* Posts by Nolveys

715 posts • joined 6 Nov 2012

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Are you sure your disc drive has stopped rotating, or are you just ignoring the messages?

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: I can believe it!

I work for a company that sends out all their invoices in emails in a batch run every month. The procedure is thus:

1. Print the invoices

2. Scan the printed invoices

3. Email the scanned invoices

4. Bin the invoices

I showed them "print to PDF" once, but there was no interest.

Microsoft partner portal 'exposes 'every' support request filed worldwide' today

Nolveys Silver badge
Meh

Re: File a support request?

An azure support agent will reach out to you.

I don't think that groping will help this situation.

The Iceman cometh, his smartwatch told the cops: Hitman jailed after gizmo links him to Brit gangland slayings

Nolveys Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: Hi-viz bike

The "Professional Hitman Services" along with home phone number in flashing LEDs on the vest didn't help either.

IBM to kill off Watson... Workspace from end of February

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: @Jeffy "...AI tool Watson Workspace..."

President Joe once had a dream

The world held his hand, gave their pledge

So he told them his scheme for a savior machine

They called it the Prayer, its answer was law

Its logic stopped war, gave them food

How they adored till it cried in its boredom

Please don't believe in me, please disagree with me

Life is too easy, a plague seems quite feasible now

Or maybe a war, or I may kill you all

Don't let me stay, don't let me stay

My logic says burn so send me away

Your minds are too green, I despise all I've seen

You can't stake your lives on a savior machine

Come mobile users, gather round and learn how to add up

Nolveys Silver badge
Mushroom

This is why test/development environments and production environments should never be the same network.

That seems to imply that they aren't on the same machine, accessed by the same user account and located in the same directory.

US Department of Defense to fling $1.76bn at Microsoft

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Support for tools, access to knowledgebases, “custom changes to source-code”.

DoD: "If we pay you $1.76B will you make your garbage work properly for us?"

MS: "We can pretend that we will."

SpaceX sends Iridium-8 into space while Musk flaunts his retro rocket

Nolveys Silver badge
Thumb Up

Falcon 9 boosters should be able to manage 10 flights without needing an overhaul, and go for at least 100 flights before retirement.

That is just too cool. Can't wait for the first landing attempt on another world.

Also, I think Starship will look pretty cool once they get the wrinkles out.

Q. How exactly do you test car seats? A. With this sweaty 'robutt' that twerks for days and days

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Last I checked

I was just going to say that they really should use brine if they want to arrive at a valid ass-essment.

Windows 10 Insiders sent on quest deep into Registry to fetch goblet of Reserved Storage

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Kill Windows 10 version of Start Menu

I don't get why people care about the start menu.

They probably try to use their computers to do work, the silly fools.

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: Kill Windows 10 version of Start Menu

Before you've finished typing it has narrowed down the choices and normally has what you're after in the top 1-3.

Or it doesn't find it at all and instead comes up with irrelevant garbage. The funny thing is that the search works pretty well under Windows 7.

Case in point, adding a TAP adapter for OpenVPN. Under Windows 7 start search and "TAP" immediately finds "Add a new TAP virtual ethernet adapter", under 10: No results found for "TAP".

Luckily winkey+r still works (for now).

Mainframe brains-slurper sues IBM for 'age discrim', calls Ginny and biz 'morally bankrupt'

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

A pension is a pay deduction that covers portions of currently-due unfunded liabilities.

Yeesh, even I know that.

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

As a literal greybeard I'm fortunate to be nearing my pension date.

What's a "pension date"?

Despite vows to spend more with smaller firms, UK.gov sure does seem to love legacy lock-in

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: the bad old days of legacy lock-in

Erm correct me if I am wrong but I thought these were the bad days of legacy lock-in.

They've managed to avoid lock-in in recent years by ensuring that each and every government IT project is a dismal failure that gets thrown in the bin.

LA Times knocked out, HackerOne slips up and – amazingly – router security still sucks

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Military, calm

"Right! Everyone can relax, we're here to calm the situation! Men, fire at random in all directions!"

Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-tat...

SpaceX's Crew Dragon shows up at pad 39A, nearly 8 years after the last Shuttle left

Nolveys Silver badge
Thumb Up

Looking Forward To The Manned Flight

Sending real humans into space will be a huge milestone for SpaceX and commercial space flight in general. I've been looking forward to it ever since I first heard of Dragon. Once they pull it off I think things will get very interesting.

