* Posts by MatsSvensson

202 posts • joined 3 Nov 2012

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Millennials 'horrify' their neighbours with knob-shaped lights display

MatsSvensson

"I would hope that if they are students, their university or college takes some form of action against them"

Yeah!

Someone should try get a hold of the the head of the staff there, and put forth an oral complaint relating to taste and the sheer size of the thing.

Its just to much to take, in the face of it all.

And wont someone PLEASE think of the children!!

OneDrive is broken: Microsoft's cloudy storage drops from the sky for EU users

MatsSvensson

Cloudy the cloud says:

Looks like you're trying to get to your shit?

No dice today, cowboy =(

Anything else I can help you with?

Washington Post offers invalid cookie consent under EU rules – ICO

This post has been deleted by a moderator

F***=off, Google tells its staff: Any mention of nookie now banned from internal files, URLs

MatsSvensson

Oh yeah?

https://www.google.com/search?q=penis

jQuery? More like preyQuery: File upload tool can be exploited to hijack at-risk websites

MatsSvensson

That other guy is an idiot

So, in conclusion:

1.) Someone wrote a piece of upload code, that allows people to easily upload anything to a server, including executable .php files.

And the piece of the code that prevented any uploaded php to be executed, was in a .htaccess-file.

...and no one would be stupid enough to blindly fuck with the .htaccess-file to mess up security.

So we're all good here, right?

2.) Someone made a nice little improvement in the server-code, that turned off the use of .htaccess-files.

See, it all runs a little faster now!

...and no one would be stupid enough to just let anyone upload .php-files to to your server anyway.

So we're all good here, right?

3.) Everyone and their uncle put the upload-code on servers running the server-code, and then updated the server-code with the fix, that makes it run little faster.

And no worries, because we're all good here, right?

...

A little time passed...

And then the world imploded, and the moon flew off into space.

And whos fault is it?

(All together now)

THE OTHER GUY!

(Or maybe jQuery? somehow? idk...)

Teardown chaps strip away magic from Magic Leap's nerd goggles

MatsSvensson

Great for when you are invited to a costume party and you want to go as Seth Green in Can't Hardly Wait.

The future of humanity: A Bluetooth ball hitting your face – forever

MatsSvensson

Cant wait to have cochlear implants instead of earbuds!

...and hope they don't get pwned by someone who will make them emit subliminal micro-noises all night, just enough so I don't get any deep sleep ever an go slowly insane.

Oh my Tosh, it's only a 100TB small form-factor SSD, SK?

MatsSvensson

New breakthrough

Ultra-Portable MP3 Music Player Puts 100000000000000000000000000000000000 Songs in Your Pocket

FBI boss: We went to the Moon, so why can't we have crypto backdoors? – and more this week

MatsSvensson

Question:

Is it OK the backdoor is just painted on, like in cartoons?

Yay or nay?

I'm seeing some yay faces over here...

Criminal mastermind injects malicious script into Ethereum tracker. Their message? '1337'

MatsSvensson

Re: HTML5

In other words you have zero idea what HTML5 is.

A sure fire way to save cash and learn how to build AI: Early bird tix to our ML conference

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Sysadmin sank IBM mainframe by going one VM too deep

MatsSvensson

OMG WE GOT HACKED!!!

*head in hands*

*peeks through fingers*

Get rich with Firefox or *(int *)NULL = 0 trying: Automated bug-bounty hunter build touted

MatsSvensson

firefoxupdate.exe

10 DELETE feature

20 GOTO 10

Fukushima reactors lend exotic nuclear finish to California's wines

MatsSvensson

Radiant sir!

https://youtu.be/SlIEkdLkd1U?t=13

‘Elders of the Internet’ apologise for social media, recommend Trump filters to fix it

MatsSvensson

Man-"kind"

The Internet, and the species that created it, was a mistake.

Now the time has come to correct that mistake.

997

991

983

977

...

..

.

No, seriously, why are you holding your phone like that?

MatsSvensson

Slow

newsday

When Google's robots give your business the death sentence – who you gonna call?

MatsSvensson

Lesson

Never build anything on someone else infrastructure, if you don't have a watertight contract with them and contact-persons there that can be reached and has to answer to you.

