* Posts by Euripides Pants

977 posts • joined 11 Feb 2012

Could a 'Zunewatch' be Microsoft's next hardware foray?

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Re: "The Zunewatch, as it will most certainly not be named"

"How about a WoW! Watch (Windows on Wrist)"

WfW 3.11 (Windows for Watches)



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RTFA - she's Queen of the Nile

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Well, of course. Pliers are Sociable...

Microsoft's 'CEO of no' on Xbox: NO SALE

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Re: "Bing is actually a successful product for Microsoft"

Let us not forget Bob.....

The Internet of Things helps insurance firms reward, punish

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Re: kicking the shit out of the future

Raising my daughter to do the same.

GCHQ grants security clearance to Samsung's Knox mobe security

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Re: "Android solutions"

Presumably the solution to Android is iOS - in the same way that Diarrhea is "Imodium Solutions"

There, FTFY.

Time-rich Brit boffin demos DIY crazytech wolverine talons

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Re: Or a hug from his mum.

Mum won't hug him while he's wearing that contraption!

US space-station crisis: 'We have enough of our own problems' sighs Russian deputy PM

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Re: War Stars

"It's also clear that this ISS will never evolve into the Death Star"

One less thing to worry about.

Giant pop can FOUND ON MOON

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Re: Its in the name

It is usually used in conjunction with a Jigari to trick people into thinking the material being transported is not in any way fecal.

Hence the term Jigari-Pocari...

Mine's the one with an unrefrigerated pocari in the pocket.

Microsoft bug hunters kicked 0day own goal

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Re: Ydgterday

I thought Ydgterday was Welsh for "OW, my balls!"

FCC headman Wheeler calls for an 'open internet' – but what the %$#@! does he mean?

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Re: firearms?

Probably nice, hot burning tar and a splintery rail (pointy edge up, of course).

Comcast exec says wired broadband customers should pay-as-they-go

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Re: disk-fracking and exploitation of Alaska's hidden porn reserves

Wish I could upvote that more than once.

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Re: It is not nonsense...

"According to Cohen, the move is all about porking big time"

Yep, you know if they're allowed to do this that they'll come up with rate plans that makes everyone pay more.

Philips lobs patent sueball at Nintendo in US: Seeks to BAN Wii U

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Re: Is it even profitable to sell in the USA any more?

Nope. Its crazy profitable as most of us do not realize that we are living Aldous Huxley's 'Brave New World'...

Look out, FCC: R.E.M., Aerosmith, Jello Biafra, 57 others join net neutrality crusade

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Re: Michelle Bachmann

She's more like a monkey flingin' crap than a cow.

550 reasons to buy this book for your beloved: COCKROACHES of Oz

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Re: Cockroaches aren't poisonous, right?

"So how come there are so many of them in Australia?"

They enjoy sex, maybe...

Russia to suspend US GPS stations in tit-for-tat spat

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Relax, Trevor

" I'm fucking terrified of you bastards"

Our "health care" system will implode soon enough and drag the rest of our economy down with it. You will then be able to take Adventure Vacations in the worlds newest third world country and marvel at entire families living in bloated SUVs rusting on our decrepit interstates.

On second thought, since most of us in the US can calmly accept this fate maybe you should be terrified...

Microsoft throws Kinect under a bus, slashes Xbox One to $399

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Re: XBox 180

But MS Marketing refers to it as the XBox 540!

LA air traffic meltdown: System simply 'RAN OUT OF MEMORY'

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@ Marketing Hack

You, sir, have made a shit - tea comment!

We're from the same dust cloud, bro: Boffins find Sun's long-lost sibling

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Re: Bad news...

It neither evolved or was designed, it was a bad accident.

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Re: coffinboffins

If that one doesn't become the OED word of the year there is something wrong with our species.

SMASH AND GRAB iThieves run car through front of Berkeley's Apple Store

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Re: Hasn't El Reg heard of ramraiding before?

"Why would you rob an abortion clinic? Or government building for that matter."

We blow them up.

UN to debate killer drone ethics

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How the development of LAWS could impact on humans?

If the U.N. "experts" haven't realized that laws were developed thousands of years ago and cannot comprehend the impact they've had on the human race over the millenia, well, this is another waste of time, effort and protoplasm...

Amazon granted patent for taking photos against a white background – seriously

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Re: Prior art??

"Must have skipped USPTO's mind, empty as it is!"

They drew a blanc....

Mine's the one with "Fotogerfy fer dummeez" in the pocket.

Boffinry breakthrough: First self-replicating life with 'alien' DNA

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Re: I for one welcome

our new Shoggoth overlords...

WTF is Net Neutrality, anyway? And how can we make everything better?

