* Posts by Dr_N

946 posts • joined 12 Nov 2012

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The Iceman cometh, his smartwatch told the cops: Hitman jailed after gizmo links him to Brit gangland slayings

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Re: A high viz vest?

>DoE nearly had the alternative meaning.

Department Of Energy?

The Large Hadron Collider is small beer. Give us billions more for bigger kit, say boffins

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BFCC

A better moniker Shurely?

World's first robot hotel massacres half of its robot staff

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Terminator

I've stayed at one of the Tokyo ones.

It was the least roboty of their 2 hotels in Tokyo. The checkin-bots were a bit scary looking but otherwise a nice enough business hotel.

The "Handy" free 4G phone in each room is useful. As is the LG Steamer Closet. [chortle]

Amazon Mime: We train (badly) an AI love bot using divorce bombshell Bezos' alleged sexts to his new girlfriend

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As someone recently said ...

"What are you, a fucking 8-year-old?"

CES flicks the off switch on massager award… and causes a buzz

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"which looks like a black-and-white photo of a Great Dane turd”

New app oppo: DogEggr

Border guards probe 'suspicious bulge' in man's trousers to find he's packing fluffies

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Security guy was so surprised ...

... he probably had a stroke.

Hope they didn't get ill travelling. Otherwise:

Meow Cats What I Call Mew Sick

My 2019 resolution? Not to buy any of THIS rubbish

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"What are you, a fucking 8-year-old?"

We all need to apply this thinking more, to more areas, in 2019.

Oregon can't stop people from calling themselves engineers, judge rules in Traffic-Light-Math-Gate

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Re: Oregon Engineers

Yeah, I did that over the summer and the "fuel engineer" went ballistic.

Apple blew my mind – literally, says woman: MagSafe plug sparked face-torching blaze, lawsuit claims

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"Ignited the oxygen", eh?

Case dismissed due to scientific ignorance.

Next!

Oz cops investigating screams of 'why don't you die?' find bloke in battle with spider

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Pint

Re: I often wondered...

Beer for Deathworld ref.

The Great British Curry: Put down the takeaway, you're cooking tonight

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I used to cook curries from scratch...

... but now I just use Parampara spice mixes.

Piece of **** to use, even when already 3 sheets.

'Year-long' delay to UK 5G if we spike Huawei deals, say telcos

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Thumb Up

Re: Do we need 5G?

Terry 6> Thing is I do make voice calls. And I've never found a mobile as easy to hear or indeed to hold, as my landline.

https://www.opis-tech.com/en/shop/telphones

No need to thank me.

Happy Yuletide.

London's Gatwick airport suspends all flights after 'multiple' reports of drones

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Re: BBC 1pm news update

"This might be a good time to put one of our large military drones with its really good cameras high over Gatwick.”

They're scared of using buckshot.

Think of the damage that a Watchkeeper will cause when it inevitably crashes !!

Pork pulled: Plug jerked out of beacon of bacon delight

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Japan to the rescue!

All is not lost The Lawson convenience store chain still has their Robo Fried chicken.

Oh Deer! Poacher sentenced to 12 months of regular Bambi screenings in the cooler

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Re: Move to France

>Considering that last season (and the last few years), 90% of victims were hunters, your claims aren't really honest. And hunter can get convicted of manslaughter.

Easy for someone to say if they don't have to run the gauntlet every week.

They rarely even get banned from hunting.

I think one got put away (for a whole 4 months) for the 1st time this year for a murder he committed in 2015.

BTW I'm not anti gun. Everyone should be allowed to carry a sidearm in the French countryside to deter agressive hunters. (The local equivalent of park rangers certainly do.)

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Move to France

He should have moved to France:

Where hunters are free to wander in public with loaded, unbroken weapons and murder mountain bikers and old ladies just sitting in their garden, with very little legal action or jail time imposed.

The Palm Palm: The Derringer of smartphones

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Re: 2nd phone

They used to be offered for built-in 8W carphones, but have long since dropped by the wayside.

You can set call forwarding up to switch between phone when one or the other is off.

Alternatively you can get multiple data SIMs off the same account and just use a voip number.

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Thumb Down

Nice concept!

And good to see someone designing something other than the usual slabs.

Pity about the 8hr battery life and the ridiculous £350 pricetag.

Boffins build blazing battery bonfire

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Trollface

Re: Interesting idea

AC> The fundamental elephants in the room are:

That obvious trolls are obvious?

Oh, I wish it could be Black Friday every day-aayyy, when the wallets start jingling but it's still a week till we're paiii-iid

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Stop

And to those Brits who celebrate Thanksgiving:

Just stop it.

Holy moley! The amp, kelvin and kilogram will never be the same again

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Re: A modest proposal

I thought the kibblegram was the SI measure for weight of useless accumulated dross that people acquire/hoard. (Or that just randomly appears in your house/garage/shed.)

