* Posts by goodjudge

56 posts • joined 16 Nov 2011


A quick cup of coffee leaves production manager in fits and a cleaner in tears


Important: do not unplug the UPS

Nigh-on 20 years ago I worked for a small hosting company. Our servers were hosted abroad and one day we lost contact and immediately started getting customer calls. For some unfathomable reason a new member of staff in the data centre had unplugged the uninterruptable power supply. We never did find out what happened to him...

More nodding dogs green-light terrible UK.gov pr0n age verification plans


Surely at least some of these offshore content providers will avoid potential litigation simply by blocking all UK IPs, in the same way as we still can't read the online versions of various US newspapers and magazines because the publishers can't be arsed to change their systems to comply with the Nth detail of GDPR.

Awkward... Revealed Facebook emails show plans for data slurping, selling access to addicts' info, crafty PR spinning


Re: I'm shocked I tell you ...

Indeed. Rapacious capitalists in "lying through their teeth and generally not being very nice" shocker! Next up, our special report on bear activities in forested areas...

Uncle Sam gives itself the right to shoot down any drone, anywhere, any time, any how


Re: "Credible Threat"

"The last thing any sane shooter would want is to hurt somebody."

Problem is, as we know from regular news stories, that there are plenty of legal gun owners in the US who are anything but sane, either in the pejorative or medical senses. And a few more in other parts of the world.

Whois? Whowas. So what's next for ICANN and its vast database of domain-name owners?


Re: Great article


WikiLeave? Assange tipped for Ecuadorian eviction


Re: He may regret waiting

"years ago" = pre-Trump. Common sense is not just out of the window, it's running down the street as fast as it can and those in charge are denying it was ever there in the first place.

Also, there is no statute of limitations on "causing embarrassment to a powerful government". Caused by non-government actors, of course, not what they do to themselves. (Trump, Bojo etc.)

Beer hall putz: Regulator slaps northern pub over Nazi-themed ad


stable door / horse

"The Buck Inn was ordered to not show the adverts again "

So the ASA is ruling in January 2018 on a Facebook ad placed in September 2017 for an event that presumably took place in either September or October 2017... I'm sure the pub will find it easy to abide by that one.

Who's that at Ring's door? Why, it's Skybell with a begging cup, er, patent rip-off lawsuit


Re: They have a case?

"why buy one of these when a quality, keyed deadbolt is cheap and fairly easy to install?"

Get with the programme grandad! It's 2018, no one cares about boring old bits of metal that can't be controlled from your phone. Don't ask why, just revere the new shiny thing.

Nest's slick IoT burglar alarm catches crooks... while it eyes your wallet


Re: Next development - for crooks

Re: "It looks like you’re close to home – turn off alarm?", where is the security when you can steal a phone and get the house included?

Brit MP Dorries: I gave my staff the, um, green light to use my login


Re: Nadine Dorries : Why do people vote for her?

A few years ago there was a lot of research done on her by a certain blogger, which it seems you may have have read - I recall a fair bit about her 'main residence' for the purpose of parliamentary expenses. But I won't mention his name as for some totally unconnected reason he became the target of a long-running smear campaign.

Anyway, why do people vote for her? Because she represents part of Bedfordshire and they'll vote for anything with a blue rosette stuck to it.


Didn't care, won't care

Remember that this is the same politician who "cares" so much about her constituents that she disappeared from Parliament a few years back to go on I'm A Celebrity... She's pretty much un-embarressable and she represents an unswervingly true-blue part of the country. She knows there'll be no consequences for her.

Sci-Hub domains inactive following court order


Scientific publishing

On the general issue of the world of scientific publishing, if you have a little while (it is Friday afternoon) then I'd recommend this long article from the Guardian from last June:


Budget 2017: How to make a downbeat forecast sound better. Say 'tech' a lot?


Re: Number of teachers is not the issue

"Make sure you have a long term strategy in place and keep to it."

Two problems with that:

1) Any new policy takes at least a year to set up, then the kids are in secondary school for 5-7 years, then it will take at least a couple of years to see the results in the workplace. By then there'll have been one or two elections and "the other lot" might be in power, in which case they'll take any credit. And that would never do.

2) name me one minister, of any party, who's ever said "actually, my predecessor did quite a good job so I'll leave things as they are".

The actual kids and schools involved are well down the priority list.

Police camera inaction? Civil liberties group questions forces' £23m body-cam spend


Re: Two sides to every argument

"...the rash of speed cameras carefully hidden among shrubs, behind walls, behind signs and so on placed to catch as many people as possible as a money raising activity..."

