* Posts by wolfetone

3268 posts • joined 6 Aug 2011

User left unable to type passwords after 'tropical island stress therapy'

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Government staff: need I say more?

It isn't the preserve of Government staff. It's any staff that thinks they're above having to use a computer, and above having to learn or appreciate how to use one.

My mother-in-law-to-be is one of these. Refuses to use a computer, then wonders why I don't help her when she's stuck with something. This causes problems between me and the wife-to-be, and she doesn't like it when I tell her I've already shown her that twice, she should have remembered what I did and done it.

Don't panic, but your Bitcoins may just vanish into the ether next month

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Bitcoin is bound to collapse in value prior to this date

You're referring to Ethereum. It's a good crypto currency, but it's still recovering from a flash crash when there were rumours that the founder died. It went from £200 to 10p but recovered.

There's a lot of talk about Litecoin, and how that's the Silver to BitCoin's Gold.

But it's all speculation about which will do well etc. No one ever dreamed BitCoin would be worth £1,700 per coin as of writing. Anything can happen.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: How about caps?

Already on that. I've accumulated about 586 bottle caps.

Not because of BitCoin, but because if gaming has taught me anything its that a post nuclear world revolves around bottle caps.

What did OVH learn from 24-hour outage? Water and servers do not mix

wolfetone Silver badge

Ah, if only 123-Reg followed OVH's lead in being so open about their fuck ups.

Virgin Trains dodges smack from ICO: CCTV pics of Corbyn were OK

wolfetone Silver badge

"Is wolfetone really Wolfie Smith?"

No, I'm not.

I'm much better looking.

wolfetone Silver badge

"What about investigating Corbyn for making bogus claims now? Surely there should be some sort of investigation into that?"

He was walking past first class seats he didn't have a ticket for? So er, what's bogus about that? He's an MP so he should pay for a first class ticket?

But yeah, fully agree there should be an investigation in to that. Shortly after one is conducted in to the Tory election fraud that happened 2 years ago, the election fraud that occured in this election just gone, and how Theresa May could find £1 billion to bribe the DUP to back her government while simultaneously sticking two fingers up to the nurse who was told "There is no magic money tree" when she asked for a raise and to the Good Friday Agreement that her deal ultimately destroys.

Over to you, sir.

Adult toy retailer slapped down for 'RES-ERECTI*N' ad over Easter

wolfetone Silver badge

"Oh, you too are of virgin birth!"


wolfetone Silver badge

Christians don't have sex. So it is offensive.

Both my parents are Christian and they never had sex. Not even once. So there!

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Easy Beat Gold Eggs

"I followed the link, I read the details, I watched the video. I still have no idea what it is. In many ways, I'm too old to care anymore."

You tried asking your wife?

Russia, China vow to kill off VPNs, Tor browser

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Resist with crowdfunded RPNs...

"You hit problems with rural areas and also the number of hops between source and destination."

There'll be too busy fox hunting and badger baiting to care or notice.

Ubuntu Linux now on Windows Store (for Insiders)

wolfetone Silver badge

"Well - they've already managed to get Windows-lite[1] into Redhat and all it's little penguins..

[1] Systemd."

Quite right. That is a problem, and it's being addressed within the community.

Systemd is to Linux what athletes foot is to humans. An irritant, but it can be killed off.

wolfetone Silver badge

"Embrace, extend, extinguish."

If you can't beat them, join them.

wolfetone Silver badge

We've won.

Mappy days! Ordnance Survey offers up free map of UK greenery

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Re: mafia

Don't you mean... mapia?

Geddit? Geddit? Eh? Eh?

Better mobe coverage needed for connected cars, says firm flogging networking gear

wolfetone Silver badge

Call me old fashioned, but the fact my car can't connect to Skynet and kill me makes me sleep easy at night.

Microsoft drops Office 365 for biz. Now it's just Microsoft 365. Word

wolfetone Silver badge

Microsoft 365?

So what are they going to do for the 4 days in the year when their server keel over?

