* Posts by Valeyard

527 posts • joined 14 Nov 2012

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UK.gov to press ahead with online smut checks (but expects £10m in legals in year 1)

Valeyard

So what of all the sites hosted in another country?

Oh god, imagine if we were all restricted to british porn. This is the worst-case scenario, and should be the rallying cry for the opposition

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Remember that lost memory stick from Heathrow Airport? The terrorist's wet dream? So does the ICO

Valeyard

Whilst there may be defined patrol routes, the last thing you want is to execute these patrols in a predictable manner,

I agree, and I'm not some joe public here, I've played enough commandos: behind enemy lines to be qualified to have an opinion on this.

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On the seventh anniversary of Steve Jobs' death, we give you 7 times he served humanity and acted as an example to others

Valeyard

diversity

After seeing how much of the company was made up of educated white men, Jobs ensured that there are now just as many chinese children employed by apple as tax attorneys

what a guy

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California cracks down on Internet of Crap passwords with new law to stop the botnets

Valeyard

Re: every device in someone's house beeping like mad

12 o'clock flasher has now been successfully installed into my vocabulary!

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Valeyard

what if other devices emitted a similar alarm once a year, requiring you to check and install any updates before the noise stops?

jesus christ. The article started ok when went deeper and deeper down the tunnel vision "our industry is the only thing that matters!", i stopped reading at every device in someone's house beeping like mad for its update with equal importance as something that ACTUALLY matters like the smoke alarm that's trying to fight for your attention with your out-of-date toaster to tell you that your family might burn to death, that's too far down the autistic spectrum for me.

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Fortnite 'fesses up: New female character's jiggly bits 'unintended' and 'embarrassing'

Valeyard

Re: Obvious question...

QA are already having to triage crash bugs in any game that goes live, over what might be found v what is less likely.

Some guy making a bug that "the boobs bounce" which will mean some remodelling of the digital asset and re-QAing on all its in-game animations will have to sit through the ridicule and jokes that will land shortly after the bug report gets blasted off the system.

For every bug that "gets through QA" there are a thousand worse ones that didn't, QA in games is just about working with the shitty deadlines you have, where even with 50 hours weeks there's not enough time.

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Perfect timing for a two-bank TITSUP: Totally Inexcusable They've Stuffed Up Payday

Valeyard

Re: Outraged of Tunbridge Wells

re-read it. The idea is that she wants to waste money this weekend but doesn't know how much money there is to waste.

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NHS smacks down hundreds of staffers for dodgy use of social media, messaging apps

Valeyard

Re: deeper than that

with pictures of xrays, scans etc. though, do you trust everyone sharing to censor the patient data and various identifiers?

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Valeyard

deeper than that

I know a nurse and she's on some website where they share either academically genuinely interesting or just funny (foreign object anal insertions for the most part) images, x-rays etc. apparently it's pretty popular among NHS staff too.

I can't see how that passes the confidentiality test

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Plusnet customers peeped others' deets during system upgrade

Valeyard

Plusnet

wull do yer prowd

(Except when we don't)

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TSB goes TITSUP: Total Inability To Surprise Users, Probably

Valeyard

The only thing saving TSB is that the general public just can't be bothered switching to another bank, or aren't aware that they can

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Footie fans calling for a red card over West Ham United CC email blunder

Valeyard

start the snowball

Someone on this list needs to reply all

then watch the thousands of "unsubscribe" "please stop" emails crash the mail system

7
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Boss regrets pointing finger at chilled out techie who finished upgrade early

Valeyard

Re: Usually gets worse, the bigger the company ...

you phone up and request a new card. that one dies and the company gets a little redundancy karma

Really though, no project is important enough for me to use my personal payment details. If that means a 6 month delay then so be it

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Who was it that hacked Apple? Ozzie Ozzie Ozzie, boy boy boy!

Valeyard

Re: embezzlement.xls

mine's called "not_embezzlement.xls"

some of us are just born crafty

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Valeyard

brainbleach

RIP the feds that have to go through a 16 year old boy's hard drive

Just gonna be terrabytes of porn

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Hi-de-Hack! Redcoats red-faced as Butlin's holiday camp admits data breach hit 34,000

Valeyard

When houses are empty

Out of all the possibilities it's strange that this is what people focus on.

Between about 8am and 7pm pretty much every house in the area will be empty unless you live in middlesbrough, and I doubt the scallies have taken up phishing over knocking a random door and asking if dave's in, to see if anyone answers the door

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Castaway hacker guilty of sedating children's hospital computers

Valeyard

classic hackivists

simplify everything and jump on the hatewagon.