Guess what. If you don't speed, it doesn't matter where the camera is, it won't go off. Also, AFAIK it's still a requirement to have the little white lines painted down the middle of the road to show the 50m or so being measured. I presume you look at the road in front of you?

Do you use .home and .mail on your network? ICANN mulls .corp, .mail, .home dot-word domains


Re: "Ad nauseum (sic)"

Mr Shepherd, I presume you're not a Private Eye reader. They frequently use "passim, ad nauseum" as a humorous way of pointing out that they've written about a particular scandal / dodgy practice / act of crime in multiple previous issues. I.e. "we're sick of writing about this". Generally it's because no action has been taken (or is likely to be) to change the process / close the loophole / investigate the crime. ICANN's incompetent handling of the "new domain extension" process has been covered many times before in El Reg...

Want to come to the US? Be prepared to hand over your passwords if you're on Trump's hit list


"It's worse, because as soon as they have your password they can fabricate any "evidence" against you - and then refuse you the visa"

I cannot upvote this enough. And of course if they refuse you the visa and you've applied as a refugee due to being not-entirely-praising of your *current* leader, what's to stop them passing the info back to your former countrymen's border security, who'll be waiting to give you a warm welcome from the return flight.

IETF 'reviewing' US event plans in the face of Trump's travel ban


Re: @ Ginger ... "City University New York has more than 100 affected. That's just one university."

"The truth is that one country on the banned list (90 day ban) is known for state sponsored terrorism. (Iran)"

Israel is known for state-sponsored terrorism - invading all its neighbours, occupying bits of at least 2 of them for decades, carrying out various, documented, security service kidnappings and assassinations in foreign countries. Saudi money has built hundreds if not thousands of wahahbist-based schools and colleges in many developing (and developed) countries. Both of those are a far bigger threat to regional and global stability than Iran could ever be.

Trump lieutenants 'use private email' for govt work... but who'd make a big deal out of that?


Re: The return of the high horse

"You know what Tories and Republicans don't do?

Smash shit up when they don't get their own way! "

Have you looked at any pictures of Iraq recently? Like, in the last 14 years?

US Supreme Court to hear case that may ruin Lone Star patent trolls


Bonus points for the Michelle Shocked sub-head reference...

That is all

Need to tailor Swift for servers? Software upstart claims to have 'perfect' assistant


Congratulations on...

...another classic El Reg sub-heading. Keep up the good work.

No super-kinky web smut please, we're British


Re: First they came....

Shirley you can't be serious? I'm sure you meant click the Troll icon... The UK hasn't had a Socialist anywhere near the corridors of power since 1979. Mr Broon came close but was pretty much a lame duck from the start. It's the nanny (Patrician) state you should be concerned about, which is mostly posh kids that think the 'lower orders' aren't entitled to anything except bread and the occasional circus, lest the moral fabric of the nation be corrupted.

Add it to the tab: ICO fines another spammer as unpaid bills mount


Re: The law is there for a reason, it’s to stop companies inundating people with unwanted messages

>Something else needs to be done

I'm thinking a baseball bat. With nails in it.

So. What's North Korea really like?


No contradiction between "The next thing you notice is that nobody ever wears jeans." and "For men, it is compulsory to wear closed shoes, trousers (not jeans)". If you'd read it properly, the first statement was about the country in general, the second was specifically about visiting the Kims' memorial. I.e. tourists have to dress up, not wear jeans.

As for "Conjecture based on handlers not allowing conversation or contact", surely you can grasp that the handlers and tourists talked to each other and/or that such things can be inferred from others' actions?

The server's down. At 3AM. On Christmas. You're drunk. So you put a disk in the freezer


Re: >Silly us: we blew a Christmas On-Call story months before the day.

My wife works for a Very Famous Store in central London. Their Xmas department opens in August to catch the tourist market...

TRUMP: ICANN'T EVEN! America won't hand over internet control to Russia on my watch


"The US is completely unrecognizable from when I was young, and not in a good way"

I believe the Navajo, Sioux, Cree etc. where saying the same thing 150 years ago...

Conviction by computer: Ministry of Justice wants defendants to plead guilty online


"Victim surcharge" (it has a proper government name that I don't recall) has to be applied by the court to all convictions. However, I do believe it's getting abolished soon.

You also missed the most important third lesson:

NEVER speed.

Pope meets Zuckerberg


Remind me...

which one of them is infallible?

UK.gov flings £30m at driverless car R'n'D, wants plebs to speek their branes


Re: We're not robots! Highways Agency & Avon and Somerset Police beg to differ.