Best of luck to all involved.

Nolveys Silver badge
Devil

Re: Simon Harris Excellent stuff!

I mean how hard is it to make out the rocket as a phallic symbol?

It's very, very...hard.

New Horizons snaps finish buffering: Ultima Thule actually two dust bunnies that got snuggly 4.5 billion years ago

Nolveys Silver badge

There is no Stay Puft, there is only THULE!

Oz cops investigating screams of 'why don't you die?' find bloke in battle with spider

Nolveys Silver badge
Mushroom

Re: Spiders: there is no "overkill"

I fully endorse the use of flamethrowers to eradicate them

You wouldn't happen to live in Fresno, California, would you?

Nolveys Silver badge

Microsoft's 2018, part 1: Open source, wobbly Windows and everyone's going to the cloud

Nolveys Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Windows 10 S (The "S" Stands For SssssssFUN!)

I can't get the VPN software to work.

Okay, just get TeamViewer going and I'll take a look...

It's 2019, the year Blade Runner takes place: I can has flying cars?

Nolveys Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: I have written to my bank

TWAT

That works too.

In 2018, Facebook is the villain and Microsoft the shining light, according to techies

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

What is this on about?

This article is bizarre.

Facebook is the new Microsoft

Where did this come from? Their markets are almost completely disjoint. Almost the entire tech industry can be described as utterly morally bankrupt Orwellian snake pits from hell, but that's hardly equivalency.

the Zuckerberg-front ad machine was once a beacon of all that was great and wonderful about social media

Facebook as been a cynical surveillance nightmare platform since day one. "I don't know why they trust me, dumb fucks" - Mark Zuckerberg. Anyone who thought otherwise should realize by this point that they were duped.

And the shining light? Microsoft; Microsoft; companies fighting backdoors into encryption; Microsoft.

Microsoft is pushing its cloud platform hard and international customers trust the US government even less than US citizens do. Customers not having a modicum of trust that everything they send through the platform won't be perused by Uncle Sam will directly effect the bottom line. They don't now, never have and never will give a shit about doing the right thing.

Facebook isn't in this market or any other market that requires an appearance of trust. Microsoft's actions in the specific cases of mentioned in the article are specific to business income. They have proven through Windows 10 that they are perfectly willing to invade privacy, use people as beta (alpha?) testers and basically take possession of privately owned PCs.

Both Microsoft and Facebook have been giant piles of thieving, parasitic garbage since day one and will continue to be so until they eventually become as irrelevant as IBM* and MySpace. Hopefully that will happen sooner rather than later, but I'm not holding my breath in Microsoft's case.

* Irrelevant in most areas. Will probably still be doing big iron and getting paid huge money to support horrible platforms when I pass.

China on its way to becoming the first nation to land on the far side of the Moon

Nolveys Silver badge
Trollface

It's a good thing...

...that on the way to the far side of the Moon they didn't try to transfer in Canada.

Best of luck to China in this endeavor. This will be quite an accomplishment if they pull it off.

Funnily enough, China fuming, senator cheering after Huawei CFO cuffed by Canadian cops at Uncle Sam's request

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: the Canadian president Justin Trudeau

Shirley you meant Prime Minister.

I don't know who came up with the idea of grading politicians in terms of deliciousness.

Google: I don't know why you say Allo, I say goodbye

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Google treats it commercial offerings differently.

Yeah, instead of throwing the products under the bus completely they change the interfaces into garbage either slowly or quickly.

Naked women cleaning biz smashes patriarchy by introducing naked bloke gardening service

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: You're born that way, you die that way...

"And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return there"

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Lenovo superdishes not-so-superdosh for Superfish superloss: $40 waiting for you if you bought adware laptop

Nolveys Silver badge

As I recall Lenovo put information in the uefi that windows reads on boot. Windows then dutifully installs malware, even if it's a fresh install.

We all fall together. Azure MFA takes a tumble for the second week running

Nolveys Silver badge

At least it's secure

We contacted Microsoft to find out what had become of the service and the lessons learned from last week, but have yet receive a response.

They'll get back to you once they can access their email again.