And yet if the social workers had allowed injured children to go free without any further investigation they'd jump on a baby-P-esque hate brigade instead.

3
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Nah, it won't install: The return of the ad-blocker-blocker

Valeyard

CARS!

I swear to god, trying to get the sales guy from evan halshaw et al to remove the ugly sticker with their name on from the rear window of a car I'm paying good money to buy outright is an ordeal, but it's the line in the sand for me, the walking away point. I know how much advertising is worth; If you want that sticker there you can pay me a fee for the life expectancy of the car.

The only advertising I'll wear or have in my home is something where it's part of what I'm buying, like an old F1 t-shirt or scale model car; I even insist on the correct tobacco advertising rather than have it sanitised away

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Brit tech forges alliance to improve cyber security as MPs moan over 'acute scarcity' of experts

Valeyard

the government doesn't even lead by example

pick a gov.uk website, if you can find a way of reporting security issues I'll buy you a pint

NCSC doesn't count, i've tried that, they're too busy pretending to be a legit company while spying on their own citizens to even bother replying, like a mafia-owned chinese laundry

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You wanna be an alpha... tester of The Register's redesign? Step this way

Valeyard

YES

totally up for this, and it looks really good so far

2
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Fresh cup of WTF with lunch? TeamViewer's big in Twitter's domination-as-a-service scene

Valeyard

To do the same for free...

...leave your laptop unlocked at work and watch just how imaginative your colleagues are

12
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Jimmy Hill feted in Shoreditch

Valeyard

Shingy

Never was there a more legitimate claim for the title of "king of shoreditch" than the imagineer and digital prophet shingy

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'Black hat' extortionist thrown back in the clink after Yelp-slamming biz

Valeyard

Freedom of speech is always the defence of the troll, but slander is a law too which overrides it, and re-targetting a victim is just asking for whatever they can throw at you

11
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Ex-CEO on TalkTalk mega breach: It woz 'old shed' legacy tech wot done it

Valeyard

Re: The digital deficit is coming to get us

yeah probably less "legacy" and more "technical debt"

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Chief EU negotiator tells UK to let souped-up data adequacy dream die

Valeyard

but we're the main offenders

When it comes to mass data collection and the amount of effort a government puts into spying on innocent citizens.. WE'RE the bad guys, the rogue state these laws are specifically and rightfully set up to counter against

why the hell would they give us a waiver

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US judge to Facebook: Nope, facial recognition lawsuit has to go to jury

Valeyard

the problem is that that's where it's all headed

9
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Ubuntu sends crypto-mining apps out of its store and into a tomb

Valeyard

games from ubuntu store?

people download actual games from there? it's good for software, but if you want games you get steam or something; the ubuntu store ones are the card or puzzle games you just knock together over a boring weekend

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Google tweaks Wear OS – yes, it's still around

Valeyard

wat

Google continues to tweak power settings with an "enhanced battery saver mode" in which the radios and clock face are off.

so... "enhanced battery saver mode" == "off button"

3
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Peak smartphone? Phone fatigue hits Western Europe hard

Valeyard

If it works...

My phone was a oneplus one preordered for just over 200 quid 4 years ago, still in use now. The opo 6 is coming out and so far all mine has needed is lineageos for regular security updates.

Hardware is still nicely on-spec, battery will still go a full day, updates weekly with lineage, hits my use case fine.

If it ever dies i can get a 2nd hand one from a few generations later for peanuts and it'll still seem new and blingy to me

Remember the value of money, the cost of waste, and take care of your equipment

And now I'm away to watch my 8 year old tv

15
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TSB's middleware nightmare: Execs grilled on Total Sh*tshow at Bank

Valeyard

QA

everytime the word "testing" is used another QA CV goes out, everyone can see what that particular buck is winging its way

Whether or not it's deserved something must be done, and blaming QA is something, therefore we must blame QA

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Bot-ched security: Chat system hacked to slurp hundreds of thousands of Delta Air Lines, Sears customers' bank cards

Valeyard

Re: What was Delta's outsourced chat doing with cc / cvv?

don't they teach KISS anymore?

needless complexity for complexity's sake isn't a good thing, especially when it touches high-risk data

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UK regulator bans slasher-flick parody ad for OnePlus 5 mobe

Valeyard

so which is it?

