* Posts by Anonymous Cowerd

182 publicly visible posts • joined 9 Sep 2011

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London councils seek assurance over Capita's India offshoring plans

Anonymous Cowerd
Coat

They stay over there...

taking our jobs...

Windows 10 market share stalls after free upgrade offer ends

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: Windows 10

Yeah, I upgraded from Win 7 to Win 10 and it bricked my machine.

I reinstalled Win 7 and have never looked back.

Apple rushes out iOS 10.1.1 fix after health data flat lines

Anonymous Cowerd

Perhaps they could release an update...

...that allows me to delete their crappy health app that I don't actually want and can't get rid of.

Digi minister Matt Hancock: Britain needs go full fibre. And we're not paying for it

Anonymous Cowerd

My father lives in Hull...

His comments about the (monopoly) broadband are unprintable.

User couldn't open documents or turn on PC, still asked for reference as IT expert

Anonymous Cowerd
Facepalm

turning a PC on...

I found my old boss looking puzzled by one of our test machines. Apparently it was refusing to boot up.

I checked all the connections - all ok - then asked him to try to switch it on again.

"Aha! I know what the problem is!"

"So what is it?"

"You're trying to eject a floppy disc. The on-button is that one."

MOM: CHEAP Mars ship got it right first time. Nice one, India

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: 1st time out with a significant science payload is *very* impressive.

Presumably, they learnt from the previous errors of other nations...

GCHQ protesters stick it to British spooks ... by drinking urine

Anonymous Cowerd

sounds like section 44

which can make it illegal to take photos in certain places

their problem (the police) is that they aren't allowed to reveal if you are in a section 44 area or not

Felony charges? Harsh! Alleged Anon hackers plead guilty to misdemeanours

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: It's simple

I think we can all see who's "braindead and clueless" here...

LOHAN acquires aircraft arboreal avoidance algorithm acronyms

Anonymous Cowerd

AT-AT

Avoiding Trees And Things

Anonymous Cowerd

Branch Avoidance Positional System

Anonymous Cowerd

TASK

Tree Avoidance Survival Kit

Not very racy, I know.

Amazon smacks back at Hachette in e-book pricing battle: We're doing it for the readers

Anonymous Cowerd

There's a great dissection of the email here :

http://matt-wallace.com/?p=326

World first: ANIMATED GIF of Mercurian SUN ZOOM from MARS

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: Wonder when is the next transit of Earth?

Next one is 10th November 2084

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transit_of_Earth_from_Mars

Surprise! Google chairman blasts EU's privacy ruling

Anonymous Cowerd
Facepalm

There will be no new jobs because it will cost them money.

Instead, they'll just automate the removal process.

Then we'll have people deleting anything they don't like.

Earth cops first asteroid impact of 2014

Anonymous Cowerd

first?

First observed surely.

The Vulture 2: What paintjob should we put on our soaraway spaceplane?

Anonymous Cowerd

Orange - it's the same as Ms Lohan's natural colour

and will be easier to find when it finally comes back down to earth, especially if the GPS fails.

Star Wars revival secret: This isn't the celluloid you're looking for

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

@Irongut

Jabba did not appear in the original cinema release in 1977. The "fat bloke" scene was filmed with the intention of adding a stop motion Jabba but was ultimately cut.

It did feature in some later releases with a CGI Jabba, but you can do your own homework.

Super-SVELTE BLUSH-PINK planet goes too far with star

Anonymous Cowerd
Holmes

You had to explain the meaning of exoplanet?

Seriously???

UK parliament presses for pardon for Alan Turing

Anonymous Cowerd

Tommy Flowers

Turing is rightly recognised for his work.

It's a pity Tommy Flowers never got the same reognition.

PRISM scandal: Brit spooks operated within the law, say politicos

Anonymous Cowerd
Black Helicopters

Well, they would say that...

wouldn't they?

Apple reveals payouts for parents of in-app purchase nippers

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: Chest of Gems

Most kids have no concept of the cost of things.

Ask my 7 year-old niece what she'd like for her birthday. She'll probably say a pony, or some crayons.

Thanks, NSA: Amazon sales of Orwell's 1984 rise 9,500%

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

@Winkypop re: anonymous coward

"..says an anonymous coward..."

Whereas, of course, Winkypop is your real name...

FLABBER-JASTED: It's 'jif', NOT '.gif', says man who should know

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

"that is how we in Blighty used to pronounce it"

No it isn't.

explanation here

British LulzSec hackers hear jail doors slam shut for years

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

Re: Weak Security

"It makes no difference if my front door has a simple lock or a more convoluted affair, but regardless anyone getting into my home and stealing my belongings is a thief."

I hope that is of some comfort to you when the insurance doesn't pay out, because in their view, although he's a thief, you're an idiot.

Stephen Hawking nixes Intel voice upgrade plan

Anonymous Cowerd
Thumb Up

@Kubla Cant

"My impression is that two taps can fill faster than the overflow drain can empty."

Yes. Mine does that. I've flooded my bathroom on more than one occasion.

Fanbois vs fandroids: Punters display 'tribal loyalty'

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

huh?

My first phone was a Philips, my second a Nokia, my third a Sony Ericsson. My fourth and current phone is an Apple, but my fifth one won't be.

Other than that, I've always bought from the same manufacturer as last time.