Where to implant my employee microchip? I have the ideal location

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FAIL

Implanting ourselves with animal tagging tech?

How very Captain Cyborg. ™®

And Passé.

AI face recog is where the real money can be wasted.

Townsfolk left deeply unsatisfied by Bury St Edmunds' 'twig' of a Christmas tree

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Trollface

War On Christmas ®™?

Maybe they should have just gone for a big yule log instead.

My hoard of obsolete hardware might be useful… one day

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Pint

Re: Bin it all.

"My existence is supported by the things around me, even when they're no longer of any practical use"

Demijohns of your own urine in the attic to, huh?

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Bin it all.

Just Do It. √

Feels great once you break your compulsive hoarding disorder.

Which scientist should be on the new £50 note? El Reg weighs in – and you should vote, too

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Pint

James Prescott Joule

Icon says it all.

BT: We're stocking warehouses with kit ahead of Brexit to avoid shortages

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Pint

Re: A timely reminder...

"You do realise Scotland is part of the UK? For now at least."

You do know you can get great single malt from a variety of sources outside the UK, right?

Grab a bottle of Yamazaki 12 Year Old.

Woman who hooked up with over 15 spectres has found her forever phantom after whirlwind romance and plane sex

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Phantom Pregnancy

Is that what you get when you play about with goulies?

The Chinese are here: Xiaomi to bring phones to the UK next month

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Re: Excellent phones

Telling MIUI not to battery optimise apps is fairly straight forward.

And if it's still not your cup of tea then there are now the Android One version phones. (I don't like 'em, but can see why people would.)

Sorry friends, I'm afraid I just can't quite afford the Bitcoin to stop that vid from leaking everywhere

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"Hang on... I think I've come up against a snag. "

Fnar.

"singing badly to Nine Inch Nails”

Oh the humanity! I'd pay not to see that.

Erm... what did you say again, dear reader?

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"As a foreign speaker of English ... "

Is it particularly difficult fir Americans?

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Pfffft.

Right?

Silent running: Computer sounds are so '90s

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Re: PC noises

@Antron Argaiv

"every woman in high heels"

So are men in highheels silent?

Highheel Ninja?!

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Re: Ringtones are cringworthy

Rol> Due to my overindulgence of strong white cider

Are 14 year olds allowed to post on here?

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Japanese phone etiquette FTW.

Love Japan's phone etiquette in public spaces.

However Android One's Do Not Disturb feature, in conjunction with Outlook and Skype-for-Business' penchant for turning it on can be annoying in of itself.

"I tried calling you but you didn't answer...."

Gah!

Finally. The palm-sized Palm phone is back. And it will, er, save you from your real smartphone

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Asus Padfone Mini...

Was a better concept. Just needed a smaller handset.

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Thumb Up

Re: A phone from the past

Xperia Mini Pro FTW !!!

Samsung: Swanky hardware alone won't save a phone maker

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Re: £549

I'm not really getting on with my current "Bloatware Free" Mi A2 Lite. (Android One sucks.)

I should have gone for the MIUI Redmi6 Pro version.

I actually like MIUI and its features.

Take my advice: The only safe ID is a fake ID

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Thumb Up

Best Bond Theme

Thanks Alison.

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Coat

I Thought Activ Forte ...

... was a Danone yoghurt?

Workplace services-flinger Sodexo pulls Engage website after division hit by malware smackdown

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Re: Misleading headline

Yes, more of a works canteen company than anything else.

Always a depressing lunchtime when you end up eating at a Sodexo joint.

Why are sat-nav walking directions always so hopeless?

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Re: Tea with milk

>With one exception - coffee in France is horrible unless it's from Starbucks...

You're obviously drinking your coffee with the wrong hand. Or you've confused France with England.

England: Were towns are full of "cafes" all serving stool samples.

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"braised slug provençal"

Mmmm. Nutty.

I want to buy a coffee with an app – how hard can it be?

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Coat

Coffee in the UK....

"Corr! This coffee smells like shit!” ...

(And watch out for labcoat wearers and their "coffee"...)

How an augmented reality tourist guide tried to break my balls

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Trollface

Surprised that ...

... anything could dent your <<glaouis en platine>> Mr Dabbs.

Post-silly season blues leave me bereft of autonomous robot limbs

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Mushroom

and Brexiter politicians fuck off abroad to check on their offshore tax evasion schemes

INCOMING !!!

Activists raise alarm over insidious creep of surveillance in the UK

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Big Brother

Re: As a kid in the 60's

... because you used to pick on her son Melvyn?

'World's favorite airline' favorite among hackers: British Airways site, app hacked for two weeks

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Trollface

AmEx's lines have been engaged all morning

I wonder why?

Voyager 1 left the planet 41 years ago – and SpaceX hopes to land on Earth this Saturday

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Coat

Re: Voyager 1 left the planet 41 years ago. SpaceX hopes to land on it on Saturday

Bof. :-p

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