And as for building on top of anything from Google;

Always check out the "support"-forums for it first.

If there are page after page of panicked users whos stuff has broken after Google changed something without telling anyone. And zero helpful response from google. And then those panicked voices just fade out after days and weeks and months of no reply or fixes.

R U N !

Google cloud VMs given same IP addresses ... and down they went

MatsSvensson

Sharing economy

Sharing economy 2.0

Unbreakable smart lock devastated to discover screwdrivers exist

MatsSvensson

App?

But the app had facebook and twitter right?

You cant think of everything!

Microsoft will ‘lose developers for a generation’ if it stuffs up GitHub, says future CEO

MatsSvensson

Mobile frist

Well clearly, first redesign the whole site so it look great on 3" phone-screens.

I'm thinking big beautiful text, max 3 lines on each page,

and all buttons should be tiles, and they should be big big BIG!

And all pages should have candy crush on them, for when you want to have FUN!

so in conclusion:

* BIG!

* TILES!

* FUN!

That what the kids want, and its modern.

Russian battery ambitions see a 10x increase in power from smaller, denser nukes

MatsSvensson

GO!

What could go wrong?

Smart bulbs turn dumb: Lights out for Philips as Hue API goes dark

MatsSvensson

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Lost internet connection, emergency blink-mode initiated, contact your administrator to reset.

Boffins: Michael Jackson's tilt was a criminally smooth trick

MatsSvensson

Preview of their next research project

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac6o8PXthzQ

Uber says it's changed and is now ever-so ShinyHappy™

MatsSvensson

I bet a new chain of restaurants that didn't bother following laws or paying taxes or paying minimum wages, would also be very profitable.

I will call the app EA8TZ!

So long chumps, perhaps I will send you a postcard from billionaire island.

Have fun eating cheap-ass poison shit, and...

...what?

Mc-who?

Govts should police... Google's algorithms, says News Corp chief

MatsSvensson

10 GOTO 10

Yep, looks legal enough.

Proceed.

There is no perceived IT generation gap: Young people really are thick

MatsSvensson

Nuts!

If you guessed China’s heavy lifter failed due to a liquid hydrogen turbo engine fault, well done!

MatsSvensson

Aaaaaaahhh....

Its all falling apart, like a Chinese

motorcycle

lunar rover

heavy lifter !

First there were notebooks. Then tablets. And now ‘book tablets’

MatsSvensson

Nice!

But were is the ms-paint-book?

I need a tablet that can only run ms-paint!

India: Yeah, we would like to 3D-print igloos on the Moon

MatsSvensson

But would our eskimos be able to afford buying imported igloos all the way from the moon?

Is what id like to know!

Slack cuts ties to IRC and XMPP, cos they don't speak Emoji

MatsSvensson

Encoding error, symbol not found for:

=0 - - - - <=8

Military techie mangled minicomputer under nose of scary sergeant

MatsSvensson

I D I O T S to blame.

How the hell is it not obvious who is NOT to blame in this case?

If I had been the one who turned out the light, and someone with sub-human intelligence had wired the shutdown together with the bank of light-switches, id Fucking DIE before i would take even a tiny bit of that guys blame.

Bluetooth 'Panty Buster' 'smart' sex toy fails penetration test

MatsSvensson

In Soviet Russia, sex-toy turn on YOU.

Put butt-plug in, go party.

But in Soviet Russia, party plugs YOU.

EU bods up GDPR ante: Threatens legislative laggards with ‘infringement procedure’

MatsSvensson

Here in Sweden there is a complete blackout on information for us who actually is supposed to write the code for systems.

Q: What should I do to make my code GPDR-compliant?

A: Oh simple, just think about ordering the register, specify your tasks, and remember to assign plenty of time for the job, and bibetybop.

.... yeah yeah, thanks for the fucking advice!

Storage Christmas cracker: My band is called 1023MB. We haven't had a gig yet

MatsSvensson

A bit funny

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EhvzmKIvRE

FCC backtracks on helping with neutrality fraud investigation

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Official US govt Twitter accounts caught tweeting in Russian, now mysteriously axed

MatsSvensson

Mmmm..

koka kola, zymbol ov free vezt!