Former GCHQ boss backs end-to-end encryption

wolfetone Silver badge

Well if he was in a position that meant anything he definately wouldn't have said what he said.

Good luck building a VR PC: Ethereum miners are buying all the GPUs

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Cmon El Reg

It still makes me cry.

I bought some Ethereum coins in February for £10 each. Got to £30 each, sold them as I needed to fix my car. Didn't look at the price charts until a month ago.

Well, you can imagine what I was thinking when I saw the £30 coins I sold shot up to £290.

Virgin Media biz service goes TITSUP* across London

wolfetone Silver badge

"Surely councils would have a backup link(s) with another provider that would seamlessly fail over..."

That would cost money. And unless you are the Surrey council with a golden handshake deal, you haven't got a fat lot of cash to spend on backups like that.

European MPs push for right to repair rules

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Re : "and LEDs that likewise can't be replaced"

"The object of the game is to not drop the phone in the first place."

Yeah, because gravity never gets the better of us. Does it?

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Re : "and LEDs that likewise can't be replaced"

"Bring back replaceable phone batteries. Not just for longevity but also so that bigger capacities can be installed."

You know you're right. It's been years since I had the misery of dropping a phone, having the back of it fly off and the battery go in the other direction.

The yoof of today don't know the struggle!

wolfetone Silver badge

First thought was "Awesome! I can't wait to..."

The the cold realisation that Brexit means Brexit and that I'll probably never benefit from this rule set in. Depression ensued.

Thanks Nigel, thank you Boris.

Nothing could protect Durex peddler from NotPetya ransomware

wolfetone Silver badge

I thought that's what the wire brush and Dettol was for though?

Feelin' safe and snug on Linux while the Windows world burns? Stop that

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I Feel Safe Today

Because my OS doesn't use systemd.

Create a user called '0day', get bonus root privs – thanks, Systemd!

wolfetone Silver badge

I wonder will we get to a point in the future where Systemd becomes it's own operating system and splits from the Linux community?

I would shed a tear, but the sooner that bollocks Poettering stops being such a clown and takes his abomination systemd with him the better.

He really is the Yoko Ono of Linux.

wolfetone Silver badge

Or for those who don't like getting their hands dirty, Devuan.

El Reg partners with Action for Children to give IT industry an uncomfortable night

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Action Man?

"Modern Kiddiewinkies are far too precious and wrapped in cotton (undyed organic, from a Fairtrade estate naturally) wool to be allowed something as nasty as an Action Man. Action Man is far too politically incorrect."

My first Action Man was the space one, where he had a jet pack and a blue thing that shot out yellow arrows. The second Action Man I had was a swimming one with a canoe. Neither of which are particularly politically insensitive?

I'm fully aware I've just dated myself.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Not interested

^^^ Someone didn't get an Action Man for Christmas one year, decides to be a c**t for the rest of their life.

wolfetone Silver badge

"Action for Children, the UK charity which has been caring and sticking up for vulnerable young people for 150 years."

Such a depressing indictment on the United Kingdom to have to need a charity to look after the young of our country at all, let alone for the last 150 years.

Good luck El Reg, it's a worthy and noble cause.

Nationwide banking suffers its own Black Wednesday

wolfetone Silver badge

Very nearly made the mistake of saying "Why do people still bank with these clowns?", until I re-read the article and I realised it was about Nationwide, not Natwest.

Carry on.

MH370 researchers refine their prediction of the place nobody looked

wolfetone Silver badge

"Australian researchers who haven't given up on finding Malaysian Airlines MH 370 have told a conference in Darwin they believe they know where it is likely to be."

Forgive me when I say "You said that before".

Bonkers call to boycott Raspberry Pi Foundation over 'gay agenda'

wolfetone Silver badge


Sort of what I meant yes.

"Christians being tolerant, but not compromising in their beliefs, would treat gay people as fellow 'sinful' human beings, no worse than anyone else, and would NOT point fingers nor say god hates them. They could still believe in the bible without being asshats. Well, in an ideal world, anyway."