Office 365 Exchange enjoys a less than manic Monday. Users? Not so much

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: Echoing in Redmond

"Oh for fuck's sake, Bob! I just did the Days Since Last Outage sign"

Reminds me of an episode of Futurama in which Fry updates the "Days Since Last Accident" sign by nailing a piece of paper with a "1" on it to the sign. Immediately after he finishes putting up the "1" he realizes that he put the nail through his thumb.

Great Scott! Is nothing sacred? US movie-goers vote Back To The Future as most-wanted reboot

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: originals will still be enjoyable

They should make a new version of Star Wars Holiday Special - I want to see the funny shenanigans of Jar Jar and his family!

Remember to get the deluxe edition. It comes with a bottle of whisky and a hand gun.

Microsoft: You looking at me funny? Oh, you just want to sign in

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Nifty!

I've got Edge fired up and my FIDO2 dongle. Let's give this a try...

(Azure Europe overloads)

(Azure Europe goes down)

(Azure Europe fails over to Azure North America)

(Azure North America overloads)

(Azure North America goes down)

(Azure North America fails over to Azure Asia)

(Azure Asia overloads)...

Uh-oh.

New era for Japan, familiar problems: Microsoft withdraws crash-tastic patches

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: year zero , all over again

Previous Windows versions maintained the system clock in local time, but I thought they'd got that right from W7, if not before?

Since NT they've used 100-nanosecond intervals since January 1, 1601 (UTC).

Microsoft confirms: We fixed Azure by turning it off and on again. PS: Office 362 is still borked

Nolveys Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Hmmmm

What kind of back-end service needs to connect to the Multi-Factor Authentication Service?

Don't all Microsoft services count as "back-end"?

Oz lad 'fell in love with' baby meerkat, nicked it from zoo, took it out for a romantic Big Mac

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: He got off lightly compared to Tufty.

red squirrels harbor the leprosy bacteria

Red squirrels make for good eatin', you can really taste the leprosy.

Junior dev decides to clear space for brewing boss, doesn't know what 'LDF' is, sooo...

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Killing a database?

There are two types of people in the world, those who think they are paranoid enough and those who know they are not.

DXC: Everything is going to plan, too well in fact... we've chopped so many staff, our IT projects are now behind

Nolveys Silver badge
Headmaster

As a business strategy, murdering their employees will see diminishing returns.

IBM struggles to sign up shipping carriers to blockchain supply chain platform – reports

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Shocked

You mean you can't just slap "blockchain" on something and watch the money roll in?

Blockchain is already old hat. Blockchain AI is the way of the future.

From dank memes to Krispy Kremes: British uni eggheads claim viral lol pics make kids fat

Nolveys Silver badge
Headmaster

there is always somebody who is thinner than average

Not true, only 50% of the time.

Once more with feeling: Windows 10 October 2018 Update inches closer to relaunch

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: I'm just wondering

Constant uproar in the IT area of a company will inevitably have consequences on revenue at some point.

I doubt it. MS has been sodomizing their "customers" for decades and the customers just keep coming back for more.

It's like watching an episode of "COPS" (is that still a thing?) where the police go on a domestic. There's some mullet-headed grease ball and a burn-out woman with an eye swollen shut, blood everywhere and teeth missing saying "Bobby-Joe done did this, but he don't mean it! He loves me!" The sane thing for her to do would be to go to a woman's shelter and sort her life out, but you just know that she'll stay with Bobby-Joe and receive regular beatings for ever and ever.

It doesn't matter what happens to them, the people who make the software purchasing decisions will always jump at the opportunity to skip gleefully through the gates of hell. And you know what? I'm fine with it.

I used to hate this state of affairs, but at some point I realized that being paid by the hour to fix a perpetual nuclear cluster-fuck ain't that bad. The trick is to abandon all hope for the future of computing. Just crank the cynicism to 11 and set the "rapetastic hourly rate" toggle switch to the on position.

Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella is worth 154 median minions

Nolveys Silver badge
Trollface

Re: You keep using that word...

Can people please stop using the words "worth" or "earned" to describe how much CEOs and others of their ilk pay themselves and each other?

But SatNad did such a good job on Windows 10.

Open-source this, open-source that, and the end of the Windows 10 Creators Update

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: Too True.....

Does it shite, it worked perfectly in 7, to the point where winkey+type became an unconcious action. In 10 it became winkey+type... wait a bit while 10 stirs itself from a cloudy stupor...

