* Posts by Longrod_von_Hugendong

414 publicly visible posts • joined 2 Nov 2012

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Sea Launch comsat rocket goes titsup 40 seconds into launch

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Joke

Looks like....

It ran out of fuel :D - should have made sure it was full before it left.

Google's Glasses: The tech with specs appeal?

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Devil

To sum the article...

1) Wants to be the naked office rambler

2) oh, there is no other content really.

3) Five minutes of my life i would like back.

Still its friday, so might find time for some fermented vegetable products.

Netbooks were a GOOD thing and we threw them under a bus

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Coat

You want....

quick, cheap and battery life - you are only ever going to get 2 of those....

By the sound of it, you really want a Mac Book Air....

WORLD temporarily FREED from BURDEN of TWITTER!

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Holmes

I have a friend...

Who is from another European country, who is doing a placement year in New York, and her quote about America sums this up perfectly.

'America, 3rd world country'

How to destroy a brand-new Samsung laptop: Boot Linux on it

Longrod_von_Hugendong
WTF?

An Apple a day...

keeps shite korean rubbish away.

Also, for the windoze tards that cannot read (because of finger prints on the screen maybe?) / didnt bother to read the article, its a firmware issue, not an OS issue.

Is your Surface Pro a bit full? Slot in an SD card, it's not from Apple

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Holmes

Lets try to put this in to some context...

The best think about surface pro is it has an SD card slot, you cannot do anything else with it - do to lack of apps and support, but you *can* put a SD Card in it, well fcuk me sideways.

The worse thing about Apple iPad is it doesnt have a SD card slot. I have an iPad 64 gig, still never managed to fill it, so i dont really care - since i can do so much else with it, since its the best and most popular thing on the market.

Cheap and nasty driod tablets - ewww for touching one - latched on to this USP (lol) early on, when the could tone down specs and let the users upgrade as and when required.

So now, we let the downvoters have a go - i wonder what the lowest downvoted post is? This one by tomorrow. Its funny how the do-no-evil-andrio has the most haters-fandois, probably cos they know they are cheap copies of the real thing. ho hum, is it friday yet?

Worst broadband notspots in the UK named and shamed

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Thumb Up

We lived in Aberdeen City centre

That speed is bollocks, we were down to <2 Mbps at that time of night, nothing would stream at all, had nothing but buffering.

Speeds have been much better since we move out side the city, plus less people drunk and fighting outside the windows, or getting heads stuck in bins.

Apple 'dismayed' to find over 100 kids building its iDevices

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Devil

Re: Could this be translated into sales ?

I would be quite happy to pay extra for things that are not built in the dodgy parts of the far east, nor do i really want anything to do with China, but needs must when the devil drives.

Devil for obvious reasons...

Brit 2.5-tonne nuke calculator is World's Oldest Working Computer

Longrod_von_Hugendong

Still better speed...

than most versions of windows. :D

In all seriousness, they did a fantastic job of recovery and restoration to make sure an important machine is kept for future generations to enjoy and learn from.

Have Brits fallen for Netflix, or do they still LoveFilm?

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Thumb Up

We have both...

You are spot on Netflix bette for TV, and love film for films and DVD's for TV programs that neither have.

In total we spend £16-ish to have the best of both worlds. The way I look at it - to have both is the same price as a basic sky subscription, without having to deal with 30mins of ads for every hour of TV. My wife likes the soaps and thats the only time the TV is on for broadcasted TV.

We are really happy, but then again our broadband connection is pretty stable, fast and unlimited*.

* blah blah blah its not really blah blah blah - dont care because i don't torrent stuff i watch.

Panasonic: We'll save Earth by turning CO2 into booze

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Devil

News flash from 25 years in the future...

Global problems as all the trees are dying because there is no CO2 in the atmosphere since its all been converted to power cars...

'We are not concerned about your patents at all' - Jobs

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Coat

Re: "TV series starring Adam West-starring series"

You answered your own question there..

Sympathetic Scots scoff-house offers hard-up Apple fanbois a discount

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Go

I am just surprised...

How many of us live in Aberdeen, seems quite bizarre. Mind you i would want 20% to head into that part of town. I used to live in that general area, so have experience of head-stuck-in-bin-man, i had issue an attitude adjustment after one of the castlegate dunks gave my then girlfriend some hassle. (She is not my girlfriend any more, she is now wife - before anyone thinks otherwise :D)

Oh, those crazy Frenchies: Facebook faces family photo tax in France

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Mushroom

Mind you...

If the companies threaten not to pay, the french will surrender anyway, so problem solved.

Microsoft blasts PC makers: It's YOUR fault Windows 8 crash landed

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Facepalm

M$ has done exactly...

what i said they shouldn't - release expensive, high end products - The nix tablets tried it and it failed badly at the start (then figured out if you copy apple you stand far more chance), palm tried it and it failed, how much more evidence do you need not to repeat the same mistakes?

