* Posts by Oengus

816 posts • joined 27 Jun 2012

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Arrrgh! Put down the crisps! 'Ultra-processed' foods linked to cancer!

Oengus
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Why not? we call it damper...

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If you don't like what IBM is pitching, blame Watson: It's generating sales 'solutions' now

Oengus
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It can't be worse than

it surely can't be worse the human-created bad security advice that crashed Australia's online census or the Queensland Health debacle

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Who wants dynamic dancing animations and code in their emails? Everyone! says Google

Oengus
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Is this really something to crow about?

Malte Ubl, engineering lead for AMP at Google, said over 31 million domains have created 5 million AMP pages since the technology debuted in early 2016.

31 million domains create 5 million pages that means that 5 out of 6 domains didn't produce an AMP page meaning only 16% take up at best (assuming 1 page per domain).

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NASA budget shock: Climate studies? GTFO. We're making the Moon great again, says Trump

Oengus
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Happy

Re: I really hate that man

https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/h_l_mencken

I would have thought that the number 1 of his top 10 quotes would apply. I almost fell off my chair laughing when I read it...

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No yolking matter: Google Translate cock-up gives Norwegians more than un œuf eggs

Oengus
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In this case that would be one heck of a basket...

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Tech giants' payouts go to everyone but affected citizens. US Supremes now urged to sort it out

Oengus
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Flame

Wrong penalty

The class-action lawsuit was filed on behalf of roughly 129 million US Google users who had their privacy violated ...

Due to the huge number of people affected, the settlement amounts to a paltry amount – roughly four cents – per person.

129 million people impacted and a penalty of $8.5 million. That penalty will only encourage Google to continue violating people's privacy. Another example of court imposed penalties just being taken in their stride without impacting the company's bottom line.

Until the legal system starts imposing penalties on these mega corporations that actually hurt they will keep on going the way they are and it will remain a legal system not be a justice system.

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Terror law expert to UK.gov: Why backdoors when there's so much other data to slurp?

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Precisely correct. If the government (or any organisation) is directing you in a particular direction have a good look around. You can bet there is something they are trying to get you to not look into...

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When you play this song backwards, you can hear Satan. Play it forwards, and it hijacks Siri, Alexa

Oengus
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I wonder

I wonder what playing Billy Joel's song "Downeaster Alexa" would do...

or what would happen in the Joel household if Billy was calling his daughter...

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Take a former NSA head hacker, a Raspberry Pi, weird Kiwi radios and what do you get?

Oengus
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Re: Low Power FM is legal in the US

In Oz we have similar restrictions. At one charity event I work with we had some people working in the AV control room who supply Clubs and licensed venues with transmitters for In-House TV on a public access channel. We setup one of the transmitters in the AV centre to transmit to the TVs (and large screens) we had around the venue. We attached the transmitter to a small domestic TV antenna. When the local community radio station wanted to rebroadcast the audio from our feed using their OB setup we gave them a HD Set-top box and indoor antenna to tune into the broadcast. The set-top box wouldn't find the channel using the Auto-scan function so we manually tuned it in. The signal was so strong it was overpowering the auto-tune function. The set-top box was 200m away from the transmitter and was able to clearly pickup the signal without the antenna attached.

We worked out that anyone in the immediate area (several Km square) who auto-tuned their TV or Set-top while we were broadcasting would have been able to view our feed.

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All aboard the Vomit Comet: Not the last train to Essex, but a modded 727 for weightless flight

Oengus
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Re: Rubber duck

With the security paranoia today, if you get to see the rubber duck you must be part of the flight crew...

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Causes of software development woes

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Re: In all my years in software, I have leared...

"3. Ask 100 users, get 101 different answers."

Your users are remarkable. If I ask 100 of my users I'll get several hundred different responses (especially if the users can talk to one another). Each user will have multiple ideas about what they want and when they hear other answers they will change their mind and modify the other users' requirement to make it a different requirement.

