* Posts by Wupspups

88 posts • joined 28 Sep 2011


HMRC: 30 months to prep Northern Ireland backstop systems, 24 for customs


Re: So this is what Brexiteers meant by "Quick and simple."

"Things could have been very different had a Brexiteer been in charge."

Yes there should have been a Brexiteer in charge. But oh yes didn't the brexiteer prime candidate for the job, BoJo Johnston get back stabbed by his fellow Brexiteer Pob Gove. BoJo then burst in to tears and flung his teddy out the pram stormed of in a huff leaving a bunch of no hopers to face down Sturmbahnfuhrer May.

You got to be in it to win it.

F***=off, Google tells its staff: Any mention of nookie now banned from internal files, URLs



They can go and wurdle their futtocks with a shrieving woggle! Its an old west country habit you know.

Do not adjust your set, er, browser: This is our new page-one design



"We have improved our website says the designers."

"Have you?", says I, "Looks like you were on acid when you did it. And pretty crap acid at that"

Mobileye's autonomous cars are heading to California. But they're not going to kill anyone. At least not on purpose


Autonomous cages? Why the image of a motorcycle?

Interesting article. Often wondered how autonomous cars would cope in a mixed traffic situation with assorted styles of meatbag driving. I suppose the real test would be the Paris in the rush hour round the Arc d'Triumph or Milan at any time.

And whats with the pic of an Andrea Dovizioso's Moto GP crash? Doesnt make sense.

Facebook tried to access and match medical data – report


Re: Is that the reason for havinig a "Zuckerberg General Hospital"...

Sadly no. Its amazing what 75 meeellion spondolics will get you.

Mm, sacrilicious: Greggs advent calendar features sausage roll in a manger


Re: Freya is comparable to Venus or Aphrodite.

A most excellent reference Sir! Tis a pity most will not get it.

Right where is Olaf with the weed!

Wheels are literally falling off the MoD thanks to lack of cash


Wheels falling off landies?

In one the MOD's let cut something moments they got rid of those fine lads and lassies of the Army Catering Corps. Now the army is fed by a bunch of rip off merchants selling barely edible food.

In the past the ACC provided high quality stodge and plenty of it. So squaddies were on the rather hefty side. Now this came useful when checking wheel nuts as torque wrenches were few and far between and normally only trusted to the lads of the LAD (Light Aid Detachment a unit's vehicle service department). On tightening up of said vehicle wheel nuts common practice (well BOAR 1970-90s) was to get a hefty chap to stand on the wheel brace till the nut was tight.

With our now contract fed squaddies hefty chaps are not so common and hence wheel nuts are not getting tightend as well as the used to be.

I shall now get my coat with the yellow handbag of Herfie pils in it.

Dyson to build electric car that doesn't suck


Re: re: I'm just curious as to why

Dont know where you got the 80 quid for a Dyson handheld more like 130 for bottom end model and a rip off 400 smackers for the top end.

RIP Stanislav Petrov: Russian colonel who saved world from all-out nuclear war


Re: Did we forget?

I do remember being on the Brit part of Able Archer 83 in 1BR Corps HQ and watching the little orange mushrooms being placed on the big map table. I asked on of the staff officers who's nukes were those. His answer "Ours how did you think we were going to stop them!"

US cops point at cell towers and say: Give us every phone number that's touched that mast


Re: Data for Sale

> You can find the owner , and by extension - address , of a car from its reg in Norway?

Not only that you can find out how much they earn and their tax returns as well (All tax and earnings have been public knowledge in Norway since the 1800s)


UK publishes Laws of Robotics for self-driving cars


Organisational security is owned, governed and promoted at board level;

Fat chance of that when the board is beholden to the shareholders!

Ofcom: Blighty has devolved into a nation of unwashed binge-streaming mole people


Re: Newsflash @Richard 81

Bored now..............

Disneyland to become wretched hive of scum and villainy


Always follow Tuco's advice

When you have to shoot...Shoot! Don't talk

It's time for a long, hard mass debate over sex robots, experts conclude


Its the spirit of the age.

Your android replica is playing up again

It's no joke

When she comes she moans another's name

But that's the spirit of the age, that's the

Spirit of the age

How to avoid getting hoodwinked by a DevOps hustler



I used to have a boss who called anyone who self claimed to be an expert an "exspurt". Expsurt being defined as; "ex - a has been" and "spurt - a drip under pressure"

Been a pretty good definition for dealing with some "experts" I have had to deal with

Blighty's first aircraft carrier in six years is set to take to the seas


Re: Ma be a silly question

They could but that would probably unbalance the props, then FUBAR the propshaft, cause so much vibration on the ship that it will be unbearable to work on. If the vibration is sufficient and of the right frequency expect fitting such as piping to crack and cable racking to come of their mounts.