Not matter how good you think you are the public doesnt believe you - they buy apple if they can afford it.

Should have released at £150 for that much i would have bought one, for the same price an an iPad i would upgrade my iPad to the latest version.

(I will just wait for the flames now from the driod folk. :D - but its true never the less)

UK 4G auction kicks off in total silence

Longrod_von_Hugendong
WTF?

Americans already pay a good deal more than Brits

Just because Americans are stu..., err sorry i mean putting up with it, doesnt mean us brits will. EE et al can shove 4G for that price, not only that- we dont even have 3G where i live, so i doubt 4G will be here before next century, which is odd because over twitter i am assured that my telecoms company is spending £1.5m per day on network improvements, i did ask what exactly they were spending it on, i am still waiting for an answer.

iPhone hangs on in US, Japan, but EVERYONE ELSE bought an Android

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

my next phone...

is probably not going to be an iPhone, after seeing how my wifes 10 week old iPhone 5 is damaging. For a £500 phone its crap, Apple says - nothing we can do, its still working. I will be glad when Tim cook gets booted, Apple is going down the pan since Steve left us.

Review: Infiniti M35h hybrid sports saloon

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Angel

Well lets put this way...

You got 33.6 mpg, i have a Jeep Grand Cherokee - probably the same cost-ish, its a V8, does 26 mpg, will go up the side of a mountain, drives on snow like its a dry tarmac road - why the fcuk would i buy that Datsun

??? or anything else that is not 4x4, i can never figure out why people have normal cars. In fairness I live on a farm, and i actually do use it off road.

(Ok, ignoring the fact the Jeep has the worlds worse interior - which is admittedly bullet proof but feels stupidly cheap, and dont mention the fact it produces a *bit* more Co2 than the Datsun, but probably less than my boat did.)

How to build a BONKERS 7.5TB, 10GbE test lab for under £60,000

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Holmes

zOMFG....

i stopped reading once it was mentioned using windoze, go and get a real OS, then we can talk.

I cannot decide whether to use Fail, WTF or paris - think i will go with Sherlock, since i think some clue needs to be found...

Look out, fanbois: One in two nicked mobes is an iPhone - cops

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Devil

Here is a wizard wheeze...

Get a broken phone, remove innards - replace with a remote detonated bomb, wait for it to be stolen - then no iPhone was stolen and the mugger / braggart wont do it again... cheaper and better than sending them to prison!!

Raise a beer: Titans of tech fill out 'Worst CEOs' list

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Why not...

just list them? I want to know who they are not read the waffle as to why, we are going to know the why.

'Leccy-starved Reg hack: 'How I survive on 1.5kW'

Longrod_von_Hugendong
WTF?

I think the problem is...

'an advanced 21st century Western civilisation'

When has Spain ever been an 'advanced civilisation'

There is your problem.

'Not even Santa could save Microsoft's Windows 8'

Longrod_von_Hugendong

You got the title wrong...

Should be even Satan couldnt help windoze 8. Its such a bad fail we will point out for years how a tech company like M$ could create should a pile of shite.

Mega-res telly demand to boom, say ball-gazers

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Holmes

You will have to wait...

until apple make one, then Samsung et al will copy it, then you will have large hi-def tv's

Thats the way it works now, Apple invents and Korea copies.

(and yes, i am aware the truth will cause many down votes)

Forget value-added broker jokes: Could YOU shift nuclear plant scrap?

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

oh my god

I forwarded straight to the comments, in hope that they would contain something of entertainment - unlike that article.

wish you had a ZZZZZZZ icon for sleepy teims.

Wikipedia doesn't need your money - so why does it keep pestering you?

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Facepalm

*** STOP PRESS *** Business makes money.

1) There is no such thing as a non profit making business, they are non-profit *distributing* businesses, they still need more money than they spend, those profit may or may not end up somewhere you dont want. Oxfam's director get paid how much? Company car much? Last time i checked, it was around 100K per year + plus a charity funded BMW 7 Series, needless to say, i dont give to them.

2) A company can never have too much cash, they are always on the look out for more, money is like oxygen - you always want to make sure you have a good supply that can never run out.

3) I am sure the government looks at how much is donated then increases tax, since if you have that much spare cash then you can pay more tax.

Apple: What do our Maps need? Stalk-yer-buddies Foursquare tech, NATCH!

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Suspect this is bollocks...

Since they already have 'find my friends'

But they really do need to update maps, of all the faults on the map around where i live, none have been fixed. I have reported all of them.

Hard-up Brit bankers bag endless free Wi-Fi during cig breaks

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Free as in not really...

So, they collect your email address at each hotspot, so they track you around - and show you adverts...

Thats not free at all, enjoy Murdock tracking you all.