Well yes. Ultimately the thing is to get along with each other, not to be a dick etc. If someone kills someone, it's usually with intent. You chose to do that. So you can rightfully expect that act to be condoned. But to be gay? Like another poster said in regards to some clown who said homosexuality was a lifestyle choice, I can't remember when I chose to be heterosexual. To be gay is to be something you're born as, you have no choice on the matter. You can no more help falling in love with your male best friend than you can the colour of your skin. That bit isn't considered, and if it was then actually Christians shouldn't even consider those who are gay to be sinful.

wolfetone Silver badge

As a Catholic, I'm absolutely outraged that that utter bollocks of a human being was given a keyboard and internet access. I'm also the proud owner of 6 Raspberry Pi's, a bag of Skittles, a Zippy teddy from my yoof, and a Mrs.Doyle costume that I wore for my stag do in Prague as I'm getting married to a woman next month. So to that gorm, how gay am I?

You know what, I read the whole article and there were two things that really got me thinking. The first being what gay agenda the Raspberry Pi had on my desk, and how the f**k Change.org is used. I've signed petitions for various things in the past on that website, but then all I get day in day out is "Why don't you sign this petition to save dogs in Africa" or "Do dying llamas in Tibet mean nothing to you?". Bloody hell, I signed one petition to require cyclists to have insurance and a license and I get all of this blackmail? I digress.

If he was a proper Christian, he'd know the ultimate rule that the world's greatest socialist (that's Jesus, btw) taught was: don't be a dick. Jesus didn't say "God made Adam & Eve, not Adam & Steve", and he definately did not say "Thou shalt not use a Raspberry Pi because it'll make you gay". The ultimate take home message from the Bible is "Don't be a dick". But it pisses me off that the arseholes who attend church on Sunday's, dripping in jewellery and driving their brand new Mercedes Benz cars, turn up because they think by turning up they buy shares in the afterlife. They nod, kneel, chant Amen at various bits and sit their patiently while scripture is read out that basically says "Don't be a dick to your neighbour or the poor bloke on the street. You don't know what they've been through".

The very moment they go out of the church they'll walk past a homeless guy and ignore him. Brilliant. You've spent an hour in church being told to help your fellow man and you walk straight past him. And I bet pounds to doughnuts this utter fucktard of a human being is one of these arseholes.

Happy 4th of July: Norks tests another missile

wolfetone Silver badge

North Korea launches a rocket? Brilliant. But given their track record I'd be more worried if they launched 100 rockets and they were all successful. A lot of the time they test one and it breaks.

Plus, I'm not in America. So er, yeah. Feeling pretty darn safe where I am right now!

Male escort says he gave up IT to do something more meaningful

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: i did this when i was younger

"All it lacked was someone bragging that he'd screwed the gym teacher."

I did try. But I wasn't her type.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: i did this when i was younger

"Whats the "right thing"? I've no regrets. I couldn't imagine going out with some middle age woman when I was younger, I wanted someone who had similar cultural reference points and was fun, not someone boring on about the beetles or presley and her mortgage payments."

Ahhhhh, see now here we have the problem. And this can all be settled with this one line:

I didn't date older women. I shagged them. No relationships, nothing. Just a text or a call to say "You busy? Fancy some fun?" and then in half an hour I'm riding them like a donkey. Again, something women my own age didn't want.

So there.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: i did this when i was younger

"30 years experience with women says otherwise sunshine."

Anyone can have 30 years experience. It doesn't mean you have 30 years of experience doing the right thing.

And, for the record, nothing desperate about it. It just so happened older women were a lot more adventerous in bed, a lot less needy than girls my own age, and all of them had their own place.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: i did this when i was younger

To think that, in my youth, I would chat middle aged women up in clubs and have a wonderful time with them.

No one told me I could've charged them for it!!!!

China pollutes ocean with bloody big rocket

wolfetone Silver badge

Do you think the controller was wondering what was going wrong, then realised he was looking at the wrong screen and was playing KSP instead?

One-third of Brit IT projects on track to fail

wolfetone Silver badge

50% are said to be in denial, while 10% remain smuggly happy that their projects are on time.

