Re: We already have the solution
Two words: self hosting.
That's only a thin slice of the solution. I have a website and I host it myself (or rather, I pay someone else to host it for me, but I think that's still what you mean by "self hosting"). That doesn't solve the problem.
The first thing it doesn't solve is accessibility. If I want people -- people I don't know -- to be able to look at my hosted material then they have to be able to find it. This they can do by using a search engine ... but as soon as a search engine becomes part of the solution it isn't all "self hosting" any more; you (and your site's users) have to trust the search engine company, and the search engine company is in a position to monetize your data.
The second thing is exclusivity. I may publish the things I want to publish on my own site -- and only on my own site -- but that doesn't stop other people from putting information about me (or other information I'd like to keep under my own control) on their sites ... and they may not be self-hosting, so that information may misused, monetized, and otherwise abused in all the ways you hope to prevent by self-hosting your own site.
So, you're only partly right. Putting the information you wish to share on a website on a server over which you have some degree of control is certainly better than putting it on a bunch of pages on some social media site, but it doesn't give you all of the privacy or the control that one ought to be able to demand for one's online presence. Not nearly.
... but I don't think there is a solution, as such. There's no way that you can stop other people scraping a public website and correlating the data there with data from all the other websites in the world and making connections and drawing conclusions. Big Data analytics is getting to be scarily effective technology, and facial recognition of any photographs you post means that your un-named friends and family will be identified pretty quickly.
The only solution that stands a chance is not to have an online presence at all, and to ask all your family and friends to refrain from posting about you, or posting your photograph, anywhere that they have a presence ... and even that doesn't have much of a chance.