END OF THE WORLD IS NIGH: TalkTalk no longer worst ISP in UK

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Facepalm

Its a 2 way street,

i have been with many providers that people say are shit, blah blah blah - i have never had a problem with them at all. Maybe being a competent user helps :D Mind you i do hate offshore call centres as well - especially when they have made up western names, hello my name is Dave - fcuk of is it.

i think this explains it better - http://theoatmeal.com/comics/customer_service

Google maps app is BACK on iPhones, fanbois spared death

Longrod_von_Hugendong

I just installed it...

and removed the tick from 'track the crap out of me, whilst feeding in me adverts' and i didnt log in to my google account.

As for the outback navigation problems, it should read...

'I nearly died because my family has bred a little too closely, so i am dumb ass country bumpkin, who cannot follow signs or common sense '

Xamarin tool lets devs build .Net apps for Mac OS X

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Had a look at it...

Priced to scare, do not want.

YES! It's the TARDIS PC!

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

I am sorry but...

designed by TARDS For TARDS.

OMG: RIM adds VoIP to its stealth social network

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Its terrible...

BB are dead, they just dont know it yet... its sad to watch really.

Apple's iOS 6 maps STILL muddle Mildura

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

GPS...

Is an aid to navigation, that is all - just an aid, you still have to use your brain. Mind you there in lies the problem.

I am planning a trip up the Cairngorms mountains soon, i will be taking blankets, a paper map etc. why? because i am expecting the best. but planning for the worse.

The best tablets for Christmas

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Sometimes...

i wonder why i both reading el reg after shit like this - Basically this article could be summed up as, never used either a Surface or an iAnythig, i LLLLOOOOOOVVVVEEEEEE my Andriod tablet. Review my arse.

Windows Phone 8 must be Microsoft's priority one, two AND three

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Too little, no credibility, too expensive

There is the problem with M$ mobile devices, M$ should have learnt my the problems that Blackberry and Palm had. You cannot enter this market and expect to battle Apple.

How dumb do you have to be, not to learn by the lessons of other companies.

Mind you i am looking forward to getting a surface fondleslab for £50 when the bottom drops out of the market.

Microsoft’s so.cl network now open to all

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

Re: so.cl (pronounced “social “)

Shame the Cl cannot be removed and put in the gene pool, using Bing - what a numpty.

His Holiness Benedict XVI to tweet to his Catholic flock

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

hmmm, i can think of serveral...

hashtags that they should be monitoring....

We need a hang-em-high icon.

Quantum axes one in ten workers, insists it was not investor's idea

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Devil

We wish you a merry...

fcuk-off time, and a shity new year!!

Asshats.

What a time to do that, hope they are paying their tax as well.... Time for an investigate it think.

Chinese student fails job interview because of iPhone

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Go

Remember, an interview is a 2 way street...

If if looks like a shit hole, then tell them you dont want the job. Done that a few times.

Seems to me he had a lucky escape - its a tought place to work with pain and suffering, you can take that and shove it, i don't want any stress related problems making some other asshat rich.

Go - because you need to before you get stuck.

The Terminator, coming to a reality near you

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Boffin

Re: Chemical response

Given our customers - no, not all.

New science upsets calculations on sea level rise, climate change

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Thumb Up

Time to...

Fire up the V8!!!

Iran's Photoshop FAIL: 'New drone' actually Japanese university bird

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Mushroom

You decadent westerners will DIE

of fits of laughter at our l33t photoshop skillz.

Comet crashes to Earth: 125 stores wiped out

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Unhappy

We wish you a merry xmas...

In your cardboard box :( - i feel sorry for the people who have lost jobs over this.

Belgian finds missus was born a MAN after 19 YEARS of marriage

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Coat

I cannot believe its not butter...

It seemed to have worked for (s)him :D

ViewSonic Pro 9000 laser hybrid LED projector review

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Thumb Up

That looks...

A good device, certainly worth thinking about replacing old projectors with. I generally think projectors are the droppings of satans own stanic heard, but maybe this one is ok. Mind you projectors are generally from Dell, connected to dull as dishwasher Dell windoze machines, operated by equally dull sales driod.

Ten PlayStation 3 games you may have missed

Longrod_von_Hugendong
WTF?

Little big planet carting...

Could you rip off Nintendo anymore?

Time to exit the band-wagon and invent some original games, mind you since Nintendo basically had a Halfords voucher to redesign the Wii they probably cannot afford to sue, so you are pretty much safe.

WWII HERO PIGEON crypto message STUMPS GCHQ boffins

Longrod_von_Hugendong
FAIL

So...

A WW2 message is totally secure - yet lost memory sticks and laptops are not.... makes you think doesnt it.

Wont some one think of the morality of the the situation....

(Since thats the new buzz from MP's )

Another not very long period of time, another GiffGaff collapse

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Alert

Total Bollocks

Its working perfectly fine.

Netscape founder pays off MASSIVE tax bill with Facebook shares

Longrod_von_Hugendong
Thumb Up

Tax Bills

Pile of steaming crap - why dont they do what most politicians do and just use tax avoidance.

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