NASA: Bring on the asteroid, so we can chuck a fridge at it

wolfetone Silver badge


Give Dave Lister a load of booze and a snooker table, and he'll deal with any asteroids ok?

Fancy fixing your own mobile devices? Just take the display off carefu...CRUNCH !£$%!

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Older audio equipment

I'm glad I'm not the only one who uses old audio tech.

I bought a National Panasonic music centre (the ones with the turntable, tape deck and radio) and it came with some 1980's spec Amstrad speakers. The guy selling it said it comes on, the tape player moves, the turntable moves, but theres no sound. It cost me 99p.

A bit of a fiddle and an hour later, it was working. Sounded a bit funny, but I plugged it in to an Arcam amp from 1984 that I was given for free and a set of Mordant Short speakers, and bloody hell! It sounds awesome.

wolfetone Silver badge

Then you should take it straight to Johnny Ive and tell him that you didn't want a thin iPhone, he did, so he should be made to fix it.

wolfetone Silver badge

We could just buy older tech that is easily repairable?

Wouldn't that be easier?

Guys? Guys it's lonely here!

Fresh cotton underpants fix series of mysterious mainframe crashes

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Re: @wolfetone

"What kind of sysop is that???"

A sysop that gets laid.

US Senators want Kaspersky shut out of military contracts

wolfetone Silver badge

"So, how is Barcelona nowadays?"

I know naaaaaaaaaafing

Ubuntu 'weaponised' to cure NHS of its addiction to Microsoft Windows

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Pipe Dream

"Would that be where Corbyn won an approving tweet from Farage for firing front benchers who voted against the Conservatives?

Labour was the recipient of a large quantity of tactical votes. They were not given for any other reason than people want the conservatives opposed. If Labour stays like Blairs neo-Tories, they will not get those votes next election and more of their supporters will desert them again."

That would be where Umunna decided to be a little prick about things and cause a rebellion on wanting an ammendment that could never happen. Not only did it go against the Labour manifesto that he supported but it also goes against what the country - rightfully or wrongly - voted for.

For the record, I voted to stay in the EU. But I'm not a wanker about it and I accept that it's happened. If the tables were turned, those who voted to stay (who are crying now) would tell those who voted to leave to shut up and accept it.

99% of those who voted know now it's a stupid thing and given the opportunity to vote in a second referendum the result would be completely different by a much bigger majority. That's not going to happen though unfortunately, although it's hard to know what to think when it's getting more obvious by the day that May won't be PM by the time the negotiations are finished, whenever they do finish - as there is scope in the legislation to extend negotiations if it's supported by all involved.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Pipe Dream

"Of itself, there is nothing wrong in out-sourcing some aspects of healthcare to private companies."

There is plenty wrong with it, because private healthcare firms need to turn a profit in order for shareholders to get their investment back. WIth healthcare how do you turn a profit? Something has to go, something has to give.

Private healthcare in the UK is a joke anyway. I don't get it, but I know some who do. One guy I know died recently had cancer. He was fairly well off and had paid in to a private health care fund for as long as he was alive basically. His health care provider deemed his cancer treatment too costly for them to foot the bill for, so he was referred to the NHS.

wolfetone Silver badge

Re: Pipe Dream

"But I sense that Corbyn's Labour party is a different animal, with a genuine commitment to social welfare and the NHS."

I would like to think so, but after Chuka Umunna's stunt yesterday I have the feeling that a lot of them are wearing masks which will slip the moment they get in to power. Corbyn, I feel, is on the button with it and genuine, along with other MP's. But MP's like Mr.Umunna that spent the majority of Corbyn's time in leadership trying to oust him are keeping their heads for the time being.

But they'll be back unless they're rooted out. And until that happens, I don't think the NHS is all that safe from those Labour MP's either.

Virgin Media cuts 250 jobs amid £3bn Project Lightning cockup fallout

wolfetone Silver badge

"We understand that despite the cuts in head office, none will affect directors"

What a fucking surprise.

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