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ITU aims to to keep the radio on with new satellite regulation fees

Oengus
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Re: 1,000 Satellites?!?

and coverage. Individual low orbit satellites can only cover a small portion of the earth's surface. A swarm of '000s can cover the entire planet.

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If you won't use your brain our machine will use it for you, Nissan tells drivers

Oengus
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Re: Firefox

No this is from Nissan, you will have to think in Japanese.

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'Twas the night before Y2K and a grinch stole the IT department's overtime payout

Oengus
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My Christmas "rip-off" experience

Many years ago I worked for a major financial institution. Christmas day fell on a Saturday so we were looking forward to our reward for working (I was part of the IT operations staff). Our conditions stipulated double time plus a day in lieu for working the public holiday. It turns out that this particular year the Government of the day decided not to gazette the Saturday as a public holiday.

There was a hue and cry from the public when they realised that Christmas day was not a gazetted public holiday because, effectively, this meant that people could be expected to work Christmas day as a normal Saturday (retail staff in particular could have been impacted). We protested but the HR department bought out the agreement we worked under and stuck to their guns. We decided to do some independent research and found that Easter Saturday was gazetted as a public holiday for the finance sector (and always had been). We had never received the appropriate payment for Easter Saturday so greatly enjoyed enforcing the rules and made the HR department calculate the back entitlements for all impacted staff (more than 5 years worth of Easter Saturday entitlement for most of the 40 staff on the shift roster).

It ended up costing much more than it would have had they just given us what we expected for Christmas day.

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5 reasons why America's Ctrl-Z on net neutrality rules is a GOOD thing

Oengus
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Headmaster

Re: @Bob Dole ... WTF? Well put

spoon fed dribble drivel

FTFY

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How fast is a piece of string? Boffin shoots ADSL signal down twine

Oengus
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NBN Co

Please don't let anyone in charge of the Australian NBN (or their government masters) read this. They will seize on it as a way to save more money and speed up on the NBN rollout. The current service offerings are bad enough.

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So you're 'agile', huh? I do not think it means what you think it means

Oengus
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Pint

Still more importantly...

More importantly: please, let the T-bone rest for a while before cooking it.

Please, Let the T-bone rest after cooking it.

Beer because it is an essential accompaniment to any good steak...

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Japanese quadcopter makes overworked employees clock out

Oengus
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Rush

El Reg offices use a similar tactic, though it involves waving an open beer outside the front door at the end of the day.

If you tried that tactic here you would be killed in the rush (especially if it is Friday afternoon).

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Boffins foresee most software written by machines in 2040

Oengus
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Commonsense isn't common

Even the best written spec today includes a lot of unstated commonsense assumptions.

The problem with commonsense assumptions is that what is commonsense to one person is entirely different to another particularly cross culture. I am dealing with these "commonsense assumptions" on a project I am currently on and it is causing a lot of grief...

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Australia to probe Web giants' impact on news, ads, competition

Oengus
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Prediction

On current trends that means the probe's recommendations will land in the hands of an incoming Labor Party government of rather more progressive political hue than Australia's current elected rulers.

Simon predicting the next Australian election... You read it here first...

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Oengus
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Black Helicopters

Re: impact of advertising isn't new

These government probers aren't going to even touch the root problem here.

When did a government enquiry (especially an Australian government enquiry) ever get to the root of the problem? They are merely to placate the masses and make it look like the government is doing something (or cares about the general public).

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Night before Xmas and all through American Airlines, not a pilot was flying, thanks to this bug

Oengus
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FAIL

Managers too slack to do their job

It could so easily happen in my workplace. The managers used to be required to approve all leave requests. If they didn't do their job the request went through to payroll who automatically approved the leave (Policy decision). When this was reviewed the system was changed to automatically approve all leave that the employee had entitlement to because so many managers were not "doing their job". The managers are advised of the leave and have the ability to decline the leave but seldom bother review the leave calendars. If employees decide to apply for leave for the same period at different times the manager probably wouldn't notice that all of their staff are off at the same time.

