the rush back to dumb terminals with subscription access continues

Let's see, according to the title, that would mean Multics.

While IBM did have support for TCP and web servers on their mainframes, it was always just insanely expensive. That gave Sun an edge, but that edge was lost when Linux got good enough to do the job. Now it's pretty much all derived from System 7, and an open source reimplementation of System 7. Makes one wonder what it would be like if AT&T had either clamped down from the get-go and never let System 7 out the door, or never paid any attention to K&R's efforts at all.

FYI: Your browser can pick up ultrasonic signals you can't hear, and that sounds like a privacy nightmare to some

Brian Miller

It's the microphone, not the browser

The microphone is doing the conversion of sound waves to electrical signals, not the browser. It would be best to limit the microphone in Android or iOS, not mess with a spec. While there isn't a snowflake's chance of building a ski slope in hell of it happening, it's a better chance than changing a spec or API.

There's a black hole lurking within 1,000 light years of Earth – and you can see stars circling it with the naked eye

Brian Miller

Re: Starman on his way...?

When a black hole enters our solar system, yeah, sure, Starman could go in. However, there's a far likelier chance of one of the Voyager probes taking a dive into one, since both Voyager 1 and 2 have entered interstellar space.