* Posts by croaker

82 posts • joined 13 Jun 2011


Remember CompuServe forums? They're still around! Also they're about to die


Re: 113215,53 reporting in!

"change a few things and then ask them to try again"?

"became somebody else's problem"?

In my department you'd be on a PIP for such random advice ;)

"The day they released the new CIS3.0 software"

LOL. Yeah. I remember the bollocking going all the way up the chain of command and back down into Marketing for that one. Marketing. The bastards. They'd screw us CS team every chance they got.

Shopping for PCs? Ding, dong, the Dock is dead in 2017's new models



Nope, Nope, Nope and Nope. Not for me. Bog standard PC (with Linux) please.

Life after antivirus: Reinventing endpoint security


Re: Missed opportunity for El Reg...


Who do you want to be Who? VOTE for the BBC's next Time Lord


Isn't he The Master?

Bloke launches twinkly range of BBC Micro:bit accessory boards

Thumb Up

x2 NICs

that is all

Firefox bares teeth, attacks sites that collect personal data


Re: Hmmm

Came here to say the exact same thing. Pure extortion.

Over time, I'll be moving my hosting to those companies that do support Let's Encrypt... a big, nasty job that I won't get paid for...

Smart guns are a neat idea on paper. They'll never survive reality



Judge Dredd manages quite successfully with a smart gun. I would suggest that the principle of safety first is sound, it's the technology that isn't up to speed yet. Go back to the drawing board.

No Soylent for Santa after key ingredient supply is choked off


Re: Wrong ingredients

+1 and a pint for the Brunner's "Stand on Zanzibar" reference. A most excellent book

BT's hiring! 500 more customer service folk to answer your angry calls


"Fixing" the wrong thing

It must be cheaper to employ 500 shaved chimps to say the problem's not their fault rather than hire actual engineers to fix the root cause of all these unanswered calls.

UK's Universal Service voucher scheme urged to shift monopoly away from BT

Paris Hilton

BT Thieves

BT have been given the money to supply rural areas. They have not done so and kept it for themselves.

Rather than fannying around with more profit generations schemes for a failed organisation, government should be holding these shysters to account and either get their money back or force BT to implement what they've been paid to do in the first place.

[Paris Hilton icon because she has more of clue that BT management twonks]

Microsoft reveals career-enhancing .PNG files


Not worth the bytes they're written on

that is all

Spinal Tap’s bass player sues former French sewer


The 1984 film is often cited as the best comedy of all time?


Life of Brian.

I rest my case...

Exchange down for Android and iOS users


developers can now sidestep Exchange

What do you mean "now". I've successfully been side-stepping exchange my IT career by employing open standards based protocols and infrastructure instead. Easy.

My business' email is working perfectly on all operating systems and devices*.

* Well except Outlook. Outlook doesn't do IMAP properly but I don't care about that.

Microsoft's Service Fabric for Linux hits public preview


No thanks.

Microsoft thinks time crystals may be viable after all



Do we really want Microsoft fucking around with our time?

They can't even get a web browser to work properly..

BlackBerry snips Alcatel label off a midrange biz 'Droid, sells it for $299



Same Android OS update cycle => non-existent.

Can't rooted

Crap camera

No thanks.

Brexit has left a regulatory black hole for digital, say MPs


Re: So the trouble with taking back control

>> The big problem for the UK government is going to be justifying to the electorate the necessity of keeping the vast majority of EU derived laws in place whether or not we make it into the single market.

Nah. Don't tell them and they won't care. All they care about is less brown people buying houses

Microsoft releases cross-platform .NET Core 1.0 at Linux event


Dear software developers...

Just so you know and before you start work, there's a cat in hell's chance of me using any of your code on my linux boxes if MS's .Net libraries have been used to develop your software.

There's plenty of proper open source enterprise qualities libraries out there. Use them if you want me to use your software.

Don't go chasing waterfalls, please stick... Hang on. They're back


FSS. Agile? Waterfall? Fag packet? Just do what works in your organisation to get the job done.

Getty on Google: It’s all about traffic, duh


60 million images I won't be buying or looking at

As a web developer, I only use Open Sourced or self-created images. I will not buy.

Getty's business model is flawed and it's not Google's fault they can't make money

Facebook tells Viz to f**k right off



My standard response to anyone that says "don't swear"

National Pupil Database engorged to 20 million individual kids' records


Remove names

It shouldn't be rocket science to make the records of school leavers anonymous each July. That way they have the data but it's not linked to an identifiable person for ever.