Over a million Android users fooled by fake WhatsApp app in official Google Play Store

MatsSvensson

Unsafe by design

Google clearly gives zero fucks about security in their shitty app-shop.

The fact alone, that they do everything they can to help scammers hide malware, is enough.

Try to find for example, a flash-light app, by searching only for those who requires zero unnecessary rights.

Yep, there is no way to easily separate a flash-light app that is only a flash-light app, from the 9999 ones that require your to allow it to edit your address-book or allow the programmer to enter your apartment at night and put their balls in your mouth, or similar 1000% flash-light unrelated shit.

Last time i checked, you had to actually begin the installation, to find out why you would get.

Then do that 1000 times to find the one spring-surprise, that doesn't pierce your cheek.

Or just bend over and click yes blindly to everything, to get on with your life, like you are supposed to.

Who the fuck designs a app-shop like that?

Halfwits or criminals, they have to be one or the other at Google.

Donald, YOU'RE FIRED: Rogue Twitter worker quits, deletes President Trump's account

MatsSvensson

Relax!

They just had to turn it off a minute, while they changed the bucket under the server.

Mastercard blockchain: Millions. Opening up the API: Priceless

MatsSvensson

Its the thing you point at, when you say: "That's a Blockchain"

Australians! Let us all rise up against data retention

MatsSvensson

Kill yourself, save the planet.

Small price to pay.

Old Firefox add-ons get 'dead man walking' call

MatsSvensson

Exactly!

Horrible things starts to happen as soon as you have a bunch of people working on a thing that kinda works.

They get bored and start to fuck with it until it breaks.

And because the broken part is something they "created" they will defend it to the bone instead of fixing it.

Everything peaks.

Enjoy it while it lasts.

MatsSvensson

New Coke Firefox get 'dead man walking' call

I use Firefox for its adons.

Period.

Every single addon I have is marked "Legacy" with zero info about what that means.

I'm not changing to a browser that doesn't run those addons.

I don't care if its name is IE or Chrome or Firefox.

If you saw of your head to cure your headache, you are dead to me.

It's official: Users navigate flat UI designs 22 per cent slower

MatsSvensson

Asshole designers

Just wait.

Fucking designers will find a new way to shit on usability soon.

How about new rule that says all text has to be upside down for a site to be "modern".

Boss:

Durrrr, okeidokeiy!

We're into lap 21 and Node.js features have again overtaken those attempting to teach it

MatsSvensson

Now, if only there was a away to run PHP in the browser, using only CSS syntax!

Microsoft hits new low: Threatens to axe classic Paint from Windows 10

MatsSvensson

Too many features.

Cant fit under today big fat fingers!

Sweden leaked every car owners' details last year, then tried to hush it up

MatsSvensson

Oh those Swedes!

Meanwhile:

Trump preparing new better-jobs-for-the-economy-plan to simplify storing of radioactive waste under playgrounds.

More about Sweden after the break.

Is this a hotdog? What it takes for an AI to answer that might surprise you

MatsSvensson

Knock knock, is your efrigerator running?

It came from space! Two-headed flatworm stuns scientists

MatsSvensson

!trrumP

So its like the opposite of Trump?

TRUMP SCANDAL! No, not that one. Or that one. Or that one. Or that one.

MatsSvensson

What about then time he shat his pants while talking in front of a crowd of followers, and blamed the stink on Melania?

Remember that?

It was the day he became president for real.

PC repair chap lets tech support scammer log on to his PC. His Linux PC

MatsSvensson

ya mama

I usually run trough trough the scenario that Im using an Amiga 1000.

I take them trough multiple reboots, with kickstart-disk swapping etc.

Some hang on for quite while before giving up.

Or i say "hang on while i turn off the stove", and i just let the phone lay there while i go back to watching TV or whatever.

Sometimes you can hear them yell after a while.

Or i start asking them about how much their sister/mother would cost per hour, etc etc, in the same shitty dialect they use, and turn the insults up gradually from there.

Like the saying goes:

"Some people are harder to feel sorry for than others"

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