* Posts by Omgwtfbbqtime

494 posts • joined 30 Mar 2012

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Bye bye MP3: You sucked the life out of music. But vinyl is just as warped

Omgwtfbbqtime
Flame

"It was like camping overnight with a vegan."

It stinks - but you get all the bacon in the morning?

Flame for cooking the bacon of course!

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Dyson celebrates 'shock' EU Court win over flawed energy tests

Omgwtfbbqtime
Pint

Re: Petty?

I find those airblade urinals spray your pee everywhere....

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What augmented reality was created for: An ugly drink with a balloon

Omgwtfbbqtime
Alert

Noise in the night?

Meh - if the dog doesn't move neither will I.

Luckily Sighthound Xs (aka Lurchers) are well known for their laziness - 30 second sprint followed by 23 hours of sleep.

The dog going berserk is a hint its time for coffee.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
Thumb Up

"With a short, sharpened iron bar "

You mean a screwdriver?

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Customer satisfaction is our highest priority… OK, maybe second-highest… or third...

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: "I always ask for coffee-flavoured coffee."

Not maple nut crunch?

+1 for the Denis Leary reference.

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Startup remotely 'bricks' grumpy bloke's IoT car garage door – then hits reverse gear

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

"But my fridge, door-lock or boiler have no need to post to The Register."

Oh I don't know, I would be quite interested in reading what your fridge has to say.

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User jams up PC. Literally. No, we don't know which flavour

Omgwtfbbqtime

"Cases lined with razor baldes to stop the un-initiated tinkering."

That was a design feature. You needed a blood sacrifice to make the damn thing work.

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Anti-TV Licensing petition gets May date for Parliament debate

Omgwtfbbqtime
Facepalm

These stretches are usually there because they are historically accident black spots...

Do the words "regression to the mean" mean anything to you?

One accident does not a black spot make.

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A webcam is not so much a leering eye as the barrel of a gun

Omgwtfbbqtime
Boffin

Meh

Just disable it in the bios. Then Skype wont even report that you are capable of transmitting video (at least it used to).

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WINNER! Crush your loved ones at Connect Four this Christmas

Omgwtfbbqtime
Childcatcher

Post Christmas dinner is already planned

Exploding Kittens (SFW version) with alcoholic coffee followed by King of New York and a bottle of Port.

Sorted.

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Capita STILL hasn't delivered usable Army recruitment IT system

Omgwtfbbqtime

One thing Crapita and the other outsourcers are good at...

... is negotiating contracts.

Unfortunately MoD (civilian and military) and in fact pretty much all of the civil service in general have no clue on how to do this.

Then you have the issue of moving the goal posts after the contract is agreed - with all of the incremental change costs to add.

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Brexit may not mean Brexit at all: UK.gov loses Article 50 lawsuit

Omgwtfbbqtime
Headmaster

Law is always a matter of interpretation and this is wide open

"We hold that the Secretary of State does not have power under the Crown's prerogative to give notice pursuant to Article 50 of the TEU for the United Kingdom to withdraw from the European Union."

No mention on whether the Prime Minister does or does not have the power.

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Virgin Media boss warns Brexit could hamstring broadband investment

Omgwtfbbqtime

"Hamstring investment"

What investment?

I moved last year to an area just outside of that already cabled. For the record it's not newbuild - mid 1930's in fact.

Registered interest in their Cable my Street site and got a we'll be in touch response.

No response received - so Sky got our money for this year and looks like next year too.

Nearest cable is about a mile away down the same road and there is lots of expensive newbuild that would be perfect targets for selling BB and TV to.

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BOFH: There are no wrong answers, just wrong questions. Mmm, really wrong ones

Omgwtfbbqtime
Alert

@chris king

Or that you had been sniffing them?

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Great British Block-Off: GCHQ floats plan to share its DNS filters

Omgwtfbbqtime
Big Brother

First step in privatising GCHQ?

Not surprised they are pushing out a product that can be monetised.

Let's think this through.

Charge £x to each ISP for access to the filter database or £y a lower amount for routing the traffic through the GCHQ's already in place firewall, of course we won't look at the data without just cause.