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@ Irony Deficient

"we have a choice between the telephone company and a cable company"

Not much of a choice. The reality in the US is that we all get our internet access from the phone company as even the cable companies offer phone service.

Hey, operators... 'member our edge-of-SPAAACE interwebs balloons? Help! - Google

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Re: Idiots

"This project is doomed"

Even if they make the balloons look like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man?!

Silly sysadmins ADDING Heartbleed to servers

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Re: it doesn't look like US wants to bring Freedom®™ to them just yet

The fjords confuse us...

Winklevoss twins eye up NASDAQ: Publicly traded Bitcoin fund... what could go wrong?

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Re: Winkelvoss

I think I shall have to start reading these comments on a tablet as they are easier to clean than keyboards....

Vinyl-fetish hipsters might just have a point

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Re: significant wave of deafness

There is a looming deafness epidemic. You just won't hear about it...

Britain'll look like rural Albania without fracking – House of Lords report

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Re: Question

Thanks. Now that that's cleared up I can go back to pondering why bowels never leave forwarding addresses whenever they move.

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How does rural Albania differ from downtown Albania?

Japanese cops arrest man with five 3D printed guns at home

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Re: Correlation is not in direct relation to gun ownership.

"The USA has probably more drugs, gambling and vice than any other of country and also the highest homicide rate, possibly a correlation here."

Thanks for noticing, we've worked hard to get this messed up.

Traffic light vulns leave doors wide open to Italian Job-style hacks

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Won't matter in countries...

...where the horn is used as a substitute for the brake pedal.

Potato in SPAAAAACE: LOHAN chap cooks up stratospud with Heston Blumenthal

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Re: Well....

"creamy mash"

Should make it easier to convert them to Vodka:)

Solaris deposed as US drone-ware, replaced by Linux administration

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Re: Death from above

But penguins can't fly!

THREE BILLIONTH person to come online in early 2015

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Re: Prize

Boner pills! Gotta be boner pills!

Symantec: Antivirus is 'DEAD' – no longer 'a moneymaker'

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Antivirus is 'DEAD'

'bout time they caught up with the rest of us.

PEAK APPLE: Mystery upstart to hurl iLord from its throne 'by 2020'

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Re: "one phone to rule them all"

Nah, it'll be one ring(tone) to rule them all...

Mine's the one with the Silmarillion in the pocket.

Cold War spy aircraft CRASHED Los Angeles' air traffic control

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Re: 'forgot that airspace is 3D'

"unless Madeline Kahn was also pissing off James T. Kirk..."

He never got over her stealing the role of Lili Von Shtupp in Blazing Saddles from him.

The amazing .uk domain: Less .co and loads more whalesong

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Re: The colour represents self expression, new thinking, and new horizons.


<puts tinfoil hat back on>

ok, time to up the meds again.

Obama: I'm the CTRL-ALT-DEL President

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Re: Blue Screen of Death, or...

Dubya did break the economy of the entire planet...

6TB - big? Pah! Seagate plans to put out 8TB and 10TB MONSTERS

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Re: Darkness

You really do not want to access the technical documents about such an underworld - messing about with the (blue) Prints of Darkness is dangerous business.

Mine's the one with the Necronomicon in the pocket...

Customisation is BAD for the economy, say Oz productivity wonks

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No, I think what they meant was that the Productivity Commission is thoroughly unproductive.

Cuffing darknet-dwelling cyberscum is tricky. We'll 'disrupt' crims instead, warns top cop

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Re: A better solution: better defences

"Such as stopping crimes from occurring..."

Without a trio of psychic retards to form the nucleus of a precrime unit, how ya gonna do that?

All men are part of a PURE GENETIC ELITE, says geno-science bloke

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Re: But ...

"Are you sure the frillies are hers ?"

Well, they're certainly not mine!

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Re: Interestingly*

"We're extremely fortunate that birds don't have a pair of limbs with opposable thumbs, or we'd be the threatened species by now."

Ooooh, new project for the weekend! Gonna build build me a Dalek outta a parrot and a Roomba!

Dell charges £5 to switch on power-saving for new PCs (it takes 5 clicks)

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Re: Shoddy components

"Dell make users pay to have the buttons clicked as part of set-up."

Actually, Dell doesn't "make users pay", they can choose to accept the standard configuration for free. What Dell is doing is offering a configuration service that is outside their standard manufacturing process. This introduces administrative and logistical overhead which costs more than the actual minute for some goob on the production floor to click a few things in the Control Panel.

Are they taking advantage of stupid people? Yes.

Should they be vilified? Maybe.

Do I work for Dell? No.

Let the downvotes begin...

Brazilian president signs internet civil rights law

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Re: "if the USA keeps braking the law ?"

Then things would move at a snail's pace through our legal system.

Oh, wait, they already do...

Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it

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Obligatory XKCD


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