And in the news today 26 June 26-06-2014

30 Years after she was first launched the aircraft carrier HMS Queen Elizabeth gets her first compliment of aircraft. Spokesman for the Royal Navy Captain Ebeneezer Jon Nunky Pertwee said "Today a wonderful day for the Royal Navy and for HMS Queen Elizabeth to get her first flight of Fairey Swordfish aircraft. While not the originally specified aircraft it was the best we could afford"


Re: Dang, I forgot

Just hope luvable Leslie isnt navigating. Or they will need Nunky and his tug

State of DevOps: Everyone's slinging code out faster


Quality beats quantity

I'd rather someone takes their time and gets it right first time. Rather than punting dodgy code out to users who then whinge like hell because the new super dooper application is a pile of dog droppings.

Blighty bloke: PC World lost my Mac Mini – and trolled my blog!


Every days a school day

So DPD is Dynamic Parcel Distribution well that it a misdescription going by the drivers that deliver here. They have parcels and they distribute them, but the dynamic thing not so sure about.

PC World and DPD not a good combination

BOFH: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back


Re: One master... and one apprentice


Prisoners built two PCs from parts, hid them in ceiling, connected to the state's network and did cybershenanigans


Careful users

I'm impressed that the builders of these PCs even had anti-virus software (clamwin) installed. Oh that other users were so diligent.

Eric S. Raymond says you probably fit one of eight tech archetypes


Two more for the list

You can also add "smarmy assed know it all". Knows everything, master of everything,has done everything, doesnt need to be told anything, refuses to believe that anyway but his way is possible.

Then there is the "rolling road block" . Nothing will work. He tried to do that but couldnt get it to work, so you have no chance of getting it to work. Even if you do get it to work it will be a pile of crap.

Brexit White Paper published: Broad strokes, light on detail


Good ol Liechtenstein ehh. They are going to help us.

Nice to see that the country that has the fastest growth for our exports is Liechtenstein (population about the size of Redcar). Well that's OK then

2016. AI boffins picked a hell of a year to train a neural net by making it watch the news


I could do this

Mind you my database would only need the words; "waffle", "bullshit","drivel" and "poppycock" init

Early indications show UK favouring 'hard Brexit', says expert


Re: so

Hello Purchase Tax.

Three outsources staff to Capita


Same old, same old.

"We will now work hard to ensure all employees affected by this change are fully supported and we will be commencing consultations with them.”

Or, "We will have a couple of meetings with them. Talk a lot of bull hockey. Then kick them out and give them not another thought."

Meet Deliveroo's ‘bold and impactful’ new logo. No, really


Remind me more of the old motorcycle couriers that used to kamikaze all over the place in late 80s/early 90s. Pretty much the same employment system to. Riders were self employed in most of the courier companies.

That Public Health study? No, it didn't say 'don't do chemo'


UK Big Data boffins not up to the task?

What intrigues me is why is some Aussie academic and not a UK one is crunching NHS data. Arent our big data boffins up to the task?

Got to dash out for some rubber johnnies? Amazon has a button for that



For when you run out of Nerf darts and Playdoh.

NHS injects tender for PC and peripherals kit with £500m


New PCs with XP that is.

Our local hospital and quacks are still running XP. On brand new boxes too.

Wonder if that £500M is enough to buy some Micky Micro$oft support for a year or 2

Teen thugs lure, rob Pokemon Go gamers


Re: or...

That would be 10 drums of ammunition actually. Lewis gun never used ammo belts.

What Brexit means for you as a motorist


Re: Passport, driving licence validity(@ Conrad Longmore)

Of course, an easy solution to this issue would be the UK govt. swapping the old EU passports for the new UK ones for free and with minimum hassle for citizens. But again, past experiences don't give too much hope of this happening.

I bet they charge twice as much as a standard 10 year renewal.

Deploying software every day is... actually... OK – what devs tell their real-life friends


"One possible explanation is that low performers ignore critical rework so they can push new features, but it’s highly likely this is at the expense of racking up technical debt.”

Or maybe they are actually sorting the bugs out and doing proper testing and not introducing new bugs.

Maplin Electronics demands cash with menaces


Maplin Masters of the huge markup

I just about fell of my seat last week when a colleague told me how much they had paid for a few passive components. 1000% markup on 1% metal film resistors.

And don't get me started about the quality of their tools. I've seen harder plasticine.

Blighty's Virgin Queen threatened with foreign abduction


According to Royal Museums Greenwich, "The portrait is in a fragile state". What's the betting that if they get hold of said portrait of Queenie they'll be after a few more pennies to restore it? A couple of million quid would probably do no doubt.

A UK digital driving licence: What could possibly go wrong?


Re: It Bodes

As a non smart phone owning person will they buy me one to hold my funky new "its digital it can't go wrong driving license on" ? Cos I sure wont.