The only surprise is that this is not being rolled out as mandatory for .gov, .nhs, .police etc or that its not being offered as "protect your home network for £10 a year, just set your dns to point to us and we'll "take care of you"!" to the general populace/sheeple.

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UK nixes Land Registry sale

Omgwtfbbqtime
Facepalm

Re: The biggest issue with this idea...

I'd rather it was Google than Capita/G4S/ATOS/GS/JPM et al

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HDMI hooks up with USB-C in cables that reverse, one way

Omgwtfbbqtime

you'll still need a cable tie to (in the darkness) bind them!

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Blink and you missed it: Asteroid came within 90,000 km, only one sky-watcher saw it

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

@Version 1.0

Ahh.. but are they known unknowns?

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A USB stick as a file server? We've done it!

Omgwtfbbqtime

Make a server farm^H^H^H^H smallholding...

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/11/08/brando_16_port_usb_hub/

blast from the past. ;)

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Excel hell messes up ~20 per cent of genetic science papers

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Oh, Is that so?

Change your region in control panel to murkin and your problem with dates disappears.

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Omgwtfbbqtime
Windows

Re: Everything is potentially a US formatted date

I found the best way to deal with this was set your region to USian and leave it there. I don't get the mismatched date formats on the initial import (.CSV from a USian server) and once saved to .xlsx it keeps the dates the way they are meant to be for the other users.

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Windows 10 Anniversary Update completely borks USB webcams. Yay.

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Yay!

I'd have to remove the black tape over mine to see if it is affected.

Nah...

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Cambridge University controlled tech startup fund raises £75m

Omgwtfbbqtime

So pretty much the same as Imperial Innovations plc?

I'm glad Woodford has a chunk of it, my pension has a chunk of Woodford.

I can't invest directly in CIC or II for reasons.

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Revealed: How a weather forecast in 1967 stopped nuclear war

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Why so coy?

Staxton Wold/ Fylingdales?

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Milk IN the teapot: Innovation or abomination?

Omgwtfbbqtime
Mushroom

Sounds Like Tea - NATO.

Take a green norgie container, add a large handfull of NAAFI teabags, a bucket of sugar and half fill with boiling water. top off with milk (So about 50:50).

Leave to stew for 7 or 8 hours (while still maintaining the near boiling temp).

Serve on a cold, wet gun position.

Absolutely vile but its hot and wet.

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The return of (drone) robot wars: Beware of low-flying freezers

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Even in 2016

Don't forget the motorcyclists!

Hint - if the person in front of you can see the underside of your motorcycle in their mirrors as you accelerate towards them - You're a cunt.

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Bot-herders fire fake GPS co-ords at Niantic to collect Pokémon

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Damn

Not below 70mph - passenger seat on M1. Not a lot of time to click the toon before its gone though.

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Empty your free 30GB OneDrive space today – before Microsoft deletes your files for you

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: A few bad apples

First, if it's free then you're not the customer.

There - FTFY

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'2nd referendum' topples site

Omgwtfbbqtime
FAIL

Traditional EU response

Keep voting until we get the right result!

Lisbon Treaty/Ireland anyone?

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PM resigns as Britain votes to leave EU

Omgwtfbbqtime

@NotBob

True - I give it three weeks before stability returns. Once the gamblers have screwed every last penny of profit they can from the instability.

Then it will be business as usual when everyone has worked out the sky hasn't fallen.

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Welcome to the jumbo: Axl Rose tries to take a bite out of 'Fat Axl' internet meme

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

AXL Rose?

Oh you mean AXXXL Rose!

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In-flight movies via BYOD? Just what I always wan... argh no we’re all going to die!

Omgwtfbbqtime

Ooh missus, get a grip on my notifications

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

Fired?

Or did you mean shot?

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Stop resetting your passwords, says UK govt's spy network

Omgwtfbbqtime
Happy

Re: "Deep and fried for the start of the next year?"

Nah, I had moved into a Suzanne Vega phase by that point -

Blood

Makes

Noise

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Omgwtfbbqtime
Happy

@zanshin

My employer has a similar 90 day policy.