... must ... resist ... the .... troll ... sorry, I just can't.

"No limit showing, no cameras seen, many would argue that it felt safer sticking to 80mph on an empty motorway,"

I wouldn't. The motorway speed limit is 70mph unless a variable limit is posted. I learned that a long time before I passed my driving test, and that was 25+ years ago. I don't recall if they had the overhead limit signs back then but they certainly had the metal ones around roadworks. It really is very simple. Most of the rest of the post is just the usual "why is the fascist state stopping me from driving fast?" whine.

Also I just googled "M4 71mph speeding fines", expecting a torrent of articles about the torrent of fines. Unsurprisingly there were none. I did find a 2015 discussion board entry where someone asked "not sure if this is a myth but...", and all the responses said "it almost certainly is".

I also found http://www.ukmotorists.com/speeding%20fines2.asp where people appear to be able to post their own conviction details. The lowest I found in a 70mph zone was 78mph - on an dual carriageway, not a motorway - but the majority were well over 85.

And before you ask, no I don't speed. I have done, but when I bought my current car 7 years ago, it had an MPG display and I quickly adjusted my driving to "get the high score". I rarely do more than 60 on motorways now, even on long journeys. Getting 450-500 miles per tank from a 1.4l hatchback is much more satisfying.

Cue the downvotes from the petrolheads...

This local council paid HOW MUCH for an SD card?!


Re: This local council paid HOW MUCH for an SD card?!

Colleagues asked the same question in our organisation. The corporate response was that if people could buy from wherever they liked, there is no oversight as to whether it really is the cheapest, is actually necessary, is correct for the job etc. They also told us it would mean Finance managing multiple small supplier accounts rather than a few large accounts, with increased admin costs, duplication etc. So the extra spend on Product X is allegedly more than balanced by reduced (hidden) organisational costs elsewhere. Up to you whether you believe that.

Visiting America? US border agents want your Twitter, Facebook URLs


Twatter and US border staff

Two organisations to which the words "rational thought" and "common sense" are utterly unknown. In combination, what could possibly go wrong?

F-35s failed 'scramble test' because of buggy software


Where's Lester...

... to tell us that Buy American is always best?

Utah declares 'war on smut'


Re: I thought they tried that before

I've visited Utah. There's sweet FA to do there apart from look at scenery - which, whilst it is stunningly beautiful, doesn't help the long winter evenings fly by. And alcohol is banned in at least half the state too (or was when I was there). So, hardly surprising they turn en masse to, erm, online scenery.

Dodgy software will bork America's F-35 fighters until at least 2019


Re: Bring Back Lewis

Agreed. I used to find some of his articles a little, shall we say, tedious, but I recently found his book on defence mis-procurement (from 10 years ago) in a local charity shop and it was a very enjoyable read (*) - the style that is, not the subject matter. Back then he was cautiously optimistic about the carriers but they, and the planes to go on them, have fallen into the same cycle of greed and incompetence.

* No, I am not Lewis.

Telling your wife why you were fired is the only punishment


Curiosity controlled

Doesn't matter if it's home or work, the stars may just hit an unlucky alignment. A few years back a friend's flatmate was heading home (abroad) and offered to sell my friend his laptop. Friend asked me to have a look over it. It was running quite slowly so I checked the % hard drive use - nearly full. So I did a search on all files over (I think) 50Mb. Up came a long list of movies, many with filenames that were definitely borderline. I immediately shut it down and my friend politely declined the offer...

Smartphone hard, dudes, like it’s the end of the world!


"Sure, I’ll take a look at your crappy little cheapo smartphone, I said. By the time I had phoned around my contacts, only to discover that magazines and websites are no longer interested in reviews of affordable, entry-level kit"

I am. It sounds very much like the one I bought in September - my selection process was "the cheapest possible thing that actually qualifies as a smartphone and doesn't look like it's going to break within 2 minutes". It replaced the even cheaper, but better, QWERTY Nokia that I unfortunately lost, and which was no longer available on my contract. I'd wager there are many more like me who aren't obsessed with the latest "ooh, shiny". But of course we don't make sufficient money for the marketing spods.

ISIS operates a crypto help desk – report


Re: "university education"

@ codejunky

"tories taking the centre left position labour vacated"

Really?! Presumably you think Genghis Khan was some kind of liberal do-gooder? Since when have huge cuts in government spending, selling off pretty much everything left that's state owned (deliberately at bargain prices for your mates in the City) and privatising the NHS been a "centre left position"?

He's a Seoul Man: Jeff Bezos' Amazon AWS in Korea-defining move


Didn't read the article,

Just logged in to congratulate whichever sub came up with the headline. Another El Reg winner.