The trick is to adjust your own personal timing to match the timing of the UI. 750ml of vodka will get you there*.

* Until your tolerance builds.

Nolveys Silver badge
Gimp

Re: Too True.....

Far more reliable to do win-r and type the actual name of the executable and ignore the start menu completely...

Doesn't seem to work too well for running things as administrator. I've taken to right-clicking on the desktop and creating a shortcut to cmd.exe and then right-clicking on that and running as administrator.

I'd love if there were a more "win+r"-ish way to do this. Any suggestions?

Microsoft Windows 10 October update giving HP users BSOD

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Shove It Out The Door

As much as I hate Microsoft (and I do), this seems to be a symptom of some larger problem. Almost everything these days seems to be loaded with high-tech features that are of use to no one, are poorly or not-at-all tested and have bloated, broken and idiotic UIs.

There was a time when vacuum cleaners were made like tanks. There are probably perfectly functioning vacuum cleaners under 50 years of garbage accumulation out in the landfills of western civilization. The companies that made these vacuum cleaners are pretty much all long gone, once people had their tank-vacuums then they didn't ever need any new vacuums and the companies went out of business.

Over time durable goods became less and less durable as the time between one sale and the next depends on lack of durability. Now it is almost impossible to purchase anything that isn't garbage.

Of course software is not a durable good, but it seems to to be following the same pattern. Slap something together, make it pretty (for very strange values of "pretty"), load it up with bullshit and shove it out the door. Fitness for purpose isn't an afterthought, it's never thought of at all.

Something has gone very wrong.

Uncle Sam gives itself the right to shoot down any drone, anywhere, any time, any how

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: Inevitable

Is yout civilian aircraft a drone if autopilot engaged?

That depends on who or what the autopilot is getting married to.

NSA dev in the clink for 5.5 years after letting Kaspersky, allegedly Russia slurp US exploits

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: Kaspersky 'Standalone Virus Removal Tool'

AC: Interesting posts. Would upvote if I could easily find verification. Sadly, a quick search of Google through a haze of vodka doesn't yield results.

5 years at 68 has to suck hard, not much paper left on the bog roll at that point. Maybe just stupidity and a love for his work? Maybe supervisors wanting more than he could provide without doing some work on the sly? I'm not smelling a lot of malice, but I'm also not feeling particularly informed.

My advice: only work for the government if you make obscene amounts of money and never ever do any actual work.

Cookie clutter: Chrome saves Google cookies from cookie jar purges

Nolveys Silver badge
Big Brother

The Fonz Vs The Sharknado

Back in the early zeros Google could do no wrong. Their services were excellent, sometimes even revolutionary. They generally seemed to act with some measure of morality, or at least not in the despicable way that typified most of the rest of the computing industry.

Then they jumped the shark.

Now we have deteriorating services, increasingly shady practices and slime-ball antics. Just a few short years ago an article like this would come out only once or twice a month. Now it's every day, and the "creepy asshole" factor is through the roof. The rate of decay is accelerating.

If you work in anything web-related then Google is almost completely unavoidable. Many platforms have hard dependencies on Google Maps and Google tracking services. This doesn't seem to be getting better as it becomes more and more blatantly obvious what Google is really about.

Google has already turned into a creepy nightmare from hell. I really don't want to think where we will find ourselves in ten years time.

Facebook sued for exposing content moderators to Facebook

Nolveys Silver badge

Re: You can find right wingers saying the same thing

Although I still haven't figured out what the actually definitions of left wing and right wing.

Those are two groups that are pitted against each other in order to distract the public.

A spot of Python in your Azure automation? Step right this way, sir

Nolveys Silver badge
Windows

Re: Python 2 support

print as a function still kicks my ass though.

I'm still on 2, but I have finally kicked my parentheses-less print habit.

Git it girl! Academy tries to tempt women into coding with free course

Nolveys Silver badge

Female programmers are badly needed

If only men are employed as programmers then there won't be enough people to outsource.

Sextortion scum armed with leaked credentials are persistent pests

Nolveys Silver badge
Trollface

Meanwhile, in Scotland...

"Honey, look at the email these fools sent me! They think they can extort money from me by claiming that they have a video of me pleasuring myself to internet porn! How silly is that?"

"Baaaaa!"

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