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Elon Musk says he's not Satoshi Nakamoto and is pretty rubbish at Bitcoin

Oengus
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I am ...

Checks list of Aliases used...

Jim Di Griz

Dionysus

Tawny Madison

.

.

.

Nope, no Satoshi Nakamoto here either.

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2001: A Stob Odyssey

Oengus
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Happy

"nineteen one hundred and one"

Ha Ha... I expected this to be "nineteen tenty one"...

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Boss made dirt list of minions' mistakes, kept his own rampage off it

Oengus
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IBM PS/2

I had a manager who received one of the first PS/2 PCs in our office. We had an agreement with IBM that they would send out someone to install all equipment (including PCs as they were very new to us). The manager the PS/2 was destined for decided that he could install the new box himself. He assembled the system (forgetting to plug in the mouse), fired up the PS/2 and was rewarded with the Windows desktop. When he went to do something he realised he had forgotten the mouse. This was one of the "new" PS/2 bus mice (previously all we had were serial mice). He went to the back of the running PS/2 and plugged the mouse into the appropriate PS/2 port. The PC immediately shut down. All efforts to revive the box failed.

He rapidly re-boxed the PS/2 taking great care to put everything back where it should be and waited for the IBM tech to turn up to install the PS/2.

When the IBM tech removed everything and set it up it failed to startup. The IBM tech declared the PS/2 DOA and arranged a new one. He later told us that it was a defective motherboard.

By all accounts plugging a mouse or keyboard into a running PS/2 could cause a spike that would destroy the motherboard because of the way the PS/2 bus was connected to the system.

To this day I still give that manager a hard time whenever he gets something new and decides to set it up himself (he is a friend of mine long retired)...

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BOFH: But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?

Oengus
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Re: Wow!

The lions sleeping with a lamb.

Whats the old proverb? The lamb may lay down with the lions but you can bet they lamb won't get much sleep...

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IBM's next turnaround tool is ... a new open-source font?

Oengus
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Simple reason for this...

The branding department were next to face the axe in the IBM down-sizing so needed to do something to justify their retention. This ploy means the next department in line will face the axe instead.

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US government seizes Texas gun mass murder to demand backdoors

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that if a backdoor were mandated the Russians and Chinese would make it a priority to find and exploit it.

That would be illegal... They would change their laws to require that the companies supply them with the same access they had provided to the US government or have that phone banned in their countries. So much easier than trying to find the backdoor...

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Oengus
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No you gibbon, it's not personal; they purposely designed the operating system so that NO-ONE can access it.

Not quite. I was thinking something very similar...

No you gibbon, it's not personal; they purposely designed the operating system so that only authorised people can access it. FTFY

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Boffins: We can identify you by your typing, and we're gonna sell the tech to biz, govt – yay!

Oengus
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Re: Accelerometer data

It's a good thing that I never carry the damn thing with me. My boss is always telling me off for leaving the mobile on my desk and walking away or leaving it on the passengers seat of the car (if I bother to take it when I go out).

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Commuters' phone data could be tracked to save megabucks on census

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Why tracking Mobile phones is a bad idea for this....

However, the mobile phone data "greatly overestimated" the number of people who worked within a local authority.

Could this be because people carry more than one mobile phone (one personal and one work)?

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Lord of the Rings TV show shopped around Hollywood

Oengus
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Re: If there ever was a story perfect for television ...

and the terminally clueless will flock to it in droves, undoubtedly.

Its not referred to as the "Idiot Box" for no reason...

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Official US govt Twitter accounts caught tweeting in Russian, now mysteriously axed

Oengus
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Yes. They have heard of it. They use it as an excuse to reduce civil liberties and privacy all of the time.

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Paradise Papers were not an inside job, says leaky offshore law firm

Oengus
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Re: I get a bit fed up with it.

Basically we've two parallel global economies: one for those in the know with enough resources to use it and one for the rest of us plebs who pay for all the services.