You're right to fear a second dot-com crash, says Intel VC boss


This, on the day after a company that makes mobile phone games was deemed to be more valuable than the GDP of a few dozen individual countries:



Oh no, no bubble here sir. Move along, nothing to see, everything's under control...

Apple Watch sales in death dive after mega launch, claims study


They have their uses

A plumber friend o'mine has one. He's an Apple fanboi anyway, and it's synced to his iPhone. He leaves the phone on the nearest clean surface, then he can answer even when holding tools, or

with hands full of gunk (not sure how he accepts those calls, mind), or when lying under someone's bath. I daresay other tradespeople could have a similar use. But as for the rest of us...

Why voice and apps sometimes don't beat an old-fashioned knob


Re: This won't affect me.

"As I've said many times, it'll be a cold day in hell before I let my fridge order my milk."

Ditto. A couple of things I've never understood about this 'your fridge will re-order for you' tripe. A) do people really eat/drink the same things week in, week out? And b) if you're going on holiday you wouldn't want it to re-order until the day before you get back, so presumably there'd be some 'I'm going on holiday from [date] to [date]' setting - which your friendly neighbourhood hacker/burglar will detect and store for later use.

If anyone hasn't yet read the winning entry in the BBC's recent kiddie short story competition, I'd highly recommend you do so - it's an even better take on a potential IoT future than this Reg. article: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-32927550

Attack of the possibly-Nazi clone parakeet invaders


Indian, not South American

The ones that have colonised most of SE England (and parts beyond) are ring-necked parakeets, which are of Indian / north African in origin. I haven't seen any of the South American varieties. Maybe we can get them together in a fight to the death, then let loose the magpies on the winning but weakened side.



Re: below is a list where DRM successfully stopped piracy

... and of a similar vintage to 2000AD, emblazoned on the back of a certain north eastern heavy metal band's LPs: "Home taping is killing music ... and so are Venom".

Saudis go ape, detain Swedish monkeys at border


Re: Thank gawdess the poor little critters didn't get shipped! @Jake

"It's a shame that the lessons of a century of marginal British colonial policy in the Middle East have been ignored by the western governments since the second world war, as it was clear at the end of the Victorian era that the best thing that can be done was to stop interfering, and accept these people will find their own form of government."

Unfortunately the interfering goes back beyond WW2 - the Sykes-Picot stitch-up after WW1 ignored those same lessons and created arbitary and artificial borders to meet UK / French military and business interests, not those of the people who actually lived there. It's pretty much gone Pete Tong ever since, starting with the Kurdish rebellion in 1920.

Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Smažený sýr


Haven't been to Prague in over a decade but there was a little hole-in-the-wall caff in a small shopping arcade half-way up Wenceslas Square that AFAIR just sold Smazeny Syr, for a few crowns. Just across the arcade was a '50 flavours of ice cream' diner. All the major food groups in one handy location. Wonderful stuff. They've probably been bulldozed and turned into a lap dancing club now though...

2015 will be the Year of Linux on the, no wait, of the dot-word domain EXPLOSION


Re: Cry me a river

Or in the case of my step-daughter, typing "Google" into the search box at the top-right of the screen (the one with the big 'G' next to it), THEN using the resulting site to search for "Facebook" ... I've given up on that argument.

UKIP website TAKES A KIP, but for why?


Re: They arent a serious party..

"And I suppose you think 60% of voters in clacton are racists/homophones/whatever?

Or just maybe there is a problem with massive immigration onto a small island with already overstretched resources and thats reflected in the rise of a party that a large proportion of the population feels reflects their views."

During the by-elections there were several newspaper reports of UKIP supported complaining how their previous Tory MP "had done nothing for us" and that the "new" UKIP MP would be so much better. I'm not sure how seriously we should take someone who can't even work out that it was **actually the same person**.

Welsh council rapped for covert spying on sick leave worker


Or possibly the worker had a history of spurious sick leave and senior management were getting fed up of it?

Rare Stegosaurus skeleton moves into plush London pad


No clue about how it died?

I blame Xenu!

Welcome the world's new Most Phished Country: Australia


Plain text emails. There's a reason.

Thank god for that Thunderbird option. Shame it's not available as a generic setting in some other commonly-used email clients. Then those pesky hsbc.com.givemeyourmoney.ru links would be so much easier to spot.

Was Earth once covered in HELLFIRE? No – more like a wet Sunday night in Iceland


Re: Early civilizations!

Of course. When else do you think the Cthulu era occurred?


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