OnePlus was told not to broadcast the ad again in its current form, and provide warnings if it does so again.

"please don't do it again. also, since we can't actually stop you please be subtle about it when you do"

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Hackers pwn Baltimore's 911 system?! Quick, someone call 91– doh!

Valeyard

Re: Hearsay?

No it's actually true. Then the hackers put some horrible code in my commit history that broke stuff.

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Facebook supremo Mark Zuckerberg has flunky tell UK MPs: Nope, he's sending someone else

Valeyard

Re: Rule Britannia!

wtf has brexit to do with any of this

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UK smut overlord declares age checks should protect users' privates

Valeyard

so many stolen details

every janky site will be asking people for something like personal data or credit card details or something and the less trustworthy will make free with everything you give them.

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Man who gave interviews about his crimes asks court to delete Google results

Valeyard

Pot meet kettle

He is suing Google for infringing his data protection and privacy rights,

LOL. I have my own theories on who this is, so in my head they must have been biting their tongues when they wrote their case

1
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Huawei's Not Hot Dog is possibly the Worst Tech Promo Ever

Valeyard

Re: FTFY

like when we know there's no such thing as mad cow disease when a politician makes his poor kids eat burgers for the camera

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Flappy Friday for Stack Overflow as outage woes run on

Valeyard

the already-answered questions are very useful but asking your own is just not worth the effort these days

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Valeyard

stack overflow has gone downhill

a few times i've had a question on pointers for how to do something algorithmically - asked for a complete code sample so they can give me a ready-made solution as if i asked for that.. or i've asked to do something without using an external library, all answers were links to libraries

and every response i've had has been needlessly snarky as hell from top-ranked contributors

now i remember why it'd been a 5 year gap since i last posted

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Home fibre in the UK sucks so much it doesn't even rank in Euro study

Valeyard

Re: FTTP

I should probably spend less time on politics Twitter.

words to live by, you'll feel a lot better

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Nervy nuke-armed nation fires missile with 5,000km range

Valeyard

priorities..

We still give around £200 million to India in aid. Looks like either they don't need it or they're fine to spend less on their citizens because they know we'll step in

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Hehe, still writing code for a living? It's 2018. You could be earning x3 as a bug bounty hunter

Valeyard

Title

The thing is that the companies get pentested before going on hackerone etc so the stuff to find is already fairly difficult, after that as soon as a new company is up they're bombarded by some very very good pentesters. A more interesting study would be the median bounty awarded per active user which i suspect would tell a different story...

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Amount of pixels needed to make VR less crap may set your PC on fire

Valeyard

Re: Glasses anyone?

not sure if you're long-sighted, but if you're short sighted you're fine since the objects only look far away but aren't actually. it's like being in a magical world where i can see

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Why did top Home Office civil servant lobby Ofcom for obscure kit ban?

Valeyard

Re: Me: "Oh no you haven't"

Them: "Hi, Home Office PR here"

Is that a new euphemistic name for ass-covering and state-censorship?

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Remember those holy tech wars we used to have? Heh, good times

Valeyard

Re: Um....

OH NO THEY'RE NOT!

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Oops, this article is no longer here

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Carphone Warehouse cops £400k fine after hack exposed 3 MEEELLION folks’ data

Valeyard

Re: Wordpress

even admin on a wordpress install shouldn't do TOO much, but the webshell as plugin through the plugin install feature is as old as the hills, that thing must be ancient

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CPU bug patch saga: Antivirus tools caught with their hands in the Windows cookie jar

Valeyard

Logic

"if you're not using an antivirus" (presumably as then the registry isn't set by it) "then you won't get security updates!"

That's just setting systems up to fail in ways worse than meltdown and spectre, I just can't get my head around that logic at all

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5 reasons why America's Ctrl-Z on net neutrality rules is a GOOD thing

Valeyard

Well The Register made my decision for me, thanks!

I'm gonna ring up my ISP tomorrow and list the porn sites I'd like to grant priority access to

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OK, OK, MIRA-I DID IT: Botnet-building compsci kid comes clean

Valeyard

Re: Not even Putler?

The worst thing is these guys will probably get hired after Club Fed because they are an "IT genius" in some PHB's deluded braincell.

the american security clearance review/appeal documents for real individuals are publicly available, and from those I can safely assume that these guys will never in their lives get a job in IT security for any US gov agency. They don't care how good you are; if you're not completely 100% trustworthy you're out the door, especially in these post-snowden days

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