P2P badboys The Pirate Bay kicked out of Greenland: Took under 48 hours

Anonymous Cowerd
Headmaster

Re: similies (sic)

Assuming that you meant similes, they aren't incorrect similes.

They are incorrect metaphors.

Attention, CIOs: Stop outsourcing or YOU will never retire

Anonymous Cowerd
Unhappy

Re: You can if you pretend it is a different job...

Exactly what is happening to me. Getting made redundant because my skills "won't be suitable for supporting the new application", even though it's just a rebadged clone of the original app. Same database, same languages, almost identical data model.

Apparently some cowboys in India are going to do my job now...

Raspberry Pi-powered Tardis blasts off from 'Blighty's Baikonur'

Anonymous Cowerd
Happy

:)

beat me to it!

Anons hack Asteroids into US DoJ website in Swartz death protest

Anonymous Cowerd

@Oninoshiko

"As a point of fact, the only one of those acoustic couplers I've ever actually seen, was 300 baud. Wackypedia claims the practical limit was 1200 baud"

As my father in 1983/4 had an acoustic coupler with a switch to choose between 800 and 1200 baud, I'd say you haven't looked very far.

Nuisance calls DOUBLE, Ofcom vows to hunt down offenders

Anonymous Cowerd
Thumb Up

Re: No it doesn't

Yeah, I had a cold call from BT yesterday, even though I'm on TPS.

Brazilian slammer guards nab mobe-smuggling CAT

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

@Chrome

Sounds like trout a la creme to me...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dkjbMoj0JY4

Up your wormhole: Star Trek Deep Space 9 turns 20

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

Terry Farrell - Dutch?

...like James T Kirk, she's from Iowa...

Google can't use finger-fumble patent to poke Apple - Trade panel

Anonymous Cowerd
Holmes

America's trade commission

is biased towards American companies?

No shit, Sherlock.

It's official: Mac users are morally superior to Windows users

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

Re: ball's

I would love you to summon the intelligence to use apostrophes correctly, stupid.

Coming soon to a theme park near you: Shocking ANTI-PIRACY NAG ADS

Anonymous Cowerd
Pirate

Nagware just antagonises customers

Will these media distributors please stop suggesting I'm a potential thief every time I buy a legitimate DVD?

It's no wonder people get pirate copies - at least they don't get insulted before they watch the movie on those.

Apple, Samsung patent judge: 'I feel like I'm in Groundhog Day here'

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

re "Only morons resort to physical violence"

That's up there with

"War! What is is good for?"

Well, ridding Europe of a genocidal megalomaniac about 70 years ago for starters.

Word wonks insist GIFs are really JIFs

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: Was the vulture logo created by a jiffics artist on jiff paper?

Here in the UK we also pronounce it 'kicks'

Education Secretary Gove: Tim Berners-Lee 'created the INTERNET'

Anonymous Cowerd
Facepalm

*facepalm*

sigh

British car parks start reading number plates

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

"eventually a fine will be issued"

No it won't. These are not fines.

A speculative invoice will be issued, which will be ignored.

Apple: Blue-shirts can fix iOS Maps in their spare time

Anonymous Cowerd
Stop

Re: Noone made you upgrade.

I didn't. Lots of people did and were caught unawares by this pile of crap.

Doesn't alter the fact that apple should at least allow them to revert to the last known good OS.

Anonymous Cowerd
Unhappy

If Apple actually gave a shit...

...they'd let us revert to iOS 5.1.1. until this cr-app is sorted out.

New I-hate-my-neighbour stickers to protect Brits' packages

Anonymous Cowerd
Stop

Re: lockbox

That might work if it wasn't for the fact that my postie seems to change every couple of months. Royal Mail don't seem to rotate them, rather than letting them have dedicated routes.

Anyway, I expect a lockbox code would end up on a post-it for everyone at the sorting office to make a note of.

Governments block YouTube over that video

Anonymous Cowerd

It isn't about some crap video

That's just a pretext for behaving as they have wanted to for some time...

Dropbox drops JavaScript, brews CoffeeScript

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

if it ain't broke

don't waste money fixing it...

Mozilla dumps iOS, pulls Firefox Home from iTunes Store

Anonymous Cowerd
Unhappy

Re: "The appeal of iOS is that it's locked-down: everything is secure"

That's precisely what doesn't appeal to me (and why my next phone is not going to be another iPhone)

You'll be on a list 3 hrs after you start downloading from pirates - study

Anonymous Cowerd
Stop

Re: Public domain

"You can connect to a torrent swarm without uploading or downloading any data"

Yes, but to prove those IP addresses are infringing copyright you would either need to download the file and look at it (woe betide you if it was somebody else's copyrighted material in there), or be a seeder of the file (then you've implicitly given permission for it to be downloaded and there is no infringement).

Otherwise, the file could be full of any old crap. It could even be copyrighted material that the downloader already has permission to download.

Anonymous takes down UK government websites in Assange attack

Anonymous Cowerd
FAIL

re : "The helicopter was under direct threat of being shot down by people with an RPG launcher"

Except it wasn't.

It was a camera with a telephoto lens.

RIP Harry Harrison: Stainless Steel Rat scurries no more

Anonymous Cowerd

Re: In Memory of Me

Just what I was thinking, it's only the film where it's made from people...

RBS: June's tech enormo-cock-up cost us £125m

Anonymous Cowerd
WTF?

"RBS's software glitch"?

As far as I know, the glitch occurred in a piece of wetware.

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