I find it easiest to keep the first half of the password constant and the second half the name something current to me.

I ran through work/rest/play as the 2nd half over most of 1 year, closed out the year with mars....

I've found I can revert to the start of the password list every time I get a new laptop though so it must be local hashstore rather than at network level.

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GCHQ is having problems meeting Osborne's 2020 recruitment target

Omgwtfbbqtime
Flame

Re: Ethics

Nah - tried something like that a few years ago -

Iron oxide, aluminium powder and magnesium ribbon all ordered in the space of 5 mins through ebay.

No knock on the door - other than the postie - the iron oxide jiffy wouldnt fit therough the letterbox.

Luckily the post time meant I sobered up before removing the tree stump next to the fence with the thermite....

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Photographer hassled by Port of Tyne for filming a sign on a wall

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: " 100% matches what is visible in streetview."

It also 100% matches what you see driving past - I go past there after dropping the dog off at daycare.

It's really not that interesting a view during rush hour.

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When customers try to be programmers: 'I want this CHANGED TO A ZERO ASAP'

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

Re: Three glasses of whisky

Email your reasoning to yourself. Then you can pick it up in the morning.

Or have 3 glasses of whisky and email it to your boss and HR for added amusement.

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Land Rover Defender dies: Production finally halted by EU rules

Omgwtfbbqtime

"if its crash-survivable its not a Landie"

The Landie will survive a crash quite nicely - in a way similar to an Israeli tank.

Just hose it out and the next driver is good to go.

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Afraid of getting your iThing pwned? Get yourself iOS 9.2.1

Omgwtfbbqtime

Mobileiron?

Anyone know if this fixes the issue with managed apps in Mobileiron that was introduced in 9.2?

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Boozing is unsafe at ‘any level’, thunders chief UK.gov quack

Omgwtfbbqtime
Thumb Up

@a cynic writes

The Percy Arms in Newcastle used to sell that under the name "Duckhams Hypergrade"

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Review: Star Wars: The Force Awakens offers a new hope for the franchise

Omgwtfbbqtime

Shove 1kg into E=mc^2 and marvel at how much energy you would need

Ummm no.

That would be the amount of energy released in a total conversion of mass to energy.

The bolts travel fairly slowly (compared with light speed) but still probably comparable with firearms say 1km/sec.

Kinetic energy is 1/2 mv^2 so 1Kg at 1,000 ms^-1 is half a million Joules.

or about 120000 calories in old money - probably Jabba's daily intake.

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Smut-seeding Prenda Law ringleader must sell home to pay $2.5m debt

Omgwtfbbqtime
Go

Hmmm...

I believe kidneys are an asset, with a real sale value. I recommend the court forces sale of these.

As are lungs, liver, heart....

Sorry, forgot it was a lawyer, so no heart.

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Who owns space? Looking at the US asteroid-mining act

Omgwtfbbqtime
Trollface

Re: Unleash The Greenfly!

As I have said before:

Earth First!

We can strip mine the other planets later!

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Court: Swedish ISPs can't be forced to block Sweden's Pirate Bay

Omgwtfbbqtime
Facepalm

Re: 6 Links in the article

If you are unable to find a link to TPB on your own that bypasses any game of wackamole, then maybe El Reg is not the news organ for you. May I suggest the Daily Fail?

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Where's Worstall/Weekend Edition?

Omgwtfbbqtime
Pint

Re: @ Gordon 10

He also writes for Forbes on occasion...

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TalkTalk hired BAE Systems' infosec bods before THAT hack

Omgwtfbbqtime

Re: Called it.

thanks

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Omgwtfbbqtime
Holmes

Called it.

Here

and here

No hard links to comments anymore? Or am I just blind?

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Virgin Media hikes broadband, phone prices by five per cent

Omgwtfbbqtime

"Isn't this Bait and Switch?"

It would be if they hadn't offered to let customers leave early because of the price rise.

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TalkTalk boss: 'Customers think we're doing right thing after attack'

Omgwtfbbqtime
FAIL

Have TalkTalk explained

Why they had rolled out encryption in 2015 per annual report - signed by Dodo no less, yet she seems unaware of this and the why it did nothing?

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