Whatever, this system should not be Internet facing

Crossroads preps pesky product portfolio selloff


couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of f**g leaches

Samsung trolls Google, adds adblockers to phones


Galaxy Note 2

Recent did this myself on my Galaxy Note 2 since Samsung & O2 refuse to keep Android up to date on it.

Cyanogenmod, Privacy Guard, AdAway, Firefox, Adblock Edge, Ghostery. I now have no adverts anywhere except those sites and Apps I actively want to support (El reg etc.)

I'm back in control and Advertisers can f***k themselves and their malware spewing shite.

For pity's sake, enterprises, upgrade your mobile OS - report



With an old apple device you can't update because they've removed support for it in their update.*

The fix? Buy a new one.


[* generalisation but still true. I know people who have been bitten.]

Learn you Func Prog on five minute quick!


Er. No thanks...

... carries on quite happily as I am...

Doctor Who returns to our screens next week – so, WHO is the worst Time Lord of them all?


Sylvester McCoy

His run was appalling but it wasn't his fault - he did his best with shite scripts, shite special effects and shite supporting actors

Yow! It's the HOT NEW 'Collections' from Google! Oh wait ... it's a Google+ thing


Google+ is...

... Facebook for grown-ups.

I use both. FB for keeping in touch with "friends", G+ for keeping up with Industry & work related groups, news and comment.

There's room for both

Quantum computers have failed. So now for the science


Re: 4 pages ?!

x4 pages = x4 adverts

And they wonder why people use ad-block...

Cloudera doesn't want your money, honey, it wants your LOVE!


ooh. Transvision Vamp reference...

... firing up Rhythmbox...

ASA slaps Ebuyer AGAIN - this time for ignoring regulator


So who to use now?

I've never had a problem with eBuyer - but never needed to use their customer service either.

I do try and use vendors who play nice so who should I be using instead then?

Leak of '5 MEELLLION Gmail passwords' creates security flap


Re: Multi-user authentication?

Needs two people to log into your account. Simple!

Distributed Linux OS wizards CoreOS release first commercial product

Thumb Down

updating it automatically

>>hopes to keep the OS up to date: by updating it automatically for its users

Not sure that's a good idea. Like giving out your root password to a chimp?

VMware seeks patent for IM chats between servers and sysadmins

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Prior art

NET send from DOS SMB stack in the '80s

+ Windows 3.11 and greater

Just f**k off VMWare

Sony Xperia Z2: What we REALLY thought of this Android fondleslab


Halve the price...

... and I might be interested.

Whitehall and Microsoft negotiate NHS Windows XP hacker survival plan


Upgrade o Linux

Ubuntu + Wine

Give the new MS money to Open Source instead

3CX PBX for Windows: Everything you ever wanted from a phone system



"Cost: Pricing is based on the number of concurrent calls and includes one year's maintenance. It starts at four concurrent calls for €395 and scales to 1,024 concurrent calls at €34,995."

Whereas Asterix is FREE!!

I won't be buying.

Study accuses media companies of cooking the books on piracy losses



that is all

Apple can't dump Samsung, it needs those iPad displays – report


Re: new format

... get a bigger screen?


Re: new format


Washout 2012 summer, melty Greenland 'nothing to do with Arctic ice or warm oceans'



All this stuff has nothing to do with CO2, artic melting, el-nino/la nina, cows farting or too many brown/yellow people.

It's Ming the Merciless screwing with us.

Doctor Who? 12th incarnation sought after Matt Smith quits

Thumb Up

or Julian Barratt

The post is required, and must contain letters.

Thumb Up

Richard Ayoade

That is all.

Help save the endangered QUANTUM OWL, pleads Reg man


>>Joining is pathetically easy

No it's not.

Apart from the link in the article being broken, there's absolutely no mention of memberhsips or how to join on the main website.

I was going to join right now. Today. But I'm not now...

Rid yourself of Adobe: New Firefox 19.0 gets JAVASCRIPT PDF viewer

Thumb Down

Doesn't print properly

Ubuntu 12.04, FF19.

Views nicely but won't print an A4 sheet to scale :(

Nice try but not quite there yet...

Skills shortage may crimp Asia's IT rise


Skills shortage

Is this same (fictitious) Skills shortage we allegedly have in the UK?

Sandy Island does exist - on a 1908 chart


Re: Sandy Island = R'lyeh!!

my thoughts exactly

Should Microsoft merge Office into Windows - or snap it off?


Should Microsoft merge Office into Windows?

They should drop the whole office suite and start contributing to LibreOffice ;)

Apple files 'Shake to Print' iOS patent application


Prior Art

Homosapians have been waving theirs hands around for over 60,000 years - and Apple are now patenting it?

F***ing ridiculous.


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