Wonderful piece. It’s so refreshing to read a tongue-in-cheek article from a publication with a sense of humour. And so well disguised too! If I didn’t already know (from previous amusing items) that El Reg has – how shall I say – a well developed sense of the ironic – I might have even take it seriously!
Personally, I’m now thinking about buying shares in the consortium which owns the 90 tonnes (or so) of plutonium currently stockpiled in the UK. I mean, ok yes, that’s enough to build around 11,000 Nagasaki-sized N-weapons, but think of the energy-generating potential! I’m sure that some time in the next 24,000 years humanity will find a way of safely using it. And in the meantime, the UK’s reputation for safe management and transparency in nuclear issues makes it an ideal repository does it not? Yes, ok, I know that Windscale ‘Pile 1’ is technically still ‘burning’– but there have been assurances that it will all be cleaned up by 2038 or so. And, as an added plus, the UK taxpayers generously pay to insure all the UK's N-plants – so I can’t really lose can I?
In short, I'm cheered by your wonderfully optimistic outlook on the current scenario, and I encourage all your readers to give your article all the credibility and respect it deserves.