Re: For that you need (new term) OLED
"Or Enhanced Bass sound"
Would that be the Enhanced Billy Bass talking fish sound?
Posts by earl grey
1136 posts • joined 28 Sep 2011
Ten new tech terms I learnt this summer: Do you know them all?
Re: "weaved"
"But there's also the people who say "I have went"."
Everyone knows it's I done gone.
User filed fake trouble tickets to take helpful sysadmin to lunches
Re: Has a customer ever apologised to you?
Gaaah...I can hear that playing in my head now.
HMS Frigatey Mcfrigateface given her official name
City class names are ok
Thank your stars they aren't being named for the residents of No 10, or we would have HMS Bint.
190 Cray employees hosed down with shower of pink slippery
AI bots will kill us all! Or at least may seriously inconvenience humans
Ox cart speeds
Pah! Everyone knows that ox carts should never exceed the speed of a sheep in a vacuum (or warp 9.9).
John McAfee plans to destroy Google. Details? Ummm...
Re: I'm a statistic
Thank you. Frankly, that was the first thing that popped into my head on reading this article.
I'm number 69.
UK regulator set to ban ads depicting bumbling manchildren
Jodie Who-ttaker? The Doctor is in
Re: What about the shark?
Yeah, yeah. Next thing you'll be telling us is the shark is delivering candygrams.
Re: ... suspenders
I guess it all depends on whether your mean "boy" suspenders or "girl" suspenders now, don't it??
Same whingers who don't like the new female Jane Tennison
After all, the old one was, erm... wait a mo....
Doctor Nurse
For some reason makes me think of Doctor Girlfriend.
I know, not related at all; just two random brain cells rubbing together.
Just in time for summer boozing: Boffins smash world record for the most perfect ice cubes
Zero accidents, all of your data – what The Reg learnt at Bosch's autonomous car bash
Re: Cars withe EULA
"tracking your eye movements"
I just hope they're not tracking my hand movements.
Brit teen accused of running malware factory and helpdesk for crims
Boffins with frickin' laser beams chase universe's mysterious trihydrogen
"elucidated in 1925"
That impressed the hella out of me. Even though they're probably no longer around; drinks to those 1925 boffins.
BOFH: That's right. Turn it off. Turn it on
New work: Algorithms to give self-driving cars 'impulsive' human 'ethics'
Re: Pick your ethics
Can we make it a game for points? Death race 2000 style? Ms. May riding on a albino drop bear on the back of jeremy. More points if you get 'em all.
yeah, i'm not quite ready
For a car that sacrifices me for toddlers, pensioners, bikers, or anyone else in the road who doesn't belong on the lane i'm in. no thank you.
Tape lives! The tape archive bit bucket is becoming bottomless
It's time for a long, hard mass debate over sex robots, experts conclude
Microsoft boasted it had rebuilt Skype 'from the ground up'. Instead, it should have buried it
Re: El Reg reached out ...
I think they meant reached out with a bat. A couple of good hits might knock some sense into someone at MS.
PCs will get pricier and you're gonna like it, say Gartner market shamans
Extreme trainspotting on Britain's highest (and windiest) railway
Thank you
Liked this a lot. Reminded me to go look up some info on the five inclines they used to have in Cincinnati that i saw the remnants of maybe 45 years ago. Brakes be a good think when you read about those old systems.
Photobucket says photo-f**k-it, starts off-site image shakedown
Re: Lolwut
"in your circumscribed universe"
Sorry, i read that as circumcised and didn't understand what all the snipping was about.
Maybe she knows.
rattlesnake in a pinata... ®
Ok, I'll bite...erm....
New keyboard please; I may have to borrow that phrase. Let me know where to send the payments.
Wanna tap 3 MEELLION phone calls? All it takes is one measly warrant
Re: Wanna tap 3 MEELLION phone calls?
I think i just got the nauseam part just reading that.
Exposed pipes – check. Giant pillows – check. French startup mega-campus opens
Re: Just wondering
That's actually pedobear. Good to see they have all the bases covered.
French general accused of nicking fast jet for weekend trips to the Sun
want
Want that little baby jet in my garage for weekend trips to... erm, it's all for business.
Search results suddenly missing from Google? Well, BLAME CANADA!
Re: No results for Equustek
Google could easily return zero results on a search for "bleep" and claim they have no way to differentiate between legit and illegit references.
Nice little business you had there; too bad nobody can find it any more. Let them use BING!
Breaking news, literally: Newspaper's quakebot rumbled for fake story
Linus Torvalds slams 'pure garbage' from 'clowns' at grsecurity
Canadian sniper makes kill shot at distance of 3.5 KILOMETRES
"idiot was a nutter who had mental issues "
That's pretty much every religion. And yes, they're all over the world.
Genoans flout terror ban with bumper basil hand baggage policy
Mint sauce for Wales.
I've heard of mind sauce for mutton, but never seen a big enough barrel for a whale, much less a pod.
BOFH: Putting the commitment into committee
Report estimates cost of disruption to GPS in UK would be £1bn per day
Re: That's why the EU has started Galileo...
That fully operational reminds me of some other space based thing....
BOFH: Halon is not a rad new vape flavour
Banking websites are 'littered with trackers' ogling your credit risk
Re: Not surprising
So sorry. I read: " raw server logs" as raw sewage logs.
It's probably about the same.
Five Eyes nations stare menacingly at tech biz and its encryption
Re: Guarantee a backdoor into every PC in a country and they will come.
My kids never had tantrums because they simply weren't allowed. period. no exceptions and no extremes.
Privacy = virginity
Once it's gone; it's gone forever. It doesn't matter when, how, who, or what kind of story you have about it; it's gone.
PC, Ethernet and tablet computer pioneer 'Chuck' Thacker passes
Another loss for mankind
We're getting poorer by the day. Condolences to friends and family.
Speaking in Tech: Googlers don't like googling. It's a fool's gerund*
IBM will soon become sole gatekeepers to the realm of tape – report
AWS launches celebrity-spotting-as-a-service: What a time to be alive
NSFW would help
thanks, but i have to go clear cache and files and who knows what all. I can't afford to have that seen on my work computer.
My unpopular career in writing computer reviews? It's a gift
Re: You can probably get Microsoft to give you Windows 10...
I expect even anti-virals wouldn't help much; nor would anti-fungals or simply anitbiotics. Best to wear those gloves someplace you really need protection.
Alphabet offloads bot businesses Boston Dynamics and SCHAFT
have one for the weekend
Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about? (Shaft)
Right on
Isaac Hayes - Theme From Shaft