UK.gov pays four fellows £35k to do nothing for three months


Not just money

Many moons ago I had the joy of serving in BAOR. One of the weirdness I could never get over was the annual lets go crazy and fire crates of ammo off. The reason for this was if we didnt fire our allotment of training ammo off next years allotment would get cut.

The reason for this was we weren't infantry so didnt get first dibs on the ranges, add to that we spent 4 months of the year on non live firing exercises so often ended up doing only 3 or 4 range days a year. We were supposed to do 12. The quartermaster always said if we didnt blast all the training ammo of come next year we wouldn't get enough if we did get our 12 days on the ranges. So a new QM arrives and he doesnt do the mad day of blasting off. We get the ammo cut and yes the next year we got our 12 days but only had enough ammo for 4 days.

Canny Canadian PM schools snarky hack on quantum computing


Re: Angela Merkel

The same could be said for Margaret Hilda Roberts. First UK PM with a science degree and look where that got us.

I am sending pouting selfies to a robot. Its AI is well buff


The Rynkl team, is that a hip way of saying a bunch of wrinklies?

Vulture conservationists hatch cunning 3-D printed egg plan


Re: Diclofenac

And its side effects are not to nice in humans. I lasted about a day on it after a knee op. Throwing up and diarrhoea simultaneously are not fun

BOFH: Sure, I could make your cheapo printer perform miracles


BOFH with patience?

IS Simon getting more patient with with users? Seemed to have taken ages to get to the ambulance stage.

Field technicians want to grab my tool and probe my things


Re: Do not speak of what thou knowest little....

Have a thumbs up for reminding me of the joy of getting zapped by EHT. Almost as enjoyable as getting zapped in the ear by 50 volt ringer voltage when jumpering up new lines on the MDF of a 300 line automatic exchange (uniselector not Strowager)

Brits rattle tin for 'revolutionary' hydrogen-powered car


Company wordsmith?

WTF? Seriously WTF?

And as for it looks like a "superstar's car" I think I may have a different idea of what that may look like.

So where does the hydrogen come from? Magic? It will not eliminate pollution from personal transport so long as we are dependant on coal or hydrocarbon fired power stations.

Back to the Future's DeLorean is coming back to the future


A boot load of coke is available as an upgrade.

US rapper slams Earth is Round conspiracy in Twitter marathon


Smack head me thinks.

Four Boys' Own style World War Two heroes to fire your imagination


You already mentioned Popski's Private Army, but the chap who created the unit Major Vladimir Peniakoff, MC is worth mentioning. Initially a concentious objecter in WWI but eventual served in the French Artillery in WWI as a private because he didnt want to waste his time training as an officer in the british army.

Next Herbert "Blondie" Hasler leader of the Cockleshell Heroes in the Operation Frankton raid against German ships harboured in Bordeaux. Haslers theories and practice where later to be used by the SBS. He was put forward for a VC but it wasnt granted. Hasler after the war went on to invent the Hasler Self Steering Gear for yachts that allowed single handed sail across large expanses of see. He also instituted the Observer Single Handed Transatlantic Race which he aslo raced in. He came 2nd to Sir Francis Chichester.

Third and sort of communications related on Thomas "Darkie" Waters a corporal in the Royal Crops of Signals. Waters was a wireless and line operator (though the old linemen(aka "lineys") of theSignals used to clain he was one of theirs) Waters was attached to 5 Para Brigade for the raid on Peagus Bridge in Caen. During the attack on the bridge Cpl Waters rescued a wounded comrade. Repaired a communications line multiple time under fire. He was awarded a MM. Water was later wounded trying to protect other soldier during a training excerise when a pin was pulled from a grenade. He Lost an eye and had a metal plate fitted to his head. Almost every Sergents mess in the Royal Corps of Signals has a copy of the painting by Peter Archer of Corporal Waters legging it across Pegasus bridge with reel of D8 line to repair another cut line. His example is used by the Signals to emphasise "comms must get through no matter what

The BBC's Space: A short history of 21st Century indoor relief

Black Helicopters

State-owned, collectivised server farms

Run by GCHQ I guess?

What the Investigatory Powers Bill will mean for your internet use

Big Brother

Surely the only way Google knows what you have searched for only if you log in to Google? (and why would you want to do that)

I survived a head-on crash with driverless cars – and dummies


"There’s a certain impotence when you’re sat there, with the tools to control life or death for yourself, your passengers and anyone else who crosses your path, and you’re locked out, in the hands of the machine. In the driving seat, but not driving."

And there in rather a long sentence is the whole problem with driverless cars. Human being don't like to feel impotent. They want to feel in control. I know I do. If I am a passenger in a car I cant sit in the front because I am constantly checking the traffic, trying to look at the instruments. God forbid that we have to emergency brake because my right foot is pushing that imaginary brake pedal


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