I thought this has always been the case. One rule for the rich and another for the poor... Why do the politicians allow this - so they can exploit it for their benefit.

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SCO vs. IBM case over who owns Linux comes back to life. Again

Oengus
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Timing...

It's just gone Halloween and the Zombie awakens...

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Google remembers it has an air-fares API, takes the usual action

Oengus
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Re: I like this kind of behaviour ...

Google would buy the whole US government I think you have the wrong tense here. I thought Google had already bought the US government and already have them doing their biddings...

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Disney-branded internet filter had Mickey Mouse security

Oengus
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Re: stainless steel rat

Great series. I remember reading them many years ago and enjoying them. Harry Harrison had a lot of fun with that character. I even used a number of characters as pseudonyms on different websites..

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Hipsterverse horror as Slack takes Halloween hiatus

Oengus
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Re: Can't happen, didn't happen

You missed "The cloud is God"

All hail our mighty cloud overlords.

Another vote for the sarcasm icon.

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Australian senator Pauline Hanson wants devilish scam calls to flash '666'

Oengus
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Re: Competition

Hmmm... I am starting to see a common thread with nutcase politicians. This one has red hair as well...

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Thomas the Tank Engine lobotomised by fat (remote) controller

Oengus
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As long as you can keep kangaroos and people with earbuds off the tracks.....

Kangaroos are generally smart enough to avoid the trains. "People with earbuds"... if they are anywhere near these train tracks they are so lost they will die from their "stupidity" long before they can get back to civilization.

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IKEA flat-packs TaskRabbit to crack assembly code

Oengus
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The Interview...

Applying for the job

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Sysadmin tells user CSI-style password guessing never w– wait WTF?! It's 'PASSWORD1'!

Oengus
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Pint

Favourite

If I have to put a password on a file that really doesn't need the password but some numpty insists I password protect the file I like to use something like "What password" or "There is no password"...

When the user asks what the password is I look at them blankly and repeat the password. It takes some of them ages to realise that I am telling them the password. Some will argue for ages that there is a password and don't get the joke... I just keep repeating the password.

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Stack Overflow + Salary Calculator = your worth

Oengus
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What about...

Mainframe (IBM S/390) Assembler???

RPG/II/III/IV??

Fortan - haven't used it in more years than I care to remember... (first language I learnt)

More other obscure languages than I care to count...

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Grab your popcorn: The first annual Privacy Shield review is go

Oengus
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Reality

the review needs to look at how Privacy Shield is working in reality.

Is that reality anything like the "reality" presented in reality television?

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Would you get in a one-man quadcopter air taxi?

Oengus
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Re: Would you get in a one-man quadcopter air taxi?

fishman, My wife and I could go together - if we were naked.

And with a ceiling of 10000 ft you could join the "mile high" club...

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Google sued for paying women less than men

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And the company is pretty good about storing data.

They may be good at storing data but try to get the data out of them (unless it is in their interests)...

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Google's $8.5m class-action privacy payout goes to: Lawyers' alma maters, web giant's pals

Oengus
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How many times

(Although we at The Reg would like to note that we would be happy to produce 200 pages of proposals in return for $1.1m in cold, hard cash.)

How many times does "Give me the money." have to be repeated to fill 200 pages? I am sure I could copy paste it for $1.1million...

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Germans force Microsoft to scrap future pushy Windows 10 upgrades

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Cost of doing business

Microsoft will be less pushy in Germany

Microsoft will break the deal as soon soon as the fines are less than the cost of compliance (or less than they can make from breaking the law) and they will fight tooth and nail in the courts then come up with a "voluntary" payment with no admission of guilt. Regardless the customers will be screwed over and get no recompense.

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IBM likely to close Australian data centre

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5 minutes drive from Castle Hill station or 5 minutes walk from Cherrybrook station...

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Uh oh, scientists know how those diamonds got in Uranus, and they're telling everyone!

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Re: The answer to the question.

I thought you ate well done steak (carbonized) and squeezed them out.

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